Panic Attacks suck.

[Sannum]

With the current world situation, my current financial situation, my family situation, and the fact that my job search keeps on turning up turds, I was not surprised that everything just caused me to have a huge panic attack.

I want a job. I would be working right now if it were not for Bush and his budget cuts, causing the non-profit agency that I was working for to suddenly have a hiring freeze and let me go because "I had only been there a week". I am either over or under qualified. Fuck them. There was what I consider a betrayal by a headhunting agency, so I am literally down to searching the want ads. I get little nibbles at my resume, but so far, nothing has turned into an actual paying job. When I do get a call about my resume, I am just so pessimistic about it that it probably shows to potential employers. I know I will face rejection, so I might as well put a pillow underneath to protect myself. I am so fucking fragile right now. I am sick of everything. If I don't get something soon, I don't know what I am going to do.

It has been a fucking shitty summer. I have friends asking me what I want to do for my birthday next month and right now, I want to spend it alone at home with my curtains shut. Usually, I would go shopping with friends, have drinks and dinner, but when you are having to prioritize groceries, then you do not have the money to go shopping for fun. I miss that so much. Most of all, I miss having a schedule and waking up in the morning having somewhere to go. I miss having a job to do.

[trumad]

1. Ebay

Now don't laugh, but Ebay.

My wife and I several years ago were both out of a job. We started selling on ebay and did over 40 grand in about 8 months. No lie.

I'm not saying it's the cure all, but it is residual income and you can make good money.

MHOP

[graywarrior]

5. What are you selling?

[tjdee]

11. That's exactly my question, because I don't have anything sellable.

Because it's a buyer's market on ebay. Which is good when I'm a buyer, LOL!

[trumad]

13. Go to yard sales and buy top label clothing like Gap, Baby Kosh, etc.

Research ebay and see what the going prices are for certain things. A big seller for us was Hooked on Phonics sets. We'd buy it at a yard sale for 15 bucks and resell it on ebay for 100 bucks.

Money can be made if you research what's selling and no where to buy the stuff cheap.

[Misunderestimator]

15. I had a friend who bought vintage hawaiian shirts in thrift stores to....

resell them for hundreds of dollars on EBay. I watched one shirt of hers that she bought for $2, sell for $450 on Ebay. It sat at about $100 until the final few minutes of the auction when there was a furious bidding war.

You do have to know what you're selling and be able to describe it and present it well on Ebay.

I've thought many times of doing this myself. If I ever am out of work, that's a good avenue.

[trumad]

18. It is.

That's happened to me a bunch. My item will be at 50 bucks and within the last 2 minutes jump 200 bucks. It's one of the greatest feelings you can have in life.... Then again, meeting you at YBOR rates right up there to. ;-)

[Misunderestimator]

20. Aw... It would be nice to do that again.

But I'm a bit far away now :(

Keep safe in that durn hurricane. :hug:

[graywarrior]

21. When I worked for Goodwill, lots of ebay sellers came in

sometimes 2 or 3 times a day looking for stuff to sell. They made big money, too.

[amazona]

19. ebay several years ago is not ebay today

I had much the same experience as you in 98 and 99.

This year my earnings from EBay have been losses. Too many expenses, and no one wants to pay a fair price any more.

The economy has changed, and I know several people who formerly had good incomes on EBay who are now posting losses.

[BlondieK143]

2. Hang in there.

I've had to come to terms with a recent job blow as well. Look at it this way, things will get better. I know it's a lot easier said than done, but they will. I do know that shutting yourself off to the world isn't the answer. (Trust me, for the past month I've wanted to do just that). I hope that you have a good group of family and friends to support you through this. If not, I'm always here if you need to vent. :hug:

[Deja Q]

3. It's been a fucking shitty life. But what can you do?

[bigtree]

4. You're not alone

thanks for pouring out your woes. hope it helps.

I will say this. Time does pass. Things do change. Hopefully things will turn better, soon!

[GOPisEvil]

6. I can only offer virtual support and a virtual hug.

:hug: It'll get better, I'm sure.

[graywarrior]

7. I've been getting them again lately.

They do suck.

[Qanisqineq]

8. I hear you

Lately, I think my entire day is one long panic attack. Life's a bitch.

[Sannum]

9. Life really, really sucks sometimes.

I wish life were fair. I am a good person and it seems that good people are being punished.

Thanks for tolerating my little rant. I have friends and family, but I can feel their disapproval, even if it is only imaginary.

This has just been a really shitty year. This time last year, I was so happy and optimistic. I thought I had so much to look forward to...A new job, a new city, John Kerry in the WH. The possibilities seemed endless. Now I wonder how I even allowed myself to be so fucking naive.

[graywarrior]

10. Family disapproval, imaginary or not, doesn't help.

I try to cover up my panic attacks and not talk about them to anyone in my family. But lately, the attacks are more frequent and happen during the day instead of at night, so they are harder to hide.

I got a really bad one right after the London bombing...which brought back 9-11 AND 2001/2004 election disappointments.

Don't have any advice except to say you are not alone.

[tjdee]

12. That's where I am....but things have to get better, right?

I do have a job, though. Which I'm fucking up with lately because I'm so stressed/not getting enough sleep/etc.

I don't know that I've had a panic attack yet (what do they feel like, maybe I did?)--but I *am* experiencing a great deal of anxiety to the point of wanting to not leave the house except for work (my car might break down, someone might hit me--and then I'd *really* be up shit's creek.) And I've got a little kid here so that's not good.

So you're not alone, if that helps. And we do have the internets (for now)!
:hug:

Just wanted to add that it's really fucked up because sounds like both our moods would be better if we just had some money. My feelings about money have changed drastically in the past year. I'm waiting for someone to tell me that money doesn't matter/mean much/whatever, so I can punch them in the face.

[Sannum]

14. Exactly

Money would solve a hell of alot of problems that I have. They say that it doesn't bring happiness, but those people do not have to worry everytime they pay a bill or write a check. I don't even want to be rich. If I were to just be comfortable...that is all I am looking for. Just enough to live the somewhat simple life I live, with perhaps a little extra for small luxuries.

I totally with you on the not wanting to leave the house sometimes. Irrational fears about things have really started to plague me. It has never happened before. I just need to work.:eyes:

Thanks to everyone.:hug:

[yardwork]

16. I have panic attacks and I recently did the job search frustration thing

It sounds like you are having a difficult time. I'll share my experience, in the hope that it might help.

I had been seeking a job for a while and getting very frustrated. A friend encouraged me to think of the job-hunt as a job. Get up in the morning and plan your day of job-hunting just as if you were employed to do exactly that.

I picked up a new paperback book called _Get Hired Fast!_. The author encourages people to call the hirers directly. Research organizations/companies and find out where they might be expanding and therefore might be thinking about hiring, then call them and tell them that you have exactly the skills they need. Be specific.

I found a job through contacting a former employer and asking for a reference. It turned out she needed somebody. It took months from the time I first applied until I was hired, but it worked out in the end. It's only part-time and I don't get benefits, but now my foot is in the door and there might be future opportunities to make it full-time. Building a new job is an evolving process.

For the panic attacks and lack of confidence, I strongly recommend some kind of therapy. Even if you have no insurance, try the local Mental Health organization or Community Health Center, where they will treat you on a sliding fee scale based on your income. Try self-help groups. Make a point of getting out of the house every day - even if you only walk around. The exercise alone will do you good. Call friends and relatives every day, even if you only talk a few minutes to check in.

It will work out in the end if you stay persistent. This too shall pass.

Bright blessings on you!

[cassandra uprising]

17. hang in there

:hug: