How do I get the woman of my dreams to come and visit me?

[Murphys_Unlawful]

I have tried everything with little luck. :cry:

[NewJeffCT]

1. well, try to pay her more than her usual hourly rate...

Just kidding...

But, I would suggest starting slowly before you get into visiting.

[Murphys_Unlawful]

2. But the visit might help to decide what happens in the future.

[fit4life]

3. Do you have a van & some chloroform?

Sorry, couldn't resist. :)

[Murphys_Unlawful]

5. Yeah, and I don't think that will win her love.

[fit4life]

41. Oh, you want her to love you.

Damn, I guess that rules out kidnapping a loved one too, huh? ;)

[bahrbearian]

4. Go back to sleep.

[Murphys_Unlawful]

6. Does anyone have advice that would help?

[jswordy]

7. Why don't you visit her?

Unless they won't let you have a pass to leave on your own recognizance.

[NewJeffCT]

8. Do you know her already?

some details would help...

[Murphys_Unlawful]

14. Yes, I know her.

[NewJeffCT]

19. for a guy desparate to meet her

You don't give us much details...

does she know your name or that you exist?
do you talk frequently?
Have you gone out at all?
have you even met her for coffee or tea yet?
is she single?

[Murphys_Unlawful]

20. Ask questions.....

does she know your name or that you exist? Yes
do you talk frequently? Somewhat
Have you gone out at all? No
have you even met her for coffee or tea yet? No
is she single? Yes

[NewJeffCT]

22. is coffee or tea something you could do?

Start small & work up from there. Ask her if you could meet her for coffee or tea... or, if you work together, ask her to go with you when you go for coffee or tea.

[Murphys_Unlawful]

24. I S'pose I could.

[kmla]

9. Well, for an appearance fee, Angelina Jolie CAN come visit you...

Oh - wait.

That's the woman of MY dreams.

Sorry. My bad.

[Murphys_Unlawful]

15. S'ok.

[SarahB]

10. I am not the one to ask here.

Or maybe I'm just the person to ask. I'm not sure.

Speaking as an alleged dream woman for a very, very long time who finally made the decision to do so who has been met with one big, silent ? in the last couple weeks.

I'd say I came to the decision anyway because of time (over a year), effort, mutual understanding, mutual respect of our space and situations, current life circumstances now being in a place where it's possible, and people I respect immensely having also met the person and saying good things. I don't know what will happen (or not) given various circumstances not under my control (perhaps not even under his at this point), but I can honestly say my relationship with this person made me understand myself more and simply be a stronger person. Maybe that's all it's supposed to be. It's hard to know sometimes and it is difficult not to feel a great tragedy in a loss of a love not able to be fulfilled.

[nini]

11. :-(

I know I don't know exactly what is going on but this makes me sad to see you are in limbo over a relationship you have been waiting for. From your posts I know you've had many life altering events the last couple months that have been difficult to get through and you're ready for some peace and happiness in your life.

Giving someone time to sort out things is ok but don't forget what is fair to YOU too - I know this is easy to say and harder to do when we care about someone and are understanding of their fears etc... It's a tough to balance the needs of another and your own, and I understand your frustration and pain. I hope it all works out for the best for you and can finally find that peace in your life you deserve :hug:

[SarahB]

13. Exactly

Part of it all may be having to have the strength to "let go" if I must. I've been through a lot in life though and frankly, I'm not looking forward to one more lesson or loss either. It's up to him him and he knows I can't wait forever. It's time for him to grab the brass ring very soon or spend who knows how long regretting what could have been. Even my ex tells me, "If this guy lets you go, he's nuts" which I think says something about the kind of person I am. In the weeks to come, he has to decide I suppose if I'm his 'curse' or perhaps at last, a bit of his Karma. I don't give my heart easily, but I did. If I have to move on, I'm sure eventually I can again. Just a little more wise and weary for it all I suppose.

[nini]

23. I don't give my heart easily either..

actually I didn't think I ever could again but did. If anything the fact you did shows you have not let all the hurts you've had keep you from being able to allow a relationship to flourish when it comes along.

I'll be pulling for the best for you.

[Murphys_Unlawful]

18. Thank you!

[Murphys_Unlawful]

16. Thank you.

[RetroLounge]

12. Offer to introduce her to me...

:D

RL

[Murphys_Unlawful]

17. Absolutely not.

[tigereye]

21. maybe you need to ask her for coffee first

wherever you happen to be. If that involves travel for her, so be it.

:)

[MsAnthropy]

25. Send me an airline ticket

[Murphys_Unlawful]

26. For what?

[MsAnthropy]

29. So the woman of your dreams can come and visit you!

[Murphys_Unlawful]

32. Where should I send it to?

[MsAnthropy]

36. The Minnesota Home for Wayward Girls

[Murphys_Unlawful]

37. Hey now. How long you wanna visit?

[JimmyJazz]

27. No - me! Send me an airline ticket!

:)

[Murphys_Unlawful]

28. I'll send you one to the moon!

[RPM]

30. tip her better

n/t

[Murphys_Unlawful]

33. She's not a dancer. Well, I don't think so.

[Murphys_Unlawful]

35. She did say she liked to dance though.

[CJCRANE]

31. Ask her if she wants to see...

your etchings.

(BTW that's just an old British cliche, like asking "do you come here often?" if you meet some-one in a bar).

[Murphys_Unlawful]

34. That's a good one.

[Bat Boy]

38. Find out what she likes to eat...

Then leave a small trail of it to a secluded area.

Okay, you're gonna need a length of rope. About 50 ft should do it. You'll also need a sock and a bar of soap.

Make a noose and leave it on the ground around the largest bit of food. When she gets to that one, let her settle in a bit. You don't want to spring the trap too fast. Let her get comfortable, then suddenly yank on the other end. If you've done it right the noose should tighten around her ankles.

Then run up to her and hit her over the head with the bar of soap stuffed into the sock.

Works like a charm.

'Course they're a bit cranky when they wake up...

[Murphys_Unlawful]

39. I gotta try this one.

[jeanarrett]

40. so f***ing funny! I'm laughing out loud at work. . .