In the spirit of things....here is the woman I am looking for.....

[Wetzelbill]

I often prefer shorter women, around 5'1 give or take a few inches. But really, it's not like height is a litmus test. I'm short, so if a woman is fine with that I'm good with whatever.

I want someone who is intelligent, articulate and curious about the world. In particular I love creative women, but if you aren't creative yourself but have a passion for the arts, that is just as good. Anybody who loves literature, film and music I would just die for. I hope she would appreciate poetry, Neruda, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, James Welch, Dylan Thomas, Tennyson etc.

Anything artistic is good.

I want her to be strong, feminist and feminine, smarter than I am. I'm looking for someone who has compassion for others, is interested in current events - I'm obsessed but not everybody can go this far - and is just enough different so that she can bring into the relationship her likes and dislikes. And, I can learn from them and share that with her too.

I want someone who doesn't mind that I watch sports, who doesn't mind that I like my space sometimes. I want her to laugh at all the funny things I say and to make me laugh too.

Someone whose idea of a perfect evening is to each pick up a book and read together in silence for hours in the same room. Never saying a word but just enjoying each other's company and love.

I don't want a woman who will be one step behind me all the time. I want her to be at my side. To be the Sheila to my Paul. (you know, the Wellstones, always loving, always holding hands, yeah, I want that)

I want to be her Florentino Ariza and her to be my Fermina Daza. (if you get that then you just might be what I'm looking for)

I'd love it if she was more successful and more ambitious than me. I have no ego like that.

I want someone who will let me cook for her, give messages and will allow me to be my sometimes sickeningly saccharine hopeless romantic self. Breakfast in bed, reading my poetry, the whole nine yards......

Most of all I'm looking for someone who will allow me to love her fiercely, with all my heart and until the end of time.

So if this is asking for too much then I guess I'm doomed to be a bachelor forever. :)

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. You sound just about perfect...Alas...

For I am married, and am probably old enough to be your mom....

But everything you've said here is wonderful, and I hope for your sake that some lovely young woman comes along and appreciates all the good things that you have to offer...

For you have many gifts, my dear Wetzelbill...

I hope you find her! :yourock: :hug: :loveya:

[Wetzelbill]

4. oh well......

Your wisdom and your warmth make knowing you such a pleasure, you know that?

But, yes, thank you very much. You are a wonderful woman and it's been nice getting to know you a little on these late nights.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

19. Thank you so much for your very thoughtful words!

I am touched by your sentiments, my dear Wetzelbill...It has also been a pleasure getting to know you a little here on these late nights in the Lounge...

You are a lovely guy, and there's a lucky lady out there just right for you...

[Wetzelbill]

23. you're welcome

:)

[ahem]

2. Well, I've got Neruda and Thomas right in my sig pic, as well as

a few musicians I love. I'm definitely a feminist. I'm a visual artist. I'm polylingual. Reading and hiking are my two favorite things. I'm a bit tall, but love shorter men -- problem being I already married one ;)

You sound like a wonderful guy, and I'm sure you'll find the perfect mate soon.

:hi:

[Wetzelbill]

3. rats.... foiled again...

:)

Hey thanks for the words. :)

[ahem]

6. BTW, I've never read any James Welch, but I'd like to.

Any advice for a piece to start with?

[Wetzelbill]

8. either Winter In The Blood or Fools Crow

Fools Crow is his best novel. One of the best I've ever read, top 2 or 3.

However, Winter In The Blood is his first one, and it's really a great novel. Easy to read, you could finish it in one or two sittings, plus it's a good way to introduce yourself to his work.

Either way you can't go wrong.

If you like poetry, he has one book out, Riding The Earthboy 40, which is a wonderful little book of poems. The Earthboy 40 is actually only a few miles from where I grew up. Jim Welch was a childhood friend of my fathers. His dad, Jim Sr. is still a good friend of our family. Here are two of his poems if you'd like to check them out.



In My First Hard Springtime

Those red men you offended were my brothers.
Town drinkers, Buckles Pipe, Star Boy,
Billy Fox, were blood to bison. Albert Heavy Runner
was never civic. You are white and common.

Record trout in Willow Creek chose me
to deify. My horse, Centaur, part cayuse,
was fast and mad and black. Dandy in flat hat
and buckskin, I rode the town and called it mine.

A slow hot wind tumbled dust against my door.
Fed and fair, you mocked my philosophic nose,
my badger hair. I rolled your deference
in the hay and named it love and lasting.

Starved to visions, famous cronies top Mount Chief
for names to give respect to Blackfeet streets.
I could deny them in my first hard springtime,
but choose amazed to ride you down with hunger.



Christmas Comes to Moccasin Flat

Christmas comes like this: Wise men
unhurried, candles bought on credit (poor price
for calves), warriors face down in wine sleep.
Winds cheat to pull heat from smoke.

Friends sit in chinked cabins, stare out
plastic windows and wait for commodities.
Charlie Blackbird, twenty miles from church
and bar, stabs his fire with flint.

When drunks drain radiators for love
or need, chiefs eat snow and talk of change,
an urge to laugh pounding their ribs.
Elk play games in high country.

Medicine Woman, clay pipe and twist tobacco,
calls each blizzard by name and predicts
five o'clock by spitting at her television.
Children lean into her breath to beg a story:

Something about honor and passion,
warriors back with meat and song,
a peculiar evening star, quick vision of birth.
Blackbird feeds his fire. Outside, a quick 30 below.

[ahem]

13. Thank you. I'll try to fit both of those novels in this summer.

My reading list is full, but I'm always looking for new additions. I'll definitely check out more of his poetry. I enjoyed Christmas Comes to Moccasin Flat best of the two.

I'll let you know what I think.

[Wetzelbill]

27. they are both well worth it

You're welcome.

[Floogeldy]

5. I read your post all of the way through.

:puke:

[Wetzelbill]

7. I know, I know

go to hell. :)

[Floogeldy]

9. Bill, I haven't given up on you yet.

I am confident that, someday, you will learn the truly essential qualities of a good woman.

;)

[shockra]

11. Sounds like he's got it just right to me.

:P

[Floogeldy]

12. Then you should PM him . . .

. . . and give him your phone number!

;)

[Wetzelbill]

14. See now you're talking

:)

[shockra]

21. Alas, I am already madly crushing on somebody else.

You know how it is. You can't spend any length of time here and not be.

I loved your description though. I'm almost 5'3, a feminist, have a degree in literature, play some instruments (piano, violin, guitar and bass). But I'm not that into poetry, even though I've written and recorded songs (on my 8 track). You'd think I would be. Must be the short attention span.

I spend most of my time reading (or writing) and I used to watch a lot of sports, so I get that. Mostly basketball. I've watched a thousand movies and written a few screenplays.

I can't live without funny. Gutbusting funny.

You're barking right up my alley.

I don't get the Florentino Ariza/Fermina Daza reference however...so it doesn't sound meant to be.

That's pretty amazing that you'd say you'd like a smarter woman. That would have to be pretty damn smart. And I think I am, because I've got a big ego like that. }(

[Wetzelbill]

22. well, I am a Mensa member and a genius

oh wait, that was a compulsive liar my bad. :)

You should read "Love In The Time Of Cholera" by Gabriel Garcia Marquez.


I love smart women. I enjoy being awestruck.

More of a literature guy than poetry I should say. It doesn't seem that way from my post.

I've written a few short screeplays. Was the 1st Assistant Director for one of them. Directed and produced a music video. Done a few other things like that.

I also was the coauthor of a novel that came out a few years ago. Short story anthology in which all proceeds went to cancer research.

Oh, short people tend to have big egos. Writers tend to have big egos. So since I know I have a big ego -about certain things - I'll take your word that you do. :)

Isn't it impossible to be around here for any amount of time and not be extremely drawn to someone or someones? :)

[shockra]

29. Ah, I see...

I've read One Hundred Years of Solitude. Maybe I should have read that one instead. :)

You're right. Writers and short people have big egos. In fact, you remind me a lot of a short Pulitzer prize nominated author who gave me a really hard time on another message board. So I'm trying to get past that, but hey...you really could BE a genius. :D

I do tend to be drawn to other people who are Indian, or part Indian. Before I even officially know that they are. There's just something spiritual there that I notice and relate to.

That's a healthy list of accomplishments. Me like.

Yes, but I can hardly believe I'm crushing. It had been a long time. I was getting hard to impress and cynical about relationships. I'm pretty glad I found this place with some men on it closer to my ideal than I ever thought possible. I might have given up on ya'll entirely, otherwise. ;)

[Wetzelbill]

16. I just might

maybe.

Sometime.

Right now I'm just pretty shallow. :P

Hey if you think it made you sick reading that thing, imagine having to write it. :)

[Floogeldy]

18. Ha ha!

;)

[Whoa_Nelly]

10. It's good to be honest

anything less, and anyone who puts you down for it, is a lost cause.

[Wetzelbill]

15. good advice

Thank you. :)

[enigmatic]

17. If Mrs. E had a sister...

you'd be in:)

[Wetzelbill]

26. yeah then they could both

bail us out of jail and make us sleep on our respective couches. :)

[Dastard Stepchild]

20. yoinks.... if you were in Illinois..

Your dance card would be filled. I can't even begin to count the number of galpals I have that would be tickled to read such a lovely laundry list of partner qualities. :)

[Wetzelbill]

24. funny...I'm moving there soon...

Ok, no I'm not. But, I made you look. :)

You know, whenever I ask girls that I'm friends with if they have any friends they either say one of the things. Either they don't have many girls that they are friends with or they get extremely protective of me. "Oh, you're too good for her." lol I think my buddies think I'm too sweet or something, haha.

Damn those unfilled dance cards. :)

[ForrestGump]

25. Kinda interesting, to me, that I read your manifesto

and realized that I don't know if I could come up with something similar. Maybe it's just that I'm more at the point of knowing what I don't want and am far away from beginning to figure out what I do want in a romantic partner. Maybe it's partly that I'm pretty much open to so much variation in each quality -- barring attributes that I don't particularly want to be dealing with again -- that my list would be so unfocused as to be useless. Maybe it's mostly that I haven't been thinking about any of this because I'm seriously starting to wonder if I'm even meant to be with a woman again, ever...whetehr by chance or by choice. I'm sure off to a good start with the latter, and probably just as well: I refer, of course, to the perpetual Cooties Problem.

Anyway, may whatever's best for you be how it turns out. In the meantime, let's go beat drums in the forest...

[Wetzelbill]

31. self-delete

dupe

[Wetzelbill]

32. oh beating drums!!!

That's my specialty.

Well, if you notice I never put down anything physical, I just mentioned height and that isn't a litmus test. Plus, people interested in creative stuff and who are smart etc, can have totally different layers to them. So there is lots of room for a wide swath. I have a pretty solid idea of what I'd like to have, but I often go for something totally different than that too. I'm just lucky I can focus on a few things and not just be in total chaos about my interests.

I know what I don't want, but sometimes I'm dumb enought to fall for it anyway. It is a big flaw for me.

But, I will say, I am eccentric. I like my space. And, I understand the perpetual cootie problem.

[tjdee]

36. Me too--

I have 10-12 things that a guy cannot be, but not a list of what he could be.

For my part, though, I think that means I'll take almost anything!

Um, which could probably present its own problems, LOL.

[bicentennial_baby]

28. Oh, so you're looking for me, eh?

Well, I knew that already... :P

:loveya:

[Wetzelbill]

30. you do make a guy's heart sing

Yeah. I think you would have me pretty much wrapped up, if we were to ever meet. It'd be like shooting fish in a barrel for you, lol.

If only I could be so lucky. :)

[In_The_Wind]

33. I don't think that you are asking too much.

How could the woman of your dreams resist this ~>"Most of all I'm looking for someone who will allow me to love her fiercely, with all my heart and until the end of time."

[Wetzelbill]

34. Joani, you always have great faith

in my ability to reach nearly any goal.

I appreciate the support.

Yup, that line is a good one huh? I mean it too. :)

[NMMNG]

35. This list is far more realistic than the ones I saw on the other thread

You'd find many more qualifying women than people who are expecting near perfection, or qualities that probably don't exist in more than .0004% of the female population. You also appear somewhat flexible, which is a plus. I doubt you will remain a bachelor forever.

[Old_Fart]

37. "My take on it is"

I want someone who doesn't mind that I watch sports, who doesn't mind that I like my space sometimes. I want her to laugh at all the funny things I say and to make me laugh too.

Someone whose idea of a perfect evening is to each pick up a book and read together in silence for hours in the same room. Never saying a word but just enjoying each other's company and love.


"Are you looking for someone who will sit down and shut up"

[Wetzelbill]

38. no way!

exactly the opposite.

However, I'd like someone who can appreciate quiet moments.

[JimmyJazz]

42. Why are you consistently antagonistic toward people in the lounge.

I mean seriously, why bother? All you ever seem to do is criticize and berate people. I'm a woman and I didn't read it that way at all.

Your post is mean-spirited. Oh gee - why am I not surprised?

[Old_Fart]

43. "I spent 20 years with someone that told me to shut up while they read"

After 20 years I walked out and didn't look back. Bitter about the situation but not mean spirited.

Your still upset over the "orange flowers". I hate the color orange. I told you that I loved the blue sky. I also told you that your kids are adorable.

I hate orange!

[JimmyJazz]

45. I'm upset about nothing. I just am making a general observation

regarding your posts.

I'm also sorry you were hurt. People who take other people for granted don't rate very highly in my book and it sounds as if you were taken for granted. However, having someone tell you to "shut up" because they want to read isn't the same thing as wanting to be in the same room with someone while you BOTH read.

I hope you don't hold that bitterness in your heart. It will keep you from being truly happy. Trust me. I've learned that the only person hurt in a grudge match is the person carrying the grudge.

Best wishes to you.

[Old_Fart]

49. "Thanks for the observation"

If you wouldn't have pointed it out I wouldn't have noticed and now I notice. I was with someone that wouldn't allow me to utter one word in the car, at the table or while it was reading time. I hold a grudge against myself for staying 20 years.

Thanks.

[JimmyJazz]

50. That is truly sad.

It only proves that one can be in a "relationship" and still be incredibly lonely. For that, I am sorry.

I hope your wounds heal and that you are able to move on one day.

[auntAgonist]

44. what makes you read that into his post?

boy , and i'm the antagonist here.

[JimmyJazz]

39. I think you forgot to mention doing the NYTimes crossword together

on Sunday mornings....and finishing it :D

[SOteric]

40. Love in The Time of Cholera...

Heady stuff.

JJ's right, you left out the crosswords. On Sundays. In ink.

[dorktv]

41. I had to brush my teeth after this list.

:D

Just kidding.

[datasuspect]

46. cloying

but still sweet. reminds me of how i used to be before i became a monster.

different strokes for different folks.

[tigereye]

47. ah I'm a sucker for guys who love poetry, music and art

but I already met that guy and married him. I know there are lots of cool women out there who would meet your criteria!

Best of luck to you! And no, you are not asking too much. Sometimes it just takes a little while to figure out that "she," whomever she may be, is the right person.

:thumbsup:

[Kire]

48. you're dreamy

:puke:

[The Straight Story]

51. This woman fits the bill:

But alas, she is already taken :)

[Porcupine]

52. You're doomed to celibacy. Can I copy your list?

Seriously guy you're asking for Beluga in a world of bait. I honestly wish you luck.

Edit: eliminate the end of time statement. I am currently "waiting for the end of time" as Meatloaf would say. dumbass that I was I put it in my marraige vows and then believed them.

[shockra]

53. Just Curious.

What is the funniest movie ever made?

Besides Dumb & Dumber. :D