I am the DU "homosexuality detection expert". Ask me anything

[LynneSin]

:D

I mean if the family council of idiots led by Spongophobe Dobson can have one, shouldn't DU have one too.

Of course, unlike the Dobson, I love Spongebob and think the world of everyone including gays, straight and everyone in between!

[wellstone dem]

1. Is Opus Gay?

[LynneSin]

4. Probably, he never did consumate with Lola Granola and here's the scoop

So is Steve Dallas.

But I loves the penguin so it's all great for this world!

[KitchenWitch]

2. Is Sandy the Squirrel from Spongebob gay?

[LynneSin]

7. She's the beard

But only to protect the children of the world. Underwater Sea Creatures, unlike us humans, embrace homosexuality. Heck half the critters who live under the sea reproduce by asexual budding!

[meegbear]

3. What are the "tell-tale" signs of detection ...

so non-homosexuals like me would know who's "on the take"?

[Thtwudbeme]

9. Lesbians

drive Subarus
wear Birkenstocks and flannel in the winter
have lots of toasters

Look for those signs first!!

[CrownPrinceBandar]

57. Damn, I'm a lesbian.............................

Umm,

1) Own a 98 Sub wagon
2) Wore my Birks yesterday, wearing flannel right now.
3) Have owned multiple toasters.

I guess I'm my town's finest male lesbian. Call me, ladies!

[LynneSin]

10. If you have ever voted for a liberal in your lifetime you're either gay...

know someone is gay, loves someone who is gay or for some reason respect and admire the gay community.

We're on to all o fyou!

[meegbear]

21. You nailed me!

Naughty people like me don't stand a chance against your acute homosexuality detection skills.

Alright everybody! Back in the closet!

[Fleshdancer]

5. am I gay?

I don't feel particularly gay, but I admit, I don't exactly know what feeling gay feels like. That other guy said something about tolerance and diversity were code words for gay so I should be gay...I just don't know. I also like Spongebob. :shrug:

[LynneSin]

12. Remember, 100 years ago Gay meant happy

So, are you happy?

[Fleshdancer]

15. well, I'm a little tired, but...

yeah, I'm somewhat happy for the most part. I guess I'm semi-gay??? Holy Crap! This means I'm bi, doesn't it?

[LynneSin]

18. probably but it's ok

:D

[terrya]

6. Who's gay on DU? Just for the other folks.

I know exactly who's gay. :-)

T

[LynneSin]

13. Usually those folks with rainbow flags for avatar are gay

It's a good sign!

[arwalden]

26. This Is A Give Away Too...

If you see this character... chances are pretty good that the person sporting it might be queer.

[terrya]

35. His name says it all!

BTW: LOVE the new avatar. :-)

T

[lumberingbear]

60. I'm a Butch Straight Guy!!!!

<reeks of excess hormones>

[mike_c]

8. johnny are you queer....

Johny what's the deal boy
Is your love for real boy
when the lights are low
You never hold me close
Now I saw you today boy
Walking with them gay boys
Now you hurt me so, now I gotta know
Johny are you queer?

'Cause when I see you dancing with your friends
I can't help wondering where I stand

I'm so afraid I'll lose you
If I can't seduce you
Is there something wrong?
Johny come on strong.

Why are you so weird, boy?
Johny are you queer boy?
When I make a play
You're pushing me away

'Cause when I see you dancing with your friends
I can't help wondering where I stand

Johny you've forsaken
A love you could be takin'
I want to give it to you,
But you never come through

Oh, why are you so weird, boy?
Johny are you queer boy?
When you asked for a date
I thought that you were straight.
But Johny are you queer?

Johny are you queer boy?
Johny are you queer boy?
Johny are you queer boy?

--Josie Cotton

Hey Johny.. Johny are you.. you know...

[dolo amber]

11. I have a sneaking suspicion

ronnykmarshall might be gay...can you confirm this for me? :o

[LynneSin]

we'll put some feelers out on this one

until then I would recommend the folks of DU to not allow their children to read anything posted by Ronny!

:loveya: RKM!!!

[arwalden]

24. Oh! ME ME ME ME ME!!! I Volunteer To Be A FEELER!!!

[LynneSin]

25. You seem like a straight upright guy with nothing to hide

Go find out if Ronny is gay and report back to us.

[WoodrowFan]

42. well

that's the last of Arwalden we'll be seeing for the day. :P

[arwalden]

53. Ya Big Screwball...

... funny!! :hi:

[WoodrowFan]

61. looks at watch

geeze, that didn't take very long!!! :P

[arwalden]

71. If Nothing Else... I'm Efficient.

:hi:

[ronnykmarshall]

46. Back at ya baby!

:loveya:

[dolo amber]

51. I KNEW it!

Damn I'm good...maybe this should be MY job... :D

:hi: RKM!

[Thtwudbeme]

14. LynneSin....I am sorry, but, I have to ask

Are you qualified to be the Homosexuality Detection Expert? Can you tell us about your credentials?

Were you nominated by the Toaster Committee?

[LynneSin]

16. No but I once asked NSMA if she was a Lesbian

I figured that makes me more qualified than Dobson

[Thtwudbeme]

19. omg, that's right...you did!

That was hilarious!

So, your method is to just ASK??

[LynneSin]

22. Yep, figured it's the safest best. So Thtwudbeme - are you a lesbian?

:shrug:

[Thtwudbeme]

23. Honorary Lesbian

I messed up my cover when I married Michael...but, I was still allowed to be an Honary Lesbian...and I think I might be the only one on DU.

[LynneSin]

27. I was one too until I found Jesus....

....he was missing in Aisle 3 at the Supermarket

[arwalden]

28. But Can You Find My Keys?

[LynneSin]

29. What am I, a miracle work any Jesus is busy right now

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

58. as long as you own that 4 wheel Subaru wagon anyway

[BlondieK143]

17. What if I want to turn a certain DUer straight?

He's just so damn charming. Is this possible? lol

[LynneSin]

20. Good Luck and God Speed

According to the fundies you can pray that person straight. Not sure if it works though :shrug:

Then again I was told I could pray to lose weight and the verdict is still out on that one

[BlondieK143]

30. LMAO!

:hug: You're awesome.

[Bronco69]

31. Does an affinity for men in tight Wranglers and a cowboy hat

make me gay? Whenever I see them I just get all tingly inside. :-)

[LynneSin]

32. You could also have an STD - go get that checked out by a doctor...

...there'll be no tinglyness inside in my world!!

[LDS Jock]

38. you too?

To me, a man in tight wranglers is like catnip to a cat. Irresistible.

[DS1]

33. So, are you gonna read my cards or what?

[LynneSin]

34. Did you send me any and was there money in them

:shrug:

[DS1]

36. No, I saved the money to help put it towards your bunny suit

:D

[LynneSin]

37. you mean Will's Bunny Suit

Will you be traveling with him to Philadelphia?

[DS1]

44. Travelling? We'll meet you at the airport.

Logan airport, that is :D

[LynneSin]

64. I'm sure WIll can fit you and the Bunny Suit in his car he'll be driving

down to Philadelphia. You don't mind sharing a bed with him at Ramsey's place do you?

[DS1]

68. *sigh* Of all the possible DUers I could end up in bed with

:cry:


Wait, that would require your Philly Phantasie coming true :D

[LDS Jock]

39. I don't know what is going on? What did I miss?

Dobson has a homosexuality detection expert?

[LynneSin]

43. Obviously you've skipped the Conservative Idiots list

Shame on you - bend over for a spanking

[LDS Jock]

45. I went "straight" to the forums.. I'll go check... thanks

[underpants]

40. What do you think of my "Bunny suit hunting" outfit?

A model presents a creation by British designer John Galliano during the ready-to-wear Autumn-Winter 2005-2006 collections shows in Paris(AFP/Francois Guillot)

[WoodrowFan]

41. I hate toasters

am I homophobic? Or do I just need to be exposed more to toasters??

[LynneSin]

47. Yes you do: Follow this procedure

Plug in toaster
Put fingers in toaster
Toast

Nuff said

:D

[WoodrowFan]

48. I tried that

maybe that's why I don't trust toasters, I've been burned once.

[arwalden]

49. Is Rick Astley Gay? What About Luther Vandross? Clay Aiken?

[LynneSin]

50. You're the feeler - get out there and feel ok

:P

[arwalden]

52. Girlfriend, PLEASE! I Can't Even Find My Keys!

... how am I supposed to figure out if these folks are gay?

[LynneSin]

55. Am I going to have to replace you with another feeler?

Believe me, one post in the DU lounge and your position is GONE!!!!

<<taps foot impatiently>>

[arwalden]

56. Okay Okay!

Rick Astley, possibly straight.
Luther Vandross, may be gay.
Clay Aiken, oh so gay!

[LynneSin]

69. Clay Aikens will never come out of the closet

Kinda like Newt Gingrich - that man just screams "I'm a Gay Man". Probably why he's been through so many marriages

[progmom]

54. oops!

I posted this to the wrong thread!
Damn you and your confusing tactics!

[Shananigans]

59. Am I a lesbian?

[LynneSin]

65. You could be then again....

....maybe you aren't

:shrug:

[Dookus]

62. I own a subaru wagon....

am I a lesbian?

[LynneSin]

63. Yes because only lesbians own Suburus

The fact that you are a man is quite irrelevant!

[JohnKleeb]

66. oh my lol

My mom drives a suburu and loves Ellen DeGeneres, maybe Dookus was right!

[Dookus]

67. Kleeb has two mommies!

[billyskank]

70. Is Tux the penguin gay?

He's certainly full of herring.

[LynneSin]

72. I figured if it's 2-dimensional then it's probably gay.....

...which is my argument for why Rush Limbaugh is a gay man, not that the gays want him on their team