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I boiled the water and threw the macaronis in. I stirred occasionally, just as directed.
But after I stirred there was a macaroni that had slithered up one of the tongs of the fork with which I was stirring.
I beat the fork on the edge of the pan to put the macaroni back in the water but it just clinged to the utensil. I wiped the fork on the edge of the sauce pan and the prissy pasta fell out onto the stove top, rolling underneath the pan onto the burner. “Bastard,” I screamed.
I removed the pan from the burner, stabbed the macaroni with the fork and picked it up.
It looked at me with very sad eyes, saying, “I’m sorry, sir. I’ll report myself to the MPs (Macaroni Police)." I softened.
I replied, “Negative, crafty one. I’m gonna make a Macaroni out of you. Fall in!”
He was relieved and exclaimed, “Thank you, sir,” and jumped back into the boiling water.
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