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Who Is Ready For Wal-Mart WINE!

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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 04:36 PM
Original message
Who Is Ready For Wal-Mart WINE!
Edited on Mon Oct-20-03 04:36 PM by matcom
received via email :bounce:

BENTONVILLE, ARK -- Some Wal-Mart customers soon will be able to
sample a new discount item -- Wal-Mart's own brand of wine. The world's
largest retail chain is teaming up with E&J Gallo Winery of Modesto,
Calif., to produce the spirits at an affordable price, in the $2-5 range.

While wine connoisseurs may not be inclined to throw a bottle of Wal-Mart
brand wine into their shopping carts, there is a market for cheap wine,
said Mr.Tom Mahon, Super Salesman of the Year, He said: "You gotta
unnerstan,The right name is important."

So, here we go...

The top 12 suggested names for Wal-Mart Wine:

12. Chateau Traileur Parc

11. White Trashfindel

10. Big Red Gulp

9. Grape Expectations

8. Domaine Wal-Mart "Merde du Pays"

7. NASCARbernet

6. Chef Boyardeaux

5. Peanut Noir

4. Chateau des Moines

3. I Can't Believe It's Not Vinegar!

2. World Championship Riesling

And the number 1 name for Wal-Mart Wine is...

1. Nasti Spumante
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speckledgator Donating Member (232 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 04:39 PM
Response to Original message
1. hehehe
I'll be sure to pick up some 7-11 sushi to go with it! omg
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Guaranteed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 04:41 PM
Response to Original message
2. Hee hee I heard about this a couple of years ago...
...I wrote an email to my local radio morning guys and they read the names I'd made up on the air...
I think one was "John Doe Merlot"....oh yeah "Gerber's Grape Mash"...."Mother-cussin' Robitussin." :)
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mbartko Donating Member (199 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 04:42 PM
Response to Original message
3. We had a rash of incidents
around the 'Burgh where people were stealing and drinking vanilla extract. This could potentially be a target demographic.
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progressiverealist Donating Member (460 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 04:42 PM
Response to Original message
4. oh my god...
That is hilarious. As I live in one of the more redneck-populated parts of Wisconsin, that gave me a much needed guffaw.

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brainshrub Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 04:48 PM
Response to Original message
5. Laugh all you want
But now Wal Mart is going to run all the local vineyards under. Bastards.
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Guaranteed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 05:15 PM
Response to Reply #5
8. I'm thinking this isn't real.
I heard about this about a year and a half to two years ago.
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ozymandius Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 04:50 PM
Response to Original message
6. Wal-Mart wine: perfectly suited for regurgitation.
It really cleans out the sloo on both ends.
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Fitzovich Donating Member (179 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 05:13 PM
Response to Original message
7. Priceless!
Absolutely Priceless!

Support the Striking and Lockout Grocery Workers across the Country!
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JanMichael Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 05:23 PM
Response to Original message
9. While I love being offensive I just can't laugh at this one...
It's sad.
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CanuckAmok Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 06:00 PM
Response to Original message
10. There used to be a BC wine called "Rotting Grape"--
it was a kind of Gen-Xy responst to wine pretension. Actually wasn't bad!

I can see that going down at WalMart, eexcept it'd be "Rottin' Grape"
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WindRavenX Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 06:01 PM
Response to Original message
11. Great! Now I can get trashed reaaal cheap!
:eyes: :eyes: :eyes:
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AquariDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 06:05 PM
Response to Original message
12. I know the second part is parody (lol)
But what about the first half? I sure hope so.
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jmowreader Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Oct-20-03 11:28 PM
Response to Original message
13. No, no, you don't understand, wine must have a French name to be good
So, all you Francophones, how exactly does one say "paint thinner" in French?
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