I hate going on vacation

[bleedingheart]

I know I should be excited
I know I should be happy to go to the beach...

But I am just pissed off right now and if I could get my money back I would.

It is the same old run around and I am sick of it...

I am the one who:

makes the reservations
stops the mail
stops the paper
makes sure all the important bills are paid
assures the hamster has a home for the week
the daycare center knows we won't be around
i pack for the entire family
i even make the eye appt so my husband get can his sunglasses (prescription) so he isn't suffering during his break...and I make sure we get him to the eye glass store so he can get them before we leave
i am now making the last minute appt for the car so that it is serviced and the tires are inspected/replaced and the oil changed before we go on our trek
i am the one making sure that the house is secured and that the neighbors know where we are and how to reach us...


and what do I get...

Grief and Yelling...cuz the kids are pissy and the husband is such a freaking work-aholic that going on vacation is a problem...cuz we all know the world will come to a halt if he isn't around to work...


I get all this grief and angst...so that everyone else can get in the freaking car with nary a care in the world....and drive off....

the real icing on the cake is if I forget to pack something...then I get the ..."well that's just great...you didn't pack xyz"

[demnan]

1. I think you need a vacation away from your family

try separate vacations next year. Your husband can just work and just send the kids to some camp, they'll be happy to get back to you. Then check into an indulgent spa in a pretty place for a week or two.

[Coventina]

5. Yep. A trip to "Rancho Relaxo" is definitely in order.

:D

[dhinojosa]

8. Hi! I'm Troy McClure!

You might remember me from such movies as "Today We Kill, Tomorrow We Die" and "Gladys the Groovy Mule"!

Our tour starts in your very own room, where Relaxo-Vision offers you
the latest Hollywood hits. And after midnight, the finest R-rated movies Europe has to offer! Today's selections are...

Some other announcer:
Thelma and Louise,
The Happy Little Elves Meet Fuzzy Snuggleduck, and
The Erotic Awakening of S.


:rofl:

[Heidi]

2. Why do you take on so much?

_Your_ quality of life is worth something, too. Is it totally out of the realm of possibility for you to take a vacation _alone_ sometime? :pals:

[bleedingheart]

6. I have no clue why I am such a dumbass and a glutton for punishment

I really don't.

To be honest I should really just have let the summer go by with no plans...and then when October rolled around and the husband says.."hey...we didn't go anywhere this summer"...I could have said.."geez...guess you should have made plans"...

vacation alone is no go..got small kiddies who I like being around and they really aren't to blame for not being able to pack...(although they try to help)...

[Heidi]

11. I don't think you're a dumbass OR a glutton for punishment.

But in my previous life (first marriage many years ago), when I was married to a man with four kids, I was living exactly as you do now. What I later learned was that I didn't trust anyone else to get everything done or to make sure things went smoothly. I got a lot happier when I let go of some of my irrational need to control.

Don't beat yourself up. You're neither a dumbass nor a glutton for punishment. I'll send you some good vibes . . . :pals:

[bleedingheart]

26. today i had my neice come over and help my little ones

pick out their clothes...so that is at least done...and she is helping me take care of the munchkins while I finish up some work stuff and take care of some other incidentals...

[Heidi]

30. Hang in there, gf.

I'll send you some good vibes, for what they're worth. :hug:

[bleedingheart]

35. thanks....

i needed that....

[JimmyJazz]

3. You sound completely stressed and exhausted.

I'm sorry. :( You need a vacation from your vacation.

[babylonsister]

Aw, bleedingheart...

:hug:

I feel the same way about Christmas. Buying, schlepping, wrapping, sending, pain in the arse and happens every year.
I hope you get to read a good book uninterrupted, and get to work on a tan!

[bleedingheart]

7. oh i did finally scrap "traditional christmas" for the same reasons

I got tired of being the slave who buys the shit, wraps it and then makes sure that all the glitterati of christmas is arranged ...

[GOPisEvil]

4. Reading that makes me think of this:

I think you're all fucked in the head. We're ten hours from the fucking fun park and you want to bail out. Well I'll tell you something. This is no longer a vacation. It's a quest. It's a quest for fun. I'm gonna have fun and you're gonna have fun. We're all gonna have so much fucking fun we'll need plastic surgeory to remove our godamn smiles. You'll be whistling 'Zip-A-Dee Doo-Dah' out of you're assholes! I gotta be crazy! I'm on a pilgrimage to see a moose. Praise Marty Moose! Holy Shit!

From "Vacation"

Take some alone time at the beach, You need and deserve it.

[NoPasaran]

18. Did you ever read the original "Vacation"?

Which was published as a story in the National Lampoon? Somewhat darker (though I thought funnier) ending than the movie.

[Bunny]

9. And when you get back, who will do the following:

-all the dirty laundry?
-unpack the remaining things?
-replenish the food supply at the house?
-cook the first meals?
-get the hamster back?
-retrieve the mail, and sort through it?

I'm guessing it will be you, huh? It was ever thus.
Your hub may take the car to the car wash, and feel like he's really done his share!

I'm sorry you're going through this, you will definitely need a vacation from your vacation! :hug:

[bleedingheart]

10. of course..

cuz I am the complete dumbshit...

and if I ask for help...guess what...it is a 3 way split on how it works...
33% - okay with it...
33% - might help but will bitch
33% - will have to basically nag or walk someone through the task...

my favorite this year is the promise to "take care of the car"...yeah right...so when I mention the car yesterday I get the "oh fuck...the car...i forgot about it...goddamn it..."...but I have no clue that it will be addressed so I make an appt to take care of it because I know if I don't...we might have a problem..

[Bunny]

13. Sure seems to be the plight of the mom/wife, huh?

When I was a kid, my Dad owned a camp up in Cook Forest. The camp had electricity and a fireplace, but no running water. We had to use an outhouse! Anyway, Mom would have to get seven kids packed, plus all the food we'd need for a week, and whatever else was involved in this. And then when we got there, she had to cook and clean up after NINE people with NO RUNNING WATER!!! We helped some, but it wasn't near enough to make the 'vacation' fun for her. No wonder we only went a few times - the woman is a saint! (My Mom---> O8) )

Take comfort in knowing that someday your kids will remember you well for doing this. :D

[Flaxbee]

17. I hate that last 33% - having to nag and supervise

while someone does a task... It's just me and my husband, no kiddos, but he NEVER EVER does any housework unless I ask, then I have to pester him to do it when I ask, and then he doesn't "know" how to do it... I try to be patient, and not a martinent and uber-picky, but damn, if you're gonna do the dishes, WIPE UP THE SPILLED/SLOSHED WATER AFTERWARDS and fold the damn dish towel!!!!

And he says he'll "do anything I ask him to do" - fine, terrific - but damnit, sometimes I want him to notice that the laundry basket is overflowing and needs to go downstairs, or the clean laundry needs to come upstairs, or the litter box needed to be scooped, etc. I don't wnat to have to ask for basics like that! ARGH!

All that aside, I hope you do get to enjoy your trip. If anyone bitches about stuff you forgot to pack, it's just "Sorry, hon." No guilt on your part, they just have to deal with it.

[bleedingheart]

24. oh god I hate that...

my husband is an intelligent individual....and i hate the idea of nagging him...why should I nag an adult about cleaning up something in a house we share...especially when he offers to help?

[XemaSab]

12. Go on vacation without the little shits

Leave dad and the kids at home and send 'em a postcard of some hunky guys.

[readmylips]

14. Lucky you're not going by RV....

Going on vacation in our camper, it's not just packing the clothes and all the above you mentioned, I am packing a full house on wheels, and it takes at least three weeks of hard work. I got to wash and change the beds inside the RV. Bring all the dishes inside the house and wash them in the dish washer and carry them back to the RV and put them back in order. Shop, shop, shop and make sure my hubby does not forget tools and all essentials needed on the road.

Plus make sure my huge house stays in order and clean. I don't like coming back to a dis-orderly house.

Then we return from vacation....again the whole RV has to emptied out and stored....etc.

My best vacation is at home. Like right now, my hubby is on vacation with his four grandkids.

[bleedingheart]

15. I view RV's and vacation cottages as more work than pleasure

for all the reasons you stated...

[ernstbass]

16. One word: delegate

[bleedingheart]

25. read post #10...

he volunteered to take care of the damn thing and yet it falls off the radar and now I gotta do it....

[Montauk6]

19. Ohhhh yeeeaaaaah, the travel prep can be HELL!

AIR TRAVEL EDITION:
I hate packing!
I hate lugging the suitcases!
I hate struggling to get to the airport the recommended 2-3 hours before takeoff!
I hate checking the bags!
I hate the inconsiderate boobs who refuse to check their suitcases and fill up the overheads!
I hate the lack of legroom!

ROAD TRIP EDITION:
I hate packing!
I hate lugging the suitcases!
I don't mind too much the NJ Transit train ride to Newark Airport to pick up the car (because I hate driving in Manhattan)!
I hate figuring out which CDs to bring (though satellite radio REALLY helped out last time)!
I hate driving and perusing the ratty old triptiks!
I like it once we're well onto the freeway!
I hate fighting sleep and the need to wizz!
I hate having to put my shoes back on when we've pulled over to the travel plaza (but I love that park-and-get-out stretch, esp. with the cold night air)!

[proud2BlibKansan]

20. "This too shall pass"

I understand completely. My husband became more involved in vacation prep after the year we got to our destination only to discover the kids had forgotten to put his suitcase in the car. It is funny now but boy was he pissed.

Now the youngsters are grown and once a year hubby and I still go somewhere together. And we really look forward to it. The kids stay here and take care of the dog. And hubby and I get a whole week together free of domestic distractions.

The most stressful period in my life thus far was when my kids were young. Things I enjoyed became dreaded activities. Reading a book meant trying to concentrate while hoping the kids were not burning the house down. Going to a party and seeing friends meant looking for a babysitter we could afford and trusted. Going out to eat was just avoided entirely. We couldn't really afford it and didn't want to deal with whiny kids in a restaurant. (And I swear no matter how calm they seemed when we left the house, one of them started to whine in that restaurant.)

Vacations were the worst. You described it to a tee.

Just remember, this too shall pass. Your life will be all yours once again. Then you will miss these years.

[ElsewheresDaughter]

21. getting my son into the car to leave for vacation.....pic

[mvd]

22. That's too bad

Because vacations are designed as escapes. Tell them if they want the vacation enough, they'll have to help out. I'm about to go on vacation to Charleston, SC with my family, and we are all packing our own things.

Same thing with Christmas. I gladly help with decorating the house.

[RedstDem]

23. Damn, We Live On Opposite Worlds

Will You Marry Me ?
You Got All The Bases Covered..& I Won't Whine If Somethings Left Behind.

[Midlodemocrat]

27. I hear ya.

This year, we went on a couple of nice trips prior to the summer. One, a cruise was awesome and I can't wait to do it again.

This summer, due to circumstances beyond my control, we are having an 'at home' vacation. I can't friggin' wait. No packing, no worrying about the house, no fighting in the car, no decisions to make other than where we eat for dinner.

We are both taking a week off from work to play around here. Something we have never done. I am looking forward to it so much, I am giddy.

[bleedingheart]

29. sounds wonderful!

i don't know why we are leaving....we have a nice house a hotspell is passing through and we have a pool....just like the southern beach we are going to....

[Midlodemocrat]

32. That is what finally got to me as well.

It is very hot here, in Richmond, we belong to the swim and tennis club which is better than some resorts and within walking distance to my house, there are many, many things around here that I just haven't had a chance to do, like see the new collection at the Fine Arts Museum, try a new restaurant, etc. So we are going to pretend that we are out of town. We will eat breakfast at home, but lunch, dinner are going to be at new places.

That way, my eldest can go field hockey tryouts and not be stressed about not making the team due to a vacation, I won't be spending a fortune to stay in a hotel room that is the size of a closet, I won't have to board the dog, and I might actually get to relax.

[youspeakmylanguage]

28. Thanks for again reaffirming why I don't need or want kids...

:thumbsup:

[bleedingheart]

31. actually....the kids are the only ones keeping me "up"

cuz their excitement about crabs, sand and ocean is the only thing that makes it worthwhile....

their pissy-ness came from the fact that dad is being a huge curmudgeon...

[youspeakmylanguage]

33. As a relatively young curmudgeon myself...

...I need peace, quiet, and urban exploration* on my vacations - things that would clash horribly with kids. But I'm glad you're fond of yours.

*My fiance and I usually vacation in large cities, like Boston or Seattle, and enjoy the museums, restaurants, and bars.

[bleedingheart]

34. just to make you laugh...I must share my Colonial Williamsburg experience

imagine this....me pregnant (5-6mos along) with a 2.5 year old boy wearing a cute tri-corner hat....

me and the hubby decide that he is "grown up enough" to tour the governor's mansion.....

We get through about 2 rooms....then....

the 2.5 year old decides he must sit down...and not just anywhere...but on a period piece of furniture....we try to keep him off the furniture and then he starts screaming bloody murder during a colonial re-enactment (powdered wigged folks....etc..)

I try desparately to vacate...but the williamsburg lock on the damn door won't work....and then finally we break free....

from there ...it got worse...