One of my students used Revelations to rationalize doing no work all week

[iconoclastic cat]

Check this one out: One of my students has done absolutely no work all week; instead she has spent all of her time reading that bloody Glorious Appearing book. Usually, I try to use positive reinforcement of good behavior to draw reluctant students into the work at hand, but this girl just wouldn't bite. Yesterday, in fact, I went out of my way to compliment all of the people sitting around her for their hard work, but she just grinned and read that pathetic excuse for propaganda.

Today, however, I had had enough. "Carmella," I said, "Your grade is falling. You have lost an entire letter grade because of all your missing work and lack of participation. Get to work. Now."

Did she open her textbook? Nope. She just sat there, grinning. We stared at each other for a while, with all of her peers whispering around us. Some of the students chided her, while others whispered about the look on my face (which must have been classic). Finally she said, "Mr. IconCat, the world gonna end!"

Blink. Blink. "Um, what?"

"The world gonna end! Jesus gonna come back, kill all them gays and a-rabs, and then I'm goin' t' heaven!"

"Nevertheless," I said, "you are currently both alive and on Earth. Get to work."

She shook her head and laughed. I heard reciprocal laughter throughout the entire room. "Mr. IconCat, JEEE-zus don' care about no grades! I'm goin' to heaven! Maybe even before grades come out!"

"I see," I said, and walked away. Jeezus indeed.

[eleonora]

1. OY

That's just plain scary. What are her parents teaching, man!

[smbolisnch]

2. Please tell me she was just being a smartass?

If not, that's truly frightening. How old are your students?? :scared:

[iconoclastic cat]

7. They're all about 15 to 16.

I do hope she was being a smartass. Somehow, I doubt it.

[smbolisnch]

16. Wow. Scary stuff that kids believe.

Good luck........

[LiberalVoice]

3. Fail her and send her ass to the principal.

[LiberalinNC]

8. That's what I say!

Since she won't listen to reason, then let the little smartass fail!

[iconoclastic cat]

12. She has enough points to pass, but if this keeps up, she will fail.

I have a feeling that she has decided to go on a mental vacation.

[LiberalinNC]

33. There is only so much you can do as her teacher,

the rest is up to her! If she has decided not to participate in class and do her work, she deserves to fail. It might just be the "slap" in her face she needs.

[iconoclastic cat]

34. As I said downthread, the more I talk about it,

I find myself feeling like a bit of a sucker. I think she must be bluffing.

[iconoclastic cat]

9. Oh, I documented this one, believe me.

Nothing will come of it, however.

[St. Jarvitude]

4. What grade level is this?

I'm going to guess it's somewhere around middle school... but sheesh! What wack-jobs her parents must be :crazy:

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

5. Does'nt this violate the Church vs State laws in some kind of way ?

As a trick ( even though it would be taking time away from your teaching but it would still be funny ) fake the rapture in the class one day with fake hellfire and brimstone falling from the ceiling and see how crazy she acts ? Its funny all of these fundies say that they are ready for the rapture ( which is not true ... ) and when it supposedly happens ( because it aint ) they are gonna be the first ones running scared .

[Rabrrrrrr]

6. Sounds like she needs homeschooling

There's no reason that the other students should have to put up with her.

[iconoclastic cat]

23. This group has a strange dynamic.

They usually ignore her, but they are oddly protective of her in certain situations.

[Systematic Chaos]

10. You aren't bullshitting?

Well, all I can say is she deserves a DOUBLE 'F' for every day's worth of work missed. I had a gym teacher in high school who did that. If you attended the class but didn't make a decent effort to participate, your grade that day would be an 'F', plus a previous day's grade would also become an 'F'.

On a side note, you reminded me of a time during my short stint in college when my math teacher wanted to demonstrate mathematical principles involving card tricks. He asked the whole class, before even offering to do that the following day, if there was going to be any objections. Why? Because some JAY-zus freak had previously gotten him into a lot of hot water a couple of years previous, saying that he was corrupting her education with "the Devil's tools".

Can we just ship them all to their own little island, Truman Show style, and watch in morbid fascination while they all off each other in squabbles over coconuts?

[iconoclastic cat]

18. I am absolutely serious.

She knows I am entering zeros for these missing assignments. Her parents might be able to help, but they are very slow in responding to my voicemail messages.

[skygazer]

11. She's reading it in class?

Take it away from her. I don't know how old your students are but I'd take the darn thing away while she's in class. And her answer to you, I would consider mouthing off and suitable for some kind of disciplinary action.

[Maddy McCall]

17. I would take the book, too. And it would merit disciplinary action.

[iconoclastic cat]

20. I don't want to go into the politics of this school,

but I have already been told that I cannot confiscate a student's possessions. I have also been told to be very careful about writing disciplinary referrals for non-violent offenses. I am on my own on this one, as far as that goes.

I will, of course, give her the grade she earns.

[Maddy McCall]

40. Yes, if that's the best you can do, so be it.

Sadly, taking a book would not be reflected on her permanent academic record, but an f for a semester will. Sometimes school adminstrators fail to think out the consequences of their policies.

:shrug: What can you do, though?

(Another sad thing. This child will never make it to college, and even if she did, her introductory world civ course, in which evolution is discussed, would probably cause her to drop out. Oh well.)

[punpirate]

13. If I told you my response...

... to "... JEEE-zus don' care about no grades! I'm goin' to heaven! Maybe even before grades come out!," you'd understand why I stopped teaching twenty-five years ago.... :)

All I can say is that I sincerely hope this young lady is an isolated instance among your students, and not a general example.

[iconoclastic cat]

19. Oh, she is most definitely an anomaly.

To tell you the truth, she scares me a little.

[Maddy McCall]

14. Jesus wants her to have a life as a cashier at Walmart.

If she's lucky, she can move on up to greeter in her elderly years.

What a rube. I've NEVER had that excuse given to me. How old is this student?

[politicaholic]

15. I recommend being fair and if she doesn't do any work fail her.

[madison2000]

21. You know, the people who lived in the first century believed this-

that they were living in the "end times", and much of the non-gospel New Testament reflects this. Christians have been waiting for it to happen ever since.

The problem is it makes for really scary ethics. If the end is coming soon, nothing matters. Unfortunately, its infected our politics too- who cares about the environment, if our real home is in heaven and the whole story is going to end soon? Who cares about the way we treat other nations if the history is already predestined in some grand theological drama?

Its got to be one of the most pernicious ideas ever thought by human beings.

[democracyindanger]

22. God helps those who help themselves

By not making any effort to educate herself, she's not helping herself; ergo, she's not following scripture, and won't be raptured.

[iconoclastic cat]

26. I don't think that she has all achieved that level of logical thought.

She seems to be more of a parrot than a wingnut-in-training. Somebody is feeding her this crap.

[democracyindanger]

30. No doubt

It's just something I would've said to put her in her place.

I also might've asked, "Where's your pirate? I see that you're a parrot, I'm just wondering where your pirate is." :evilgrin:

[Lenape85]

24. What kind of school district are you in

I'm in freeperland and I've never heard anything like it.

[iconoclastic cat]

29. This is an urban district in a blue state.

You have to understand, though, that I don't think this young lady really understands what she's saying.

In regards to the political climate in this neighborhood, how about this: In October there were a lot of "Keyes for US Senate" signs around.

[chaska]

25. I hate to agree with the kid, but enforced education is a waste of time.

Do you think this kid is ever going to be an intelligent human being regardless of how much book learnin' is forced on her?

We educate ourselves, or not at all.

School is mostly a waste of time.

[iconoclastic cat]

31. Life is what you make it, chaska.

All I want is to help her function in whatever part of society she chooses.

[saltpoint]

27. "Jesus don't care about no grades"

He don't care about no grammar neither, I guess.

I'm very sorry this young woman feels this way. My guess is her grade report might just slip in under Jesus' deadline.

[trof]

28. First: It's Ay-rabs.

Second: I just...I just...I just...
Oh gawd.
Are you pulling my leg?
Please say you are?

[iconoclastic cat]

32. No. Not one bit.

The more I talk to my fellow DUers, however, I am beginning to wonder if I am the sucker in this situation.

[iconoclastic cat]

35. I hate to self-reply, but I am beginning to think that I have been duped.

She must be jerking my chain.

Wow, I don't think I should play poker with this chick.

[ET Awful]

36. Next class, stroll over to the window and yell WOW, IT'S HAPPENING

People are flying up into the sky!!!!!

When she runs to look, just say . . . well, you must have screwed up somewhere, because a hell of a lot of people just took off, and you're still here. I reckon that means you should sit your ass down and do some work.

[iconoclastic cat]

37. Seriously, though, ETA, I think I was severely bullshitted.

She can't possibly think that. She just conned me into letting her get away with doing nothing!

[ET Awful]

39. Maybe so, but my idea would still serve to shut up her excuses

and tell her you ain't havin' it :)

[MsMagnificent]

38. Standard Fundie thinking

They also believe that, since 'once they are Saved, they are Saved Forever' that they can sin, sin, sin away because they already have their get-into-heaven-free pass.

Ridiculous.

[Taxloss]

41. Yikes, that is one deeply fucked-up kid.

It would take a lifetime to untangle that, if anyone ever bothers.

[sakabatou]

42. Fail her.

Talk to the other teachers in her schedule to see if they're having the same problem.

[MisterP]

43. holy cow, somebody tell Ulysses! (the DUer)

[kodi]

44. remind her of what happened to jesus for bucking the system

.

[Kire]

45. then start packing your things

[tk2kewl]

46. i didn't think there were people that backwards in Chicago

[Starlight]

47. Even if Jesus DID come back, these people aren't going to heaven!

Why can't they see the obvious??? If/when Jesus actually does come back, the Bible makes it very clear that hypocrites & followers of the anti-Christ will burn in hell for eternity. They don't have a snowball's chance in hell, so to speak. :P