A note from a Newbie

[ClusterFreak]

I've been at the DU now for a couple of weeks, and am just wondering how long it took most of you - when you were new - to get embroiled in your first discussion room heated disagreement? I've now had mine and although I felt compelled to defend my position...after a few back and forth exchanges I also felt like I had just learned an important lesson: Avoid the temptation to embroil yourself in an ongoing circular dialogue with a fellow DU'er who has really wrinkled your feathers. Open debate amongst generally like-minded individuals I know is welcome here, but sometimes - people help me out here - you're going to run into someone who simply wants to argue with you....forever. In my case, we ended up way off the point originally in dispute...and though I felt dragged into it...I did indeed go along, and in the end felt like I had been suckered. I wasted my energy arguing further and further downstream from the original topic. My fault, and now I know better. Make your point, defend it maybe once or twice, and walk away if you feel your being lured into an argument for argument's sake.

Any thoughts?

[lukasahero]

1. My very first post here

got torn apart by someone (don't remember who any more).

I think you learned the same lesson I did - you have to defend your opinions to some degree, but also know when to walk away. Good luck here. :hi:

[ClusterFreak]

9. Thanks lukasahero!!

:toast:

[ret5hd]

2. why the hell would you say that?

are you against freedom of speech or something?
Do you have any defense of your position?

[JimmyJazz]

3. you forgot your sarcasm smilie

[ret5hd]

7. oops...figured it was obvious. (nt)

[JimmyJazz]

10. maybe not to a new person whose ass is still smoking from

being flamed :D

on edit: can't type today

[no name no slogan]

11. Why do you hate America?

You, you, you,.... America-hater!
:P: :hi:

[no name no slogan]

4. Took me about ten minutes

I first got into the fray in the fall of 2003 when the primaries got in gear. I got pretty good at defending Dennis Kucinich in that time, and I'm sure I stepped on a lot of toes to do so :o.

Just remember, it's nothing personal. Even people of like minds who agree on most issues will disagree from time to time. There's even some people who I will gladly disagree with, just because they're great at debating, and I like to watch their minds work.

At the end of the day, it's just a message board after all. :D

[GalleryGod]

5. You Should've been here the Summer of '03

:mad: :nopity: :argh: :wtf: Hot ! Hot ! Hot!

[MissMillie]

6. welcome to DU

I don't get into too many heavy discussions. I'm mostly a lounge lizard. I have gotten into a couple of disagreements with people, but I tend to drop things rather than stay too embroiled in a heated discussion.

[JimmyJazz]

8. Sure. I have some thoughts.

First, Welcome to DU :hi:

I've only ever been engaged in a couple of flame wars, but they can be rather exhausting. The problem is sometimes people insist on having the last word. You need to just walk away from those kinds of people.

The other night, I was in a thread and posting throughout it and a poster insisted on having the last word in three different places. It was upsetting and I felt I was being baited, but I just had to let it go. If it made him or her feel like a bigger person, then fine.

I hope your experience hasn't soured you on DU. In general, this is a great site and a great group of people.

[ClusterFreak]

16. Thanks JimmyJazz!!

...ya I let myself be baited, and I won't anymore. Let the baby have his bottle. Anyway, yes this is a great place and for sure the majority of people are great!

:yourock:

[Maddy McCall]

12. Once, when I was out of town, I registered under a new user name...

because I didn't have access to my regular user name while on the road.

I posted a couple of posts, and, because I was perceived to be a newbie, several people tagteamed me. When I told them who I was, I think it got off with them.

Welcome to DU. We are seeing an influx of people very dissatisfied with Bush, and we should welcome them instead of raise our hackles everytime they don't post exactly what we think they should.

:toast: Welcome.

[JimmyJazz]

14. I remember that! I'm still laughing!

:D you freeper, troll <j/k>

[Maddy McCall]

15. I was sitting in the hotel room thinking...

:wtf: is wrong here. I had just posted that I was Maddy McCall not long before the "incident." LOL! It was funny.

[ClusterFreak]

18. thanks Maddy!!

:)

[Misunderestimator]

23. Who the hell are you?!?

:D Just kidding... :hi:

[Maddy McCall]

24. Why should your fucking opinion matter?

You freeper lesbian!

:pals:

[Misunderestimator]

26. LMFAO... Sorry but that is an oxymoron!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

:pals:

[hyphenate]

13. When I first got onto the board

it was mid 2001 and we didn't really argue much, because we were so pissed off and devastated that we actively sought out fellow Dems and liberals to have the comfort of company.

It's gotten a lot more hairy since then, in terms of how much emotion is now employed in some threads, but we all pretty much still love each other for who we are, because in the end, we're still all part of the same philosophy.

I usually walk away when there is an argument, mostly because I am too tired to do much else. I will often put someone on ignore if they piss me off too much.

[redqueen]

17. A few hours?

But then I joined during the primaries. :D

[Maddy McCall]

25. Oh, man, that was a hideous time to join. I made it in a year before...

...the primary wars...got to know people before all hell broke loose or I would have left this place.

If you weren't for candidate X then you were a pink tutu, a closet Republican, or DLCer, whatever, but definitely NOT the quality Democrat-and-or-liberal as Candidate X's supporters were.

That was an awful time. Glad we all made it through it. :D

[demosincebirth]

19. Some on DU are just as far to the left as some righties are to the right.

...and are just as hard headed. I assume it was one of these you got into a discussion with.

[taught_me_patience]

20. almost immediately...

happens a lot when you are a strong wal-mart supporter.

[XemaSab]

21. Not long at all

Some jerkwad called me out on like, my 5th post, and I accused them of instigating, and the mods stepped in and called ME out for calling THEM out for instigating.

Baptism by fire.

:-D

[Bossy Monkey]

22. Welcome to DU! When a reply to your post pisses you off, go away for

at least an hour before replying. That'll allow your brain to assemble a more cogent reply or anyway a calmer one. If the person comes back with another combative reply, just tell 'em you're not here to argue for argument's sake and wish them well. "You may be right" is the classic shutter-upper for assholes, both online and in real life.

Oh, to answer your question, it was somewhere in my first week and first 100 posts. Waded into the gun dungeon. Never again!

[hickman1937]

27. I was told that I had no credibility because of low post count.

I let it go. Once I was double teamed, something that still infuriates me when I see it because its bully behavior. Just don't engage.

[youspeakmylanguage]

34. That's a violation of The Rules...

You can't tell a newbie he or she is a newbie. It's a strange rule but one that I guess makes sense.

[bigwillq]

28. Welcome to DU!

:hi:

[baby_mouse]

29. Cool!

I've been looking for something like that since I started. Now I've got 300+ posts and I only recently got into a spat. Unfortunately it was a very silly one and I rapidly realised I was wasting my time. Also, I was extremely rude...

[Bouncy Ball]

30. He or she is talking about me.

And he or she hardly got flamed.

I wasn't arguing for argument's sake, I hardly have the time or energy for that. I choose my battles carefully and do not get into debates much on DU. But your point was one I felt needed to be addressed and address it I did. You chose to answer back, I chose to answer that, it's called discussion.

If you felt that was you being suckered, maybe a discussion forum isn't the best use of your time, because that is what happens on a discussion forum: discussion.

Sometimes people reach agreement, more often they reach an impasse. There's nothing wrong with that, either.

Just be aware that if you state an opinion you will at times be called on to defend it and/or elaborate on it. Our little exchange was nothing compared to some of the sub-threads I have seen in GD; I got the sense you just didn't like the fact that I kept responding to you. You wanted to have the last word and render me speechless, but unfortunately, as you can see, that rarely ever happens. ;-)

There's also the ignore button. I recommend its use if there are posters you just can't handle.

[glarius]

32. I saw the thread where you two got into it.....you didn't make much sense

some of the time....You seem to like the sound of your own voice (if you know what I mean). I thought Chimpy's last stand answered everything pertinent that you said....That's all...Nothing more to say.....No offense....I'm off to do some shopping....

[Bouncy Ball]

36. And I thought what you posted just now was pretty smarmy

no offense...I'm off to do some reading...

:rofl:

Actually Chimpys Last Stand never seemed to understand (or refused to understand) what I was saying: that saying walldude was "asking for it" was a specious argument at best. I was questioning his/her line of reasoning there and he/she just threw out stuff about Rove etc. There's no law saying Chimpy had to keep coming back for more, now is there?

I can't hear my voice on-line, missy (if you know what I mean).

[CitrusLib]

31. Unfortunately, I can't help but rise to the bait.

I was on an internet debate board for almost 5 years. It was absolutely fascinating watching the relationships develop. There were people I ALWAYS tangled with, some I ALWAYS agreed with and some that I didn't see eye to eye on every issue with. Then there were the trolls who liked to stir up the shitpot. I loved it. The further off the original topic it got, the funnier it often became. I could always remind myself, this is the internet. As anonymous as we want it to be (or hope it to be), so who cares what the others thought of me really. Is that cynical?

Welcome to DU

:hi:

[youspeakmylanguage]

33. I understand...

I mentioned this in another post recently - many on the far left are just as uninformed, bigoted, and nasty as those on the far right.

I am a moderate liberal, on some issues more moderate and on some issues less. There are more than a handful of people here who want nothing more than to butt heads with me or anyone who is to the right of them on a particular issue, even if that person is only slightly to the right. Most of the time, if those people were to venture any further to the left they'd find themselves stuck in the cold Siberian winterland of communism.

It's a fact of life - as*holes come in all shapes, colors, nationalities, languages, and yes, political persuasions - even your own.

[enigmatic]

35. Welcome

This board, like any other board (more so beccause it's politically driven)have posters who love to argue about anything, at anytime. Some just simply want to get a rise out of "you" or anyone that they spar with; don't take it personally. When you run into somebody like that; don't waste the energy; it isn't worth it IMO.

And when it gets too hot in GD or anywhere else here, come to The Lounge and relax:)

[Midlodemocrat]

37. Locking.

I think this thread has served its purpose.


Thank you.

DU Moderator.