A joke to start your day

[The Witch]

This was just forwarded to me from a co-worker. Sorry if it's been posted before.

A woman walks into a curio shop in San Francisco. Looking around at the exotica, she notices a very lifelike, life-sized bronze statue of a rat. It has no price tag, but is so striking she decides she must have it. She takes it to the owner: "How much for the bronze rat?"

"Twelve dollars for the rat, a hundred dollars for the story," says the owner. The woman gives the shop-owner twelve dollars. " I'll just take the rat, you can keep the story."

As she walks down the street carrying his bronze rat, she notices that a few real rats have crawled out of alleys and sewers, and begun following her down the street. This is a bit disconcerting, so she begins walking a little faster. Within a couple blocks, the group of rats behind her grows to over a hundred, and they begin squealing.

She starts to trot toward the Bay. She takes a nervous look around and sees that the rats now number in the thousands--maybe millions--and they are all squealing and coming toward her faster and faster. Terrified, she runs to the edge of the Bay, and throws the bronze rat as far out into the Bay as she can. Amazingly, the millions of rats all jump into the Bay after it, and are all drowned.

The woman walks back to the curio shop. "Ah ha," says the owner, "I'll bet you have come back for the story?"

"No," said the woman, "I came back to see if you have a bronze Republican."

[KyndCulture]

1. tee hee I love that one.. here's another...

Bush was taking a jog in a park in DC, he came upon a young tow-headed blue eyed boy with a box of newborn kittens. Bush asked the boy to see the kittens, and the boy said here you go Mr. President. Do you know what kind of kittens they are? said the boy. Bush said, calico? the boy said. No they are republican kittens. Bush patted the young boy and went on with his jog.

A few days later Bush and Cheney were walking in the same park and Bush sees the boy again. He drags Dick over to see the kittens. Bush says, ask the kid what kind they are. So Dick asks and the boy says, they are DEMOCRATS.

What says Bush? You said they were republicans. The boy smiles and says, yeah but their eyes are open now.


:rofl:

[Lubernaut]

3. I hope Cheney

didn't hurt the kittens. I hear he's kinda mean.

[KyndCulture]

4. well

he could eat one of em and the freepers would say "that's ok, he was just a wittle hungry"... zombies that they are.

[BlueEyedSon]

2. Woo hooo! kick

[knitter4democracy]

5. Kick!

This is sooo funny!!!

[mouyard]

6. A Generous Republican... ;-)

One afternoon, a well-to-do Republican was riding in his shiny limousine when he saw two men along the roadside eating grass.

Disturbed, he ordered his driver to stop and he got out to investigate the situation.

He asked one man, "Why are you eating grass?"

"We don't have any money for food," the poor man replied. "We HAVE TO EAT GRASS!"

The Republican then said, "Well, then, you can come with me to my house and I'll feed you!"

"But sir, I have a wife and two children with me. They are over there, under that tree."

"Bring them along," the Republican replied.

Turning to the other poor man he said, "You come with us, too."

The second man said, "But sir, I also have a wife and six children with me!"

"Bring them all!" the Republican answered. They all jammed into the huge limo.

Once underway, one of the poor fellows turned to the Republican and said, "Sir, you are too kind. Thank you for taking all of us with you."

Genuinely touched, the Republican replied, "Glad to do it. You'll really love my place; the grass is almost a foot high!"

[knitter4democracy]

7. Ha!

Yeah, that's about right . . .

[Clintmax]

8. ROFL!

:rofl: