Serious question for those who say masturbation causes Jesus to cry...

[Deja Q]

Please, let's be serious and grown up for once. If I can do it, then anyone cal do it. And y'all know me for almost 15,000 posts now. :evilgrin:

So when a male human whacks his mole, Jesus cries.

But what if an animal is whacking its own roly poly down there? What does Jesus do? Heck, how many dogs for example HAVEN'T licked themselves down there?

[karlrschneider]

1. Jesus is coming soon!

Well, he's quivering at least...

[MindPilot]

2. Could you use a larger font, please?

xx

[Deja Q]

20. For which sentence?

O8)

[vixengrl]

3. If he's anything like me, he just tries not to look!

(Man--he cries when people...why...he must go through a *lot* of Kleenex.)

[guitar man]

9. heh

I bet he doesnt go through as much kleenex as the people he's crying about. :evilgrin:

[vixengrl]

19. Oh that's funny....

;)

[Guaranteed]

4. Here's my question:

If you can't whack off, and you can't have sex before marriage, then what EXACTLY is a 14-year-old supposed to do?

Just have his balls explode??

[karlrschneider]

5. ROTFLMGDAO...first real belly laugh I've had in a week.

And it's a VERY long time since I was 14. :D

[Guaranteed]

8. There must be some kind of manual release the fundies know about

that we don't.

[Deja Q]

21. Yes. That's a cheap alternative to a vasectomy.

I'm sure Pope John Paul would approve.

BTW: That's where "Pope" came from. "Pope" is Roman for "pop", as in "explosion". :evilgrin:

[sundog]

6. anyone cal do it?

Typing again with one hand Hypno? :P

[MindPilot]

7. Seriously, I can remember nuns saying that.

By the time I discovered self-abuse, I was already pretty certain that most anything a nun or priest said was BS. But I certainly can recall the pain and guilt that reduced a few of my classmates to tears. It's a horrible thing to say to a kid.

Edited for vetting and punchuashun

[jdots]

10. " Every sperm is sacred "

sing along everyone,follow the bouncing unit.

[the Princess]

11. Are there only men in this conversation?

I never gave a rats ass what Jesus thought about masterbation. :)

[Guaranteed]

14. Hey, we talk about what we know.

:P

[the Princess]

15. And women have no experience in this subject!!

LMAO!!!!!!!!

[Guaranteed]

17. Psssh nowhere NEAR what we got.

It's our HOBBY.

:)

[the Princess]

23. Oh HA HA HA HA

You know so little about women!! LOLOL

[truthpusher]

12. I'm making Jesus cry right now!!!

sorry :shrug:

[Guaranteed]

13. Ahhh...been visiting the Naked Bush thread? nt

[vixengrl]

18. Now *I'm* gonna cry....

or barf.

Cry :cry: or barf :puke: .

[the Princess]

16. TMI - dude!

[Deja Q]

22. Need some help?

:evilgrin:

Now THAT was TMI! O8)

[Guaranteed]

25. LOL I think he's asking for it. nt

[Danocrat]

24. Teacher says

every time you yank your thing....











... an angel gets his wings

[BigMcLargehuge]

26. The Surgeon General has also stated that excessive masturbation

causes the mods to lock.

Big McLargehuge
DU Moderator (and member of the near sighted hairy palm club)