HUSTLER'S ASSHOLE OF THE MONTH:
George W. Bush
Just as the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, the turd never drops far from the shitter, particularly in the case of rectal slime baby and current Republican presidential candidate George W. Bush. Just "Junior" splashes down to join his father, former President George Bush (Asshole of the Month, November 1988), in the toilet of infamy as HUSTLER's Holiday 2000 Asshole of the Month.
While no intelligent person would doubt that Dubya has spent a lifetime cruising on Papa Bush's fumes, only a fool will deny that W. has earned his crown of sphincters all by himself.
As a "compassionate conservative," Bush promises to "usher in the responsibility era" and "blow the whistle on failure." This is big talk, coming from a hemorrhoid whose family connections have allowed him to sidestep responsibility like so much dog shit. If a whistle blew for every one of Dubya's failures, every American would be deaf, and free from this septic gasbag's effeminate whining.
After being waved through his father's alma maters at Andover and Yale-where the "unexceptional student" reportedly seemed "to have majored in drinking"-Junior dodged the Vietnam draft in 1968 by signing up for the Texas Air National Guard.
At the time, the Guard had a year-and-a-half waiting list in Texas, but George, whose father was then a Houston congressman, was ushered into flight school, despite scoring 25% on the pilot-aptitude test.
Last year, the Los Angeles Times suggested that strings had been pulled to spur G. W.'s incredible lucky streak in the Guard. The candidate shot back, "There was no special treatment." When further scrutiny indicated that a family crony had exerted influence, Spurious George's story changed to a limp-wristed, "All I know is anybody named George Bush did not ask...for help."
George of the Bungle continuously failed upward during his entrepreneurial years. A series of oil ventures invariably flopped, but with a father in the White House, the gilded fuckup encountered no shortage of sycophants to further fund his ineptitude. Bush bailed out of the last such firm, Harken Oil and Gas, with a suspected insider trade that sparked an SEC investigation. When the apparent impropriety was exposed in 1994, Bush hid behind his mother as she addressed the allegations. "It makes me pretty darn mad," Babs fumed over the questioning of her son's honesty.
more at:
http://www.tom-davis.org/politics/asshole_bush/