"Dad, she's dead..please help me".. What would YOU do as the parent?

[SoCalDem]

re: the Aruba case and the van der sloots..

I suspect that there are parents who would help, and some that wouldn't..

How far would you go to protect your own from legal trouble/moral responsibility?

disclaimer..My husband and I took our son to the cops when he took our car and came home high as a kite..(he was 15..the cop laughed at us, and said it was a "family matter"..:grr:

[OldLeftieLawyer]

1. "legal trouble"?

Or "responsibility'?

BIG difference there.

Who's dead?

[mondo joe]

2. I'd get the best attorney I could as fast as I could.

From there it would depend on the rest of the story.

[EFerrari]

38. Yep. Me too, no matter the rest of the story though. n/t

[Kraklen]

3. There's an old saying, "you know your buddies your best friend..

if he helps you hide the body."

[OldLeftieLawyer]

68. That's the best moment in my favorite movie,

"Grosse Pointe Blank."

[TrogL]

4. OK, you just scared me

:wtf: is that all about?

What would I do? I'd hire a damn good lawyer. Other than that, we have free will - there are consequences.

[Cha]

6. I'm pretty sure she's talking about

the Aruba case.

[SoCalDem]

10. I edited and added that information

:)

sorry I scared y'all:)

[sniffa]

5. eat the body

no evidence

[redqueen]

7. You just reminded me of Eating Raoul...

thanks. :)

[Cha]

8. That's what sharks

are for.

[sniffa]

12. ooh, messy.

i'd use ants.

[Cha]

14. If yer were on an island it

would be more prudent to take advantage of the local shark infested waters.

[SoCalDem]

16. There's a "party-boat DJ" involved

They will never find her:(

[Cha]

19. Oh boy, it just gets more CSI

like by the minute.

[ronnykmarshall]

15. Eat ME!!

I had to turn this into a flirt w/ sniffa thread.

[sniffa]

21. mmmmm, deLicious

cake Looks good too. :evilgrin:

[ronnykmarshall]

42. mmmmmm

I love a sniffa welcome back.

BTW the kids.

Just got back from Vegas, we had FRONT ROW seats for Miss Gladys Knight. She was soooooo awasome. My mama even got to sing w/ Bubba Knight of the Pips. Came home with money .... so it was a good trip.

[MuseRider]

22. I love that picture! n/t

[SoCalDem]

30. Hey, now!!!

[alphafemale]

66. "The secret's in the sauce"

So I've heard...

No.

I'd get a good lawyer.

But aside from EXTRAORDINARY circumstances (ie Fried Green Tomatoes), I'd never be party to covering up a murder.

Not for anyone.

[LosinIt]

67. I'm sorry, I draw the line at chewing off the umbilical cord and eating

the placenta. I have my limits you know.

[Goldmund]

9. What sniffa said

[Lady President]

11. A friend helps you move...

Family helps you move a body.

Tacky expression, but it's true. I don't have kids, but if one my relatives made this request, I would start doing whatever it took. I wouldn't give it a second thought.

[SoCalDem]

13. Wow.. I don't think I could

:(

[LisaL]

41. Tell ya what. I wouldn't be moving no bodies, that's for sure.

If you do the crime, you should do the time. It's sick to be enabling someone who committed a crime, even if that person is your relative.

[Lady President]

43. Of course

Of course, you're right. It is morally reprehensible to attempt to conceal a murder. But, I absolutely would do it for my family.

My opinion could be skewed because my father worked in a prison most of my life. I can remember some of my parents' friends discussing whether they would let their kids spend the night in jail if they screwed up. All the parents said they would, except mine. My father said that he would do anything in his power to make sure I never spent a minute in jail or prison. I figure he would know best how bad it was, and I don't want my loved ones there-- regardless of what they do.

[mitchum]

17. Well, the Episcopal bishop of S. Carolina helped his fugitive...

dirtbag son hide from law enforcement after he contracted the murder of his wife back in the 90s. I guess that pulpit-dwelling grifter was a lot more comfortable dispensing moral verities to OTHERS.

[Pithlet]

18. I think I would make sure they had the best defense we could afford

But I don't think I would hide them from the law or help them to cover up the evidence.

[skygazer]

20. Depends on what you mean by "help"

I sure as hell wouldn't aid and abet a crime. I would lovingly explain that they needed to turn themselves in and face the consequences of their action. I'd hire the best attorney I could find, I would give them my love and support (which doesn't equal approval) and I would suffer horribly, as any parent would.

[MrSlayer]

23. I'd go as far as possible to protect my kids.

I'd lie, steal or kill for them as any good parent would.

[maveric]

26. If you kid killed someone, maliciously, would you hide him/her?

Even though they committed a heinous crime?
I would talk them into turning themself in, then lawyer up.

[SoCalDem]

27. My middle son was in all kinds of trouble when he was young

cost us a fortune.. anyway, I was so glad that he was in juvenile hall once when I open3d a paper and saw the names of two of his "friends" ..they were wanted for MURDER..My son swore up and down that he no longer hung out with them, but honestly..if he had not been locked up when it happened, I would have NEVER believed him..

Thankfully, he has turned his life around, and all of his crimes were stupid kid stuff,l but he was prolific, and we made him plead guilty, so he did time..

[MrSlayer]

31. If I could, yes.

I'd do whatever I could to prevent them from being arrested. Particularly if the authorities don't know that they did anything. It's hard to hide it if it's on video or something but if it can't be proven, I'm lying my ass off for them.

[maveric]

32. And you'd be ok with him/her free to kill again?

No empathy for the parents of who they killed?
I love my kids but if they turn into killer, scumbag psychos I would want them locked up before they hurt someone else.

[MrSlayer]

35. Well it would depend now wouldn't it?

I'm not saying if they were mass murders or serial killers I'd allow it to go on. I'm saying if there was a justifiable incident, a mistake or an accident I'd shield them. You're taking it to extremes, saying "free to kill again" implies that they have a mental disorder or whatever. If they were serial killers or mass murders or something sick like child murderers I'd pull the switch on the electric chair myself.

[maveric]

39. Lets say in an armed robbery or a kill in a drug deal?

Some people's kids are psychotic scumbags.

[MrSlayer]

44. It's really hard to say.

This is so far removed from anything I'd ever expect from my kids so I really can't tell. I don't expect them to ever have to strong arm rob someone and if anything went down in a drug deal it would have to be a kill them before they kill you type of thing. In that case I would protect them. Hopefully they will continue to be honor students and conscientious citizens and all of this will be moot.

[maveric]

47. But if they did,would you hide/aid them?

Knowing they were guilty of a violent crime like murder?

[MrSlayer]

49. Yes, probably.

Again, the circumstances would dictate what my actions would be. I have a buddy doing life and I do not want my kids anywhere near prison, guilty or not.

[maveric]

50. Even if they were at risk to kill again? And tear another mothers heart...

out?

[MrSlayer]

52. I already said I'd throw the switch myself if they were serial killers.

Or so fucking crazy they were in danger of killing people at random. I was going by the original poster's premise. That of a kid who made a bad mistake or happened to be there when shit went down and didn't know what to do. I'm not saying I would protect my 32 year old junkie psycho son if he decided to cut up a bunch of nuns or something. There's a difference between being a cold blooded, remorseless murderer and someone who accidentally kills someone or happens to be in a situation where a death occurs.

[bettyellen]

56. made a mistake or happened to be there when shit went down.....

not in the original post, but a really telling assumption.

[MrSlayer]

59. I didn't assume anything.

I'm simply making the point there there is a difference between malicious killing and accidental or incidental killing. Those suggestions I made would be the light end, slowly chainsawing someone to death just for the fun of it would be the heavy. Everything would depend on the circumstances.

[bettyellen]

60. unless he rewrote the OP, which is possible that's not in it.....

"I was going by the original poster's premise. That of a kid who made a bad mistake or happened to be there when shit went down and didn't know what to do."

or i'm blind, but i don't see that premise anywhere in the post.
chainsawing is an interesting distinction. how do you feel about a shotgun blast for the babe who dumped him a year prior. maybe she was a real bitch and deserved it?
i'm sure that would be his take on things. it's a slippery slope, in my mind.

[MrSlayer]

61. My apologies.

I was just being general about the topic and not specific to the story to which he referred. So while I was referencing his topic, I was not referencing that story in particular. I don't believe shooting someone for breaking up with you or being a bitch is justifiable nor did I ever claim to. I'm just saying I would lie to protect my kid in certain circumstances.

[bettyellen]

62. i gotcha, i don't mean any harm. i just noted that somehow you read

that as being a mistake type killing, and i was like wtf?? where is that?
i tell you, a lot of parents would do anything, or look the other way, no matter what. i do understand that. everybody's got different limits, right?
this was interesting, if a little gory!
hey dean is coming up on the daily show....
gotta run, take care.

[MrSlayer]

63. O.K. Cool.

I'm watching too. Nice conversing with you.

[bettyellen]

33. good parents kill?

if you're a murderer, i don't think the adjective good applies anymore.
i guess you'd just hope your kid wouldn't make a habit of it, huh?

[MrSlayer]

45. How does it make me a murderer?

If my teenaged kid makes a mistake (We are going by the OP's premise here) I will go out of my way to protect them. I'm not talking about a casual murder or thrill kill but a genuine accident or wrong place, wrong time incident that went too far. I would not protect my kid if he/she was a psychotic homicidal maniac.

[bettyellen]

46. mr slayer, guilty concience? LOL ! i responded to post #23, not you!

"23. I'd go as far as possible to protect my kids.

I'd lie, steal or kill for them as any good parent would."

and since this post was in regard to the Aruba case, are you assuming somhow this girl who went off with three guys somehow put them in danger or something or had it coming? four people knew it was an honest mistake and couldn't admit it to the police? or maybe take her to the hospital since they're not qualified to pronounce her dead?

[MrSlayer]

48. Ah well it was connected to my post in "My Posts".

So I felt obligated to answer. And I maintain that he was already dead when I got there. Heh.

[bettyellen]

51. oh wait, it WAS you who said they'd kill.

my bad. well, actually i guess yours. good wouldn't begin to describe it.


MrSlayer (1000+ posts) Thu Jun-23-05 07:30 PM
Response to Original message
23. I'd go as far as possible to protect my kids.

I'd lie, steal or kill for them as any good parent would.

[MrSlayer]

53. You wouldn't kill someone to protect your kid?

That's odd, I thought it was a natural parental trait.

[bettyellen]

55. well people assume so much about mothers too, don't they.....

and they would be often wrong. while i truly apprecitate your honesty and realize you knowing someone in jai might lower the bar for whay you'd be cool with. yeah, i don't think i'd particpate in a coverup. no, i wouldn't help hide a body for anyone. i remember a friend getting mad at me for saying i wouldn't do an AJ Cowlings was it? get in the bronco with her if it looked like she had murdered her husband. i have a bit more empathy for the other side. i had a close relative murdered by her ex boyfriend. many of their "mutual" friends lied for him, said they were still dating, she was fucking around behind his back, all sorts of shitty things to make her look bad and deserving of a slaying. they had broken up a year prior and it was pre-meditated. he bought the gun two days earlier. i know i couldn't even lie like that. ever or for anyone. i don't think he'd do it again, but i do think he deserved jail. jeeze, i ran into him at the jersey shore five or six years later and that was a shock.
as you know, being in close proximity to a situation like that makes you examine your heart about these things. but i don't have friends in jail and have never considered killing anyone. to me, it's just so off the charts i couldn't seriously go there. i was pretty disgusted at the friends too.
only in the circumstances of someone trying to kill my kid, or anyone for that matter would i try and kill someone first. and no, i ain't talking about the justice system, or someone who was defending himself against my murderous kid.

[MrSlayer]

57. Well I didn't mean that I would go around bumping off witnesses. Heh.

I understand totally what you are saying and I'd be pissed if I was on the other side too but for my kid I would do it. And again it all depends on the circumstances, there are some things they could do which would make me turn my back on them. This is all moot anyway, my kids are not going to kill anyone unless they have to in the manner you describe.

[bettyellen]

58. then there would be no reason to hide it, right?

on a related note my brother offered to kill someone for me.i mean that he wanted to. i refused the offer. and i think he's glad i did. i do think he would have changed his mind in a few days, but that night, he would have done it, i have no doubt. and he's normally a good guy, just a bot over protective.

[Midlodemocrat]

73. I think I am a good parent.

but I wouldn't do any of those things.

I would steal to feed them if necessary, but I won't lie for them and I certainly wouldn't kill for them.

[SoCalDem]

74. I agree.. It would be hard to watch them go to jail (if necessary), but

if you spend a lifetime trying to teach them right from wrong, and then DO wrong yourself, what was the point?

[nini]

24. After I puked my guts up.. I'd take him in

it would kill me but I would do it.

[HEyHEY]

25. Depends on the crime

[fleabert]

28. Hire a good lawyer and have them turn themselves in...

not a moments hesitation, do not aid and worsen the crime. You continue teaching throughout the life of a child, even when they aren't children.

It upsets me that some would aid anyone, child or not, in hiding a crime such as murder.

[LiberallyInclined]

29. ummmm....it's MURDER.

giving aid would be accessory-after-the-fact...child or no child.


but then- it's an easy decision foir me, because i don't have kids...

if it were my wife who was the killer- it would depend on the circumstances- e.g. if she had killed her lover with whom she'd been having an affair behind my back- she could rot in hell.

child, spouse, family member- i guess the first impulse would be to try to get them labelled as temporarily insane or something somehow.

[RagAss]

34. Blame it on Karl Rove....

[AlCzervik]

36. Get a lawyer and then bring him down to the police station end of story

[seemunkee]

37. Similar to the Samual Sheinbein case

killed someone dismembered the body and tried to hide it then ran to Israel.

My in-laws were friend of the family and were disgusted by their actions.

[SOteric]

40. I don't have children so it's purely theoretical for me.

But I suspect I'd encourage junior to face the music, no matter how frightening that felt, and then move heaven and earth to find and engage the best lawyer on the planet.

[micrometer_50]

54. Easy decision.

I have called law enforcement about each of my children.

:cry:

[mitchum]

64. nothing

[Tsiyu]

65. I would call an attorney and get their story

and proceed accordingly. If they know something that would lead to finding a missing person, they should speak up. If there is a dead body as a result of someone's abuse or neglect or rage or greed, no way would I assist in hiding it.

But if we take the Aruba case as an example, I might be concerned that the child of the more well-to-do -who might actually be the guilty party - would have an economic and therefore a courtroom advantage over my child. I know firsthand that poor kids are sentenced more often and executed more often. So I would bear that in mind.

But guilt is guilt, and I will not harbor a murderer. Funny how * makes that seem like a virtue these days....

[Shell Beau]

69. I don't have children yet so I can't say for sure.

I hope that I would turn them in. It is just the right thing to do for ALL involved. The mother of the lost girl wants desperately to find her child. Loving your child sometimes means doing things you don't want to.

[SoCalDem]

70. Exactly.. How could you look at that kid, knowing that

he had killed someone else's child and you had helped cover it up? The parent-child relationship would be toast from then on.. I would rather visit my kid in jail, than to live every day "knowing" what "we" had done..:(

The thing that gets me is that the kid's Dad is a JUDGE...and has to know the "best" lawyers around.. What faith could anyone ever have in him if his kid manages to escape jail now...when everyone will "know-suspect" that the JUDGE was complicit in some way..

TWO families totally ruined due to teenage drunkeness and lust..how sad..

[Shell Beau]

71. Very true!!

I hope they are able to find her body (assuming she is dead)for her parents sake, but I fear she is somewhere in the ocean.

[SoCalDem]

72. As soon as I heard about the "party boat DJ" in custody

I figured they would never find her body,. I mean, the kid lives there and knows everyone (it's a small island).. They probably called the DJ (who probably had access to the boat)..and the rest is hsitory.. They would also know about currents, so the body would not wash ashors:(

[Shell Beau]

75. I know her mother must be in agony!

I would hate for my child to go missing ESPECIALLY in another country.