teaching young children and the "gross factor"

[ulysses]

Be forewarned. Discussion of bodily functions follows.

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I like teaching the seriously short set. I really do. They get really excited when the lightbulb comes on about 5+7 or what division actually means, and other than the "he's being mean!" crying jag, they're fun to watch interact with each other.

My students are at all points between 5 1/2 and 12. Going into a job like this, one recognizes that one's charges will have...interesting relationships with their bodily functions. The youngest ones of both genders still occasionally play with themselves in class (to a more or less demure degree) and forget to flush or piss in the right direction in the bathroom, the middle ages find farts and associated jokes hysterically funny, and the oldest are beginning to discover their sexuality. I can deal with all these easily enough, mostly by ignoring or flushing them.

Today we had a particularly vivid booger incident. Just before lunch.

Pee, poop, gas, hormones - no problem. Snot in its various phases of being is a different story. Teachers! Parents! How do you deal with the gross factor? Does it just pass?

[MuseRider]

1. You just seriously

cracked me up! What a funny post! Mine are almost grown so it has been a while. What is a vivid booger incident? I am still laughing.

[ulysses]

7. "Mr. Uly!" they cried.

"So and So has something wrong with her face!"

Mr. Uly got So and So to remove her hand from her cheek and there it sat. Fully an inch long, probably more. Fresh, for lack of a better word. No, I have no idea how she managed to get it there. She probably has no idea either.

[MuseRider]

12. Those always

happen when you have no tissue and are getting ready to go inside a restaurant. I was thinking that maybe you had a serious case of bubble blowing going on, that was always cause for a scene in my house. The worst part is one will laugh then the other will get mad then they fight and it gets all over both of them. I find children quite refreshing and it is such a blast watching how they deal with things isn't it?

[ulysses]

17. rofl!

No bubbles, although we've had that in my room too. Ick. Motherscratching Ick.

The kids are a genuine trip. I never thought that I could teach younger kids, and I've found that I can. It's just a matter of patience, which is largely what teaching is ever about. Honestly, the hardest and sweetest times have been when several of the youngest ones have slipped up and called me "daddy". It's funny as hell, and they laugh at themselves a lot. The pay aside, I wouldn't trade it for anything.

[MuseRider]

19. You sound

exactly like the kind of teacher I always wanted for my kids. Understanding, interested and caring. They are lucky to have you even if you do not get the snot fun! I have always loved the little ones and miss mine being little but they are so much fun as they get older. Still, the little ones are precious. The little, hidden pats you get are worth more than a bag full of gold.

[Shakeydave]

2. Was it just a Farmer Sneeze or a..........................

full blown Snot Rocket?

[ulysses]

8. somewhere in between, I suspect.

I didn't witness the birth.

[Maddy McCall]

3. Well, according to the guy in the SUV with the Bush bumpersticker today..

beside me on the avenue, who had his finger buried in his nose up to his knuckle, booger things don't pass.

I guess once a digger always a digger.

:-)

[-..__...]

4. Grossology 101

http://www.kidsdomain.com/review/kdr/gross.html

Features:
9 Exploratory labs with interactive posters.
9 games of gross fun - Booger Block, Burp-O-Rama and worse.
Encyclopedia of gross terms, gooey recipes and an audio lab.
Notepad with gross clip art.
Award certificates.
Grossology web site to expand the product.


Technical Aspects:
While Grossology puked, peed, belched and pooped its way across the screen, the sounds were loud and clear, uninterrupted by choppy audio or video. This title runs as smoothly as diarrhea...


Hell, when I was a kid we had to learn math, english, American history, etc.

However, I did have ample opportunity to pick my nose and wipe it underneath the desk.

[cmd]

5. You must have missed Cheswick's post

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=105&topic_id=291408

[ulysses]

6. LOL! I did.

Same idea.

[KG]

9. HA!

a job whine diguised as a cute homily...

you don't fool me, mister!

[ulysses]

11. ah, but did your now ex-boss

play with himself while ignoring your carefully planned lesson on telling time?

I rest my case? :D

[cmd]

16. I remember this line

O.K. Everyone, hands on the table! LOL

[populistmom]

10. There's nothing wrong with reminding them about appropriate behavior

Fart jokes aren't too big of a deal, but when they play with themselves, they need to be told privately that this is a personal thing and they need to do this at home in private, not in school. (I have 3 little boys, I've said this numerous times.) You can remind everyone as a group to flush. Also, you can privately tell anyone you see picking their nose to wash their hands. Perhaps do a lesson on hygeine for kids and keep boxes of kleenexes handy. Do you by chance teach an afterschool program? I did a few years ago and had the same range of ages and it was the hardest job I ever had. In fact, it made me stop my educational pursuits in teaching.

Good luck!

Sarah

[ulysses]

13. these things do get done.

Especially the flushing thing. I'm the sole male on the staff, and took it upon myself a couple of months ago to point out to the lads that someone was watching the restroom. Their aim and flushing skills improved dramatically.

This, I think, was a situational thing. I hope so, anyway.

[populistmom]

15. Keep up the good work then

Frequently, I find with children that after the thousandth time of telling them something, all of the sudden, it clicks and they get it.

Sarah

[MuseRider]

14. I sat next to a guy

in nursing school who still had not learned not to play with himself! We had to eventually complain and eventually he quit. I wish his mom had been as good as you about talking to him.

[mbartko]

18. My two-year old daughter,

Beautiful, intelligent, wonderful love of my life, has become a serial booger-eater. Beats me what to do. The more attention I gave it, the more theatrical it becomes. The finger goes up the nose, there is a pause for dramatic flair, then, when she's sure she has my full attention - pop, finger in the mouth.

How do you express, "This will not bode well for you socially", to a two-year-old?

[cmd]

20. Mrs. NXXXX, I'm bleeeeeeeeeeeding

Called one of my little five year olds.
Where, M.?
On my leg.
Is it a lot or a little bit?
I'll show you.
Down comes the pants and underwear in front of the whole class.
M had a rash and had done some scratching. There was a small drop of blood and NOTHING ELSE!

[SOteric]

21. With my various nieces and nephews I embrace the oogy-ness.

And flip it right back at them.

I buy bulk gummy bears and gummy worms, pre-selecting only the white and yellow varieties. I chop them up in a random fashion so that their shapes are indistinguishable. Then I cover them with a fine layer of milk chocolate.

This is a treat I give them called 'chocolate-covered boogers.'

The groans, 'eiyeewwws' and objections the older ones teach the younger ones something about the social acceptability of boogers. And all of them will happily eat the damned things and still think I'm the 'coolest aunt, evarrrrrr.'