Kids on leashes now???

[Touchdown]

We're having our annual obnoxious, screaming brats invading the office party today...and I saw one woman witrh her two kids (a Toddler, and about 3-4 y/o) on this harness thing that goes around their chests, all tethered to her hand. :wtf:

How are they going to learn their own boundaries? How can they learn from mistakes? How can they learn that it's scary to get lost? How can they learn to be terrorized by the impending return to the car after they knock down that pyramid of Chef Boy-ar-dee?

Parents are too protective these days!:eyes:

"Oh yes! They're wonderful boys."
"So why the leashes?"

[gollygee]

1. I thought they were awful till I had a kid

I still don't use one but I understand why parents do.

It allows kids to move around and explore but still keeps them safe.

[TheDebbieDee]

2. I agree with you, GollyGee......

Leashes allow parents to let kids be kids and keep them safe, too!

[Midlodemocrat]

25. I agree with you

I used them in places like Disney, when I had two under two. Just gave me a greater feeling of security.

[Lorien]

55. I see a lot of them at Disney World

I used to work on property, so I would go out into the parks during my lunch breaks. I got pretty sick and tired of walking screaming, crying, terrified toddlers to the lost and found (I usually would find mom or dad on the way there, but not always). I can't really fault the parents; the parks can get VERY crowded and there are so many distractions. I always thought the leashes were a great idea, personally.

[SW FL Dem]

65. I agree with you

I never thought I would use one until my 18 month old decided to climb out of his stroller and hide from me in a large department store in Los Angeles. I only used it when we were in very public places like malls or airports. My son is now a very normal teenager who shows no effects from occasionally being tied to me.

[goddess40]

3. not new

my cousin brought her little boy here and used a harness and leash to navigate the huge airports. The little boy is now in his 30's.

I don't have a problem with it, it's better then a stroller because it tires the little buggers out and they don't disappear in a crowd.

[KurtNYC]

12. Your nephew is Mike Myers?! awesome

;-)

[stranger_with_candy]

28. haha

that's a great sketch...

[cali]

4. They've been around for a long time

and I put my kid on a leash when we were in London when he was three- sixteen years ago. We were staying at my folk's place which although on a quiet street, is two minutes from some of the busiest streets in London. He was very strong and had never been in a city before. He took off and nearly got run over, so off I went to Sparks and Marks to buy myself a kiddie leash. Worked great, he got the idea within two days that if didn't stay with me and hold my hand, he'd get the harness deal.

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

5. My husband was leashed as a child

and he's an all right fellow. Leashes were all the rage back in the late 40s early 50s.

[skygazer]

32. There are pictures of my older brother

Who is now in his 50's, with his harness and leash on tied to a tree in our front yard. My mom used to put him there while she worked in the nearby garden. While I don't think I'd tie my kid up with it, I don't think a leash is all that bad an idea especially when you're trying to shop AND keep track of two toddlers.

[Patiod]

39. My S.O. claims to be permanantly scarred

from being put on one as a kid.

Can't say I blame his mom, though, given some of the stories he tells about his behavior back then...

[haele]

43. Leashes for kids have been around forever...

Besides early depictions of toddlers waist harnesses tied to trees in the fields while the parents worked or babies confined into baskets, I've seen mideaval manuscripts and paintings where 2 - 3 ft long "tippets" were used around kid's upper arms and elbows and held by their mothers while they were out walking and paintings from many other cultures show some sort of restraining system for small toddlers when they were out with their parents at work or in public. No matter what culture, it also seemed that children under three of both sexes were generally dressed in long, confining dresses that tended to be designed to trip them up if they started to move too fast when they went out in public. Even if naked at home was the rule...

Usually, harnesses for kids were for the very young. Of course, back in the good old days, by the time the kid was around four years old, he or she knew enough to either stay around mom, grannie, or older siblings or not to dart out to examine objects that caught their eye, because those things were usually dangerous. They were also helping out around the home by that age, which drained off a lot of that excess energy that got them into trouble when they were just learning to walk.

The purpose of the leash is to keep the kid within sight and control until he or she is old enough to understand that not everything is safe for them to run after. Once cognative thought kicks in, once the idea of cause and effect is understood, once the kid can start communicating and can understand what limits are and why they are, the leash shouldn't be required to safeguard his or her activities in public.
It's almost a catch 22 - the only way a toddler can learn how to act in public is to be in public. Unless the parent(s) have the time to - and can afford to - just take baby out to teach them not to run off or act up in public venues, they're usually stuck taking the toddler out while they're doing other tasks that can distract them from staying in teaching mode - tasks like going to the store or going out to eat.
A leash both helps them to keep the toddler under control, and is a constant reminder amongst all the other distractions that can happen that they're supposed to be watching and training the child. If they're able to teach and there's no learning issues with the toddler, they shouldn't need one for very long anyway.
Once out of the total stroller experiance, my brother was only on the leash for a little under a year (maybe eight months) - and my mom said that I was on one for about 6 months, just to learn the ground rules of being in public.

My two cents concerning leashing.

Haele

[cestpaspossible]

74. My parents used to tie me in the back yard for hours

till I learned to chew through it.

[yvr girl]

6. The had those when I was a kid (30 years ago)

I'm always surprised my parents didn't use one on me - I had a tendency to wander off. One time the whole town was out looking for me. I didn't get home until after midnight when I was 7.

[DS1]

7. Hell, I wish more parents would use them. They can learn about

boundaries on their own damn time, stay the fuck away from me!

[AlCzervik]

8. When i went to the Grand canyon i wished people put their little ones on

leashes as there was no fence for guard rail in many spots. I would see toddlers running way ahead of their parents and i has bad visions going through my head. I held onto my daughter's hand for dear life and made her stay on the inside-furthest away from the hole.

[LDS Jock]

9. some adults don't mind being leashed

so maybe the kids don't either

[Touchdown]

48. Superman undies, is that you?

The more you talk, the more attractive you get!

[LDS Jock]

50. I'm glad someone thinks so

:pals:

[ldf]

58. you mean you haven't heard about

the secret LDS Jock fan club?

all the supercool du'ers are in it.

there is even a waiting list!

:hug:

[LDS Jock]

59. where do I find out more about this club?

and who is in it?

[Lydia Leftcoast]

10. There's a certain age (2 to 3)

when kids are able to walk and even run but don't have a lot of sense or real-world knowledge. They get an idea in their heads and they literally run with it.

They can disappear in a flash. My first brother disappeared in a Christmas shopping crowd on the streets of downtown Minneapolis when he was 3--just slipped loose from my mother's hand and took off. Fortunately, a woman found him wandering around crying and took him to a policeman, so it turned out fine. When asked why he had run off, he said, "I wanted to see the (toy) steam shovels again." The toy steam shovels were on the eighth floor of the second-to-the-last store we had visited.

I've also seen kids that age caught just before they were about to take a flying leap off a dock, run into traffic, or reach out and touch a hot barbecue grill.

The tether on those harnesses is quite long, and being harnessed is actually less confining than being in a stroller.

[SOteric]

45. Quite right, and entirely sobering.

Not to mention that it lessens the very real chance that a mentally ill or perverse individual might easily kidnap and do harm to the child.

[radwriter0555]

11. A parent who has blinked and 'lost' a child for more than 2 heart stopping

minutes in a crowded place filled with strangers knows the value of a tether for the wee ones... especially because ALL kids are different. Some stick to mom and dad like glue, others are the wandering type and become fascinated by bright shiny things, and in one instant are off.

There is no shame in making sure your kidlets don't wander. It's for THEIR safety, which is the most important thing on this planet.

[AlCzervik]

13. exactly. My sister and i went to ikea one day and her daughter

decided to run and hide. I thought i was going to have a heart attack.

[CO Liberal]

14. I Wish They Had Them When My Kids Were Small

One time we were on the midway of a carnival, walking along holding hands. Suddenlt, a few kids came racing throught the crown in bicycles and I was separeated from my kids. I was able to find my son right away, but my daughter was nowhere in sight. We started to search for Gloria, without any luck.

A few minutes later, I heard a familar cry over the PA system. I looked over where they had a stage set up and there was a man standing at the microphone, holding Gloria. He said, "We have a little lost girl here...." and Glynn and I worked our way through the crowd to get to the stage.

Those were the longest few minutes of my life.

[Cuban_Liberal]

15. Those things are bizarre, IMO.

My folks never needed anything besides their mouths and an occasional hand to control us. I think someone needs a refresher course in parenting skills.

[Catchawave]

16. 2 year old twins !

Who hate the stroller !

[Lilith Velkor]

37. I saw 2 year old twins in harness

at the mall about 15 years ago. Both were straining at the end of them, pinwheeling their arms. Made sense to me.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

17. I am with you on this, TD!!

I think the same thing when parents clear every damn thing out of rooms for their kids. Jesbus, learn to tell them no, don't touch that!

I hope this doesn't turn into a flamefest over opposing opinions, but I agree with you.

[Cuban_Liberal]

18. My mami used to comment that it was nice to be able to go places...

... with us, because no one was afraid we'd destroy their houses. For as long as I can remember, I have always understood the meaning of the word 'no', and believed my folks meant it when they said it.

:shrug:

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

19. That's what I am saying. The kids who are never exposed to

temptation turn bonkers when it's presented. Least the ones I've seen... :shrug:

[TX-RAT]

23. Same here.

My dad wasn't much for spanking. He could thump ya on top of the head, with his finger and knock ya to your knees. Never make dad tell ya twice.

[Cuban_Liberal]

26. Yeah, my dad was a 'tell you one time' sort of guy, too.

He didn't much like repeating himself, or having to explain what 'no' meant.

:)

[TX-RAT]

27. No dain bramage here.

[Pithlet]

51. Of course you can always remember what "No" meant.

Because if you were old enough to remember, you were old enough to understand "no". There was a time, however, when you weren't, and you didn't. Parents always like to think that they always had perfect little children. The 2 and under age is well to be forgotten. My mom says I was always well behaved, but I can remember to very early childhood, and I can remember plenty of times when I wasn't.

Children under a certain age can be hit and screamed at 1000 times, and they still won't be able to grasp certain things. Strict, authoritarian parenting doesn't work on little kids. That mentality is a conservative holdover from older days. Most early childhood specialists now realize that those days were wrong.

[Cuban_Liberal]

57. I was never hit.

My parents were fairly strict, but they didn't make the mistake of having TONS of rules; rather, they had just a handful that were easy to remember and consistently enforced (compliance was also rewarded).I also disagree that children under 2 can't understand what 'no' means, however; in point of fact, I know that children under 2 know what 'no' means.

[Pithlet]

60. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insinuate that your parents hit you.

Consistency is key. You're right. A lot of people here think that strict parenting and spanking are the only ways to avoid spoiled children. I was already on the defensive when I shouldn't have been.

Kids may know the literal meaning of the word "no" before age 2, but that doesn't mean they're always capable of acting on it. Their brain is not developed enough yet at that stage to fully understand cause and effect, which means they can't understand consequences, which means they can't realize all of the time that they're doing something they shouldn't be doing. Not to mention the fact that they haven't developed sense of "other" yet. A child under 2 doesn't just think of herself as the center of the universe. She thinks of herself as the entire universe. If she wants to pull the cat's tail, then by definition, the universe wants the cat's tail pulled. They're just not mentally capable of fully making those kinds of decisions. At this age, all you can do is say "no", then physically redirect them to another activity. I'm not saying that a parent should never do anything about bad behavior; they just can't expect that the lesson is going to kick in every time.

That is why parenting a 2 year old is so exasperating. It's saying no and pulling her away from the cat over and over and over and over and over... you get the idea :) We tend to block that out of our memories, but if anyone who's ever been a parent is honest, and really looks back at that time, they will remember very trying times. No child can be trained to be perfect, eve with the best, most consistent parenting, at that age.

I'm talking about very young children, not 3 and above. This is the age that very few people can remember very clearly. Children older than that are capable of understanding consequences. If they know "If I do A, than B happens" then they know what is expected of them, and can act on that.

[gollygee]

29. There are age-appropriate boundaries

young toddlers aren't going to understand not to touch things no matter how many times you hit them. It is normal for children to explore their worlds by touching things. If a young toddler isn't
touching things, THAT might be a problem because they wouldn't be reaching normal developmental milestones.

Once they're old enough to understand, it doesn't take any work or hitting to get them to not touch everything.

I cleared my house of things my daughter couldn't touch when she was baby, and when she was past the developmental stage where she was exploring by touching everything, I put things back in the living room.

[Wcross]

20. My mom tied me to the swingset one time.....

The day after I went on an 8 hour "exploration" of the area with my friends. I was 5 at the time and I guess she thought that was too young to be out and about. She had called the cops in to find us and I knew I was in trouble when I heard all the adults in the neighborhood calling out our names. Come to think about it, I didn't see any of my buddies that day so I assume they were tied up in their backyards.

[SmokingJacket]

21. Some people strap their kids in strollers until they're 4 or 5

Which is much worse, IMHO: no exercise!

I never used a harness, but I wore my nerves to a frazzle chasing my guys down.

It's heaven when they're three or four and begin to actually STAY by your side!

[TX-RAT]

22. I use shock collars.

Hit the button, they squeal. Instantly you know where their at. Also keeps them from chasing rabbits.

[Cyndee_Lou_Who]

30. ROFLMAO

Next logical progression, I suppose.

[Hubert Flottz]

33. I was about to go and see if I could find a matching set of three

lek-trik collars for my son's three little non-stop darlings!(need Cattle Prods)

"So why the leashes?" LEADERSHIP!

Peace on Earth, my a$$!

[Karenina]

44. YABBA DABBA DOOOO!

HI HUBERT!!! :hi: :loveya: :hi:

My oldest got one strapped on after he thought it was funny to hide from mom under a clothing rack. It didn't come off till he THOROUGHLY GROKKED that mom was NOT amused.

[Hubert Flottz]

46. Hi Karenina...

GTSY!

Merry Christmas and a better New Year!

[Zomby Woof]

24. Nothing new

I first saw them being used at Lynnhaven Mall in Va Beach back in the 80's, when I was in high school.

[Lex]

31. Yeah, they've been around for at least 20 years.

I saw them back then too in malls and at street fairs and the like.

[China_cat]

69. I had one for my youngest

30 years ago. Somebody berated me for treating him 'like a dog'. I asked her to remember that the dogs she saw dead on the side of the road were there because somebody didn't care enough to leash them and keep them safe.

My youngest was too much of a handful for a stroller. He rode a backpack until he learned to walk...except for going into bookstores after I found he was grabbing books off top racks and shoving them into the pack...then it was either the leash or leave him at home always. That harness and leash kept him out of traffic, kept him from drowning and kept him from being a dog's dinner. It was worth it.

[Obviousman]

34. It's all the rage since Abu Ghraib

n/t
William Donohue

[Touchdown]

38. LOL! You're sick!

:party:

[ernstbass]

35. My mom leashed my sister when she was 3 or 4

but we all really needed leashes as adolescents!!!

[yellowdogintexas]

36. My daughter was a backpack girl, no stroller ever

and when she learned to walk, and wanted to roam, I started letting her walk ahead of me (fortunately this was a smaller city and the mall was not too crowded) just a couple of feet, she would always stop when I said stop.

Now having said THAT I know I was very lucky that she listened well.
If she had been more impulsive, and prone to dash about, I would have had the harness in 2 seconds. It gives the kids a sense of freedom, yet you know where they are. And they do get tired which means they are more than happy to get in the stroller or backpack for the rest of the day and sleep.

I first saw a harness in use for a toddler in Cambridge in the late 60's or early 70's..couple had seen them in Europe and thought it was a wonderful thing. Apparantly these have been in use in Europe for a longer time.

I would rather see a kid on a harness than hanging by the wrist from some tall person's hand, a dislocated elbow just waiting to happen.

[Patiod]

40. My parents build what they called an "outdoor playpen"

But to this day, I tease them about "the cage", so I could be out back playing, but no one had to keep an eye on me.

[skygazer]

41. I don't find anything wrong with them

Especially when you have more than one toddler to keep track of. It's almost impossible to shop with small children - it's very frightening to lose track of them. And as others have pointed out, at least on a leash, they're getting exercise. I seriously think that one reason we have so many obese children is because they are pushed around in strollers until they are in kindergarten practically. They get used to not walking and exercising early on.

I'd rather see a kid on a leash than running wild or getting lost.

[DrGonzoLives]

42. If it keeps them away from me

I have no problem with it.

[tjdee]

47. What about holding their hands??

I only have one, but I'd rather hold her hand than hold the tether.

All y'all that have more than one, that is some mystical strange thing I can't even understand so I'm all for doing whatever it takes.

[Touchdown]

49. That's what civilized people do. What's wrong with you?!

and...I agree. We held hands and thrived as a species for 12,000 years, but now we need toddler leashes, bike helmets, knee pads, "time outs", constant stroking (encouragement and self esteem construction), pre-natal english lessons, Daddy wearing diapers for "empathy", parents selling girl scout cookies instead of actual Girl Scouts, or society will collapse unto itself.

[Pithlet]

52. I hope you're just being sarcastic

You truly don't believe in the "good old days", do you? I'm glad that there are a lot of things we do differently, today.

[Touchdown]

73. Mostly, no I'm not.

And no, I don't "long for the good ole' days". Way to put a spin on my words.:eyes:

[Wapsie B]

53. I could think of a copycat thread,

but it probably would get locked. ;-)


But to your point, I've seen these leashes too. Yeah kids have to learn their boundaries.

[NoodleBoy]

54. I had one of those things

it went around my wrist-- my mom told me it was a watch.

it just made me wanted to break free more. at my sister's soccer matches, whenever the ball got close to where I was I ran out onto the field, probably because I had the damn thing on and wanted to have an excuse to run.

[matcom]

56. they aren't really effective

unless used in conjunction with the included cattle prod

[fortyfeetunder]

61. A bit of piece of mind....

My kid (now 7) was notorious as a toddler for running away from me at a moment's notice. I could not take the stress of having to spend most of my time looking for him. So I made a deal with him, run away X number of times, or he wears the harness. He broke the rules frequently, so he was wearing it.

I think what finally broke it was on a trip, I forgot to bring a harness. So I went to the nearest store after an exasperating afternoon, and the only one in the store was pink. I bought it. Kid didn't like being in a pink harness....

[WindRavenX]

62. I think they're disgusting

Personally, I find them to be dehumanizing and humiliating. They're kids, not goddamn dogs!

[Zomby Woof]

63. I like dogs better

Better behaved too. I say leash the kids and free the dogs!

[WindRavenX]

64. touche

Except little yapper dogs. They suck.

[Zomby Woof]

66. true!

But their vapid owners never use a leash on them like they should. They carry them around in their sweaters and shit! :puke:

[WindRavenX]

70. because they're little people!!

:silly:
I think animals AND humans should be treated with dignity...and I'm sorry...the leash thing sickens me.

[Zomby Woof]

72. depends on the kid

Some of them need to be leashed AND tasered. I worked with a bunch of kids for 2 months on that play, and I say FUCK DIGNITY, I want some sanity. It's just pussified bullshit to claim it's about "dignity". Dignity died a few decades ago. Duct tape their pieholes too.

I don't like kids much, I can tolerate them at times, but the hell with them for the most part.

[fujiyama]

67. I think they're a good idea

Some kids are just plain nuts and out of control.

Especially if you're on vacation somewhere...Or if you cross busy streets. Some kids have a tendancy to run out in front of traffic as well.

There's a certain limit of course. Obviously by the age of say 6 you shouldn't require one of those.

[pinniped]

68. Some stupid lady could've used one earlier.

These idiots were attempting to cross ( j-walk ) a very dangerous 3-lane in each direction street in SF ( Hwy 1 ) and one of the kids ran across while the traffic was coming. The lady and the other kids held back while screaming at the kid.

The crosswalk was a distant 50-feet away.

[Skittles]

71. when I see kids on leashes

I'm betting the parents have a pretty good reason for doing it. But - it does seem strange to do it at the office. :o

[amazona]

75. they been on leashes since the early 80s

The first time I saw them I remember thinking, well, there are some future bondage afficianados. I guess now some of those leashed toddlers are adults now and can tell us if they did turn out kinky. Hmmm.