What's the meanest practical joke you've ever played?

[jandrok]

I'll submit this for your approval....

Back in college I lived in a dorm. I had a roomie as did all of the other guys on the floor. Most of us were pretty cool, but there was was this one homophobic, highly strung fellow living on the floor. We had a gay friend who he used to harass all the time.

One night, this highly-wound fellow went out and got drunk. Real drunk. So drunk that he passed out in the hallway, key still in the lock. Couldn't leave the poor fellow out in the hallway all night, right? He was out like a light, no consciousness at all.

So we opened his door and got ready to pour him into his bed. But wait! Let's have a little fun. What could we do to this guy that might leave....an impression?

So....we dropped his pants. We then took a rubber, filled it with a few drops of shaving cream mixed with mayonnaise, and used a pencil to poke it up his ass. We replaced his pants and put him to bed. For added effect, we also took a matchbook from a prominent gay bar in town and put that in his pocket.

He was real quiet for a few days after that.

What can I say? We were young.

What's yours?

[fudge stripe cookays]

1. You're EEEEEVIL. .

But I have to admit the idiot definitely brought it on himself.

Nicely done.
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[sui generis]

11. hiya!

sometimes evil attains the status of art - that one gets my nomination!

[fudge stripe cookays]

17. Hey sweetie!

Long time no see!

Didja'll have a good holiday?

:D
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[xultar]

2. I melted some exlax with some chocolate & formed it in an ice cube tray

and let a kid steal it from my locker. That got his ass. HE was always stealin food & candy from my locker.

[CrispyQ]

13. Years ago, we had a food thief at work too.

Whoever they were would take only the 'good' stuff. So we ordered pizza, ate a few pieces & before putting the pizza in the company fridge, we dribbled ipecac syrup all over the remaining pieces under the cheese. For at least a few weeks after wards, we heard comments that the food thief seemed to have stopped.

on edit:

Not mean, but at another work place, one of our best & most popular salesmen was on business travel on his birthday. Since I was his admin & had access to his office, I got a bunch of empty beer bottles, an couple of old pizza boxes & tossed them around his office. I put up a "Happy Birthday" banner & tore it in a few places. The icing on the cake? I got some women's panties & bras placed them in his office. Not only some sexy ones, but also a pair of very 'big girl' panties & bra. He about bust a gut when he returned the next day.

[xultar]

25. Great ones! I'll file them away. n/t

[TXlib]

37. I made ex-lax brownies in high school

somebody was always stealing my snack off the bus before we went to cross country meets.

They stole the poisoned brownies, and had the shits on the bus on the way over.

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

3. My mom on April Fool's day when i was in H.S.

called from work while I was at home on vacation. She starts yelling at me, saying that I'm grounded. I have no fucking idea what's going on when she tells me "April Fool's".

She thought she was so frickin cute.

So, when she comes home from work, all tired from a long day, she sits down in the living room. She, as usual, asks me to pour her a glass of wine. Of course, I obliged her... with red wine vinegar.

No sniff, just a large gulp and a burning throat. :evilgrin:

[paula777]

4. Tied a fishing line around a fake plastic spider and hung it on my sister

in laws sun visor in her car, so that when she was driving and the sun was in her eyes, she would pull down that visor and the spider would be hanging right at eye level.

Nah, I never really did that but I did think about it.

[TNDemo]

5. Can't beat that but here's a couple.

When I was in college several of us girls went to the mall to go shopping at Christmas time. It was absolutely jammed with virtually no parking spaces. We sat waiting patiently for a car to pull out of its spot and right as we were getting ready to pull in a car with a couple of girls races in and grabs it. They were laughing their head off. So after we parked we stopped by their car and we took a bobby pin and let all the air of their tire.

I did one other mean tire trick when in college. This guy had stood me up two days in a row. The first day I thought maybe I had misunderstood but after the second night I was really pissed that I had spent my weekend sitting in the dorm waiting on this dweeb. Same girlfriends and I went over to his apartment. We let their air out of all four of the tires on his van. Looked like a cracker box sitting on the ground.

A meaner one was my aunt - who had a roommate who slept on the top bunk. They made Ex-Lax brownies that night. After the heavy sleeper on the top bunk was out, they tied her hands and feet to the posts and then set the alarm to go off at 3:00 AM. She then leaped to turn the thing off and pooped on herself.

You said MEAN, so these were mean.

Oh yeah - one more. I have a friend who went to a Christian College in San Diego. They had a guy there who was really wrapped up with the whole rapture thing. One night in the wee hours they cleared everyone off his dorm floor, then one guy stood at the end of the hall and played his trumpet (Gabriel) and then went downstairs. The guy woke up and thought the rapture had come and he was the only one left.

[ProdigalJunkMail]

6. i chucked a manequin out of a skylift tram

from 800 ft up on April Fool's day about a thousand years ago...not really mean, but I thought it was pretty funny at the time...when I got back to the bottom of the mountain and the police were waiting for me, I had second thoughts.


theProdigal

[Richard D]

7. Well . . .

I was at a boy scout camp. It was lunch time, and there were bottles of hot sauce on the tables. When another camper got up to go to the bathroom, I poured a lot of hot sauce on his food, and then mixed it in. He came back, took a mouthfull of food, turned red, and grabbed his glass of chocolate milk to cool off the flames; in which I had also poured a lot of hot sauce.

I still fee guilty about this sometimes.

[Lautremont]

8. I bought a bunch of fish heads

and hid them here and there in my friend's van on a hot day. One under the seat, one tucked in the engine block, one in the fan...

Boy, that was mean.

[dr.strangelove]

9. Shaving Cream, Toilet Paper and Locked Doors

The guys in my dorm were relentless. Here are the best three I was involved in. Two were my idea, one is an oldie but a goodie.

1) Exploding Shaving Cream. We froze a can of shaving cream then using a can opener, take off the back. Then put the can in someone's bed. As it thaws, the cream expands to the point where it fills the bed and leaks out the sides. VERY FUNNY. Old but still worth doing.

2) TPing someone's room. A friend was in Aruba for an extended Spring Break. Being the jealous type, we broke in his room and unrolled 96 rolls of Toilet Paper. We hung each strip from the ceiling with tape only one inch apart. It took over 3 days, but filled the entire room to the point that he could not get in when he got back. The paper was so much it filled like 15 garbage bags.

3) We then screwed with our RA. One day he was very drunk and passed out. We went into his room and cut his phone line while he slept. We took his TV and radio and left him. Then we placed a large board against his door which was larger than the opening. We braced it in place. When he woke up, he opened his door, which opened inward, and saw the message we painted on it. (It was nasty). He could not move the board since it was braced very well with 2x4s and such. He could not call for help since he had no phone (I'm old and this was before cell phones). He yelled out the window for hours until finally another RA heard him and got help. He was pissed and we paid dearly, but it was a great joke. He was in there for about 8 hours.

[RagingInMiami]

10. Back in Tempe

I got real drunk with the guy who lived in the apartment across from me. Me, him and some other guys were yelling off the balcony to some other people when another guy from an apartment down below yelled "Shut the fuck up."
At the time, we thought it was hilarious and yelled some more, until the cops came and shut down the party.
So the next afternoon, when my friend had stepped out, I taped a .45 caliber bullet to his door accompanied with a note that said "you got one of these with your name on it". I signed it "your pissed off neighbor that didn't sleep last night."
I waited all day for him to get home, so I can watch the fun threw my peephole.
I ended up having to step out, which of course, is when he came home. He got so freaked out, he called the cops, who had to accompany him inside his apartment and look under the bed and in the closets.

[JimmyJazz]

12. This isn't that mean since the person I did it to laughed about it...

But in college, I had a roommate who was very prudish and would blush over anything related to sex. We would tease her about it and she would laugh because she knew she was kinda uptight.

One day, I got a copy of Playgirl and cut out just the private parts and strategically placed them around her dorm room - I think she almost peed when she pulled down her shade. Days later, she was still finding the pictures.

[RagingInMiami]

16. And enjoying them, I'm sure

[LynzM]

14. We made our RA's room disappear

He went home for a weekend....

We bought drywall and tape and white paint and an outlet and some of the runner for the wall near the floor. Totally disappeared his room.... Complete with poster over the space where his door was. Watching him walk down the hall, walk past his room, slow down, turn around, PRICELESS!

'Course, I lived in an engineering dorm, so we did stupid shit all the time, but that was my favorite, I think. Balloons and t.p. and that stuff isn't as original.

[fudge stripe cookays]

19. Classic!

I would LOVE to have seen it.

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[LynzM]

22. Yeah, it was fun!

There are pics somewhere, I should look for them...

[sui generis]

15. when we were teens we had a friend who was really

into metaphysical stuff.

My brother and sister and I held a goofy "seance", and with the help of some brilliant green crystals from microbiology lab, a whole bunch of rigged special effects, gregorian chants playing in the background, and a creepy stormy night, by and by we managed to paint the boy permanently green from his hairline to his pubic line without him knowing it.

Brillian Green is a protein dye, and it's, well, brilliant green. We didn't tell him he'd changed color, and he didn't discover it until he went home. Took about a week to wear off. I am sure there are still voodoo dolls floating around out there with our hair on them.

[HEyHEY]

18. I shot a man in REno...just to watch him die

[cags]

20. I'm am queen of practical jokes, heres some of mine

I once stole the clothes from total strangers who were skinny dipping in a public pool.

My poor sister gets it all the time:

I put zip ties on her sprayer on the kitchen sink so when she turned the sink on she got sprayed.

I put a "HONK4SEX" on her license plate, and she didn't realize it for 2 days. I could barely hold in the laughter when she told me about all the honkers and the smiling cops.

At birthday parties I used to put "For a good time call with my sisters #" on the helium ballons them let them go.

This is kinda bad but I taught her toddlers bad words.

Oh and my husband has a really nasty aunt, so he and I plus some other family members, filled her mailbox with that hard insulation foam, and taped blown up condoms all over it, then topped it off with one of those smiley faces.

And the best thing is to keep an airhorn in your glovebox. Golfers really hate that. And kids walking down the street are the funniest things.

And once I took the neighbors front porch chairs and put them down the street

I know I'm so bad, but I can't help it and I'm afraid I'm rubbing off on my daughter. She actually wanted a gorilla suit for x-mas so she could play pranks on people.

[fudge stripe cookays]

21. I had AWFUL neighbors when I lived in Denton

The one who lived next to me was a single mom with an uncontrollable teenage daughter. We all had common porches, so one day, she grabbed a bunch of my plastic chairs that I had stacked there and she and her friends all got comfortable.

Later on, I asked them to put them back, that they were not hers to use. I had to leave for a while and my mom was visiting. She said they were trying the doors, messing around in my bushes, etc. When I got home I told her if I ever caught her messing around again I'd call the cops. It went back and forth like this for awhile. Her being a pain, me complaining to management, etc.

The couple upstairs were always wrassling around on the floor, and I'd hear these huge BUMPS while I was trying to study or sleep. And they'd turn their stereo way up too. I tried being nice for awhile but it didn't work, so I'd just pull out my broom and bang on the ceiling.

When I moved out, I waited until just about everything was out. We still had to empty the litter box, and someone found a box full of gift wrap we'd almost missed. This gave me an idea.

I filled some pretty little gift bags with cat shit, poofed up the tissue paper all nice, and then left them on their doorsteps to find, with nice notes for them inside about what fucked up neighbors they were. Felt really nice afterward after all the crap I put up with from them.

:evilgrin:

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[jandrok]

23. Man, these are some GREAT responses!

Ya'll got some evil trickery in you. My side hurts from laughing. I love good practical jokes.

Keep 'em coming. This is really, really good stuff.

[Texasgal]

24. Here's my entry

Back in my teenage years my Brother whom was slightly older than I, was constantly being accused by my parents that he smoked pot.

He narked on me for something stupid ( I can't even remember for what ) that caused me to be grounded. I was so pissed that I got him back.

I went to the kitchen and grabbed the bottle of Italian seasonings and pored them into a zip lock back, which I casually placed on his bed in his bedroom!

Well, Mom found it and that's when the fun began! He was taken to the bathroom by his ear and flushed the pseudo pot down the toilet, he was then forced to go through 6 months of drug rehab through PADAP!

Here's the kicker, into his stint with rehab, My brother finally convinced me that I should come clean and tell my folks what I had done, I admitted the debacle to them and my Mother screamed " Don't try to cover for your Brother!"

Priceless..../.

[Lady Sonelle]

26. While Whipping A Slave...

I convinced him I'd torn the skin of his back off!

He had said, before the scene "Mistress, I want to be frightened..."

I knew that being terrified was his main head trip, so I'd prepared beforehand. I did a light overall whipping of his back with a heavy suede "cat" which made the flesh very sensitive, but also altered the way the nerves 'interpreted' the sensations. Then I did a light rubdown with ice-water and a rough towel which chilled his back...

When he evinced signs of being too cold, I casually threw a leather jacket over his shoulders and firmly massaged his back to "warm him up"

This trick needed the complicity of the audience and the slave being blindfolded. I had shown him *a* leather jacket before the scene (had made him hang My undoctored jacket up, so he knew it was there) I then removed the jacket. What he didn't see and the audience did (but were silent about) was that inside the second jacket, loosely fastened were a number of strips of masking tape, adhesive side outward.

I did a bit more whipping, this time with a far heavier whip (the tape served to protect his back, but transmitted the sharp sensations) and then, I commented that the whipping had loosened and cut the skin! He started shaking and slowly I began "peeling the raw, bloody strips from his back"! An assistant gently poured heated oil to both loosen the tape safely *and* to give him the sensation of blood rolling from the injuries. The audience complied by gasping in horror and the DungeonMaster began remonstrating with Me "My GOD, Sonelle, STOP... You're HURTING him! Someone call an ambulance!!" One person even faked the sounds of throwing up...

My blindfolded slave nearly fainted in horror! Finally, when the last strip of "skin" was removed, the blindfold was taken off and he was shown (with a mirror) his slightly reddened but undamaged back! DEFINITELY the head-trip of the year!

Lady Sonelle

[cags]

27. You are scaring me

[LDS Jock]

28. no kidding..

:wtf:

[LDS Jock]

30. check another of her posts

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=2365129&mesg_id=2365738&page= :wtf:

[sniffa]

29. hi and weLcome to DU

:hi:

[meegbear]

36. You naughty, naughty girl you!

We've got to talk to talk sometime!

[Patiod]

31. I get a sick pleasure out of reading these - mine as so wimpy

A friend pulled one in college that was more funny then mean - someone in the dorm had this bonsai-like plant, about six inches high that he called the "little tree". When he went home for break, they stole it and replaced it with an identical plant that was about 3 feet tall. Scared the bejesus out of him.

We used to get Del, the local DJ who had a smooth persuasive voice, to do crank calls for us. "Is this Kathy Smith? From Dresher? I'm with UPS - there's a box down here in the lobby, and they won't let me bring it up - you have to come down and sign for it. It's from the Maple Glen Bicylce Shop?" People were definitely willing to believe UPS delivered at 9pm if they thought it might be a bike.

My guy friends tied up one of my sorority sisters, toilet-papered the room, and then made overseas calls from her phone. One guy dialed Germany, and when someone answered he said something and hung up. He told us later he had asked "may I sharpen my pencil, please?" which is all he remembered from Junior High German class.

[snooper2]

32. here's mine..

back about 10 years ago when I was renting a mobile home on some property I had a party with some friends over. One of our friends, Rusty, got drunk as shit and passed out on my bed.

So, we made up a batch of chocolate pudding and let it sit for about an hour. Then, worked his pants halfway down, and smeared the pudding all over his ass and around that general area...then shut the door and continued drinking...

The next morning we heard some banging around when he first got up and the shower running....He had wrapped up all of the sheets and insisted on washing them for me since he slept on my bed...

To this day he still thinks he shat on himself in the middle of the night!

[Red State Rebel]

33. Got my boss...

At work, I always backed into my parking spot. I went to lunch one day and when I got back, I happened to notice something on the back. He had put a sign that said CAUTION! Woman Jeep Driver.

A few weeks later - dead of winter - I went to the bowling alley where they had a company league. My friend and I proceeded to decorate his car as Just Married complete with signs, crepe paper, shoe polish writing on the windows and a trail of tin cans. My boss was mid 30's and single.

We went into the bowling alley, had a pizza and a couple of beers with them all and left, he didn't leave until 1 in the morning and with the temps in the single digits couldn't do a thing about his car. It was hillarious when he came in the next day driving his mom's car - he was ready to kill.

My son told us about his time in college when they duct taped one of the guys to his desk chair, put him in the elevator of a very tall dorm and pushed all the buttons.

[Patiod]

34. You can do things with creme rinse, too

Friends of mine rented a beach house together - a lot of guys and girls. One of the girls was always going on about how long one of the guys took in the shower, and she speculated about exactly what he was doing in there.

So one time after he took a shower and she was next in line for the bathroom, they snuck in before she got there and squirted creme rinse all over the faucets, the spigot, and the shower curtain. They said it was amazingly realistic, and she started showering exclusively in the outdoor shower.

[Mike Daniels]

35. Tricking someone into chugging syrup of ipecac (spelling?)

We were at a party and some clown was mouthing off and being obnoxious. So someone spiked his drink (soda actually) with the syrup and challenged him to a drink off (beer vs. soda).

The guy slugged down his drink and proceeded to spend the next few hours in the bathroom out of everyone's hair.

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

38. Two incidents (these are long)

1. I used to live with two other women. One evening while I was waiting and hoping for a phone call from this idiot guy I thought was interested in me, one of my roommates kept calling from work. My other roommate and I took revenge by "decorating" a "growth poster" of a soccer player she had on her wall. We connected a bunch of tube socks, taped them to his nether regions, propped the member up on the seat of her exercise bicycle, covered the seat with Saran Wrap and put some mayonnaise in a strategic spot on the seat. She came home later with a guy (fortunately he didn't go into her room) and screamed bloody murder when she saw what we had done.

2. I used to work at a hospital in Wichita and made presentation slides for physicians (this was in the days before Powerpoint, and it took a long time to type slides and have the film developed and slides made). In preparation for April Fools' Day, I decided to trick a gullible coworker by telling her one of the orthopedic surgeons needed a bunch of slides in 2 days. I got the doctor in on the joke; he even loaned me some orthopedic surgery textbooks. I spent an evening painstakingly going through the books and coming up with approximately 100 slides, which I typed and put on her desk with a note. She started typing frantically and unbeknownst to me paged the doctor to ask a question about them. Naturally he forgot about the joke. She was furious with me - "I paged him out of surgery!" How was I to know he'd forget? It's not like he had anything else on his mind!

[pdx_prog]

39. I worked as a sound engineer for many years....

one band I was touring with was in Houston for a week. The drummer had a pickup, and we drove a 24 ft. tractor trailer. We borrowed his pickup one day to go somewhere and we had a duplicate truck key made. We paid this guy at a muffler shop to help us early the next morning before the drummer got up. We drove his truck, and the big truck down to the muffler shop, put the pickup in the air with the help of a lift and drove the pickup into the back of the big truck.

He woke us up a few hours later freaking out because he thought his truck had been stolen. The cops came by and he almost got into a shitload of trouble because he called them....



One place I worked, we had this little mousy girl that was temping in the office. One of the guys that used to work there was a deputy sheriff and came by frequently. One day he came by while she was at lunch so we decided to play a trick on her. He folded up some paper to make it look like a warrant, and as soon as she came in he said "are you _______?" (I forget her name) she, very carefully said "yes" then he said "I have a warrant for your arrest", handcuffed her, then put her in the back seat of the police car just like a criminal. She said absolutely nothing and he held out as long as he could before cracking up. She was just going to go right along with him to the jail I guess.


We were playing in some small town in Arkansas one weekend with another band. We got up to leave at about 6am......one of the guitar players had hooked up with this girl and wanted the room. We told him he could have it as soon as we left. One of the crew took out the top drawer of the dresser and took a shit in it.....as we were leaving and the guitar player was coming in we winked at him and told him we left him a present in the dresser drawer....making him thing it was a doobie or something. The lead guitarist came in to get him a couple of hours later, andwhen he walked in he said the smell just about knocked him over.....the guy laid there with this old girl for 2 hours in a room that smelled like crap and did nothing.....lol....he said he thought it smelled kinda funky in there....lol

[WCGreen]

40. This girl I really liked back in Jr High

was hired by my mom to clean our house. Now rumour had spread that my step dad was on sopers, you know the real good old fashion 714's,

Well, this gal was in my SD office, cleaning away and found what she thought was 714's and were really harmless Lecithin? pills. (Not very bright gal, mind you) Well, she took two and when nothing happened, she called her friend in and told her what she had done. She came to me, crying about this girl and how she had taken some of my SD's pills...

Well, I spang into action, fake called the Free Clinic, burnt some toast, mushed it into warm milk, and made her throw up all the pills she had taken.....

I secretly loved every minute of it as I knew the pills were harmless since I had already taken the 714's away so that she wouldn't take them....

Heh, Heh, Heh......

[WCGreen]

41. I just realized, my 800th post was about a practical joke........

All Right Then....

[democracyindanger]

42. The PeeChee Attack

Take a PeeChee (A regular paper folder), and tape the bottom and side. Fill it with shaving cream. Slide the open end under the victim's door. When they bend down to pick up the PeeChee, jump on it, expelling the shaving cream in an explosive manner.

Boy, was my RA pissed.