The Alligator

[oneighty]

Hey Gator? Whatcha be doing up there on the hill? Sunning, warming up for the hunt. But you be where I wanna be. Soon he leaves splash!

Where I work in the creeks and ditches of the Santee River Delta there are Alligators. Big ones, little ones. This was a Big one, about ten feet long.

With my big thirty two foot work boat the "Vicky Mary" I have towed my small boat to an oyster bank I have been planning to raid. I anchor up Vicky and start paddeling the little boat to the oyster bank. It is then I see the Gator! I toss a few oyster shells at him, holler, yell, ask him to leave. Soon he gets the message, raises high on his legs, zips into the water. Fast he is.

I start working the oysters, pick a large cluster, knock off the dead shell, toss the good parts into the small boat. I keep one eye on the water looking for Mr. Gator and the other eye on my prize, the oysters. It is a small oyster bank. I get about twenty bushels of nice clusters. I make fifty dollars on the oysters.

Back on the Vicky Mary I make a fresh pot of coffee. Fire up her diesel engine, tow my oysters back to the dock.

180

[radwriter0555]

1. I always say, ask a critter real nice to move on up out the way,

they're generally real happy to oblige.

They're not that far removed from us after all. And all we want most is to be left alone.

[MaryBear]

2. I guess that bear lover forgot

to talk nicely.

I enjoy your stories, 180. :hi:

[radwriter0555]

3. LOL yeah no kidding eh?

Nah, them folks were BONDING with the bears, not respecting the distance needed.

[JitterbugPerfume]

4. Stay away from bears Oneighty

Aligators too

Go live in a cave (haha)

[trof]

5. Gators

1. Head west out of Wolf Bay, through Graham Bayou, up into Graham Creek. You might as well be on the Amazon. No sign of humans.
But lots of gator sign. The needle rush and sawgrass is mashed down in long swaths. This is the gatoriest looking place I've ever seen, but I've never seen a gator here.

I have seen gators 3 times, but always out in open water on the bay.
????

2. There's a 10 footer that seems to hang out around the mouth of Graham Bayou (but I know damned well he/she lives up the creek). A lady feared for the safety of her toy poodle and called fish & game to come remove him. Two guys came out with all the gator grabbing gear in their truck. They looked around and said "Lady, when we capture a gator this is the kind of place we BRING 'em to."
uh oh

[oneighty]

6. Our back yard

was an old rice plantation. Can you say Gators at the back door? The dogs could only go out side leashed and attended to. We worried for the children as well. We did not stay at THAT place very long. The town police killed a big Gator hanging around the swimming area watching the village children..Them there Gators are dangerous.

180

[MaryBear]

7. Yikes!

That's why I like California, in spite of Ahnold.

If you ever publish your stories, let me know, 180.

[sister_rosa_refried]

8. I'll never forget it.

Years ago I was in Florida at the Nun-A-Thon '76, some of the gals and I went on a boat tour of some swamplands. Well, before we left for the tour we stopped off at the hotel cocktail for a few Boiler Makers. Sister Lotta Lucy from Our Lady of The Golden Arches (convent and McDonald's francise) was feeling no pain and the rest of us girls knew we'd have to keep a holy eye on her.

As we departed on our tour Sister Lotta thought it would be fun to throw some raw steaks into the water. (she always keeps some t-bones in her beer cooler, just in case) Well, Lotta starts to throw out a big juicy slab into the water when all of a sudden an alligator rams the side of the boat knock the beer cooler, Sister Lotta and myself into the water. To my horror the only thing standing between the gator and the steak was me. As the other sister tried to haul Lotta Lucy's lard butt back in the boat, they look on in horror as the gator made it way to me. Let me tell you, I was countin' beads like there was no tommorow (and at that moment, it didn't look like there would be one for me). Suddenly, the beast took a sharp turn and headed right at the floating beer cooler. With his snout, he lifted the cooler onto his back and swam to shore.

Sister Lotta Lucy, seeing that our beer was gone drove habbit first into the water and swam like Mark Spitz to shore. As she stomped through the mud and approached the gator, she was greeted with a full set of snarling teeth and a deafening roar! Sister LL not about to take any guff, slapped the monster right across the face and bellowed "ahhhhhhhhh shuuuuuuddddd uuppppp!". The gator stuck it's mighty tail between his legs and scurried into the bushing "yi! yi! yi! yi!".

Moral of this story. While it's not a good a idea to get between a gator and a steak. It's not a bitch getting between a pack of nuns a load of beer.

[MaryBear]

9. Are, or were, you really a Nun?