Retail workers: post here and you may insult me!

[Bunny]

I'll confess, I have actually done the following things in retail stores:

1. Walked up to a man who was wearing a blue vest AND a name tag, and said "Do you work here?" (duh!) :dunce:

2. Called a store to find out when they open, and when the person answered, I asked "Are you open?" (double duh!) :dunce: :dunce:

3. Found a sales clerk, while standing by a rack marked SALE in no fewer than three places, and asked "Are these on sale?" (triple duh!) :dunce: :dunce: :dunce:

So, go ahead, take your frustrations out on me! I promise I will not ask to speak to your manager. :D

[Mutley]

1. I don't mind when people make honest mistakes like those

you described above. My problem is when customers get that snippy, snotty, you-were-born-to-serve-me attitude.

[Spinzonner]

2. Apparently you failed to read the manual

[Bunny]

3. I cannot believe that no one else wants to insult me!

C'mon, you retail weenies! :D

[purr]

4. I hated it when they threw their money at you...

then held their hand when you give them their change. Totally ignorant.

[Mutley]

5. I put their money right on the counter if they throw their money at me,

whether their hand is out or not.

[purr]

6. I eventually did that... notice how they get pissed? :)

I never met more ignorant people in my life when I worked a retail job.

[Mutley]

10. I love that they get pissed!

But they know they can't say anything because they did the same damn thing to you!

[kick-ass-bob]

7. I did that too.

I also (if there wasn't a line) made then wait a long time while I put their stuff in a bag.

I was never so passive aggressive as when I worked in retail.

:scared:

[Mutley]

11. Passive aggressive is the only way you can be with customers.

Otherwise they "tell" on you and you get in trouble.

[kick-ass-bob]

21. I know, that's why I had to get out.

[Mutley]

30. I can't wait until I graduate.

Six more months, six more months, six more months.

[Liberal Veteran]

24. Are these (insert item here)....

a) fresh (No...we only serve stale food!)
b) tasty (Yes...I taste test all 5 zillion items in the store)
c) really this price (No...the sticker is just there for decoration)

[Mutley]

29. I get

people reading the sale signs wrong. It'll say specifically what the sale is for, but people decide that the sale should also include whatever they are trying to buy and throw a fit when you won't give it to them. READ DAMNIT! And people who get mad because I won't let them return an open item when they don't have a receipt and they can't even give me an approximate date when they purchased it so I can try and find the transaction in the computer.

[Patiod]

8. Point #2 isn't stupid

I've called stores and said "oh, great, you're open" and had the person on the phone say "no, we closed at 5, I'm just here doing xxx"

I've also walked into unlocked stores and had salepeople snap "we're not open"

//Former Strawbridge & Clothier retail person here

[purr]

9. Where I worked we had to be there an hour early on opening...

and HAD to answer the phone incase the DM called. I eventually started telling people that our computers were down until opening time and to call back then.

We had to do WAY to much shit in the hour before opening to answer the phones.

[Liberal Veteran]

12. Did you know that retail workers have magical powers like....

...the ability to cause the price of gas to go up or down, cause your credit card to be declined, and have a huge backroom where all the stuff you really want is?

[purr]

13. or when they want a discontinued product we can pull it out of

our asses!!

[Blue Diadem]

42. Hey..I did that once! Well not quite pulled it outa my um..

but it did kinda feel like it. I ended up finding every sized rug the lady wanted..it was over $2,000 worth back in 1980's dollars. I called every regional manager, warehouse, store that stocked the same as us and was able to have them all shipped to our store. The other stores were happy to get rid of them..and so were we.

I was also a commission sales person, so making people happy increased my sales. I might have only made $60 off that sale but my sales increased as word spread that I'd go out of my way to satisfy customers.

[Bunny]

15. I have long wondered about that. Thanks for confirming my dark

suspicions! :D

[kick-ass-bob]

16. "Don't you have some in the back?"

I said "sure" and opened the door - boxes were piled almost to the ceiling.

"It's in there."

"Oh, I'll just come back another day."

"Good idea."

:rofl:

[Bunny]

17. Oh, I'm guilty of that one too.

I just know you keep all the good stuff in the back!

[purr]

18. LOL that worked for you??

I got 'well, i can wait..' with a huge storeful of people.

[kick-ass-bob]

23. I did get that once.

I told them that it would be 2 days. (which it was)

[Mutley]

34. Lol! When I worked at Toys R Us the stock room would look like that at

Christmas! There would literally be a mountain of boxes, NOT stacked neatly, that we called Mount Crap. And you would have to climb around in it to find things. Good times!

[jmowreader]

46. That's my favorite question too

"Oh, you have this in the back, don't you?"

There IS no "back" at either Lowe's, Menards or Home Depot! All three chains use a racking system like an authentic warehouse; if the product you seek is not over your head or on the shelf, we do not have it.

[Mutley]

33. My store has no backroom whatsoever.

There is a door that leads outside, and everyone assumes that is a backroom. Sometimes when I tell people there is no backroom, they point to that door and say, what about that? I actually had to open the door for this one guy who did not believe me and would not drop it. He felt really stupid.

[jmm]

14. Since you asked so nicely

The only way our jeans, or any pants for that matter, will make you look ten pounds lighter is if I mark the price up so high that you won't be able to afford food for a month.

Yeah I once said that to a customer and no I'm not working in retail anymore. Surprisingly enough though I wasn't fired for that because I was the top seller in the store.

[BearClaws]

20. Working retail...

The ultimate in Sadomasochism.

[Liberal Veteran]

19. My favorite is the people who get all beside themselves when you...

....first start at a job and ask for their ID when they are writing a check.

"I've been coming in here for years...everyone knows me!"

Do these people really believe that the store keeps a poster of regular customers on the back wall and forces the clerk to memorize it before putting them on the register?

[kick-ass-bob]

25. I asked the manager's sister for her ID!

She was OK with it though - we both laughed.

[Patiod]

27. I thank retail people who ask for ID or want to check my signature

So much identity theft going on -- I don't WANT retailers to just take my credit card from any old person who might be handing it to them!

[Liberal Veteran]

28. I had a couple of guys come into the store with a credit card....

....load up the counter with miscellaneous junk, hand me the credit card and I was forced to ask which one of them was "Shirley".

Needless to say, they left quickly without any merchandise.

[Richardo]

22. Oh Bunny. That is hilarious

We don't make fun of self-deprecating customers, just the pains-in-the-ass.

Story: My very first customer on my very first day at the B&N information desk:

She: "I'm looking for a book that my book club is reading, and I'm not sure of the title or author, but it's got a blue cover and it's about terrorists."

Me: *gulp* (Thinking: "I'll NEVER be able to do this job.")

Don't ask me how, but we finally determined she wanted 'Bel Canto' by Ann Patchett. :eyes: At least she was not an impatient pain-in-the-ass. I think she understood that she gave me very little to work with.



And yes, I get a lot of customers who walk up to me while I'm shelving books, look at the name tag around my neck, and ask if I work there. :eyes:

[Richardo]

31. But here's my REAL peeve: Cel phones at the register

Some people even INITIATE the call as they're walking up. :grr: :nuke:

I wonder if we can install some kind of force field that disables all cel phones within 25 feet of a cash register. Maybe as part of the WiFi system... :think:

[Liberal Veteran]

32. But the conversations are always ultra-important....

"Yeah, I am the store...."
"Did you see what she was wearing..."
"Uh-huh...yeah...I saw that on TV last night"

[Bunny]

36. Oh dear. This thread truly is a confessional for me.

I did just the exact thing earlier this week in the bank. I was walking up to the teller to deposit a check when my cell phone rang. The caller ID was my babysitter's number, so I answered, in case there was a problem with the kids. At the same time, I'm handing the teller the check I want to deposit. So, I'm trying to talk to my sitter, while simultaneously telling the bank clerk to deposit the check in my checking account.

After quickly determining that the sitter had no emergency, I hung up. And apologized profusely to the teller - I HATE when people think their cell phone call takes priority over absolutely everything. It's so rude! She was nice about it, I must say. If the situation were reversed, I would have been staring daggers at her.

[Richardo]

39. Manners rule. And make all the difference in the world.

It's the rudeness and arrogance that get to us retailoids.

I actually have a pretty good time with most customers. One of my favorite stories:

I'm at the cash register one Sunday morning when this older couple (in their 70s-ish) walk up with some books. She puts the books down, I ring them up and he swipes the credit card for payment. After a few seconds, he says: "Oh good, they approved me." She replied with a slight smile, "They don't know you like I do."

Made my day. :rofl:

[Bunny]

40. Aw, that's a cute story!

[peacefreak]

43. Richardo, we're members of the same fraternity.

My favorite customer story is the woman who came to Info looking for a book called "Water Seal" by Thompson. I said I was sorry, but I thought she was looking for deck sealant!

[Richardo]

41. The rudeness thing is a two way street too...

For example, I ALWAYS help the in-store customer ahead of a ringing phone, even if it rings the entire time I'm helping them (the person on the phone is hearing music).

Also, some of the younger booksellers try to engage me in conversation while I'm helping someone at the register or help desk. I either cut off the conversation immediately or totally ignore them in favor of the paying customer.

I think most customers appreciate that.

[Liberal Veteran]

26. Do NOT under any circumstances ever go to Home Depot....

....wearing an orange shirt.

[kick-ass-bob]

35. Or Target wearing a red shirt!

:rofl:

[Mutley]

37. At TRU we wore red shirts, as did the people at Target in the same

shopping center. I would go over to Target, and customers there would ask me questions. I got to a point where I would just point at the spot on my shirt that said Toys R Us and keep walking without a word.

[Mutley]

38. Shop lifters are a great part of the job, too.

I like the one lady who was wearing a trench coat on a 85+ degree day and was shoving merchandise under it. When I rounded the corner I startled her and all the crap in her coat fell out and hit the floor. :rofl: She just gave me that deer-in-the-headlights look and ran.

[NMMNG]

44. Actually

#2. Just because a person answers the phone does not necessarily mean the store is open. Sometimes an employee may answer the phone in case other employees need to call out/reach personell/whatever.


Now I've had idjit's ask "do you work here" more than once when I was just shopping in a store. My mistakes in each instance? 1) Wearing a red blouse. 2) Not carrying my purse and not pushing a shopping cart 3) Looking to knowledgeable about where things were (I guess if your eyes aren't glazed over or you seem to know exactly where things are you "must" work there)
;-)

Of course my critical mistake that sometimes gets me snagged is my compulsion to straighten things, particularly when I'm in bookstores. Having worked five years in bookstores I know what a pain in the arse it is to have to continuously straighten up after lazy slobs who mess everything up. Particularly when I'm in line with nothing better to do than wait, I'll reorganize the magazine displays. Sometimes this gets me the "do you work here?" routine.

[LastKnight]

45. during the school year i have a retail job in the town where my school is.

and ive had it in another branch of the company as well. 2 years and counting retail expierence. now i dont claim to be the smartest or most expierenced person on the planet... but one time i was taking too long to make change, or at least taking too long for this lady... i mean afterall, i *WAS* holding her money for a full half second before she got impatient... and she accused me of not being able to count change, went into a big lecture about how one day when the computers and registers would crash i would have to do things in my head. and that i should have not dropped out of highschool and finished those math courses. (mind you, i finished highschool with honors and am in college, let alone wearing one of the schools shirts, albeit a descrete black one with a small logo maybe partially hidden by a nametag, but the word "COLLEGE" was clearly visible).

what adds to the irony of the situation.... is my calculus book is lying in plain sight on the counter next to the register, infact she had to set her purse on it to pay.

we had a laugh about that one.

oh, i had a drunk argue prices with me for 20 minutes... and almost tried to jump me and the other 3 guys there... that was fun.

none of your habbits bother me, by the way... i just come back with stupid/sarcastic replies. but i make it clear im joking