Bless Her Heart...

[arwalden]

Someone recently explained to me that it's easy to get away with harshly criticizing (or insulting) family members, neighbors, co-workers... as long as you add the phrase "bless his heart" or "bless her heart" at the end.

It's like verbally tossing someone out of a window, but the "bless their heart" comment is a way to cushion the impact.

- My friend Judy is such an clueless idiot, bless her heart.
- My uncle Joe is disturbingly homely, bless his heart.
- My mother in law is a no-good busybody, bless her heart.
- That boy ain't right, bless his heart.

Have you ever heard of this before? Do you know anyone who does it already?

[Texasgal]

1. :bless your heart"

Is a nice southern way of saying " Kiss my ass" :hi:

[supernova]

3. Yep,

what she said.

It can mean the surface meaning too, expressing caring. But it is also used as an insult.

I once had a coworker who thought about writing a book illustrating all the ways you can use "Bless your heart." I don't know if he ever did it or not.

[Spider Jerusalem]

2. That's a Southern (and, generally, female) thing, in my experience.

I've encountered it...it's a polite way of sticking in the knife and still sounding like a good, church-going Christian.

[Texasgal]

4. Your right about it being female

I've rarely heard a man say it... my Grandmother ( the last of the true southern bells ) used to say it all of the time!

[steely]

5. I think it has to be delivered with a smile for the full effect.

but I'm just not that good of an actor to pull it off.

[ScreamingMeemie]

6. My mother in law is the guiltiest of the guilty with this phrase.

My daughter in law (bless her little heart) never seems to be able to get the laundry done.

The next door neighbor, bless her sweet heart, is annoying as hell after 10 PM...

I could go on. It angers me, because my heart gets blessed at least 10 times any given month. :hi:

[Ariana Celeste]

7. Oh yes. My Gramma and her family,

are from Alabama. So as someone else said, think it's a Southern thing. I've heard it from my Gramma many times, but she is never very mean about it. And she means well. :)

[Heidi]

8. Where I grew up, that was called a "back-handed compliment."

"She used to have such lovely hands, before the liver sports started up, bless her heart."

"He used to be such a good provider, bless his heart."

It's a southern thing, I think.

[Dastard Stepchild]

9. You can also use the British version, "as you do."

As in:

"She was out wearing a large striped caftan with leopard print ankle boots, as you do."

:)

[arwalden]

10. I Heard That Often When Graham Norton Would Talk To Audience Members...

... on his television talk show.

[Dastard Stepchild]

11. Yes!

And Eddie Izzard is fond of it as well. :)


I picked it up when I was over there, and I am rather guilty of using it on... well, "occasion" just doesn't quite cut it. Let's just say it features a tad too prominently in some of my discussions. tsk-tsk.. B-)

[Mayberry Machiavelli]

20. Who is Izzard and what is his deal? He was on "The Aristocrats" which

I saw last night (loved it), but was largely incoherent.

[Greyhound]

21. He is a British, executive transvestite, stand-up comic, actor.

He is really funny, if you like that sort of thing. Very Euro. :rofl:

edit: Since he's been getting Amerikan $, the transvestite part is being downplayed.

[tjwmason]

17. As you do is more like twisting the plunged knife

Whereas 'bless her heart' implied a dash of faux concern/patronising indulgence - we also have the even more patronising 'bless his little cotton socks'.

[Dastard Stepchild]

22. True... true...

There is the subtle, but important, difference! :)

[miss_kitty]

12. here's one I like to use:

"He is SO stupid. And I mean that in the kindest way possible"



OK. OK. your "Bless her heart" is 'nice' and "I mean that in the kindest way possible" is just more mean. :D

BTW, "Bless her heart" is just a way to turn a mean statement into a passive-aggressive one. Usually people her use it seem to be nice. But may not be. Bless their hearts.

[Orangepeel]

24. or "I don't want to be mean, but..."

which is like, "no offense, but"

[In_The_Wind]

13. I see that you've been talking with one of my best friends again.

or is it just that many of us Southerners still talk that way

[Midlodemocrat]

14. My fundie neighbor says this all the time.

"That Rick is such a cheating piece of shit, bless his heart".

"Her new haircut looks awful, bless her heart".

You get the idea.

[arwalden]

15. Your Neighbor Must Be A Real Piece Of Work...

... bless her heart.

[Midlodemocrat]

16. She's a complete nut case

...bless her heart.

[hippiechick]

18. Yes, Hoosier-speak ...

... "she's so stupid she failed the first grade, God love 'er" ...



:hi Arwalden !!!! :hug:

[arwalden]

19. Yep... I've Heard That Variation Too.

Hi Sweetie :hug: God luv ya!

[July]

23. My mother's technique is to laugh after the insult.

Often elicits a laugh from the listening party.

It's the same deal. Passive-aggressive way to elicit support for a mean remark.

Ex.: You know how lame your brother is, hee-hee. If I laugh with her, I'm giving her tacit agreement.