The best way -ever- to start your sentences:

[Goldom]

Append this to the beginning of everything you say for happiness and joy!

"Under reasonable assumptions about the elasticity of the tracheal wall..."

This was the beginning of a math problem I was reading, and loved it so much I wrote it down. Try it out, it's fun!

Example:
"Under reasonable assumptions about the elasticity of the tracheal wall, my scalp is itchy."
"Under reasonable assumptions about the elasticity of the tracheal wall, the election was stolen."

[billyskank]

1. I'll use that in GD

"..how can I argue with you when you won't even make reasonable assumptions about the elasticity of the tracheal wall? Sheesh!"

[Debi]

2. As soon as I read it

I thought blow job...my mind must be in the gutter today

[Solon]

4. Under reasonable assumptions about the elasticity of the tracheal wall...

She should not have choked last night!

Your not the only one with the mind in the gutter, mine fell into the sewers a while ago.

[ChoralScholar]

6. yeah.. that's what I thought too...

[CO Liberal]

3. "Under reasonable assumptions about the elasticity of the tracheal wall, "

...Robb is a dingbat.

:-)

It works!!! IT WORKS!!!!!

[KurtNYC]

5. I can combine that with my favorite sentence ending

from an intellectual property contract...

"Under reasonable assumptions about the elasticity of the tracheal wall, Producer shall retain all rights to exploit Artists' material forever and throughout the universe in all forms of media now known and yet to be invented.

(btw, some lawyers really do think they are god)

[auburngrad82]

7. This one time, at band camp...

[passy]

8. you make me gag!

[passy]

9. sorry I didn't the Watergate joke.