gift giving from the poor

[sniffa]

if you received a gift from someone you knew was poor, wouLd you berate them for the quaLity of the gift - ie: you didn't spend enough on my gift?

or wouLd you thank them for the thought, and the effort of getting a gift despite their financiaL situation?

x( x( x(

[progmom]

1. people can be so rotten

x(

[sniffa]

3. that's just so fucked up

x(

[redqueen]

2. Good God, sniffa!

You have to ask?!

:(

[sniffa]

4. i know i don't have to ask

i'm just getting the vent out. x(

[redqueen]

7. I know... I gathered...

but... it makes me so sad/ mad to see that you had to vent about this...

I hope this didn't happen on DU!

[MissB]

5. I'd just make them a card next time.

x(

[Maddy McCall]

6. The latter, or course, and it would mean more to me than an expensive...

gift from a wealthy friend.

What's the story behind your question?

[sniffa]

8. eh

someone beLittLing a gift from a poor person. x(

[redqueen]

9. GRRRRRRRRR

I wanna kick their ass so hard!

[Trigger Hippie]

10. I'd never berate anyone

who is thoughtful enough to give a gift, any gift. Even if you don't like it...

Jeez, people can be so mean. :(

Edit: clarification

[Lars39]

11. I'd have to take them aside and give 'em what-for.

The giver needs an apology,too.

[WeRQ4U]

12. Here's something along those lines.

My wife and I just had a child, and my wife is on leave to take care of him. Hence, we don't have a lot of spending money. My sister in law was getting married and after they asked us numerous times we BOTH decided to attend. (My wife was actually IN the wedding. I wasnt' going to go at all). THe wedding was on the west coast. The tickets were about 700 bucks.

My wife had knitted her a beautiful and fairly expensive shawl for a present, but thought that it would be nice to purchase something small for her off their registry, but she didnt' want to pay the shipping. She called up her sister to ask if there were stores avaiable in the area so we could buy it while we were there, instead of shipping it to them. I thought that this was a good question, but her sister went off.

She told my wife that she has enough on her plate right now with the wedding and that we were being "cheap" to not just buy her a gift and have it shipped. I found numerous things wrong with this:

1. When someone is giving you a gift, you don't complain abuot the manner through which you get that gift.

2. When someone is spending about a grand coming to see you get married, and also spends about a month making you a present, don't bitch about not getting a fucking bowl from Pier One.

NOT TO MENTION the fact that when she came to OUR wedding, she didn't come with her fiance becasue it was too expensive, even though we asked. When she came to OUR wedding she had to spend less for her plane ticket than we did. When she came to OUR wedding, my wife said that she didn't have to buy any presents becasue the plane ticket and dress were enough of a present, and she gladly complied. AND SHE CALLS US CHEAP. What a goon.

SOrry for the rant. But people like that are so fucking irritating.

[driver8]

16. I don't know what happens to some people when it comes to

weddings...it is almost like they quit sending oxygen to their brains!

You guys took time off your work, flew to your sister-in-law's wedding, and she bitches about a fucking gift from her registry?

Not to mention that you have a new baby!!!

I think I would have become very ill all of a sudden and not been able to fly.

[NMMNG]

13. It's rude to tell someone they didn't spend enough on your gift

whether or not they are poor. But it is particularly snotty to do so when you know they are of limited means. The idea of gift giving is not to gain people's favor through ostentatious displays of wealth, it is to show them you care by selecting something you put some thought into. Whether that item is a $5 gift card from Starbucks for the latte-lover or a new Silver Persian kitten for the animal buff it doesn't matter. If it is well thought out, that is what counts.

[driver8]

14. I would always thank them!!

Who gives a shit how much it costs? If someone gives me a gift, they deserve to be thanked.

WTF is wrong with people?

[Draill]

15. Goodness

Belittling a gift of any kind is pretty damned rude.

[xmas74]

17. Anyone who wouldn't thank someone for any kind of gift is an

asshole.