I haven't been on much in about 3 months.

[BlackVelvetElvis]

Geez, what a blow regarding Khephra! I wish his family peace. Damn.

I haven't been on due to a family crisis-mom was diagnosed with dementia (I'm the primary caregiver). I've missed the Lounge and all it's levity.

[flamingyouth]

1. I'm really sorry to hear about your mom

I've missed you around these parts.

Best of luck to you. Do you have respite care in your area? :hug:

[BlackVelvetElvis]

2. Thank you dear!

What's respite care?
I hope YOU are doing well too!

[HeyManThatsCool]

4. It's hard to know what to say to that

Because it has to be such a difficult situation.


Keep your chin up & stay as positive as you can.
Your doing a wonderful thing

[BlackVelvetElvis]

7. Thank you!

I wish you luck with the iPod. It's a great little gadget.

My mom is my best friend and my love! She'd do the same for me.

[flamingyouth]

6. It's someone who can come in and give you a break

Usually your local senior services agency offers it (they do here in Seattle/King County). So you can have a few hours here and there.

[BlackVelvetElvis]

9. I'll make a note of that.

I will probably need them. Thanks again.

[intheflow]

11. Here's a listing of respite places

in your area: http://www.respitelocator.org/locatorsearch/SearchResults.asp#Winston%20Salem

[BlackVelvetElvis]

12. Very sweet of you, intheflow!

thank you!

[intheflow]

13. The link is broken.

So I'm sweet but mildly incompetent. :silly:

Here's the link to the respite locator search I used. http://www.respitelocator.org/ They search by city.

You HAVE to take time to care for yourself, you know. You'll burn out otherwise and then you won't be able to take care of your mom. :hug:

[BlackVelvetElvis]

14. I already did that!

Fortunatelly, there is one pretty close by.
Thanks again!

[intheflow]

16. Another site if

money is an issue.

Volunteer and pro-rated groups: http://www.nfcacares.org/ed/resources.cfm#9

I think I sent you to a bunch of private nursing homes last time, and given healthcare costs in America, thought I ought to give you yet more alternatives.

Good luck, Friend!

[MuseRider]

3. I missed you

and noticed you were gone even though I do not hang out in the lounge too much. I am sorry to hear about your mother. I have been in your shoes as have many others here. Ask if you need help and good luck.

[BlackVelvetElvis]

5. Thanks MuseRider! n/t

[intheflow]

8. Welcome back, BlackVelvetElvis.

I don't know you, but I wanted to give you a hug. :hug: When I was a kid, my cousin was primary care-giver to my aunt with Alzheimer's. It was hard for her to go through. Glad you can join us tonight.

[Droopy]

10. Sorry to hear about your mom, BVE

We have a forum in the groups category called the Mental Health Support Group if you are interested in posting there. It moves kind of slow, but there are several people who post there regularly.

Welcome back! :hi:

[BlackVelvetElvis]

15. Thanks. I posted there.

Maybe there is something to slow it down? Hopefully.

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

17. You're a saint for being the caregiver

I just took a course in Elderly & the Law, and it's shocking to think that so many adult children are unconcerned about demented parents and want to shuttle them off to the nursing home. Bless you for the time and attention you're giving your mother.

[BlackVelvetElvis]

18. Thanks, Depose.

I have the best mother. I'm not doing anything she wouldn't have done for me.

[DeposeTheBoyKing]

19. When my mother had cancer and we took care of her,

She burst into tears when I was helping her to the bathroom and cleaning bedpans (she broke her leg when the cancer got into her femur). She felt so helpless and embarrassed that I had to do that. I said, "Mom, you changed my diapers when I was a baby; I'm just returning the favor!"

Does your mother have moments of lucidity, or is the dementia pretty severe at this point?

[BlackVelvetElvis]

21. She's in the early stages.

But, she has lost about 75% of her vocabulary, she forgets my name and calls me "mama" sometimes. Apart from the heartbreaking moments, she's pretty good. Thank god those aren't too frequent.
Thanks for sharing your memory with you mom.

[PartyPooper]

20. I was thinking about the DU'ers I've missed around here lately,

and you're one of them!

Sorry to hear about your mom. Please take good care of yourself, too!

So glad you checked in with us!

:grouphug:

:hi:

[BlackVelvetElvis]

22. Thanks, PartyPooper!

I'll need to check in from time to time for some fun.