Football Sucks!!!!

[motely36]

I just don't get it. Run a play, congratulate each other, huddle, maybe call a timeout. ad nauseum....

and cheerleaders...what is the point????

Baseball is a much better sport.

:hi:

[billyskank]

1. Cricket is the sport of the Gods

This year. :)

[motely36]

4. Can you explain the rules?

I have no idea how to play.

[billyskank]

15. As far as I know

The rectangle in the middle of the field is called the green, and it has a wicket at either end. One batsman stands in front of each wicket, and one of them is bowled to by a bowler at the opposite wicket. The bowler is trying to hit the wicket with the ball, in which case the batsman is out. The batsman is also out if he hits the ball and a fielder catches it before it bounces, or if he misses the ball and it strikes his leg when it would otherwise have hit the wicket (this is called lbw - leg before wicket - this last one can cause some controversial umpiring decisions), or if he is run out (I will come to this later).

The bowler bowls six balls at the batsman; six balls is called an over. At the end of the over, the ball is passed to another bowler who is waiting at the other wicket. That bowler will then bowl an over himself, and then we repeat.

When the batsman strikes the ball, if he thinks he has sufficient time before the fielders retrieve it, he can run to the other wicket. When he does so, the other batsman must also run so that they swap ends. If the second batsman fails to do that then he is run out. The batsmen attempt to make as many runs as they can before the ball is retrieved. If the ball is retrieved and hits either wicket before the batsman makes it to the line in the ground in front of the wicket (called the crease) then this is the other way he can be run out.

If the batsman strikes the ball and it makes it over the boundary round the perimeter of the field then he gets four runs without having to go anywhere. Similarly, if he hits it over the boundary without bouncing then he gets six runs automatically.

There are eleven players in each side, so the side fielding/bowling must get ten batsmen out (getting a batsman out is referred to as a wicket) in order to terminate their innings. The side batting simply attempts to score as many runs as possible before they are got all out. Once they are all out, the side that was fielding has a chance at batting to beat their total.

In 5-day test cricket, each side gets two innings apiece. They flip a coin at first to decide who bats first. There are a set number of overs each day; once the overs are all exhausted the game is over. If one side is still not out by the end of play on the 5th day then the match is drawn. No extensions. If play has to be abandoned on one or more days of the match, causing them to run out of time, tough shit. It's a draw.

Sorry about the complexity, but cricket is a very complex and subtle game. There is actually far more to tell about it, would you believe, but I do not understand all there is to know. Particularly I do not know all of the terminology.

[billyskank]

24. Yes I thought that would be a conversation stopper

:P

[motely36]

26. Sorry, got wrapped up in other things.

Cricket has always sounded complex. Maybe it would be easier to just watch it.

[billyskank]

31. Given that a test match lasts five days

it's pretty hard to watch, unless you actually care about who wins!

Basically just take baseball, make it 50 times more complicated, and you might have something that somewhat resembles cricket. ;)

[KFC]

28. The Ashes

I guess the pommy bastards finally came out on top.

[billyskank]

30. You love me!

I know "pommie baaaastards" is a term of affection. ;)

[KFC]

34. All pommie bastards are ok in my book

And I am not even a Convict

[defiant1]

2. Uhhh....

Baseball - Hit the ball, catch the ball, throw the ball.

Actually there's more to baseball than that, just like there's more to football then run a play.

[motely36]

3. I guess,

I just find baseball must more fun. Probably the way I was brought up. We went to lots of baseball games, but not football games.

[defiant1]

8. My family liked most sports....

baseball, basketball, football so I got a healthy dose as I grew up.

[WeRQ4U]

5. Nothing in sports gets me more excited than an NFL football game

Football is a fast, loud, violent game with refined athletic ability involved. Some of the best athletes on this planet play football. Where else can you see a 345 pound man come up from a squat, shrug off another 300 pound man, sprint faster than you or I could, and then dive to the ground to catch another guy half his size? It's like Wild Kingdom.

It's become quite entertaining too. Baseball doesn't have the right atmosphere for flare, noise and raging energy that football does. (And I'm a HUGE Twins baseball fan). And although baseball fans can get sick sometimes, there is NOTHING like a true fan of an NFL football team. THey are absolutely insane.

[motely36]

6. Blah, blah, blah...

:P

[dajoki]

13. i guess you've never been to...

Yankee Stadium. can get pretty crazy!!

[WeRQ4U]

19. Yankees, blah blah, such good fans, blah blah.

:P

You obviously haven't seen the "Dog Pound" in Cleveland. Now those fuckers are nuts.

[Telly Savalas]

23. NFL fans can't hold a candle to soccer ultras.

[WeRQ4U]

33. From what I hear, you're probably right.

I forgot about those criminals.

[Telly Savalas]

36. There's a huge distinction between an ultra and a hooligan.

What criminal activity is occuring in the picture?

[WeRQ4U]

39. In Segorny Weaver's voice in Ghostbusters "There is no picture, only X"

:P

Besides. I don't watch soccer. NOr do I know any of the jargon. I just know what I've heard about in clippings. Sorry.

[Telly Savalas]

40. It's all good.

I'm just trying to make the distinction between the nutjobs who like to sing songs and shoot off flares for 90 minutes and the sociopaths who use team loyalty as an excuse to beat the shit out of people. Maybe there would be less violence outside of soccer venues if there was more tailgating. Mmmmm. KC BBQ.

[WeRQ4U]

41. Tailgating is great man. I think you're on to something.

ALthough I have heard of fights outside philidelphia's stadium between home and visiting tailgaters. But there's always an exception.

[evlbstrd]

44. Some stadiums are safer than others for tailgating.

Arrowhead being one of them. I wouldn't go near the Oakland Coliseum.
Especially wearing Chiefs gear.

[WeRQ4U]

46. Nor Philli's Veteran's Stadium

With ANY visiting gear. You may die.

[evlbstrd]

48. They booed Santa Claus!

[WeRQ4U]

49. And threw snowballs at him.

LOL

[Dukkha]

50. those people make Trekkies look mentally stable

and socially refined. Especially the drunken face painters.

[snooper2]

7. Baseball sucks...

Bunch of overweight guys, with sticks, hitting a ball around that is covered in a coat of mud.

The only highlights are when somebody gets busted using roids. The game would be more interesting if they didn't use gloves to catch the ball, and added about 25 yards between the bases. And, what's up with the simple square they run around. Make it a octagon or something that catches the eye :)

[underpants]

9. It's a land acquisition game based on war

Baseball is okay.

[underpants]

12. George Carlin speaketh

by George Carlin
Baseball is different from any other sport, very different. For instance, in most sports you score points or goals; in baseball you score runs. In most sports the ball, or object, is put in play by the offensive team; in baseball the defensive team puts the ball in play, and only the defense is allowed to touch the ball. In fact, in baseball if an offensive player touches the ball intentionally, he's out; sometimes unintentionally, he's out.

Also: in football,basketball, soccer, volleyball, and all sports played with a ball, you score with the ball and in baseball the ball prevents you from scoring.

In most sports the team is run by a coach; in baseball the team is run by a manager. And only in baseball does the manager or coach wear the same clothing the players do. If you'd ever seen John Madden in his Oakland Raiders uniform,you'd know the reason for this custom.

Now, I've mentioned football. Baseball & football are the two most popular spectator sports in this country. And as such, it seems they ought to be able to tell us something about ourselves and our values.

I enjoy comparing baseball and football:

Baseball is a nineteenth-century pastoral game.
Football is a twentieth-century technological struggle.

Baseball is played on a diamond, in a park.The baseball park!
Football is played on a gridiron, in a stadium, sometimes called Soldier Field or War Memorial Stadium.

Baseball begins in the spring, the season of new life.
Football begins in the fall, when everything's dying.

In football you wear a helmet.
In baseball you wear a cap.

Football is concerned with downs - what down is it?
Baseball is concerned with ups - who's up?

In football you receive a penalty.
In baseball you make an error.

In football the specialist comes in to kick.
In baseball the specialist comes in to relieve somebody.

Football has hitting, clipping, spearing, piling on, personal fouls, late hitting and unnecessary roughness.
Baseball has the sacrifice.

Football is played in any kind of weather: rain, snow, sleet, hail, fog...
In baseball, if it rains, we don't go out to play.

Baseball has the seventh inning stretch.
Football has the two minute warning.

Baseball has no time limit: we don't know when it's gonna end - might have extra innings.
Football is rigidly timed, and it will end even if we've got to go to sudden death.

In baseball, during the game, in the stands, there's kind of a picnic feeling; emotions may run high or low, but there's not too much unpleasantness.
In football, during the game in the stands, you can be sure that at least twenty-seven times you're capable of taking the life of a fellow human being.

And finally, the objectives of the two games are completely different:

In football the object is for the quarterback, also known as the field general, to be on target with his aerial assault, riddling the defense by hitting his receivers with deadly accuracy in spite of the blitz, even if he has to use shotgun. With short bullet passes and long bombs, he marches his troops into enemy territory, balancing this aerial assault with a sustained ground attack that punches holes in the forward wall of the enemy's defensive line.

In baseball the object is to go home! And to be safe! - I hope I'll be safe at home!

[SouthoftheBorderPaul]

10. ALL SPORTS SUCK!!!!

There I said it...and I meant it.

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

11. You suck!

There, I said it... and I meant it! :hi:

[sundog]

27. witness

:thumbsup:

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

14. Just a few points I would like to mention

Baseball - make a pitch, look at it, make another pitch several minutes later, swing at it... repeat ad nauseum. Maybe a couple of dozen times a game, someone besides the pitcher, catcher, and batter get to do anything else. You can play an entire baseball game and not do more than bat three times (trust me, I've done it many times). And I'm not talking about the DH either. Coach goes to visit the pitcher for several minutes. Then he does it again. Then he does it again and changes pitcher. New pitcher warms up for 10 minutes. Gets one batter out. Coach changes pitcher again... see where I'm going on this?

Look, I do love baseball. But your criteria for bashing football don't really stand up against what you're claiming is better.

[Baclava]

16. Yum - cheerleaders

[Sean Reynolds]

35. Horny.

[dr.strangelove]

37. Can't stop staring

bounce bounce bounce, now I will never get anything done.

[southlandshari]

17. Locking

Inflammatory and inaccurate!


:P

(just kidding)

[southlandshari]

18. Kick

I didn't REALLY lock it!

:yoiks:

[chaska]

20. There are those who have made the case that football is very much....

a Republican game.

[kick-ass-bob]

21. And those people are crazybatshitinsane.

:P

[WilliamPitt]

25. There are those who make the case that Bush controls the weather

I got a busted watch. It's right twice a day.

[dr.strangelove]

38. Yeah, and those people are assholes

[Dukkha]

47. count me as one

Football represents everything bad about America
Glorified mindless warlike game
rapist thugs regarded as "heroes"
HUGE waste of money and news time
promotes misogyny through its ads
fan base largely rednecks & wife beaters
Rush Limbaugh & Dennis Miller were commentators
Teaches that winning is everything at all costs

[redqueen]

22. I like both.

But... I do like football more.

[SparklyJr]

29. not a fan, but mad respect

i don't watch football, or participate in it (i'm a theater kid, you know how we are).. but i have respect for the sport, for it is part of our history, and i enjoy watching the occational game around thanksgiving.

Football nuts (those who are obsessed with football- i.e. those who leave the dinnertable to watch football, teachers who give extra homework if their favorite team doesn't win, and those who can be seen in public dawned in paint coordinating with their team's colors), however, bug me. no offence to anyone, that is.
:)

[northzax]

32. I know! run around in circles

kicking a ball every which way but forward, and being ecstatic over a null-null tie. This is a sport? Any sport that has so little action that the fans have time to make up and sing entire songs between having something to cheer about, and this is the good teams, is all banged up.

[tavalon]

42. Cheerleaders....What is the point?

LOL. They are the only point, IMO.

[shockra]

43. I agree.

But the point of cheerleaders is to remind the heterosexual men that they're heterosexual while watching/playing such a homoerotic game.

[UrbScotty]

45. If you're talking about what Europeans call 'football,' I'm with you.

Of course, we call it 'soccer' because we* are more sophisticated.

*By 'we' I don't mean anyone in government.