Internet Dating services...anyone try them?

[Longgrain]

I'm not normally the kind of person to do this sort of thing, but I'm starting to kind of get desperate. I'm aware of a lot of weirdos that there are on line, but I'm guessing there are a lot of normal people too.

So I guess what I'm asking is, which sites are best, which should I trust, how should I approach this, and so on...

So far the only one I have my profile up on is Democratic Singles Network, but it doesn't look like there's anyone on there near me...:shrug:

[physioex]

1. It's quite possible....

I have know some nice girls who told me they put their profiles on the net and met their boyfriends that way. I can't tell you what sites to use (as I don't know much about these things), but give it a try...

[WindRavenX]

2. Well, Match.com sucked for me

Democraticsingles.net worked out great for me- but that before there was a fee.

[Longgrain]

12. Yeah, I think you were the one who first recommended it to me...

It's just there is no one on there who's geographical close to me?

The nearest match I found was about 25 miles away. I'd hate to drive that far just to meet someone than find out we're incompatible...

[WindRavenX]

16. well..don't rule out distance automatically

I disagree with the person who said anyone more than 50 miles away should be disregarded. If it's a convenient commute, I would go up to 2 hours away (which is what I do)- and I don't have a car. I just take the Concord trailways bus to Portland,ME.
Spend a LOT of time talking to that person online, and then talk on the phone...it pays off...and if you like that person, distance shouldn't be a problem if you decide to :hi:
Don't worry Longgrain, I know there's a chicka out there for you!

[Longgrain]

20. Thanks WRX, there is actually a girl at work I've been talking to

right now it's just "We're friends" type stuff, but lately it seems she's been dropping 'hints', or at least that's how I read it. I am seriously considering asking her out for coffee or dinner sometime, once I find out more about her...I'm just weighing my options right now...:hi:

[WindRavenX]

21. cool beans!

Keep me updated yo!
And coffee dates ROCK for first dates- coz you can modify your schedule if you want to during the date.

[Longgrain]

24. She said she wanted to read the book I wrote...

Once she Emails me, I'm going to send her a ton of links to DU of all my paintings, photographs and writings. The other day she was telling me she loved Salvidor Dali, and asking me all these questions about my paintings...

I'll be sure to let all of you guys know if anything comes of it...

[MADem]

82. Bring her a snack!!!!

Who doesn't love a midmorning or midafternoon snack??? Then invite her to lunch! Keep it light, take it slow.

If you think she is hinting, you are probably right. Get in the game, lad!

[RC]

28. I met someone 3980 miles away

We've been e-mailing and phone calls back and forth for over 2 years. Leaving at the end of the month for another visit. I get to spend a whole month in Hawaii with my friend! :hug: :loveya:

25 miles? Come on, that's right next door.

[dorktv]

3. *asks you out on a date* does this count?

[Longgrain]

13. Sure, but I see you are in AZ, I'm in New England...

If we schedule such a date, will you mail me the airfare?

[dorktv]

14. Um sure when I get a job.

[EmperorHasNoClothes]

4. It's how I met my wife

We know several other couples who met that way, too.

[HeeBGBz]

5. I was on Dem Singles too until it started costing money.

My profile is probably still there.

No, I didn't have any luck. One person wanted to meet me, but I chickened out.

Talked myself out of it..

[Freebird12004]

6. I tried several

Distance seems to be the biggest problem unless you live near a large city.

It's fairly easy to weed out the weirdos - if you don't rush that first date.

What happened with the woman at work that you mentioned last week?

[Longgrain]

15. I'm still talking to her, still trying to find out if she's seeing anybody

I did give her my e-mail address, but she hasn't contacted me yet...

If I had hers, maybe I'd contact her first...

[Freebird12004]

75. coffee dates

are the best place to start.

So "ask the lovely lady out for a simple cup of coffee".

[sendero]

7. It works just like meatspace..

... only better. Use your head. If you strike up an interest in someone, exchange emails for a while. Then graduate to the phone. Do several hours of phone and if that is good, meet.

I'm always hearing horror stories about such things on radio or tv. It usually goes like this:

1) guy meets girl online, in another state (don't waste your time engaging with prospects more than 50 miles away)

2) guy, based on nothing more than 1000 emails and a picture of dubious origin, quits his job, packs up and moves to bumfuck to be with his newly beloved

3) relationship lasts 2 weeks, guy is out of a job and disheartened

What is the lesson here? Guy is a moron. Do it right and find the perfect mate - I did, and I had a lot of fun along the way :)

[MADem]

8. Maybe you should try...

...going to democratic/progressive meetings, rallies, demonstrations, and so forth. That way you'll be able to size people up, see if there is a "connection." Also, you can put the word out that you are looking--don't always discount the "fix up" especially if you trust the person doing the fixing up.

You could also try speed dating. I understand that is a good way of just getting back into the game--you pay a fee, you meet 12 to 20 potential partners, you talk to each one for ten or fifteen minutes, and then it is on to the next. You grade each one, and say whether or not you find them to your liking. Then, if it works out that both like each other, you get a phone number to call and follow up.

I actually know a person who met their spouse online. Of course, they have six or seven failed marriages between them, and I'm not so sure all is well with that relationship this time either. But I'm an old fart, I'm not up on all this newfangled stuff.

I understand that e-harmony is owned by a rightwing nut, who doesn't like to mix them there races. For that reason alone I would avoid that one. SNL did a good skit on it, with the characters being mirror images of each other (i.e., the comedians played both the male and female roles). It was pretty damn funny!

[Kat45]

61. That is NOT TRUE about eharmony and mixing the races.

I'm a white woman, and eharmony has matched me up with several black men. Yes, the site was started by/is owned by a conservative Christian guy, but with all the advertising that they've been doing, I'd say the site has expanded way beyond that. Most of the profiles I've seen don't even mention their religion. And as I said, they have matched me with black men. (Nothing has gone anywhere with either the black or white men, mainly because of long distances, but sometimes because of no interest.)

In the stuff you fill out to go on eharmony, one of the questions asks you if you have a preference on such things as race, religion, distance from you, etc. I just answered that any race or religion was fine.

[fudge stripe cookays]

9. reprehensor and I...

met through personalpossibilities.com (think they're defunct now), but we've been married almost 5 years now.

Worked great for us! :D
FSC

[Bok_Tukalo]

10. I've had success of a sorts

in that I now have a social life and it is through Internet dating sites. Both Yahoo and Matchmaker.

But I have quit them. I originally thought that I would benefit and meet someone I was able to connect with because there was that "weeding out" process of reading the profile but I since have re-evaluted after several dates and realized that every relationship I have ever had that was worth it happened through random chance and you simply cannot force a random event.

But if you just want to get the fuck out of the house and spend some time with someone (Christ! Anyone!) then it is a good method. But like I told you before, there are many more men than women available and you have to be the aggressor in most cases and initiate the conversation.

[Longgrain]

17. You advise has been taken to heart...tho there's not much to choose from

where I am. I did look into Yahoo once, and there seemed to be several people in my area, maybe I'll check it out again, and see what I get.

[Bok_Tukalo]

25. I'm souring on the whole thing

I find the Internet interesting in that it has become the 21st Century Pub; a gathering place where so many can interact, game, debate, be informed, and spark conversation but I find it also somehow unfortunate that we have been forced into our insular nooks facing a screen to weed out the attached, the unattractive, the dangerous, and the uninteresting before even saying "hello."

Perhaps it is an indication of our limited time and energy, and our exhausted circle of friends and family, that we go to dating sites in order to try and connect with someone in a meaningful way in the larger world that runs through that wire into our homes. Granted, it does have so many benefits, but I can't help thinking that it is a sea change in our cultural dating process where we usually stumble through one learning experience after another until random chance grabs us in the least expected place and at the least expected time, providing us with a relationship that alters our world and how we perceive our place in it on a fundamental level.

It's just too difficult to say "this is me" with a few pictures, a short paragraph, and a limited list of answers chosen from a set of questions someone other than yourself thought was the important, vital information that everyone needed up front to limit their search; automatically disqualifying so many looking for that perfect individual to compliment and enrich themselves emotionally when we cannot possibly see how someone outside those criteria might in fact be able to fill the need we obviously have. I think that maybe I am too cynical to understand how some device used to order books, get movie show times, and check the weekend weather prior to a road trip can be used to find an individual made-to-order with which to connect.

[ashmanonar]

47. yea, i have a similar problem by me..

considering i live in a dorm, it's odd...but i swear, EVERY GIRL here is attached. there's a school 2 hours away, with like 90% guys, so they poach on our territory.

it sucks.

[KG]

11. hasn't worked out in long-term romance dept

but i have met serveral woman who are now good freinds of mine.

[kwassa]

18. I met my wife online

We met ten years ago, got together nine years ago, married six years ago.

This was back in Usenet days, pre World Wide Web.

and she was on one coast, and I on the other.

There were no dating sites and no chat rooms. No pictures, either. Simply Unix newsreaders. It went from email to phone calls to visits to moving.

[AlienGirl]

19. eHarmony told me there was no one weird enough for me

So I used DU, and met everythingsxen instead. :bounce: He's plenty weird!

Tucker

[Longgrain]

22. I've meet a lot of people here at DU who have told me that

I'd be perfect for them, or that they had an internet crush on me, unfortunately I'm nowhere near any of these people, and I'm no where near a major city.

I bet there's a DUer of two right now who's perfectly compatible with me, but they usually end up living on the other side of the country. :shrug:

[dorktv]

26. Are you able to move at all?

[Longgrain]

30. Not right now...I have an unemployed brother and an

unemployed father that I'm helping support. Of course if I met a single woman I liked who was living alone, and it got to the point where she wanted me to move in, I'd do it. But right now I'm a long ways off from that!

[dorktv]

33. Darn.

Well one of these weeks I might have enough to have you come to AZ. But I warn you...we have a lot of rightwingers.

[AlienGirl]

38. Everythingsxen moved to Seattle from Florida. n/t

[Philosophy]

70. They told me the same thing

And they're probably right.

[hfojvt]

23. I found it to be a waste of time and money

Maybe that is just me. Most of the women I chose to write to, did not bother to respond. Others I exchanged a few emails with and then they wanted to see a picture, and that was that. If there is anything worse than being rejected, it has to be spending $30 a month to be rejected (and rejected and rejected and rejected, but hey, who is counting.) Bleah, bleah, bleah. Besides that I am so old I can remember when rejections were 3 for 25 cents.

[Longgrain]

27. I have no problem showing my picture on-line

So that would be the first thing they'd see.

Plus I posted the text of my profile at DSN here before and got a lot of positive responses (tho mostly from married women x( ), so I still have some confidence about how it might work out.

[Glenda]

29. If you want to try it out, you can go to craigslist where it's free

I have no idea how successful people are there.

I tend to get jobs from craigslist.

http://boston.craigslist.org/

[Longgrain]

31. Never heard of it?

What's the address craigslist.com?

[Glenda]

32. Hee hee! I just edited the previous message...

with the URL:

http://boston.craigslist.org/

[Digit]

66. Looked for grins and giggles and someone was looking for suicide girl.

I looked for jobs first and the job postings were scarce.

The posting for suicide girl tho, turned me off from this list I think for good.
Sick.

[SarahB]

34. Give it a try.

I hear it's tougher for men than women. I don't know what I'd do. I've thought about something like this, but it's not really me. The only thing I'd probably consider is something like Democratic Singles. I seem to meet a lot of potential people, just no one I click with enough to pursue. Then again, I just became available again after a long time off the market and certainly in no hurry or place for a major relationship again. My only internet experience wasn't sought out and still a little confusing. I don't hold it as impossible to meet someone online, but at this point in my life, I would want to move forward with it quickly to fill in the blanks that exist with internet relationships. I'm not much for mystery these days.

[Longgrain]

36. I tend to be pretty open and honest on the internet...

So no problem there for me.

Of course I'd rather meet people face to face and just "let it happen" but so far it hasn't happened for me... Judging from some of the replies I've gotten, the answer seems to be "Go for it, but be careful."

Plus I can understand why it must be easier for a woman than a man. If that's the case, a may need to be more aggressive. I'm still not sure, but thanks for the input...:hi:

[RagingInMiami]

35. I've done internet dating in several states I've lived in

And always managed to meet nice girls. Nothing permanent resulted from it, but I did date quite a few of them and I had no complaints.
Until I got to Miami and tried it.
Girls out here are the most shallow, superficial and materialistic women in the country.
If you're not at least 6-feet tall and make over $75,000, you won't get a response. And that's from women who are 5'3" who have office clerical jobs.
The most common description from these women is: "I spend all my free time working out, but when I'm not at the gym, I like fine dining and traveling."

[Longgrain]

37. Wow pretty bad Raging, where I'm from

in North Central Mass, the women tend to be rather shallow too, tho in somewhat of a different way. They all seem to want the caveman type who going to do nothing but push them around, plus they tend to sleep around a lot up here, and not a lot of educated types.

I need a woman who's at least on my level of education and and is serious of at least having a meaningful romance (and of course an appreciation for the arts is also a welcomed bonus...)

[secular_warrior]

65. Exactly ! They could be like some 'plain jane' and only want

'the Bachelor'. And they have an attitude about it ! Lol.

And what I've observed is the guy's looks don't have that much to do with it. It's money and job status - they want a professional - a doctor, a lawyer, a CEO. I've seen some short, ugly rich guys land some very hot women, with very little effort.

Most women today are not about equality - if they make x amount of dollars, the man has to make much more than x. Even so-called independent women, who make a lot of money, want a man who makes much more than they do - never the same - or god forbid less.

[HeeBGBz]

39. When I go on my fear and loathing trip

Maybe I'll stop by and say howdy.

[Longgrain]

41. Go for it, there's suppose to be a big DU meeting in Boston soon.

Who knows, maybe I'll met someone there. ;-)

[HeeBGBz]

48. How soon?

My trip is still in the pipe dream stages.

[Longgrain]

49. Think there's one in March and one in April...

It looks huge...

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x2631052

[HeeBGBz]

73. Crap, I'll never make those

Maybe if they have one in the summer sometime.

[all.of.me]

40. i tried it several years ago...

...and what i found was that people don't portray themselves very well (the men, anyway - i wasn't looking for women). when i talked on the phone with people or met them, it was very different than what was in an email. it was nothing like how they came across with words. i also found that the men were scared to death of intimacy and afraid to go beyond email! so why then be on a dating site?!?!

i've also met some men through writing and photography websites. same thing - they were much different in person than in email. but i suppose i seemed that way, too, to them.

the sites you had to pay for had better quality people on it.

there are some success stories, though! maybe you will be one!

[secular_warrior]

42. Stick a hundred dollar bill to your head,

and go outside..

Unfortunately, that's what the ladies want (even though they won't admit it). Yes, even 'liberal' women (some would say, especially liberal women, who tend to be culturally.. shall we say..elite).

Women have become worst than men, IMO, in terms of superficiality.
It's all about what schooling/job/money you have - not about you.

Look at that beautiful woman that disgusting old capitalist Donald Trump just bagged.

We live in a very sad world.

[SarahB]

46. Wrong!

I'd want an intelligent man who had enough drive not to sit around the house eating Cheetos all day, but there's plenty of men who may have not-so-much money (student loans, career change, divorce, whatever) and be a quality person. Then again, I already did the have-kids-get-taken-care-of-thing. Highly overrated (and he was as poor as can be when we first moved in together). Some women (otherwise hot and intelligent women I might add) see beyond that stuff and see someone on deeper levels. It seems like men judge themselves more because of that stuff than I ever have.

[secular_warrior]

64. I don't know - maybe you're not - but most women today are.

I'm a fairly young guy. Never married. I have a pretty good job.

I've dated many different types of women. And they all have one thing in common - secretly, they love men with lots of money even if he is a jerk, the same way, deep down, most of my friends love women with hot looks and a hot body - even if the woman is a jerk.

I am able to get the dates, but have a hard time going beyond that. My left wing/anti-capitalist views turn off most women, who are hoping to hit paydirt when they go out with me (because I come across as having money, for some reason, I've been told). They turn me off too, when I realize they are money hungry sharks.

I've developed a real cynical attitude towards women - one day I'll come across one who isn't a gold-digger.

And it isn't my looks or personality that is the problem - they love me before they find out about my views.

I just think that women's lib has produced the opposite of the type of woman it should have. Before we had only one gender of greedy, narcissitic, capitalist pigs. Now we have another. Yes - even the so called 'liberal' women, who in many respects are even worse - they are very upwardly mobile and will not accept a man 'below' them in social/job status.

With women today, IMO, it's a trend among them to find the richest guy and take advantage of him - to them that's some type of empowerment. The whole Sex and the City attitude (who, btw, are supposed to be a group of ultra-hip, 'liberal' women).

Then when they wind up with rich playboys who discard them after their breasts start to droop, they are complaining and expect everyone to feel sorry for them.

[SarahB]

76. I don't know.

Sounds like you're better off without those shallow types of women. People of substance are few and far between and I think when you're younger, it's even harder. I don't think the Feminist movement can be blamed for the actions of petty, superficial women however. That's not what it was about.

I've had the opposite problem. I tend to get hit on by shallow, jerky men who think I'd be impressed by their stuff and because they think I'm cute. Generally, once I open my mouth and my nerdier self comes out (I mean that in no way holding contempt for intellectualism, but a sort of celebration of my nerdiness), they realize I'm not what they'd want (or vice versa). I seem to scare away and otherwise freak out the more quiet, brainy types I actually like for reasons unknown.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

50. Wrong!

The man I would currently like to get together with (not likely, but he is my current crush) is shorter than I am, has an interesting rather than a handsome face, and makes about the same amount of money as I do.

So what's the attraction? He's really, really smart with a wide-ranging intellect, has an offbeat sense of humor, has many of the same beliefs and interests that I do, and is a real sweetheart.

There's a difference between being culturally elite and being rich. It can cost less to attend a classical concert than a rock concert, and an intelligent book or magazine costs no more than a stupid one.

SarahBelle is right. Men often give themselves negative self-assessments based on what they see in the mass media.

Back in grad school I knew a fellow with the most beautiful twinkly blue eyes and thick red hair I've ever seen. He was also tall and thin and very sweet. One day, he had to leave for a job interview in New York right after lunch, so he walked into the cafeteria wearing a three-piece suit. He didn't look movie star handsome, but he looked striking in an unconventional wayl, and the women I was having lunch with (who didn't know him) all oohed and ahhed.

Later, I told him how my women friends had reacted, and he thought I was making fun of him. Some girl back in high school had told him he was weird looking, and he still believed it ten years later and was convinced that no woman would ever want him. This belief prevented him from seeing all the women who started drooling when he walked into a room.

[RagingInMiami]

52. Wrong!

A single one-hundred dollar bill is not going to do it.
A thousand dollar bill and maybe you might get lucky.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

54. Well, if you want to attract airheaded gold diggers, what can I say?

:shrug:

[RagingInMiami]

55. I don't want to attract gold diggers

But all the single women in my age group in the area I live in all tend to be that way.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

58. Then you're going after the wrong single women or looking in the

wrong places.

Go to places that you are interested in that aren't classic "boy meets girl" situations.

Every relationship I've been in was either the result of being thrown together in a common situation (school, leisure activities) or the result of some clever and subtle matchmaking by friends.

[ProgressiveConn]

56. Its biological but...

It may very well be that women have an innate attraction to those who can provide for their offspring regardless of their intent to have children. Then again its no different than a man who wishes to have an attractive wife. Both are superficial in their own way but neither can be really blamed for that impulse.

[Philosophy]

72. Tell me about it

I was dating this girl regularly for a couple of months recently - we were perfect for each other: we had almost all the same interests, political views, taste in music, etc. I was really starting to fall in love.

Then suddenly this old friend she she used to know a little bit years ago comes back into town and calls her up and informs her that he just finished vet school and he is planning on getting a job in New York City. She has always dreamed of trying to "make it" in NYC, and he somehow conviced her that veterarians make a lot of money (even though he is unemployed now and is having a little bit of difficulty get licensed in NY since he went to some cracker jack Carribean island vet school), and she totally swooned over that. So she dropped me cold and is planning to run off with him to NY (assume he can make it there) within a couple weeks.

IMHO I'm better looking than he is (he reminds me of a slightly overweight young Bill Murray, and acts like him too, oddly enough), for the moment richer (I make decent money as a computer programmer), and far more compatible with this girl as far as I can figure. And all he had to do is promise her a trip to NYC and future riches. How superficial is that?

[Blue_Tires]

43. i tried yahoo with mixed results

ironically, AOL worked best for me, back in the dark ages (late 90s)...stay away from match.com...it sucks--hard!

you could also try something like nerve.com or look up speed dating in your area

[steve2470]

44. my best luck has been with eharmony.com nt

[serryjw]

51. I've been on eharmoney for 3 months

and absolutley not success. It's worked well for you?

[Kat45]

57. I'm also on eharmony. They've matched me with a number of

men, but most of them live too far away for either of us to want to bother. I actually got to the phone call level with one guy, then he decided to take a break from dating (which was ok because I couldn't see it going anywhere anyway.

[serryjw]

63. I live in a red state

(DENVER)and I'm 55. I KNOW what I want and the format is a waste of time for me......All I get sent are republican that way more athletic than I am.. I have much better luck on the other sites, BUT no 'late partner' yet'

[steve2470]

60. in terms of quality of responses, yes. My "dream woman" is the

one I am now dating, and I found her there :-)

[xmas74]

45. match.com sucked

so did yahoo. I gave up.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

53. Last summer, I thought I had met my soul mate online

He was in another state, and as we corresponded, it was as if I had encountered my psychological twin. It was quite uncanny--and I'm not imagining it. There were so many parallels in our lives.

We met after about three weeks, and it was quite a letdown. We'd been pouring our hearts out in correspondence and seen each other's photos, but in person, there was no chemistry whatsoever. None. Zip. Zero. I showed him around Minneapolis, but it was as if we were good buddies, and our correspondence faded out after the visit.

I also experienced speed dating once after someone gave me a free ticket. I met seven age-appropriate men, but they all seemed like Typical American Suburban Guys, a type that does not appeal to me at all.

[liberalhistorian]

59. Whatsa matter LG,

am I not good enough for you anymore? Did I not show enough appreciation for your fireplace? :evilgrin: :bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

Frankly, I'd say forget about them. Unless you're a supermodel or have a fat wallet, they're a complete waste of time. Not to mention a major ego-buster, since a lot of the time people you're interested in won't even bother to reply or will just delete your initial email without even checking out your profile at length. Big waste of time, energy and money as far as I'm concerned.

[Longgrain]

62. I know, but you're in OH I'm in MA....

And never the twain shall meet...

Seriously, I'm still a newbie at this internet thing, so I'm just interested into what other people experiences have been, and should I try it?

[RagingInMiami]

67. Of course you should try it

I just spent 29 dollars for a month at match.com. You can join for longer and get a cheaper monthly rate, but I gave it a month to see what happens.
The way I see it, I spend that much in a weekend anyway, going to a bar and trying to meet women.
So now that I paid that, I'm trying to write to as many women that I think might be compatible with me. I haven't had any luck yet and if I end up with no date at the end of the month, I will just say fuck it and tell myself that at least I tried.
But there are many women you can write to, women that you will never speak with if you were not on that site. So I say go for it, just don't go in there with high expectations. That way, if you don't meet anybody, you'll be like whatever, but if you, you'll be pleasantly surprised.

[libodem]

68. I've never tried any of those sites

you guys are the first and only people I've ever talked to..Although the other night, when I was logging off, a pop-up came up, about taking this IQ test. So I ran through it and had to sign in before it would tell me my score. Then this guys picture came up and it asked if I was interested. I was scared silly. I went right for that little red 'X' in the upper right-hand corner.

[Sgent]

69. Can't speak for myself

But both my parents used match and yahoo after they split up. They were both fairly picky, but are now in long term relationships with people they met.

In all likelyhood they would have never met their SO without online dating -- either to geogrpahic limitations (my mother is engaged to a professor who lived about 50 miles away) or social circles.

[Philosophy]

71. I tried it

Only problem is that all the women I'm interested in are really, really far away from south Alabama. I'm getting pretty desperate to move.

[ffm172]

74. I met a lot of guys trough

Black Planet and Migente. It was fun chatting with them and I met some of them in real life also. And the best part about it: I met my boyfriend that way.

[bugslsu9]

77. It works

I met my wife on Match.com. She was the Maid of Honor at her friend's wedding, and her friend met her husband on Match.com. There were at least 5 other couples who attended that wedding who met on Match.com who are now either married or engaged.

MY opinion of Match is fair....... just kidding. I thought it was an absolutely great site. While I have not been on it in over 2 years, I cannot imagine my life if I hadn't gone there. My advice, give it a shot. But don't just leave right away, give it time. It took over 6 months to meet my wife, but it was definitely worth it.

Good luck

[Longgrain]

78. Thanks to everyone who replied...

I think I'm going to have to check out some of these sites now.

Your advise has been apprechiated...:hi:

[Brewman_Jax]

79. Have tried them

I had the same opinion, personals are for desperate lonely old people--'til I became one. :silly: To borrow an old bank robber's answer, personals are where the people looking to meet are.

My success has been minimal (to add, non-white guys aren't in the top-rated category). Most of the time it's too few common interests or too far away. Most of the women who answered didn't show in my search results. (I wonder if they even actually read my ad. ) Even had a few answer from out-of-town. The latest response: a music shop manager and country music fan from Nashville who's a conservative. Last time I checked, Nashville and Atlanta aren't neighboring cities. :crazy:

It's at least worth a try. A night out is usually more than the monthly subscription cost. From the above posters, there are those who've been very successful. :thumbsup: It's another method of meeting, like clubs or sports. Just keep it in perspective. :hi:

[Orsino]

80. Success story here...

morillon and I met via Match.com nearly ten years ago (when it was still free), and will celebrate our ninth anniversary this year.

It's been awesome.

[semillama]

81. I used nerve.com and met the love of my life

so I have a positive experience with them.

Even before I met her, using the online dating service got me more dates in three months than I had had in the previous three years. so go for it.