Seagull Herpes, anyone?

[Dastard Stepchild]

I just found a rather humorous blog while doing some internet trolling. It's from a guy that receives script proposals at Paramount. I won't share all the delicious stories... I'll include a link for that. But this one really takes the cake.

I have written a novel of 75,000 words. The genre is speculative fiction.

The protagonist takes his courses of action seriously, but he has a subtle humor about him that comes without his intentions. This also goes for one companion and a few other characters. Many characters that are not funny range from weird to hocking.

The protagonist's challenges throughout the story are:
1) A seagull attack gave him Seagull Herpes, an incurable disease that will soon kill him.
2) The seagull attack also tore a bone within his calf in two. His best medicines are herbs and acupuncture, so the bone never fully heals, and it causes internal bleeding for him to walk. The story involves him running a lot.
3) He has to save his continent from a thing that is destroying it. A corporation has been selling an additive in forms like cigarettes that is not a virus, drug, or nano-machine. Nobody knows what it is, but the smell causes addiction. Withdrawal is fatal. The protagonist has few people willing to help and most have died.


Background:
The year is 3126 and a cataclysm three centuries ago had caused a dark age. Whether this is good or bad is open to opinion. The setting is about frontiers and the unknown, not about the cataclysm. The corporation that caused the cataclysm intended world domination, but they split into six corporations that have feuded amongst each other. One of these six corporations makes the unknown additive that they put into products such as cigarettes. Most places are a wilderness and the wild animals left alive are farm animals and pony-sized dogs.

The website:
http://queryletters.blogspot.com/