Men, Women, educate the other gender about your gender

[CTLawGuy]

(note to easily offended people - this is only meant as a fun, maybe humorous exercise, so voice your dissenting opinion within the bounds of that spirit :))

About men:

1. Men will not share a bed with other men when going on a trip, because we know what men do in bed.... :evilgrin:

2. Many men are not attracted to emaciated models. We like curves and women who look like women. The obsession of some women with being insanely thin confuses us.

3. Girlfriends and wives do not need to compete with strippers or porn actresses. If your man sees a stripper it does not mean you are suddenly inadequate. A girlfriend or wife provides so much more for a man than a stripper or a porno ever can, such as genuine love, support, companionship.

What other nuggests of wisdom do you have? :)

[sparky_in_ma]

1. It is frowned on for men to talk in the men's room.

Bad form.

[mark414]

2. indeed

it's just weird, though i suppose it's ok if you're both at the sink or something...but even then...

[sparky_in_ma]

4. true,

at the sink you might say "hey, how about them Packers", but that is about it.

[CTLawGuy]

3. oh yes

you must know the code of the mens room.

If no one is at the urinals, you are to take the one on the end. then, if another man comes in, he should go to the one on the opposite end. Then a third should go to the one directly in the middle.

It is a major faux pas to go in a urinal directly next to another man, if there are others available.

[Huckebein the Raven]

18. Yep

[kaitykaity]

5. About women:

Little nugget: If you take out the garbage without being
asked or otherwise do something to make our lives easier,
we'll be a lot more responsive to you in the bedroom.

[sparky_in_ma]

6. I hadn't thought of that.

I've always resorted to alcohol. Taking out the garbage would be cheaper. :P

[kaitykaity]

7. Careful, this is bordering on one of those "no-no"s.

:evilgrin:

I have a smartass remark, but don't want to trash
this person's thread.

:hi:

[CTLawGuy]

8. well thank you!

if it's in the spirit of fun and doesn't begin with "It's sad to see how even progressives..." it's ok by me :)

[kaitykaity]

11. Lol.

I was just going to say how much more fun it is
with a sober partner, that giving/receiving stuff.

I must have missed the context of the whole
brouhaha.

[CTLawGuy]

14. nah

its just that I've tangled with certain DUers who are outside the mainstream of feminism (IMHO) before...

[kaitykaity]

19. I used to be one of those a long time ago.

I got tired of being mad all the time about things
I had no control over.

I also got tired of being the one poked at parties
so they'd see what kind of arguing mood I was in.

[sparky_in_ma]

12. I'm sorry

Please accept my apology.

[kaitykaity]

13. Oops. I'm sorry.

You didn't do anything.

You really didn't. Really.

[sparky_in_ma]

15. That's another thing about men

We've learned to apologize,just to be on the safe side. And show up with flowers.:D

[kaitykaity]

17. Yeah, but it only works like twice.

After that there's it doesn't seem sincere.

[pansypoo53219]

9. can't

i don't think i fit the profile for a woman. or, hmm. well, maybe i just think more like a guy, minus the porn obsession.

[CTLawGuy]

10. do you watch sports for reasons other than to look at the athletes' butts?

NT

[CTLawGuy]

16. I remember watching Law and Order on TNT

this year just before the Super Bowl, and I saw a commercial that said "This sunday watch the all-day "Charmed" marathon on TNT instead of the Super Bowl."

Now those of you who are unfamiliar with "Charmed" you need to know it features three attractive 20-something women from San Francisco who have magic powers.

When I saw that ad, I was thinking "wow, watch "Charmed" instead of the super bowl? What would they have to do to get guys to go for that? then i decided they'd probably have to have the three witches get naked and have sex with each other in order to pry men away from the Super Bowl. and then it would be hard. :)

I remember a few years ago there was a pay-per view halftime show where women in lingerie played football. I'd like to know who actually paid for that. I'd introduce them to Mr. Internet.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

20. Advice from Auntie Lydia

1. If you are a young guy, don't believe what other young guys tell you about women. They're as clueless as you are and are just bullshitting.

2. We don't like it when men use lame lines that they read in a magazine somewhere or heard on TV. If it's not a line that you thought up on the spur of the moment in response to a specific situation, forget it. Just say, "Hi" and comment on something immediate.

3. We don't talk about you in our locker rooms. We save those conversations for over coffee. In our locker rooms, we talk about everything except the men in our lives (or not in our lives, as the case may be.)

4. Most of us are unimpressed and even turned-off by the muscle man look. We look at a man's eyes, smile, and, in the crudest physical sense, butt.

5. With all the talk of the "fragile male ego," let us not forget that there's a female ego, too. It's tougher than yours, but it's still capable of being injured.

6. We can't understand how you can get along with just pockets and no purse.

7. The women who are all subservient and air-headed around you resent kowtowing to you and will hate you more and more as time goes on. They will be relieved when you die. There would be nothing as frightening for a man to eavesdrop on as a group of eighty-year-old women from a subservient generation or culture.

8. Any woman who will date you just because you drive a fancy sports car probably deserves a man who is stupid enough to think that a fancy sports car is a "babe magnet."

9. A woman caught with an unexpected need for, uh, sanitary supplies will not hesitate to approach a completely unknown woman to ask for help, which will be freely given.

10. There's a whole language of gestures, eye movements, and strategems that women use among themselves in the presence of men, and the men never catch on. Prime example: Suppose I am talking to an attractive man at a party. His wife/girlfriend sidles up to him, puts her arm around his waist, and stares into my eyes. That's the secret signal for "Back off. He's taken." (Oops, have I revealed a secret of the sisterhood?)

[CTLawGuy]

21. that was revealing :)

thanks lydia!

[RandomKoolzip]

22. I know so little about being a HUMAN....

that trying to inform one camp of the other's peccadilloes and foibles would be incredibly presumptuous.

Having said that, guys dig chicks who aren't really skinny.

That is all.

[HEyHEY]

23. I've got one

Next time you're considering yelling at a man... take a step back and think: "In what context did he say what he just said?"

[bettyellen]

26. huh? i know what you mean though.... this was the only man advice my dad

ever gave me. if you have a problem, have it, but inside, just the two of you. never pick a fight in front of his friends. and i would never do that or put up with it either.
my aunt used to do this to my dad's little brother, and my dad was convinced it killed him.

[Bouncy Ball]

24. Not all women love to cuddle.

I'm a non-cuddler, for the most part.

But it's assumed all women demand cuddling.

[HEyHEY]

25. So, opposed to cuddling?

:evilgrin:

[Bouncy Ball]

27. I just don't have a lot of use for it.

The well-placed hug is nice. Kisses are nice. Other stuff is great.

But cuddling is a bit sweaty, leads to limbs that fall asleep. I need my space, you know?

[CTLawGuy]

29. had the same prob with an ex gf

I can't sleep without a lot of space. I need to toss and turn. SO it doesn't work if I'm snugging with someone.

[Bouncy Ball]

31. Yep. It's the reason we own a king-sized bed.

If I could have purchased a larger bed, I would have. Fortunately he's not a cuddler, either. It works out great.

We can touch hands or something. Or feet. But anything else is claustrophobic.

[bettyellen]

28. is it you that's jumpy or your husband?

i remember you describing quite the little midnight dance.....

[Bouncy Ball]

30. Jumpy?

No comprende...

[bettyellen]

32. doesn't one of you roll around a lot while sleeping? weren't you pinned?

wasn't that you, sweetie?
can i tell you, jimmy jazz doesn't move a muscle. just goes to show, you never know until you're there.

[Bouncy Ball]

33. Oh yeah I'm very fidgety at night.

He snores his ass off and sweats unless we have sub-arctic temps going on.

He tries to use me as a body pillow and I'm just not having that.

[Huckebein the Raven]

34. I'm more of a diagonal sleeper

[bettyellen]

35. ah hah, fidgity ! i wouldn't try to cuddle with you with a ten foot poll!

but jimmy jazz makes a mighty fine body pilllow.
i was tempted.