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Edited on Sat Oct-04-03 12:07 AM by Prisoner_Number_Six
Feeling connected again after all those years
I've spoken here before about my six-year period of unemployment, and my decision to start my own from-home business. I think it's now time to speak of the overriding motivation-- why it's so important for the newly-and-long term unemployed people to keep trying.
I loved my old job as a landscaper, for many reasons. Although I didn't necessarily like my employers (and sometimes my fellow employees), I enjoyed my work, although I never analyzed it at the time. It wasn't until later that I realized just what it was that was so fulfilling about what I did.
I was connected.
I travelled. I met people. I saw new things. Almost every day, I had a fresh chance to meet someone new, often in their homes, and sometimes at their places of business. I had a constant opportunity to shake a new hand, have a conversation in a different living room, or admire a new child's favorite toy or play with their pets as I worked in their yards.
I was good at it, too. I was having a fantastic time, but because I was working 12 hour days and going to bed exhausted each night, I never realized how special my days were. So when I lost my job and along with it the daily stimulation and the adventure of exploring the city and its residents, I fell into a depression and lost interest in a lot of things. I was broke, so I lost the chance to be out in the world, just doing things. As hope for employment faded I stayed up later and slept later, and eventually became downright sedentry in my daily routine. I lost my muscle tone and became flabby and weak, which only served to aggrivate the arthritic condition that had led to my job loss. I fell into an endless, self-reenforcing whirlpool of uselessness and loneliness, and I was cut off from almost everything I used to know.
I was disconnected.
I knew it, too, but there was really nothing I could do to shake myself out of my apathy, until out of a desperate need to simply GET OUT OF THE HOUSE I put back a bit of my disability money and took some night courses in computer tech. Since I had been building machines for ten years anyway as a hobby, I ended up helping to teach in many of the classes I was in. I suddenly found I had the chance to talk to new people again, and to my astonishment it began to invigorate me! (I now have a girlfriend who was a fellow student in some of my classes!)
I became determined to take advantage of the momentum I was building, so after completing the classes I proclaimed myself a Sole Proprietor and within a couple weeks I had begun meeting people in their homes again, chatting and interacting with them as they watched me repair their magical boxes. It recently hit me-- I was back in the old groove. I was back out in the world, engaging in life in the ways I only now realize I profoundly missed.
I am engaged in life again. I am reconnected. I'm back to 12- and 14-hour days. I travel throughout Greater Dallas, and I come in contact with sometimes six or seven new clients a day. I come home tired, but not exhausted. Rather, I'm exhilarated, and ready for more. For the first time in six years, I'm having fun. I'm back!
I truly feel sorry for the cube dwellers, the factory workers (been there, too!), and all the others who are forced to do the same thing in the same place, looking at the same faces day in and day out. You have no idea what a feeling of completion there can be when you do something new for somebody new, in a new place each day. Or, perhaps you do, deep down, and this missive is doing nothing but depressing you. That is not my intention.
My intention is to encourage one and all to reach out. Stretch your hands, your hearts, and your minds out past what you think are your limits. I've discovered all those limits are false, mostly imposed by one thing-- your limited, sometimes fearful perception of yourself. It's my hope you are able to find a way to break your bonds and your fear, and find a way to connect to life to your fullest capacity. It may not be easy-- very little in this life is-- but IT CAN BE DONE. The living proof is before your eyes. If you knew my entire story you'd be completely amazed!
To the newly unemployed, I say: Never give up. It IS possible to find something new, and quite likely better. Don't freak! Don't despair! Don't spend the day in bed, in the easy chair, or walking along, staring at your feet. Look up! Find a way! Use your head, your heart, and your soul. Never, ever, EVER give in to the black thoughts chasing through your head. Take heart in the fact that out there, there is someone who fell, hit bottom, and was able to get up and climb back out of the ditch. IT CAN BE DONE.
To the long-term unemployed, I say: Don't you think it's time you got off your ass and get back into the game? Break's over, people. Time to reconnect! Hustle up!
To the cube dwellers, the factory workers, and all those among you who feel cheated and stifled in your jobs, I say: I know. I've been there. I may one day be there again. But they'll have to put me there kicking and screaming. There's independence and freedom out there for those of you who want it badly enough. Don't listen to the cynics and naysayers. Ignore the petty, ignorant, bad bosses. Screw 'em! Look inside yourself for what you can do, then go do it! You can make it work!
----
High Flight (an Airman's Ecstasy)
by John Gillespie Magee
Oh, I have slipped the surly bonds of earth
And danced the skies on laughter-silvered wings.
Sunward I've climbed and joined the tumbling mirth
Of sun-split clouds - and done a hundred things
You have not dreamed of - wheeled and soared and swung
High in the sunlit silence. Hov'ring there,
I've chased the shouting wind along and flung
My eager craft through footless halls of air
Up, up the long, delirious, burning blue
I've topped the windswept heights with easy grace
Where never lark, or even eagle flew.
And, while with silent, lifting mind I've trod
The high untrespassed sanctity of space,
Put out my hand, and touched the face of God.
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