My fundy mother decided I was demon-possessed.

[Ladyhawk]

Apparently, she called my counselor and told him that she'd been snooping around on my forums and found an autobiographical piece I'd meant to be interpretive. She concluded that I needed to be exorcized. I'm not kidding.

I've tried to calm her down by being calm myself and asking her not to snoop when I'm on the Internet because I'm supposed to be anonymous there. I hope she listened to me...sigh.

My mother is a right-wing member of the Christian Coalition, worships Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell, listens to and dittoes Rush Limbaugh. I was raised with this, but in recent years, I've rejected the whole nine yards.

When my counselor first told me about the "demon possession" idea, I started laughing and couldn't stop for nearly five minutes. It was either that or cry for longer. My mother is weird. I could give you a lot of stories to prove that, but I think this one is enough.

She's also a gossip and I'm sure half the town knows (and believes) I'm demon-possessed. My town is weird, too, by the way.

Hopefully, she listened to me. If she didn't, I'm afraid I'll be assaulted by fundy preachers, held down and prayed for. She did this once when I was depressed, minus the being held down part. I let them pray for me as a courtesy to her, even though they weren't supposed to know about my problems. It was private.

She acts normal most of the time, then POW, she does something really strange, so I never know how much danger I'm in. I think she'll let it go, but sheesh.

[Brucey]

1. My best wishes to you, that is difficult to live with.

My advice: love her for her faults, forgive her, and continue to work on your own self-actualization and find truth on this bitch of an earth.

[demnan]

2. I'm so sorry

It makes me appreciate my agnostic mother who read us science books as little kids. We grew up in a totally different atmosphere.

I find it hard to believe people are really like this. I hope you can get out of that little town and independent of Mother soon, although I know she is your mother and of course you love her.

[Ladyhawk]

3. Yeah, I know I need to leave,

but actually doing it is pretty hard in a lot of ways, including financially.

Recently, I've come to the uncomfortable conclusion that I don't really like anyone in my family, except for my nephew, who is still too young to be a dittohead or a weirdo fundy. It feels weird. I know I can't trust them...this story is a case in point, after all.

I need to mourn them and move on, but currently I'm pretty trapped.

I don't want to talk about it too much because, well, I just got stung by some people.

[Gman2]

5. Bring em on

Forgiving mom is one thing. If fundy preachers hold you down or in any way restrict your movement, sue for kidnapping and civil rights violations. This could be a great case for the supremes. Not to mention a chunk of change in your pocket. I say this as a christian. Fundies are anathema to true worship. They need to be exposed.

[emad]

4. My foster mother once tried this number on me too, just after

she'd been busted for trying to sell me to a brothel, when I was about eight years old, to pay off her court fines for soliciting. Luckily, the police eventually intervened and my real parents got me out and into therapy, which helped exorcise the real demons!

The trouble with fundamentalists is that they project so much of their own insecurities and failings on others, instead of dealing with their own abuse issues, that it forms a chain reaction of guilt and hurt.

In the end I had to get legal restraining orders through the courts against my foster mother.

She's still pretty crazy and not talking about being raped by catholic priests when she was five, which I guess must be the start of her mania. But I've stopped being drawn into her guilt rap because I've learned not to pollute my hard-earned recovery through feeling sorry for her and thus enaling her to carry on ranting and raving her way through more denial.

[Maddy McCall]

16. No truer line has ever been typed on DU:

"The trouble with fundamentalists is that they project so much of their own insecurities and failings on others, instead of dealing with their own abuse issues, that it forms a chain reaction of guilt and hurt."

God did you hit the nail on the head!

[soupkitchen]

6. Laughter is the best exorcism

[OneBlueSky]

7. possessed by the "Spirit of Democracy" . . .

nothing wrong with that . . . glad to see you're feeling better, Ladyhawk . . . laughter is indeed the best medicine . . . peace . . . :)

[YellowRubberDuckie]

8. Your mother sounds like mine...

and I've decided mine is mentally ill. It doesn't excuse her problems, but it does help. Of course, after college, my relationship with her is going to pretty much be non existent, and she's going to be alone. She too loves Rush, thinks Jerry is a genius, and Pat Robertson is going to save us all. Sadly, I think the need will arise soon where I am going to have to start looking for a hospital for the woman. This is not something I want to deal with.
Ladyhawk, if you ever need an empathetic ear, I'm here.
Duckie

[T Wolf]

9. There are many of us who have families

that make our lives difficult. And it is very hard to know how to deal with them. They are, after all, family. Especially when it is a parent or sibling, you have to decide how "far" to push things.

My mother turned into a Limbaugh-fan late in life. Luckily, my father is a long-time, Massachusetts liberal so I was not subjected to too much crap from her.

The advice to take the high road is good, IF you can. It sounds like you just may have to bide your time until you can escape. And for that, you have my sympathy.

The politics of the right have torn apart this country, and many families. My wishes go with you.

[TlalocW]

10. Well, if there's no hope...

You might as well push it to the extreme.

Go get a copy of Penn and Teller's book, "How to Play with Your Food." In there, you'll find a magic trick where you show three tortillas front and back, put taragon on them, draw a pentagram on wax paper, and heat them 3 times in the microwave for 6 seconds each time (666), and in the end, a nice image of the devil's head will appear on one of them.

TlalocW

[GOPFighter]

11. Fundies are hard to live with

I know, I was raised in a fundamentalist Baptist church. When I was real young they were okay...but then politics creeped in. They started debating whether "negroes" had souls, and if they did, was heaven segregated. They preached love (except "negroes"), they preached peace (but supported military buildups), they preached that we were to place our faith in God and trust him to keep us safe, but they were petrified of Communists (evidently their God wasn't up to protecting them from the Commies). They were so proud of me when I went into the service during the Viet Nam war (where I learned to drink and cuss and carouse-and got started on the road to atheism), and they were so ashamed when I got out of the service and went to college (where the communistic professors corrupted my beliefs). When I expressed shock that the young National Guard troops would shoot their fellow Americans at Kent State, my mother said she supported their decision even I had been one of the students shot to death. Needless to say, I learned something about love that day!

My parents are now dead and I rarely see my fundy brothers and sisters anymore. They have been totally sucked into the Christian Coalition crap. Sad.

I sympathize with you, Ladyhawk. I would probably become VERY anti-social if I had to live near my family and their Bible-belt neighbors. IMO, it's the fundies that are demon-possessed!

[Ladyhawk]

14. I have become afraid of socializing.

You said, "I sympathize with you, Ladyhawk. I would probably become VERY anti-social if I had to live near my family and their Bible-belt neighbors. IMO, it's the fundies that are demon-possessed!"

I find that as I get more depressed, I withdraw more and more. For awhile there, I tried to get to know people, but didn't find anyone I truly felt was worth knowing. That sounds harsh, but this county is a red county with a big dollop of fundamentalism thrown in. Those who aren't right-wing fundies have lives, to put it bluntly. They don't need friends.

I once took an old man from our chorus to see the musical Les Miserables because my mother was going to be gone that day and I had an extra ticket. He talked about right-wing politics and supply-side economics the whole way, then interpreted the political meaning of the musical. I just wanted to enjoy the musical.

I told him outright that I was on disability.

He said, "That becomes a bed for some people,"--yeah, $757 a month sure is cushy--"but I bet you're stubborn enough to stop relying on the government."

I don't WANT to rely on the government. I want to be well, you old fart.

I wish I had said this out loud, now.

He kept e-mailing me right-wing editorials. I decided to take him out to coffee a few times and he wouldn't shut up about politics. Finally I told him, "I don't want to talk about politics, OK?"

He said that's all he knew how to talk about and if I couldn't, he had nothing to talk about.

Fine.

A few weeks ago, he sent me another right-wing editorial and I told him that thanks to him and Bush's bungling, I was now as left-wing as could be...and don't send me any more right-wing propaganda.

Sigh.

My mother says I'm at war with the world. I don't want to be, but when your mother says you're demon-possessed, are you just supposed to sit down and take it? When some old fart won't stop flatulating his opinions in your direction, do you just continue to let him?

I think a new community would be of great help. Here, I feel like I'm constantly on guard.

I'm guessing most of you won't understand...it's hard to explain.

[arwalden]

12. I Don't Know What To Say...

... I'm sorry you have to put up with that. It's not fair. I hope things work out.

-- Allen

[AntiCoup2K4]

13. WHO's posessed?

My mother is a right-wing member of the Christian Coalition, worships Pat Robertson and Jerry Falwell, listens to and dittoes Rush Limbaugh.

Sounds like SHE is the one posessed by Satan's minions to me :evilgrin:

[Bossy Monkey]

15. Tell her you appreciate her good intentions, but the road to hell is paved

with good intentions, and you can't be party to her paving the road to hell. Ought to hold her for a while.

[qb]

17. Some ideas...

Try to find a Unitarian/Universalist church in a nearby city - some have "recovering fundamentalist" groups (not that you're a recovering fundamentalist, but they'll definitely understand your issues). I'm not suggesting you join UU, just check out the support groups. You might also see if you can find a Humanist group (perhaps a local chapter of the American Humanist Association). These are groups that will definitely be sympathetic to your dilemma, and may be able to help you strike out on your own.

[Blue_Chill]

18. demon-possessed???? Really????

I'm Catholic and even I find it hard to believe that people jump to this conclusion so quickly.

Always makes me wonder if maybe my bible is missing a few chapters.

[amazona]

21. it has become something of a fad

It is not based on the Bible. After all, if you look at the Gospels, all you would have to do to remove a demon possessing yourself or another is to utter a simple one or two sentence prayer in the name of Jesus. Even the New Age modernization of this by Edith Fiore is pretty straightforward, you call on your higher power or God as you envision her and tell the possessing entity that it is holding back its own afterlife by attaching to another's body and that it will now go into the light to find its new life. If you really want to get fancy, light a white candle and sprinkle some salt water over the possessed person. Takes about 10 minutes. If this is really your problem, it works right away, and the spirit does not return. It has graduated to its next life.

Now if someone needs a full-blown production to gratify their sense of drama or to put money in the pocket of self-appointed exorcists, whatever, but none of this is necessary and it is probably actually quite counter-productive. Fundies should actually crack the Gospels open once in awhile instead of brainwashing themselves with various weird "Christian" literature that has nothing to do with the Bible.


people should have themselves purified or exorcised before offering to exorcise others, in any case, one person's demon is another person's individuality

[Kamika]

19. Did you ever consider writing a book?

Seriously, i dont know alot about you but the small bits and pieces ive read here sounds like it could be a pretty interesting semi autobiographical book

[Ellen Forradalom]

23. Or a screenplay?

Selling the film rights to your life might pull you out of your financial hole. I say this only half-jokingly.

[TheReligiousLeft]

20. "As a called

minister of the church of God, and by God's authority I say your demons are gone, your sins are forgiven. Go in peace, to love and serve the LORD."

Okay, all done. Now you can tell your mum a nice Lutheran boy got you all fixed up.
Good luck with the mum. I've been through a few Fundie churches in my day, they didn't like me asking questions. My advice would be get the heck out of that town, it sounds kind of crazy.

[Interrobang]

22. Can you get your mom a prescription for lithium or something?

Pardon me, but it really sounds as though she's genuinely mentally ill. The periods of relative rationality punctuated by periods of off-the-wall looniness sound rather suspicious...

[Sequoia]

24. I know your pain

okay, that's a real lame line, but I know where your coming from on that fundy stuff. Here's a little humor I was just about to post but you need it more. Hang in there!

[e-mail]