Theoretical "What Would You Do": The Hotel Edition

[OldSoldier]

About seven years ago, I built a fine and independent hotel called the Liberal Inn. (This is a theoretical...) We are unionized because I unionized the place myself. My staff earns a living wage. Our beds don't sag in the middle. Our food is tasty. The rates aren't low, but that must not matter since the property is always sold out to other liberals and our profit margins are satisfactory.

A month ago I hired you because of your good work ethic, excellent customer service skills and liberal philosophy.

Last night, a Freeper walked in off the street to get a room. You politely inform him that the hotel is sold out. The Freeper wants to know when he can get a room. You politely inform him the hotel is sold out until 2006. Then he pulls out the hoary old saw: "If pResident Bush walked in and asked for a room, you'd have one for him, wouldn't you?"

Keep in mind that the Liberal Inn personnel manual strictly forbids swearing at the public, and that any violation of this policy can lead to termination. Now! Remembering that you are a liberal, you work for a liberal and everyone in the building from the maintenance staff to the guests are liberals, what would you say to this Freeper?

[meegbear]

1. Since I once worked in the hotel industry ...

(bellman), I would say "We would not have a room for him either. I can call some of the other hotels in the area and check what their availability is."

[ikojo]

2. I assume there is a policy of being able to deny service

to anyone deemed a threat to the well being of the other guests or something to that effect.

Should pResident * come in and seek a room I would deny him and his hangers on service on the pretext that they are not only a danger to the world but also to the other guests. I would point out the fact that this man (cough, cough) refuses to interact with those who do not share his opinion and has chosen to surround himself with those who think as he does.

He has also proven his threat by attacking a sovereign nation with no connection to the terrorist act of 9/11.

[OldSoldier]

3. At nice hotels, there is usually also a policy...

of denying service to someone who would disturb the other paying customers for a non-federally-protected reason.

You can't deny service to a black person but you can to someone who comes in yelling and screaming.

You can't deny service to a handicapped person but you can to someone so drunk they go over and piss in the corner before they come up and ask for a room. (With the corner-pissers, there's an added bonus: You get to ask security to escort them off the property!)

If you had a building full of liberals, the sight of George W. Bush walking down the hall with a bucket of ice and a bottle of Bacardi would be enough to spoil most people's dinner. Not a sound business practice if you make money serving food,

[JHB]

4. "If pResident Bush walked in and asked for a room...

...I would remind him that this establishment is a dedicated and inalienable 'First Amendment zone'. As you are no doubt aware, he scrupulously avoids those. I would be happy to assist you in finding a vacancy at another hotel. If you'd like to make yourself more comfortable, you can wait at the bar. I especially recommend the pretzels."

[Rabrrrrrr]

5. I like this one!!

First amendment zone - brilliant idea for an answer!

[undergroundpanther]

6. I'd say

Please sir the door is right behind you,I don't want your money. I run a ethical place here,a place where the assumption is everyone is treated equally and respectfully including the clean-up staff and I am sure being respectful to the human dignity of my waitstaff would be very upsetting for you.I know you aren't used to staying in a hotel without being catered to above other's needs, and not allowed to berate someone like a dog for not waiting on you as you abuse them as if you are entitled too because you paid a room fee.

There is no room at this inn for any petty lords because all bullies tend to ruin any pleasant social mileu they get involved in..So...
Bush would not be welcome here either because he has no decency, he's a petty lord who thinks he's entitled,he's an arrogant bully has no clue what equality is , he has no manners.

He can't even respect the queen's rose garden how could he understand how to respect the priceless things to me that I have in my little hotel? His money is not welcome because it is covered in corruption and blood.It's not worth it.

You are not part of the class of people we want to have in our fine establishment.So please do yourself a favor and find another hotel where people will put up with the likes of your kind.
Better hurry it's growing late,alot of other places have made ethical choices to exclude rude,destructive,verbally abusive people too.and another hotel might be hard to find.
You wouldn't understand our policy it's over your head.

(flick your wrist in his direction alluding to the door,and turn away dismissing him and ignoring him like other fancy hotels would dismiss a homeless person.)

(The repukes are classist bullies and they could not stand being treated like the poor for thier bad behavior.They just don't understand being an asshole by nature really can exclude you from participation and service.)


This should get him pissed off and then you can bounce him out.

[brainshrub]

10. Best one so far!

[Aristus]

7. "If pResident B*sh walked in here,

I'd throw his ass out, too!

*BASH*

Oops! I'm sorry, could you open the door for me? Thanks!"

*SLAM*

on edit: Yeah, I'm a liberal and damn proud of it, but sometimes, man, the gloves just gotta come OFF!

[thom1102]

8. Sir, if the commander-in-thief walked in here looking for a room...

He would be walking out the door right behind you.

[Rabrrrrrr]

9. You're saying you are as important as the president of the US?

That, sir, is treason, and as I am a gentleman, I give you opportunity to leave this hotel so I don't have to call the FBI. I'm sorry, but I cannot allow an anti-American into this hotel. Good day.