My cousin is a freeloader...

[jellybelly]

(He's 23 and married)
He and his wife came to America from (un-named country: don't want to be called racist). My mother allowed them to move in with her, the agreement being that he would get a job and move out in a month...Well, it's been 6 months and they haven't moved out. His wife is working BUT he stays home the entire day eating my mom's food. They are living in a completely private bedroom, with a TV, cable, sofa, and computer...They don't pay their share of the bills but once in awhile his wife gives my mom money...His wife supports him, including his smoking addiction. He constantly says that, "It's payback...I did a lot for my wife...Now she's gotta do something for me." He has never had a job in his life so what could he have done for her before?!

He sometimes offers to pay for food, telling the family, "Choose anything you want...I'm paying." But the asshole takes money from his wife and pays for everything...WITHOUT ASKING FOR HER PERMISSION!! And then whatever change is left over, he pockets it!!!If she asks, "Where's the change?"...HE GETS PISSED OFF!

He is taking advantage of her. He's an American citizen who moved to that country when he was 3 years-old. He came back to the US in order to make money. He thinks because he brought his wife with him to America that she has to do everything he wants...So unfair, I wish I could kick his ass...:grr:

[Rabrrrrrr]

1. What lousy fucking asshole

I think you should kick his ass, since he's freeloading off your ma.

And where are his parents in all this? What the fuck is up with that?

What an asshole.

[jellybelly]

3. He was eating up his mom's money

That's why she forced him to come to America to make money...I hate him with a passion. My mom has kids to support but he doesn't give a fuck. He expects everything for free.

[GRLMGC]

2. Why would you be called racist?

Anyway, he sounds like he needs to have his ass kicked

[jellybelly]

4. Because when race is mentioned in a post

sometimes the 'racist' word is used. It happened when someone talked about an Indian waiter...

[GRLMGC]

5. Oh, I see nt

[fluffernutter]

6. where's Skittles, she'll kick his ass!

what a creep, people like that make me ill. your mom needs to give them the boot.

[jellybelly]

7. I tell her that all the time...

Everybody hates him...He has absolutely no blood running through his veins...if he did, he would've gone back to his mommy a long time ago...
He is now forcing his wife to but him a car...and he doesn't even need it, it's not as if he has a job!:puke:

He just wants to show off...he has a woman working for him and a car...What a mother fucker:mad:

[Karenina]

47. Definitely do a Skittles

MIND-MELD. Your Mom needs your protection and whatever help you can give to remove this festering sore from her personal space ASAP. How is it theat she is so obliged to her sibling's child? Just curious.

[jellybelly]

8. kick

I'm starving for attention...

[Longgrain]

9. Sounds like my brother...

He's been unemployed for almost three years now... lives at home with my parents... drinks himself silly every night...

He definitely need a big :kick: in the rear!

[jellybelly]

10. I'll help you kick him

that's what flirting buds are for}(

[Longgrain]

13. Seriously...

The problem is, no one can talk to him...

He's been through rehab once, and has tried to apply for a job, or two recently...

He just won't motivate himself to do anything...

Part of the problem is that he's been bringing me down along with him...

(I.E. I have to live at home now to help my mother support him, and my father (who is also unemployed))...

Sorry JB...I just needed to vent a little...

[jellybelly]

14. too bad

does he get jobs but quit after 3 days (like my cousin)? If he does you should kick his ass...but if he can't honestly find a job you should help him...give him motivation...

[Longgrain]

17. No, he hasn't had a job at all in three years...

part of it is the area I live in (10% unemployment rate, ya know?) put part of it's is him, just not wanting to get off his ass and do SOMETHING!

He won't even get up and go out with his friends anymore...

[jellybelly]

19. sounds like depression..

it'd be different he could get jobs but then quit...since he can't find one, you have to find one for him (that's what my mom did for my cousin...she wanted to see if he could work if given the chance, but he quit for no reason)
Test your brother out...maybe he'll actually work if given the opportunity...he's just too lazy to go LOOK for one
Tell your parents about my cousin...they could give me advice:thumbsup:

[Longgrain]

21. He doesn't want to work...

Even tho everyone I know keeps trying to help him...

It's a very complex situation...

I will be sure to bookmark this thread, in case any other advice/ information shows up...

[jellybelly]

23. it's great that your parents have you then

:hug:
you're so good, how many people would help their parents out in that way?

[Longgrain]

25. N/T but...

:hug:

[jellybelly]

26. we always end typed conversations by hugging...

:hug:
that's good right?;-)

[Longgrain]

28. Yes! One more...

Since I got to go to bed soon...

:hug:



















What the hell...here's another...

:hug:

[jellybelly]

30. me too...my eyes are googly...

:hug:

[flaminbats]

32. here's one from a part timer..for you and your mother

:hug:

and even one for cousin and his troubles...:hug:
who knows..we live in a time that Democrats are becoming Republicans and vice versa. In another year he may be a different person.

[jellybelly]

34. Yeah...he'll be single and in back to his mom's house

:evilgrin:

thanks flaminbats:hug:

[Must_B_Free]

11. culture is relative here

if he were african, then there is nothing wrong with that. African cultures are familial and ideas of ownership are not as strong as the western notions.

Many Africans will come and stay and must offer the same in return.

So cultural issues are key here...

[jellybelly]

12. no african or anybody else

could get pissed when his wife wants her change back...nobody will eat food reserved for kids, and smoke 6 packs a day. you're weird...:P

[liontamer]

45. african does not explain laziness

Expecting to live with your family is common to a lot of cultures, refusing to work is not.

[yardwork]

15. I think you ought to kick his ass for your mother's sake

Seriously. In a choice between your mother and your cousin, your mother deserves your support. Kick him out.

[jellybelly]

16. If I lived with them...I would force him out...

it's up to my mom.
He drinks all the milk intended for the baby, he never buys his own,
And he has about two thousand dollars with him...

[Bunny]

44. Perhaps you should remind your mother of Eleanor Roosevelt's great

quote: Nobody can take advantage of you without your permission.

[flaminbats]

18. at least he isn't on welfare...

thank God for welfare reform and those who will kick those fat asses out of public housing! :nopity:

[jellybelly]

20. he would be if he wasn't living with my mom

[flaminbats]

22. how terrible...

maybe mom should kick him out, try a little Christain compassion! ;)

[jellybelly]

24. My mommy is conservative....LOL!

So is he...he goes to church constantly, how could he take advantage of his wife like that then?

[flaminbats]

27. a freeloading conservative?

nothing new about that..afraid to earn money because he might have pay taxes like any other citizen.

[jellybelly]

29. oh my god! you reminded me...

he bitches about paying taxes! LOL!
and he pays everything with exact change, he waits in line at the checkout, counting change...My mom once gave him an extra dollar so he could pay the cashier and get the hell out....HE FOUND EXACT CHANGE BUT DIDN'T RETURN THE DOLLAR. HE PUT IT IN HIS POCKET RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER! AHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

[Swamp Rat]

31. Group intervention with LOTS of people, then tell him to GET THE FUCK OUT!

He's slowly killing your mother, you know. Call the police at the FIRST sign of resistance. Come down HARD as a hammer and rid this nuisance once and for all. x(

[jellybelly]

33. I know...she is honestly stressed out

I think his wife will leave him...then who'll support him?
She works 12 hour days and tries to save up for the future. He is ruining her life...

[Swamp Rat]

35. Stop caring about this man. Care about the others who are his victims

Forget his wife for the time being too - take care of your mother FIRST! Once he is out of your lives, things will return to normal and you and your mother will be so much happier.

Perhaps this "Bad cousin" will learn a lesson too, or his wife will find her freedom from him in the near future. Nevertheless, you must expell him immediately or else your mother's life will deteriorate, and so will the quality of your life too.

Good luck! You can do it! :thumbsup:

[jellybelly]

36. I will do my best...but since I don't live them I can't do anything too

drastic.
My mom is horribly depressed sometimes. There's no space for everybody...She sleeps in the sofa bed:cry:
He has the bedroom.

[Swamp Rat]

37. Can you move there temporarily?

Or 'pretend' that you MUST move in immediately and they have to leave as a result - no room, and YOU take precedence over them, etc. You and your mother don't owe them anything nor must you give them a reason for your actions, but you can come up with somehing creative if you like.

Does your mother own her home? If so, have her "sell" it to you, just move in and kick them out. Take control of the situation. You can do it, but you must be a hard-ass and NEVER back down. Your mother's life is on the line! :mad:

[jellybelly]

39. They would sleep on the kitchen floor if they had to

I have to force them to go back to his country...everybody ignores him but he walks around the house like he's a god. I need to make him WANT to go back... but how? He is too damn comfortable, where else could he live like a king for free? This is a very big problem. Thanks for the advice. I appreciate it so much:hug: I'll try to come up with something.

[flaminbats]

38. tie cousin jelly to your car..drag him though your streets

tie this rat to a telephone pole..gather all your friends and neighbors then stone him until sundown. Leave him tied up until sunrise, then publicly whip this animal until he cries. If he still fails to find work, sacrifice him to Vulcan..dance around a fire in praise of his name!

:nuke:

[jellybelly]

40. hmm...stoning....

I would kill him if I could get away with it...I blame my mom too for not kicking him out after a month...That was the deal:shrug: Because my mom likes his wife she doesn't want to throw them in the street...:grr:

[flaminbats]

41. nice...

I don't understand why anyone..especially a Democrat would post this, but since you have...why? :shrug:

Is this just to be bitter? We all have problems..all of which can be solved. I have the impression you don't want your cousin to succeed or remain married, but you would be pleased to see his life fall to pieces.

The core of being a Democrat is wanting the best for all people, regardless of one's personal feelings!

[Swamp Rat]

42. Pat... is that you?

:D

[Karenina]

48. Your posts have brought tears to my eyes, SR

You DO get it. JB, your cousin is a serious threat to your Mom's health and well-being. She has YOUNG CHILDREN TOO? :argh:
Please get clear and act as you best know how. Sie braucht DRINGEND ein Ritter ohne Furcht und Tadel.

[Swamp Rat]

51. Danke.

My family has survived a very similar situation, perhaps worse. Das Leben kann schwierig sein. :hug:

[the Princess]

43. I match your cousin and raise you a whole family of freeloaders

That is why none of my relatives know where we live - except my parents and believe me that's enough.

[NewJeffCT]

46. well, a freeloader is better than a Freeper

Of course, the worst would be if he's both...

[Skittles]

49. good LORD jellybelly KICK HIS F***ING ASS ALREADY

HE IS IN DIRE NEED OF A GOOD ASS-KICKING AND NO DOUBT HIS WIFE THINKS SO MORE THAN ANYONE

[Karenina]

50. Y-A-A-A-A-A-Y!!!!

SKITTLES IST IN DA HAUS!!!! :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

[Swamp Rat]

52. Dat's what I'm talkin'bout!

:mad:

[pinniped]

53. I could make a post using that same exact title.

Same shit at my mom's house except single and add about 12-13 years.

Stay for the summer while getting a new job, save up for an apartment and move the fuck out. Look what month it is now.

I realize at times it 'may' be necessary to take someone in, but these are definitely cases of people being too comfortable and obviously not wanting to move the fuck out.

I will have to go over there and evict someone pretty soon. Parents are too nice but they are getting a little fed up with this BS.