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Where is the "light hearted romance" anymore? Is it DEAD? Has Botox

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KoKo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 07:40 PM
Original message
Where is the "light hearted romance" anymore? Is it DEAD? Has Botox
Edited on Tue Oct-28-03 07:41 PM by KoKo01
and Silicon and Cutting Edge replaced it? Was it ever there? Have any of you lived like a 30's movie in your life? Do you feel you are "out of the mainstream?"

I'm understanding that DU Gay/Lesbians have their own versions of this, but I'm trying to keep this "hetero sexual" for this post. But....if you (gays/lesbians),have some great "even Audrey Hepburn" scenario of reliving "light hearted romance" please go for it and post.

Is there anything left of romance? Keeping your clothes on and peeling off one by one, as fantasy rather than "baring it all and "let's get down and DO IT IN THE GRASS!"

I guess this post is about "Subtlety as being a GREAT SEXUAL TURN ON....rather than "IN YOUR FACE" media stuff that passes for sexual entertainment and fantasy.

I'm sort of tired of "IN YOUR FACE!" and.....think Subtlety, might have a place?

:shrug: Does anyone even know what I'm talking about? Duh............whatever......Duh.........????

ROMANCE! What is it? And, does it even NEED to exist today to turn folks on when there's so much else: Big Dicks, Porn Rentals, Stars who have Exploited, Sports stars who "get it on Big Time," MTV, VH-1, Animal Planet's Animals in Rut," Commercials for Viagra, and the female counterpart, "Big Cars: HUMMERS, MACHO," Reality TV Shows, People in Need, Sexual Disfunction, etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc. etc.

Just asking......sort of confused here???
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KoKo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 07:46 PM
Response to Original message
1. BTW: for those who notice my posts and critize me for ............sorry...
I just think that way. Some people have PM'd me that I over use my........and it makes them avoid my posts...so just saying..I expect this post to "archive" over content or ..........!

I still have to have my....... My brain just works that way....constant stream of thought....amounting to?? whatever....sorry :-(
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mitchum Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 07:58 PM
Response to Reply #1
4. I have no problem with anyone using...
ellipses
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KoKo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 08:20 PM
Response to Reply #4
7. Thanks! But, I've tried to cut them back with criticizm. Glad to know
they don't bother some! :-)'s
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Laszlo_Hollyfeld Donating Member (105 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 08:15 PM
Response to Reply #1
5. I don't have a problem with ellipses
but the object of written communication isn't to write down everything that comes into your mind. Ultimately, it tends to take the power out of your written words by distracting and derailing the path of your thought.

I'm honestly not sure what your original question is. But if it's whether 'romance is dead' so to speak, then no.

I get in very romantic moods.

I'm not sure what link I'm supposed to find between romance and Botox. :shrug:
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SoCalDem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 02:42 AM
Response to Reply #1
16. No I do not mind one bit !!!!................... I do it too..
and I even use >>>>>>>> or ,,,,,,,,, or ::::::


I have also used @@@@ and ~~~~~~~ from time to time..

I know exactly what you are getting at :):):):)


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alwynsw Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 07:54 PM
Response to Original message
2. I'm just old fashioned, I suppose.
Making love, not sex, romantically is the thing for me. Anticipation can be as rewarding as consumation. Consumation is far better when preceded by great anticipation. I am not referring to the anticipation generated by foreplay, although that has a very prominent place in my opinion.

Dinner, at a restaurant or home, gifts, gestures, small talk, and all of the other ingredients of romance are an absolute necessity IMO.

The current Hollywood version leaves me cold. I can masturbate and feel as fulfilled as I can with the cut to the chase type of sex.
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Kamika Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 07:57 PM
Response to Original message
3. romance is boring
Edited on Tue Oct-28-03 07:58 PM by Kamika
I think romance was something that was needed when ppl werent as sexual as we are now.. I dunno but give me a guy that picks me up and carries me to bed anytime over some guy that wants to "talk" to me over a candlelit dinner for hours and hours
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KoKo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 08:16 PM
Response to Reply #3
6. Seems you are a "cut to the chase, "let's get it on" type. Doesn't
Edited on Tue Oct-28-03 08:18 PM by KoKo01
that get boring? Have you had folks you've "gotten it on with" ask you that? Or, have you been sucessful in not ever having anyone ask you that question....?
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Kamika Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 08:26 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. no not boring
Only time i got bored was with a guy that only talked and never tried anything.


Nobody ever asked me that until now :)

I'm not a romantic type so I guess I dont meet too many guys who are into that either
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KoKo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 08:58 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. I wish I could understand how you feel......sigh.....I just don't.
Just don't get it....:-(
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E_Zapata Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 08:17 AM
Response to Reply #8
22. The thing is,
Edited on Wed Oct-29-03 08:22 AM by E_Zapata
I tend to remember VIVIDLY the romantic gestures and moments. Sure, I might remember having had a really satisfying orgamic sex session, but it's those little things that my mate did that made me feel like the most special mate in the world that I remember.

And the aromas, I remember.

And those special deep longing looks long before we know we can retire behind closed doors.

Or running out into the cold barefoot to get more firewood and having one's lover warm your tootsies......and then slowly getting back 'in the mood'. Nothing better than hearing, "now, where were we? ohhhhhh, yes, that's where we were..."

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qwertyMike Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 04:53 AM
Response to Reply #3
17. Yeah, screw dinner
Waste of sack time.
Best conversation is 'afterwards' or better still 'during'.

Peace
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Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 08:59 PM
Response to Original message
10. What is this romance that everyone talks about?
Really, I feel in the dark about this. My husband and I share our life togther and are committed to this endevor. We are also great friends and have great sex. We hear about how it is important to have romance in one's marriage. We hear how people can be friends and have sex but how it isn't a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship because there is no "romance". Yeah, I'm not really sure what romance is. Someone enlighten me. You must remember that my parents divorced at an early age and all my mother's marriages and relationships have been disfunctional. As far as my husband's parents, the last time they had sex was when he was five years old (Really, they have said this.).
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KoKo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 09:18 PM
Response to Reply #10
11. From what I hear from your post Nikia, you have a "practical, fulfilling
relationship and you have sex included, which is wonderful.

I still have thoughts of romance. It's a "turn on" for some of us...and there's so little around. But, glad to hear you don't need it. I've wondered if "romance was dead." That's why I posted.

It's necessary for those of us who love romance to know why it doesn't exist anymore. A dinosaur.........but, we need to know this.
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E_Zapata Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 08:21 AM
Response to Reply #10
23. I come from a line of very unromantic folks and grandparents
and I am as romantic as they get.

A person is either romantic or they aren't. It comes from some part of their being. I have had friends.....like a gal pal, who is THE most beautiful, stunning beauty (a healthy model type) - not a romantic bone in her body! Didn't know what she would do when she started dating a romantic man - "ugh! candles and all!" she said!

Koko - next thread idea: what makes a person romantic? (not what they do, but what part of their being and upbringing or influences or whatever it is makes a person ROMANTIC)
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Armstead Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Oct-28-03 09:29 PM
Response to Original message
12. I'm old fashoined I guess
Edited on Tue Oct-28-03 09:30 PM by Armstead
I sorta think sex is meaninglress and boring unless it's part of a bigger connection and committment and friendship. All that adds up to romance.


I guess that's old fashioned, but just the way I've always seen it.

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Armstead Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 01:06 AM
Response to Reply #12
13. Oh gosh, I've killed anotehr thread.
Can;t have that now.... :kick:
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ScreamingMeemie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 01:08 AM
Response to Original message
14. It is sleeping upstairs right now. We have such different
schedules now...Romance and I....sigh.
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 01:09 AM
Response to Original message
15. I swear to god it's gone
Anytime...in recent years..that I have ever tried to be romantic...people call me old fashioned...blame britney, justin, and all the other "sex,sex,sex" superstars.
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TrogL Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 05:58 AM
Response to Original message
18. Plastic talk
A great deal of this "romantic" crap was part of the conservative socialization safety net of blather, blather, blather because all the social norms of conservatism had to be met before you could actually get around to doing anything.

I think we've moved beyond that.
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Hubert Flottz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 06:19 AM
Response to Original message
19. Because," We come here today, with a heavy heart!"
Romance is being replace by survival look at your TV!
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E_Zapata Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 08:03 AM
Response to Original message
20. Old fashioned romance is way alive in my soul
Edited on Wed Oct-29-03 08:26 AM by E_Zapata
and always will be. It's a state of mind.

For one - never expect much from any potential mate who tells you what kind of car they have (unless it's a beater car). Or anyone who tends to wear clothes where you don't have to even see the label to know it's designer.

If you find a mate who is down to earth -- NATURE will take care of itself.

I had a wonderful walk in the light rain recently - very romantic. Hand holding of course. Hand holding is muy romantico!

Kissing = all kinds of kissing (aside from the tongue down the throat action designed to apparently tell the gal what she gets to do later to his you know what! How rude. The gal will decide that, thank you! What do guys think? That women get all hot and bothered FANTASIZING about giving head? Sure, it's a fine thing when you get to it.....but leave it in THE moment)

Anyways...kissing...playful, teasing, fun kissing. Yum.

FOOD - food, food, food. To share a luscious meal or a special delicacy with one's lover. Nothing better.

ON EDIT: eating after lovemaking - preferably in bed and with our hands.

Just the basics........works wonders.
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Loonman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 08:09 AM
Response to Original message
21. Romance is overrated
Biological need to procreate.
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BlueJazz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 08:59 AM
Response to Original message
24. KoKo01.....I know Exactly what you mean.
Part of the "Find them, Feel them, Fuck them" thing is simply not bothering to get to know someone.

As a former working Musician, I had my share of 0ne night (or even 10 night stands). I was sitting here trying to remember some of them and it's really hard to recall the various partners....They mean nothing now because they meant nothing then.

I DO remember the one or two that I instantly liked and spent some time with (sending flowers to her workplace, talking on the phone and yes, even long dinners).

I believe 2 people either have a deep chemistry and a lasting love or have just a basic human attraction and want to bang each others bones. With a True Love you have both long togetherness and great lust.

With a one night stand you can have great lust but damn, you're really only getting half of the picture.
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supernova Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-29-03 09:00 AM
Response to Original message
25. There's room for both
sex and romance are a banquet from which to sample many different types of dishes. Sometimes I want romance (hand holding, candelight, small touches and gestures, hugs, longing looks in crowdded rooms, all of it); sometimes I want it straight up against the wall, no prelims necessary. ;-)

I decide which I'm in the mood for at any given time. I am one of those who has to have a deep emotional connection to feel sexual though. I can't immediately feel sexual with someone I don't know, or know only superficially.





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