Post something funny

[jpgray]

I always look for a woman who has a tattoo. I see a woman with a tattoo, and I’m thinking, okay, here’s a gal who’s capable of making a decision she’ll regret in the future. (Richard Jeni)

[trumad]

1. Patriots dynasty..

[mike_c]

2. something funny....

Someone had to say it.

[givemebackmycountry]

3. HERE YOU GO! Funny AND sad.

[GOPFighter]

4. So this cat...

......wearing a cowboy hat, a gun, and a missing foot walks into a bar.

He saunters up to the bartender and says, "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw!"

[SarahB]

5. ok

Mickey and Minnie Mouse are in divorce court, and the judge says to Mickey "Let me get this straight, you want a divorce because she is crazy?"

"No, your honor," replies Mickey " I said she is f***ing Goofy"

[Roland99]

6. No.

;)

[jpgray]

7. One from the late Rodney Dangerfield

I went to the psychiatrist, and he says "You're crazy " I tell him I want a second opinion. He says, "Okay, you're ugly too!"

[Magrittes Pipe]

8. I'd like to punch jpgray in the crotch.

Oh, sorry. I guess that's not funny. But it would be if I videotaped it.

[Wickerman]

9. leftover from Valentine's Day

You have two choices in life: You can stay single and be miserable, or get married and wish you were dead.

At a cocktail party, one woman said to another, "Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?" The other women replied, "Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."

A lady inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Husband wanted." Next day she received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."

When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in the USA The rest cheat in Canada.

A woman is incomplete until she is married.... Then she is finished.

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" And the father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

Young son: "Is it true Dad that in some parts of Africa a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?" Dad: "That happens in every country, son."

Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

You know the honeymoon is pretty much over when you start to go out with the boys on Wednesday nights, and so does she.

Husband: "Want a quickie?"
Wife: "As opposed to what?"

First guy: "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are attractive to the opposite sex.

[jpgray]

10. One from Jon Stewart

I celebrated Thanksgiving the old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.

[MissMillie]

11. A naked woman walks into a bar w/ a poodle under her arm....

.... and the bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"