Gratuitous Wedding Planning Rant............

[Darth_Kitten]

Don't wear white if you're not a virgin. Period.

Sometimes I cut home through the park where weddings are taking place. Lots of yuong brides wearing white, that's always bugged me. Like they are pure little virgins? (maybe I should have named this the gratuitous cynical nasty wedding planning rant) ;)

Sorry, I'm just being shallow and nasty today. :(

[philosophie_en_rose]

1. Why should women have to wear their virginity?

If I want to wear white, I'll wear white.

If a man's not a virgin, are his choices limited?

[Darth_Kitten]

2. That's what it's a symbol of.....

ick!!!

:evilgrin:

[YellowRubberDuckie]

3. See, this isn't true anymore...

If you're pregnant, I agree...but other than that, if someone wants to wear white, I'm all for it. I don't care for ivory, and I'm wearing white at my wedding in October. Oh and i'm really not a virgin.
Duckie

[SOteric]

4. I disagree. Sure, sure, the virginal state of a bride was a big deal

in the 19th century, but here in the 21st, it's no longer considered any of the public's business.

Over the course of the last 200 years or so, white gowns have come to signify the occasion of a wedding in western culture regardless of whether the bride is holding on to her virginity.

I don't care if a bride who's been around the block a few times wants to put on a pretty white dress, and I don't care if a bride who's still virginal wants to wear scarlet.

[Darth_Kitten]

8. I've always wanted to wear black myself.

:evilgrin:

Okay, okay, any bride can wear white if she wishes. But, they all seem to wish that.

The first bride I see wearing scarlet will earn my life long respect. :)

[yvr girl]

39. My cousin wore a really faint pink dress

Only because she didn't like white. She was already living with the groom so I highly doubt she was a virgin. :D

[ernstbass]

41. I SHOULD have worn black

[tjwmason]

50. A good friend of mine wore red

Not quite scarlet - but still a very strong red and very close to scarlet, neither too deep (verging on burgundy) nor to insipid (verging on pink).

She looked quite stunning, and whilst folk were shocked at first, it was utterly inkeeping with her character.

[DS1]

9. besides, who'd want to marry a virgin?

:shrug:

[SOteric]

10. Erm...

another virgin?

[blondeatlast]

14. It's like buying a car on E-bay;

who knows how much it's really been driven?

[xmas74]

5. Actually, my attitude is that of

don't wear white if you look bad in white.
Some people cannot wear white(I can't)-it washes them out. I think that people should be willing to buck a silly tradition and wear what looks best on them.

[SarahB]

6. I think it's appropriate.

If they have not been married before and/or have children, particularly if they are relatively young, it's fine. How many people are virgins when they marry and why should it be about the woman's virginity? What should or shouldn't men wear if they're not virgins? :shrug:

[Left Is Write]

12. My wedding was my one and only wedding, my only marriage.

I had a ten-year-old daughter at the time. I didn't wear white exactly - it was more off-white. If I'd found a dress I liked in white, though, I'd have worn it, my parental status notwithstanding.

[SarahB]

31. I'm sorry.

I think ultimately people should wear what they want and feel is right for themselves. I might not wear white at this point in my life (truth be told, I don't like white anyway), but I'm me, we are all individuals (which is a good thing), and I'm not the judgmental sort at all. I don't want to come across as that way, so I apologize if I did. :)

[Left Is Write]

45. I know you're not judgmental...

:hug:

If something were to happen to my husband/marriage, and I were to marry a second time, I would wear something other than white as a matter of personal preference. But even though I had a child ten years before I got married, I still wanted to have the kind of dress that said "wedding dress" to me.

I have to admit that I still did go non-traditional: the dress was above the knee.

[flordehinojos]

7. a friend who has been living with her boyfriend for a few years now, will

wear white on their wedding day sometime in the fall or early winter.

[Left Is Write]

11. I agree.

That was nasty.

[lildreamer316]

13. Let me show you what my dress is:

And I'm going to have that in either a sage green or off-white linen color.

[petronius]

15. Nice - is that a gun belt?

:)

(Just kidding you about your other thread - which I thought was just fine except for a couple of overly-clenched sphincters...)

[lildreamer316]

16. Sure is! LOL

Thanks. I tend to be suprised when ppl don't understand where I am coming from and that is a bit naieve. I'll get over it.

[JohnnyBoots]

18. You getting hand fasted for the ceremony or doing the traditional ring

thing?

[lildreamer316]

20. Handfasting.

Because we are going to go to the judge and do the $50 thing in a month. The whole dress and pony show will be next year.

[JohnnyBoots]

23. Congratulations, any problems with family members about that?

[lildreamer316]

25. Don't know; don't care.

Not to say I don't love my family; but (both parents dead=me; one dead=him) it dosen't really matter. They (extended fam.) are usually pretty cool anyway and are not easily upset. They accepted that I was an exotic entertainer, so this is probably not that big a deal in the scheme of things........

[JohnnyBoots]

27. Good perspective, my future wife is the pagan, i am

more like a pot of chili when it comes to religion.anyway her floks are still hard core Catholic....mine are just glad i met a good woman who loves me....should be intersting the closer we get to the actual date...btw..her family is awesome...Catholisicm and all.

[lildreamer316]

28. Didn't we have this convo in a thread about

being kinda "psychic"
Or am I blonder today than usual?
Best of luck on that; the Catholics are fun. PM me if your lady wife needs extra resources; I have a couple of the pagan handfasting books and a BUNCH of websites with good info bookmarked.

[JohnnyBoots]

29. Good to know... I am pretty sure I was three sheets to the wind when

we last talked...anyhooo Congrats again!

[tigereye]

17. damn!

that's what I should have worn! ;)Beautiful celtic banding on that dress.

[lildreamer316]

21. I just hope I can find

someone to make it like that!

[philosophie_en_rose]

19. It's a lovely dress.

The collar looks like it'd overwhelm a short person like me, but it's a lovely dress. I'm sure you'll look great. (and best wishes for your wedding!)

[lildreamer316]

22. Just a painting now;

hoping to find someone very proficient at turning it into reality. I think I may shrink the collar a bit too even though I'm tall. We'll see.

[hickman1937]

30. I love this dress. I don't know about the vambraces though.

Unless you're expecting an attack, a medival loop thing might be more comfortable.

[Tikki]

24. My mother (who was born in the 19-teens) used to recite...

...these ditties to me when I was a little girl...

Married in White, you have chosen right
Married in Grey, you will go far away,
Married in Black, you will wish yourself back,
Married in Red, you will wish yourself dead,
Married in Green, ashamed to be seen,
Married in Blue, you will always be true,
Married in Pearl, you will live in a whirl,
Married in Yellow, ashamed of your fellow,
Married in Brown, you will live in the town,
Married in Pink, you spirit will sink


I was married in yellow...I have been 40 years proud on my guy..
My mother was married in blue...three times...

Tikki

[lildreamer316]

26. That is cool!

I love litte old folk ditties like that. Not so true always; but neat.

[Redstone]

32. It's THEIR wedding. Why do you care what color they wear?

Redstone

[Darth_Kitten]

36. Easy........

this is the Lounge..... just having some fun....sheesh. :eyes:

[Redstone]

38. OK, sorry. Sometimes I'm a little slow on the uptake.

Redstone

[Darth_Kitten]

43. nah.......

I just like to stir up trouble. :hide: ;) :evilgrin:

:hi:

[NMMNG]

33. I don't like that notion that a woman should have to "advertise"

her virginity (or lack thereof) by the color of her wedding dress. The man doesn't, and people are usually far less concerned about his virginity and that is downright sexist. Same goes for the idea that the woman must wear a wedding band but it is optional for the man.

[6000eliot]

34. If I could be a bride

I'd wear something blue, complete with DNA. Screw virginity!

[Nikia]

35. I saw white as a rite of passage color

In rite of passage ceremonies, one often wears special clothes. The clothes signify a special status. Although virginity, meaning no sexual relations, is a status signified by white, there can be another status signified by white too. To me, the status change is unmarried to married not necessarily virgin to non virgin. For this reason, it is perfectly proper that all never married women wear white at their weddings. The difference between unmarried and married is a bigger deal in this culture than virginity anyway.

[Magrittes Pipe]

37. Thank God I'm still a virgin! I can wear a beautiful white dress!

:bounce:

[Left Is Write]

44. And I'm sure you'll look darling in it too.

:crazy:

[Coventina]

40. The white dress is a fairly recent tradition anyway.

So who cares?

:shrug:

I bought a nice navy blue dress to get married in. One I can wear for any dress up occaision. Whenever I put it on it brings back happy memories of our special day.

I personally think that's better than having it entombed in some box to be preserved for.....what?

[friesianrider]

42. Ehhh...who cares.

As long as they're happy. I'd be more concerned with people getting into a marriage than what color dress they wear to the wedding.

[Darth_Kitten]

46. they are still annoying.....

people spend more time planning a wedding than planning major life decisions.

I don't like happy people, see. ;)

[friesianrider]

48. I agree with that.

People plan for the wedding and not the marriage. As far as I know, they don't take returns on a used $9,000 dress!

[hfojvt]

47. I told some friends that I hated weddings

and they said that makes me a cynic (or was it misanthrope, I forget), but for me a wedding is like Valentine's day, just another reminder of how unloved (if not unloveable) I am.

Now I get to clean up after all the receptions and set up for the next reception/party. What is that saying "always a janitor, never a groom" or something like that.

[NNadir]

49. You are indeed being shallow and nasty.

The focus on virginity is rather medieval.

[tjwmason]

51. Not mediaeval

Victorian.

The whole obsession with pure-white is only a couple of hundred years old.

Apart from those who had to be careful about dynastic succession - mediaevals were nothing like the prudes which came later.

I know it's more early-modern than mediaeval but Anne Hathaway was up the duff with William Shakespeare's first sprog when they married.