Pondering One of Life's Mysteries

[Liberalynn]

Why is it that when you ask something nicely you usually get ignored but when you start to get impatient and nasty, you tend to get an answer? Yet people claim they don't like harping and bitching?

I mean I have been doing the nice polite thing all my life, and never got any attention. Well except maybe by my kindergarten teacher who smacked me around, and a sixth grade teacher who called me a doormat. Was I handling things wrong until now, should I just stomp my feet and loudly demand what I want?

Hey it got us a table in a resturaunt when one of my family members did it after being told we'd have to wait, and then in another situation I'd been asking and asking a question, and was being ignored and finally I through a little hissy fit, of how I was sick of hearing about this that and the other thing, and wanted the answer to my question, and boy did that get a response.

I know all things have to be used in moderation but what do you think gets you action, being nice or being demanding?

I do tend to feel quilty though when I am being demanding. Even though it works, I'm still not sure it is right or that I feel comfortable with it. It just sometimes feels like it is the most effective way.

[achtung_circus]

1. The squeaky wheel, etc. nt

[Liberalynn]

2. There is that

:)

and on the other side there is "you catch more flies with honey than vinegar," but then again who wants flies anyway? ;-) I've tried honey for so long, maybe I should add some more vinegar.

[achtung_circus]

3. I'll try nice first.

I want to believe the best of people. If someone tries to walk on me, though, this wheel can get squeaky real quick.

[Ready4Change]

4. When it's just me ...

When it's just me, nice usually works best. But, when I and a nasty person are looking for the same thing, the nasty person is usually taken care of first.

Now, do they get taken care of BEST? That varies. And that also makes a big difference on whether I ever return to that place of business or not.

Further, if a place of business tells Mr. Nasty to take a hike, as they don't wan't/need customers like that, I will go out of my way to return to that place of business.

That's my .02

[Liberalynn]

6. I had a manager once

when I worked at Sears over the holidays tell a customer to sop being nasty. The customer was being rude to several of we clerks because she was demanding something that was against store policy. The manager told her to leave the store and not return until she could learn to behave appropriately to the store's employees who were only doing their job. She said no employee who worked under her was going to get treated that badly. I was quite impressed with that.

In the case of the resturaunt table this is the second time we had gone to try and eat there and they acted like they didn't want to seat us. We have a sneaking suspicion that they didn't think we looked "High class" enough. But hey no one was dressed in suits and ties, it is a resort town, we had freshly washed non revealing shirts and shorts and shoes, and the money to pay for our dinner and leave a good tip, and it wasn't like they were overwhelmed. I think it was either the high class stuff or that they just didn't feel like working a table with six people.

In some situations I think they pay attention to the squeaky wheel just to get them out of their hair and away from other customers quickly.

[sendero]

5. I know exactly how you feel..

... I'm really Mr. Nice Guy in real life, up until I think someone is trying to treat me shabbily.

I've found on occassion, that when dealing with retailers and such, you have to huff and puff a little to get their attention.

I don't like doing it, but I'm quite good at it if I have to :)

[Liberalynn]

7. It is a skill

I think I am going to have to learn to use it too when I know I am being stepped on.

It's good you have the ability to do it.