Are the people in the eHarmony commercials slightly disturbing...

[complain jane]

or is it me?

Most of them strike me as just a wee bit intense...

[Obviousman]

1. The creator of the site

looks like a perverted version of Mr. Rogers

[arwalden]

2. Q: Does eHarmony do same sex matching?

eHarmony does not offer same sex matching services. We're sorry if the placement of recent advertising led you to believe that we offer this service. eHarmony's matching system is designed to match highly compatible men and women who are seeking a successful long-term relationship. Our ongoing research has examined thousands of married couples to determine what factors predict the greatest degree of success in the marriage relationship.

Based on over 35 years of clinical practice and empirical study, eHarmony has discovered what similarities and differences between men and women lead to their most successful unions. This unprecedented research into compatibility has been conducted with the goal of lowering the rate of unsuccessful marriages and divorce by providing singles with a tool for finding truly compatible matches with whom to pursue a relationship. With this goal in mind, eHarmony's research has only examined heterosexual relationships.


http://ems00601.egain.net/system/selfservice.controller?CMD=PRINT_ARTICLE&ARTICLE_ID=1069&CONFIGURATION=1002

[complain jane]

3. Oh I didn't think for a moment that they would accept

same-sex personal ads...

They seem way too obsessed with hetero marriage.

Their loss.

[Left Is Write]

11. What a bunch of hooey.

Science, research, studies, blah blah blah. No one can predict what a relationship between any two people will be like, despite eHarmony's efforts at patting itself on the back. There's a little thing often called chemistry - that indefinable certain something that draws two people together. No program can supply that.

[liberalhistorian]

18. Exactly!

That's what's always bothered me about these sites. I know they mean well, and I'm sure they've worked for some people, but for the most part what you're saying is very true. That indefinable something cannot be found and quantified by science.

[RoeBear]

4. Hi! I'm RoeBear and I met...

...your wife on eHarmony.com

[prof_science]

21. Wow. What a coincidence!

I met your MOM on eHarmony.com!

:spank:

[davsand]

5. I can't see their ads and not think of Mad TV's "Lowered Expectations."

I know it is mean, I'm sure they mean well, but I just keep hearing "Lowered Expectations..."


Laura

[DS1]

6. It would be interesting to see people that were already couples

match up in that site

[sbj405]

8. I read an article about their system and they actually reject most people

as not suitable for being in a relationship. lol.

[Left Is Write]

10. I thought that would be interesting too.

Would eHarmony match me up with my husband?

[Catchawave]

26. My husband and I are totally opposite

...we'd never be matched:cry:

So far so good, 35 years later!

[liberalhistorian]

27. That's just it, and I know

a lot of couples like you and your husband. Romance and attraction are not, and will never be, an exact science, nor should they ever be.

[sbj405]

7. When the ads were in heavy rotation on AAR I got to the point where I

would rip my headphones off and throw them down everything Dr. Neil Clark Cohen came on.

[RagingInMiami]

9. When I got out of a long-term relationship earlier this year

I logged on to their website to see what they were all about. I filled out a questionnaire, answering as honestly as possible about values and interests and experiences.

They rejected me.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

12. Somebody I corresponded with from another site tried eHarmony

and mentioned that he liked classical music and was a liberal Christian. (This is why he was corresponding with me.) eHarmony paired him with fundamentalists who were into country-western or contemporary Christian.

A woman I know in Minneapolis tried a very expensive non-Internet introduction service. When she applied, she made it clear that intelligence and politics were very important to her (She campaigned for Dean.) I heard her complaining that so far, the company had matched her only with dim-witted right wingers.

[Left Is Write]

13. I wonder if that's the same non-internet introduction service

I used in '90 or '91.

I was "awarded" a free three-month membership to said introduction service through a drawing held at a local bar. A couple of other women I was acquainted with "won" also. I later learned that the drawing was rigged so that young women would win - apparently there was a shortage of young female members.

Anyway. I went in, made a video, provided a photo, and filled out a detailed questionnaire about myself. My profile CLEARLY stated that I was a smoker and that I was the single mother of a preschool-aged child. I got dozens of responses. When I went to read the profiles of the people who responded to me, I found that most of them wanted nonsmokers and would not date women with children. So why the heck were they choosing me? It seemed pretty obvious these jokers were looking at pictures only and not bothering to read the profiles.

I went on several dates with complete losers. I met ONE decent guy there, who went on to become a good friend of mine. The funny thing was, I didn't meet him through his profile. I met him in the lobby going to the elevator.

[Kat45]

14. I'm currently on e-harmony.

They've matched me up with a lot of men, but most of them are too far away for either person to bother pursuing it further. With others, the process didn't get too far. They try to match people up more by inner qualities. They might set you up with someone with whom you have no common interests, but the kind of person you're looking for, based on the type of person someone is, might be similar.

That man who founded the co. is a shrink who is also a Christian--his articles are published on a Christian website. Before they started advertising widely, I think they mostly advertised through the Christian site. But I haven't found much evidence of fundies in the people I've encountered on the site. As a matter of fact, some of them have no particular interest in religion.

I'm thinking I should probably try one of those liberal singles sites--what is it, democraticsingles (or something like that)?

[complain jane]

16. The people in the commercials sound like stalkers.

And the one woman with the crazy eyes gives me the heebie jeebies.

[Kat45]

20. Fortunately, I've never seen the commercials.

[BiggJawn]

23. Is that the one who has an eyeball-lock on "her perfect Man"

When they show them together? The one with the crazed look of horror in her eyes?

Spooky...Then there's the petite brunette with the VERY ample bosom..."She had EVERYTHING I was looking for!"

Uh-huh, you got the RIGHT one, Bay-BEE!

I see those spots and I hear "OOGAH-CHA-CHA! OOGAH-OOGAH!"

[Lorien]

29. Ugh. I tried it-what a waste!

Every guy they sent me seemed to be RW golfing Freeper types, and all were horribly obese (why a person would post a full figure photo of themselves when they're packing an extra hundred pounds is beyond me). What was worse was that these heavy, balding men list "must be considered "very attractive" by society's standards" as a REQUIREMENT for potential matches!

[brainshrub]

15. I use match.com

Good site, it's how I met my last gf.

The problem is that if you're a guy, you have to try to contact HUNDREDS of women before one bites.

[liberalhistorian]

19. Yes, and the problem is that if

you're a gal, most of the men are only interested in well-off, young, thin, beautiful, childless women. I haven't been on Match or any other site for a long time, but I remember that when I was, a lot of the men would simply delete introductory emails without even bothering to respond with a "thanks, but no thanks", which is the polite thing to do when someone's taken the time to email you.

[liberalhistorian]

17. As a never-married single mother,

I agree with you, they seem too weird and too desperate, and not at all like just "regular" people. Desperation is NEVER an attractive quality. NEVER show desperation or neediness in singlesland, it's a real turn-off for both sexes.

[complain jane]

24. Yeah, I think that's it.

Desperate and very, very fixated on "forever", "soulmate" & "love of your life". All of those things are wonderful if you find them, but they seem creepily fixated on it and that one woman in particular with the brown hair has a frightening look in her eyes.

[liberalhistorian]

28. You have to be secure

and content with yourself and with being single before you can be secure and content in a relationship and before you can have a successful relationship. You have to make a good, fulfilling life for yourself if you're single, you can't just make your singlehood a "waiting room", only beginning your "real" life when you're in a relationship. You have to have the attitude that if you ever find the right person, that's great, but even if you don't, you're still worthwhile and you still have a good life.

[sundog]

22. It's strictly straight, as was mentioned above.

Prob a bunch of republicans :eyes:

[complain jane]

25. The commercial makes them seem like off-kilter zealots but

a few have already posted here that's not necessarily the case.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not trashing anyone who uses the service; just the commercials.