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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 12:37 AM
Original message
We got a postcard in the mail telling us
That a high risk registered sex offender has moved within walking distance of our home. His victim was an eleven year old boy. We have shown the picture to our eleven year old son and told him to tell an adult if he sees the guy hanging around...What else do we do?
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7th_Sephiroth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 12:38 AM
Response to Original message
1. nothing
you have done all ya can
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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 12:51 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. It's just freaky....
I went to the website, and found that there are four sex offenders quite close by, one of which has had three different victims, all in my daughter's age range. We didn't get a notice about him, unless he was already here.

They felt this guy was enough of a concern to send out postacards to every resident. Scary.
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7th_Sephiroth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 12:56 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. its a scare tactic by the afraid
to rally the neighbor hood into kicking him out, it have been known to incite a scare person to kill the sex offender, and is one reason why i am a rival of the sex offender registry
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Cadence Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:02 AM
Response to Reply #4
6. You're against the sex offender registry because someone
might "victimize" the sex offender? :wtf:
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7th_Sephiroth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:04 AM
Response to Reply #6
7. it IS a modern day scarlette letter
and sex offender is a wide brush, it does go to the far range, public nudity for one can get you on the sex offender registry
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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:07 AM
Response to Reply #4
9. I've seen plenty of that on the news
People planting themselves on the lawn of the recently released guy until he goes somewhere else. I realize that they have to live somewhere, and I'm not staking a place on his lawn or anything. It really got to me because his victim was an eleven year old boy, and I HAVE an eleven year old boy.
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7th_Sephiroth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:09 AM
Response to Reply #9
11. i understand your concern
but dont let it get you too active unless he starts being seen around your son as more than a coincidence
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tjwmason Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 05:57 AM
Response to Reply #4
29. I agree
There was an attempt to get a similar system here in Britain (we have a sex-offenders register, but it's confidential with a few exceptions), and a newspaper published names and photos of people whom it believed with paedophiles. It caused several gatherings little short of pogroms, and one paediatrician got his car attacked.
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7th_Sephiroth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 12:56 PM
Response to Reply #29
32. it can get bad here in the U.S.
the cops, and anyone for that matter can use it to harass people on the list, basically the police force offenders into either suicide or they push them and push them and push them into offending again, please note that i do not condone what they did, but i think the way the registry is done currently is verry wrong
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Skip Intro Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 12:56 AM
Response to Original message
3. Was his crime detailed on the post card?
What was he convicted of?

Is there such a thing as a "low risk" sex offender?

I mean???

By all means, keep your kid safe as if the worst were true. You don't have any other choice.

But there are victims of vicious prosecutors too.

Why did they let him out if he's a risk to children?

I'd want to know what the nature of the crime was. What, exactly was he accused of. What was his side of the story. I'd really want to know that.



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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:00 AM
Response to Reply #3
5. Aggrevated Sexual Assualt of a Child
He's on probation...love that Texas prison system! The website didn't give much more info.

What really worries me is this...We live in a trailer park with a little store at the front. The store parking lot is where the kids go to wait for the bus in the morning. There are plenty of parents around that drive their kids to the bus stop and stand around until the bus comes. this guy could blend in, looking like somebody's dad. Also, he could just drop by the store every morning for a cup of coffee, while he scopes out his next victim. I'm looking for more info on his original conviction.
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7th_Sephiroth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:05 AM
Response to Reply #5
8. paroled no doubt
to make foom for those evil pot smokers
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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:07 AM
Response to Reply #8
10. I'm sure...too bad they aren't making room for Tom DeLay
Or those Enron fuckers.
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7th_Sephiroth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:09 AM
Response to Reply #10
12. i heard the cemetary
is doing the preparations
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:31 AM
Response to Original message
13. your kid should be apprised of all dangers, period
they exist whether or not you receive a f***ing postcard
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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:33 AM
Response to Reply #13
15. Both of my kids know the drill about not talking to strangers
It's not like I was sitting around thinking the world around me was cozy. Just to know that someone that the state considers a "high risk sexual offender" lives less than five minutes from house has my cage rattled.
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:34 AM
Response to Reply #15
16. half the time when you ask a kid what a stranger is they cannot tell you
also, most dangers come from people they know
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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:39 AM
Response to Reply #16
17. I am aware of this as well.
Just last week they ran a program at my daughter's school about good touches and bad touches, by anyone, not just strangers. My daughter wants everyone to be her friend, and she worries me to death. My son is the exact opposite. He knows what a stranger is, no question, and has no time of day for them. He's an Aspie, so he doesn't want anybody touching him, anywhere, for any reason. If somebody does touch him, they've just asked for a full blown meltdown.
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Skittles Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:44 AM
Response to Reply #17
20. best advice to give
tell them if they ever, EVER feel UNCOMFORTABLE in ANY SITUATION, GET OUT OF IT IMMEDIATELY. Walk away. It's been shown over and over that so many people sense somthing is not right but don't leave for fear of being "rude". Tell them if they EVER feel funny to LEAVE!!!
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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:47 AM
Response to Reply #20
21. I don't have to tell my Aspie son that, but I have
He leaves any situation that he doesn't like. Both kids have had the talk about what to do if someone is trying to make you do something that you don't want to do. They know to get away, they know to scream and yell.
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:07 PM
Response to Reply #17
33. Can I just interject something here?
The Good touch, bad touch program doesn't work. The main reason is that bad touch often doesn't feel 'bad'. Get the book by Ken Wooden called "Child Lures" and the one by Gavin DeBecker called "Protecting the Gift". Read them. You won't believe the information in these books that you already know, but have yet to implement.

I am a firm believer in the notification system, just because parents like you (and me) deserve to know if there is a threat to their child among their neighbors.
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 02:02 AM
Response to Reply #16
24. Sadly this is true...
We warn kids about Chester Molester with the lost puppy when 9 times out of 10 it's Uncle Bob or neighbor Gene we have to worry about. Sick fucking world.
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The_Casual_Observer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:32 AM
Response to Original message
14. In the "good old days" nobody would know about the guy.
particularly if he was a priest. The certain knowledge probably makes you 100% safer than the way it used to be.
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DemBones DemBones Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:41 AM
Response to Reply #14
18. The only kids I ever knew who were molested

were victims of an older brother or cousin, not a stranger.
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The_Casual_Observer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:43 AM
Response to Reply #18
19. The guy in question molested somebody, was it a relative?.
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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:49 AM
Response to Reply #19
22. I don't know
I can't seem to find any details other than what the sex offender website has to offer.
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 01:58 AM
Response to Original message
23. martial arts training?
Martial arts is a great physical release, teaches discipline and honor, and most importantly - self defense. Can't hurt.

Is there a way to research the case? If it were me, I would want to know the name and phone number of his probation officer. If the card says "high risk" and the victim was the same gender and age as your child, then obviously you want to keep your child as safe as humanely possible. There's nothing wrong with that.

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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 02:03 AM
Response to Reply #23
25. I've been trying to find more details, no luck
I can call Austin tomorrow and see what they'll tell me.

My son took karate for a while, but wouldn't stop using it on his sister. He has very little impulse control, so we switched to soccer. I don't worry that he can't defend himself. More than once, I've seen him go off on an adult, kicking, biting, hitting, screaming. More than once, that adult has been me. That's one reason why there's a therapist in the picture. Things have calmed down a lot for him lately, but I know he'd have no problem letting loose if somebody messed with him.
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 02:23 AM
Response to Reply #25
26. I'm in Austin too....
I'm dead serious about this...PM if you want research help. I'm a parent too, I would want to know the details.

As far as the karate goes, I didn't realize there was a sister in the picture. I have a friend with both a son and daughter who are both in karate and they are great in class, but the second they get home, they're beating each other up. Actually, the girl is titanium tough so she actually does most of the damage.

I digress. Having a therapist in the picture is a godsend. I don't know how often your son sees a therapist, but if it's regular and continues indefinitely, then tell the therapist the situation and if s/he notices any differences, then s/he is fully prepared. If the sessions aren't regular enough to detect a problem, the therapist should tell you the signs to look for or, at the very least, refer you to someone who can.

Between the research of the abuser, education of your son, and advice from a child therapist, hopefully you will feel as prepared as you could be in this type of situation.
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SKKY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 02:23 AM
Response to Original message
27. You can do what I did...
...get your significant other into some sort of self-defense class, and teach her to use mace/tazer/etc. It would be nice if you didn't have to do this, but unfortunately our reality in SOCAL is not exactly nice. The fact is, she may have to defend herself when I'm not around.
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Enquiringkitty Donating Member (721 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 04:41 AM
Response to Original message
28. Do You Already Have a Neighborhood Watch Program in Place?
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freebird04 Donating Member (25 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 08:07 AM
Response to Original message
30. Is he a ...
Catholic priest by any chance?
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movie_girl99 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Feb-01-05 08:15 AM
Response to Original message
31. that's scary
i check the sex offender website for my area often and OMG they're everywhere.
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