Then let me rant about people playing instruments in movies

[Rabrrrrrr]

Bouncy is bugged by the fake accents (bugs me, too, Bouncy!)

Another is bugged by the fake Morse code (bugs me, too!)

Another is bugged by the idiots who plug in the wrong bird songs (I'd never notice, so it doesn't bug me)

But what really bugs me is actors playing an instrument in a movie, whether it be violin, cello, trumpet, drums, whatever - and the motions they are making are NOTHING like the music being played. A lot of times, they aren't even in synch at all, like a violinist sawing away while the audio track has a long note...

And I'm even MORE bugged by the actors who aren't even holding the intrument correctly! Sweet mother of God, it would take you ONE DAY - one FUCKING DAY - maybe not even that long, to at least learn how to hold the goddamn thing!

How can I take you seriously if you are playing a character who is supposed to be a musician, and you don't even hold your fuckin' instrument correctly?

For fuck's sake.

[JimmyJazz]

1. Can I add that I hate really BAD Russian accents?

Apparently, I don't have enough posts to start a thread (according to skinner, anyway) and so I'll just add my rant to your.

[Bouncy Ball]

2. OMG THAT BUGS THE SHIT OUT OF ME!!!!

I played violin for nine years and piano for six. It does NOT take that long to learn how to freaking HOLD the instrument (well, not with the piano) so it at least LOOKS like you are playing.

Once I saw someone in a movie pretending to play the violin and they were drawing the bow across the FUCKING FINGERBOARD. The bow wasn't even in the right spot. Apparently not one single crew member, producer, or any one of those hundreds of people that stand around at movie shoots noticed how fucked up that looked.

And can piano players in movies at least pretend to use the pedals?

[Rabrrrrrr]

5. And wind players, it would help if you at least breathed at the right time

Nothing worse than seeing someone take a breath in the middle of a run of notes when they're pretending to play a wind instrument.

[Bouncy Ball]

That makes me laugh.

I swear, this is why no one will watch a movie with me. It's got to be. I get so pissed off or start laughing at the movie's stupidity.

"He's not really playing that."

"What kind of dialect is THAT? That doesn't sound like Oklahoma!"

"Look at that, he didn't even call her back and she KNOWS? That doesn't make ANY sense at all."

Am I just too much of a stickler for details? Too logical to give it up for most movies?

I am NOT a fun person to watch a movie with, I'll admit it.

[Rabrrrrrr]

16. Or people's clothing changing not because it was in the script;

or a car getting wrecked, then you see it later and it's wrecked in a different way (or not at all).

Or stains that change patterns (Kirk's jacket in Star Trek II is a good example of that - three different stain formations are used in the movie)

Or a character who had a watch on, then suddenly doesn't, then suddenly does, then doesn't, then does...

I also notice when people's cigarettes grow longer.

[Bouncy Ball]

18. Ok now that's cracking me up.

That's a level of detail I usually don't notice unless I see a movie more than once. Then I'm uber-obnoxious about it.

Tell me the names of some of your favorite movies and I'm going to do something, ok? Just give me a title or two.

[Rabrrrrrr]

20. Citizen Kane, The Thing, Lawrence of Arabia, Wild Bunch

Star Trek II.

How's that?

[Bouncy Ball]

23. Citizen Kane goofs:

Revealing mistakes: When Leland and Bernstein are inspecting Kane's art purchases, Leland moves a statue which wobbles too quickly for it to be made of a dense stone such as marble.


Incorrectly regarded as goofs: It has been claimed that Kane's last words could not have been known as he was alone in the room. This is incorrect; the majordomo says that he was in the room, heard Kane say "Rosebud", and that when the paperweight slipped from Kane's hand he knew he was dead.


Audio/visual unsynchronized: When Kane shouts at Jim Gettys from the stairwell, it is clear that most of the words he is saying are not coming out of his mouth.


Factual errors: A Japanese newspaper reporting Kane's death contains articles written in Chinese.


Revealing mistakes: When Kane hovers over Jed Leland's unconscious form after Susan's horrible opera debut, the paper in the typewriter had a thumb mark in exactly the same place where Kane will grab it out of the typewriter a few seconds afterwards. Evidently they shot this scene at least once before.


Crew or equipment visible: There is a camera shadow on the large doors to the Thatcher vault as Thompson enters.


Crew or equipment visible: When Kane returns from Europe, he enters the Enquirer news room and rushes towards the camera, which dollies back. At this point, and when he subsequently leaves, the dolly track is visible on the floor.


Revealing mistakes: The long dolly shot from outside the Kane house and all the way back inside through two rooms, ending on the far side of a table, could not have been achieved with the table in place and, instead, the table had to be moved into position once the camera was past. It's an almost perfect illusion except that the hat on the table is still wobbling slightly (from the sudden movement) by the time it comes into shot.


Audio/visual unsynchronized: When Jim Gettys reveals Kane's mistress to his wife, Gettys shouts to Kane, "We've got proof! It will look bad in the papers" Looking closely, he actually said, "...It will look good in the papers..."


Crew or equipment visible: At the party scene where Kane dances with the girls, there are several shots of his reflection in the mirror. The camera shoots directly into the mirror and its silhouette can be clearly seen.


Revealing mistakes: During the picnic scene towards the end, Welles had to shoot against a back-projection because a location shoot was too costly and time-consuming. The stock footage used for the exterior was taken from an RKO horror picture (possibly The Son of Kong (1933), hence on closer inspection the four birds that fly by are in fact very definite pterodactyls. RKO told Welles to take the pterodactyls out of the shot, but he liked them, and decided to keep them.


Continuity: When Mr. Thatcher has Mrs. Kane sign the contract at Mrs. Kane's Boarding House, Mrs. Kane goes over the closed window and opens it. In the first shot, the window could only be raised to the height of Mrs. Kane's shoulders, but in the second, it is above her head.


Continuity: During the office party scene in which Kane welcomes the newly-acquired Chronicle staff to The Enquirer, the gentleman sitting to the left of Kane is wearing a hat which disappears and reappears in subsequent shots.


Revealing mistakes: In the aquarium, a wire holding the 'octopus' is visible.


Errors in geography: When Kane and his friends travel to the Everglades for a camping trip, there is a brief shot of the motorcade heading south down the beach with the sea on the left-hand side of the screen. Because Xanadu was located on the Gulf (West) Coast of Florida, the sea should have been on the right.


Continuity: Before Kane leaves his home, a rope on "Rosebud" is clearly visible. In the shot that fades to the packaging on his new sled at Christmas, the rope has disappeared.


Continuity: When Kane is talking to drunk Leland, he puts his right hand in the pocket. In the next shot, after he walks away from Leland, his hand appears out of the pocket.


Continuity: At the first time on the opera house stage, just before Susan begins to sing, two men pass carrying a litter behind her twice.

[Bouncy Ball]

24. The Thing goofs:

Continuity: The chess moves spoken by the computer don't match the ones on the screen; also screens are shown from different games.


Continuity: There is more ice in the glass when MacCready pours his drink into the computer than in previous scenes.


Continuity: Norwegian pulls the same grenade out of the box twice.


Crew or equipment visible: When the helicopter is chasing the dog, you can see two shadows that are not from the dog.


Continuity: When Blair is being put into the tool shed, the window is seen boarded up when viewed from the outside, but not boarded up when viewed from the inside.


Continuity: Macready's bottle of whisky is completely covered in snow when he leaps into the snowdrift as the chopper explodes, but when he runs to help Bennings in the very next shot, it is totally free of snow.


Crew or equipment visible: On a pull-in through a door to the dog sitting under a table (just before it gets up) the shadow of the camera/cameraman can be seen moving on the wall/door frame.


Continuity: When MacReady goes to check the helicopter after he sees Blair, he is wearing a protective hood. After he hears the gun shot and runs out of the helicopter, his hood has disappeared.


Crew or equipment visible: When Windows is being eaten and mauled by Palmer a brief shot reveals a man holding him above his head in a green tank top.


Factual errors: The place and time are given as "Antarctica, Winter 1982". This, however, makes the several day- and night-sequences depicted in the movie impossible. Even if we assume the station to be located way off the pole (close to the Antarctic coast), the sun still would show up for no more than a few hours of dusk a day in winter.


Revealing mistakes: During the opening sequence where "The Thing" is being burnt onto the screen, a rod is visible in the "T" of "the", which is being used to burn the garbage bag used in the special effect.


Continuity: Childs breaks down the door with an ax, doing extensive damage to it, but several scenes later, the door is intact except for one ax hole.

[Bouncy Ball]

25. Lawrence of Arabia goofs:

Factual errors: At several points in the movie, Turkish soldiers are shown using Browning Model 1919A6 .30 caliber air-cooled machine guns. The Turks would have been using German Maxim machine guns. At other times, they are shown using Short-Magazine Lee-Enfield rifles which were standard issue to the British Empire forces. The Turks would, in all likelihood, have been carrying German Mausers.


Continuity: When Lawrence is showing off in his new Arab dress, the shadows are initially long, but in the next shot have suddenly shortened.


Continuity: When Ali picks up the dead Bedouin's gun on the ground, he grabs it by the handle. The subsequent shot shows him holding it by barrel.


Revealing mistakes: When Lawrence is showing off his new Arab dress, his robes are blowing in the wind. Yet the bushes in the background are completely still.


Anachronisms: When Lawrence arrives at the Suez Canal, the ship which comes into focus is a late-'50s Blue Funnel Line ship.


Factual errors: When Lawrence is being escorted across the desert on his way to Faisal's camp, his Bedu guide offers to share his food with him. Lawrence is somewhat reluctant but is anxious to show that, unlike other Brits, he is at one with the desert people. He reaches into the guide's proffered dish and takes a morsel - but with his left hand, and he does it twice. The Bedu shows no reaction, but he should: among the desert Bedouin tribes, who eat by hand, the left is kept away from the food as it is the hand with which they clean themselves after defecating. It could be that the guide is observing another Bedouin custom, that of warm hospitality and unstinting generosity to strangers, and is too polite to mention the gaffe (he would probably be aware that many outsiders do not know of the taboo), but it is more likely that it is a genuine error. Peter O'Toole is left-handed, and though he goes to great lengths throughout the rest of the movie to do things right-handedly (Lawrence was right-handed), this was probably a momentary lapse that no one noticed, or thought to mention.


Continuity: When Lawrence is crossing the desert with the prince's 50 men he starts to drift off. He is seen looking at his own shadow on the right side of the camel, but in the next shot the shadow is right under the camel. (See also Revealing Mistake)


Revealing mistakes: Further to the change of the shadow position during the "drifting" scene, this shot is of an apparent evening/dusk period where the shadow is almost directly under the camel, revealing it to be a "day-for-night" shot which must therefore have taken place near noon.


Continuity: When Col. Brighton and Lawrence are having a discussion after just having destroyed the train carrying some horses, the shadow on Col. Brighton's face changes from covering his entire face when both speakers are shown and the sun is behind him, to appearing only beneath the collar of his shirt when he is the only person in the frame.


Continuity: When traveling north to Damacus, Lawrence and Ali look to their right to see the artillery at night. The British forces were to their west, which would have been their left.


Anachronisms: When Allenby and Lawrence visit the officers' bar in Cairo, immediately after Allenby says "Shall we go outside?", a modern-day motorized vehicle is briefly visible driving by the distant window in the right-middle portion of the frame.


Revealing mistakes: When Gasim is walking through the sun's anvil after falling off his camel, he begins to shed various items. During a reverse tracking shot, the dolly tracks are clearly visible in the sand.


Anachronisms: Contrail over Damascus when Allenby in discussing the Arab Council on his balcony.


Continuity: In two consecutive shots of Bentley passing by the fountain in Jerusalem, the shadows are completely different.


Anachronisms: During this time period the "Turkish" flag that was shown throughout the film was not the flag of the Ottoman Empire. Rather it is the modern flag of the Turkish Republic, which was founded in 1923.

[Rabrrrrrr]

28. Thanks Bouncy!

Those are all wonderful!

[NoPasaran]

39. But the Ottoman flag (White crescent and star on a field of red)

is the same as the flag of the successor Turkish Republic. However, the biplanes that attack the Arab camp are incorrectly marked as modern Turkish aircraft---actual Ottoman insignia was a black square usually outlined in white.

[Rabrrrrrr]

22. For some reason, I just tend to notice. Not always, but often.

And if I decide to really look for such things, which I do when a movie is obviously cheaply made, then I can find a lot.

[DS1]

43. Maybe they just know how to play the violin better than you, and

your teacher didn't bother teaching you the fingerboard draw technique because she knew you were a lost cause

:hide:

[MuseRider]

3. Damn straight!

Drives me crazy, just nuts. It happens almost every time too, you would think they could do better than that. As if it is not important!

I once saw a wind player with the mouthpiece upside down. The reed was on the top. Blew my mind.

[Bouncy Ball]

4. You reminded me:

at least in Ferris Beuller's Day Off, he really WAS playing badly and that was the point.

All those other movies, where they can't manage any degree of accuracy at pretending just suck.

[MuseRider]

11. I always appreciate

when they take the time to make the shot look correct. Perhaps a camera angle that does not show the fingers. I love it when they have someone on who actually knows how to play or studies enough to look like they do. Did you ever see the movie "The Competition"? I think that was the name with Richard Dreyfus and Amy Irving? I don't remember too much about it except that it really looked like Dreyfus was playing. Probably stunt hands but it was impressive.

I love Ferris playing the clarinet! Cracks me up everytime. And THAT is the reason I was a piano teacher and not a clarinet teacher.

[Ariana Celeste]

6. For fuck's sake, indeed.

x(

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

7. But I really appreciate actors who look like they are playing!

Sam Waterston played a cellist in "The Room Upstairs" and it looked like he was really playing the insrument. I have since found out that his father played cello. I'm thinking Sam took some pointers from Dad for the performance-he was good enough that I'm wondering if he doesn't play the instrument himself!

[Rabrrrrrr]

10. And there's Brent Spiner, who over the course of SEVEN FUCKIN' YEARS

playing Data, a character who was a MASTER VIOLINIST, apparently never felt the need to go spend a half a day learning how not to play over the fingerboard, how to bow straight, how to hold the violin, or how to place one's fingers on the neck.

FOR SEVEN YEARS HE NEVER BOTHERED TO LEARN!

I blame Rick Berman.

[Bouncy Ball]

13. No way.

I never watched that show (Star Trek?) but THAT would totally piss me off.

[Rabrrrrrr]

19. Way! Drives me crazy.

And Spiner is such a dedicated actor otherwise, I don't understand why he never cared enough to learn how. Maybe he just hates the violin.

Or maybe his assholeness got the better of him.

[Bouncy Ball]

21. Glad I never watched it.

Any character described as a virtuoso would at least have to know how to HOLD the damn thing. I love it when I see actors with a violin and the chin rest isn't even under their chin, it's out away from them, like they are holding it as far from their body as they can. Hey Einstein, notice that CHIN REST THINGY?

LOL

[ALago1]

8. Hell Fucking Yes!

Although, I've seen one movie where the actors were forced by the director (Tom Hanks) to take elementary music lessons for their respective instruments. The movie was "That Thing You Do" and the actual band playing scenes were realistic! I was impressed watching the actors who played their guitars actually form the correct shapes with thier hands depending on the chord the song was on. Same goes for the drummer. He was always correctly on beat.

The movie itself was cheesey, but in a good way in my opinion. A good film to watch when you don't have the energy to focus intently.

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

9. Yeah...or Richard Gere's full frontal nudity in American Gigolo

He wasn't even STIFF!

[Bouncy Ball]

15. OMG I KNOW!!!

:rofl:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

26. Rabrrrrr loves a good non sequitur

[Rabrrrrrr]

29. Absolutely!

[tjdee]

12. Bollywood movies are notorious for this. They don't even bother

plugging in the electric guitars!

It's awful. People play violins and don't even move the fingers on the hand holding the violin....they use electric guitars for acoustic guitar music....

Ohh, it hurts.

[bridgit]

14. you mean like nolte & paltrow in 'jefferson in paris'...

'playing' at playing violin & harpsichord :shrug: then i agree

[Orsino]

17. Anyone remember...

...the "Limited Perspective Reviews" on Letterman's show? The segment I recall was an review of Flashdance by an arc welder.

[NoPasaran]

42. I remember that

As I recall, he wasn't too impressed with Jennifer Beales' welding!

[Mutley]

27. I hate when people hang up the phone without saying "goodbye"

or some variation. They just say something like "My boss is a dick" then you see both parties hang up the phone! :wtf: I'd have to call back and say, "Hey, fucker, I wasn't finished talking."

[Bouncy Ball]

30. I don't know why, but my grandmother did that.

If the conversation was over, or she thought it was over, she'd just hang up. She spent most of her life without a telephone, so I think it was just such an odd thing to her.

[Mutley]

31. Aww. That's kinda cute!

[Bouncy Ball]

32. It was kind of WEIRD!

As a kid, I'd say "ok so I guess I'll talk to you lat--"

CLICK.

Yeah, she's done now.

[Mutley]

33. Heehee

Now I think it's even cuter! :rofl:

[Rabrrrrrr]

34. Hehheh - I have an uncle who just hangs up when he's done

Whether the other person had more to say or not, once my uncle is done, he just hangs up. No goodbyes, no warnings, no "well, better you let you go" or "I've talked enough". Nothing. Just *click* and "buzzzzzz*.

Even does it midsentence.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

35. I hate anachronisms in historical films

whether they're material (showing something that hadn't been invented at the time the film is supposed to take place) or behavioral (people displaying modern attitudes that are at odds with actual behavior in that era).

Little House on the Prairie was one of the worst offenders. I loved the books as a child, but I never watched the TV series voluntarily, because as one local writer put it, Laura and Mary acted not like real pioneer children but like suburban brats. However, my parents watched it, so it was inflicted on me when I visited them.

As an Asian studies expert, I also hate it when people get Japan and China mixed up, as in giving Japanese people Chinese names.

As a linguist, I hate it when people who are supposed to be natives of a country pronounce words from that country's language wrong.

Portrayals of both churches and colleges are likely to be full of howlers to anybody who knows these environments.

[Rabrrrrrr]

36. Oooh, the Asian stuff totally irks me as well

[Bouncy Ball]

37. That gets on my nerves, too.

I'm forever saying "they wouldn't have said THAT then!"

[Lydia Leftcoast]

38. One of the cleverest means of avoiding anachronism

I heard this story about 1979. An American woman who had married a Chinese man in 1932 and had lived continuously in China since then was finally allowed to visit relatives in the States after Deng Xiaoping came to power. (She gave a fascinating interview on McNeil-Lehrer.)

A writer who was writing a novel that took place in the 1920s saw a tremendous opportunity to catch any anachronisms that had crept into his writing. (I wish I could remember the name of the book and author.)

He sent the manuscript to this woman and asked her to mark any bits of dialogue that contained expressions she had never heard.

[gmoney]

40. My Dad rants about cheap camera gear and bad technique

F'rinstance, his wife dragged him to see "Bridges of Madison County" where Clint Eastwood is supposed to be this world-famous National Geographic kind of photographer, yet the prop people gave him a bunch of second-rate gear, and a shaky little tripod. Plus, instead of extending the legs of the tripod to get it up to the desired height, they used the centerpost (which can be a lot more wobbly).

He's gotten me to look for it now, too!

[chaska]

41. If you get the chance check out 'Anastasia' w/ Yul Brenner and Ingrid.....

Bergman. Yul is incredible in that movie. He plays guitar (amazingly well) while simultaneously singing live in one scene. That guy was freakin' amazing.

[Blue-Jay]

44. Forrest Whittacre did a pretty good job in "Bird"

But, yeah, most movies/TV shows SUCK at showing people who are supposed to be playing instruments.

[ProfessorGAC]

45. I Admire The Opposite!

When someone is playing in a movie and their hands or breathing is at least close to what we're hearing, i think very highly of that actor.

Ralph Macchio in Crossroads did a great job. The guy in "The Pianist" didn't really play that stuff, but he did an awfully good job of faking. Another one is Brent Spiner, (Data from Star Trek) who, when playing violin, does a really good job. And, he admitted he can't play a note on violin.

Now some don't count, like "That Thing U Do" or "Light Of Day" or "This Is Spinal Tap" because those folks were really playing.

But, when someone takes the time to get as close as the can to the general movement needed to get a certain sound, i think that's cool.
The Professor