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I loved playing high school football. In hindsight the funnest part was sending pompous, trivia baked, marshmallows like PimpleAss home crying to their mommas. These idiots always had an opinion on how the game should be played on the sandlot and would take their ball and quit when they could not stack the rules to suit themselves. These weasels would then show up every August to try out for the Varsity with their shiny shoes, their forearm pads, and their fancy air helmets their daddy bought. Many would quit after blowing chunks the first day of conditioning. Most would slink off home to their card collections and memorabilia without changing after the first Oklahoma Drill. However, these fucks do not give up on their sporting dreams. They become play by play announcers. Ingrown Anal Hair was not even good enough for that. Lo and behold he makes a mint playing the NeoConSkinFlute on the radio. Because of this the pied piper of Freeperville finally gets his chance to make the Varsity. If only to sniff jock and talk shop with the Varsity on ESPN. The Portly Prince of Pimpe gets cut from the team AGAIN for being a snotty, racist blowhard. Good riddance Cystic Sphincter Man.
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