What features would you have in and around a totally un-PC house?

[XemaSab]

If you were going to design a house to be the least PC house evah, what features would it have, both inside and around the grounds?

I'll start: A wolf pelt hanging on the wall.

[Floogeldy]

1. I wouldn't do that.

I wouldn't have such a house. How would you prefer that wolf be killed? I'm so disappointed.

[XemaSab]

2. The point is to decorate the most tacky and appalling house

you can think of.

It's an exercise inspired by a design magazine I saw today.

No actual wolves were killed in the making of this thread.

[Floogeldy]

9. Oh . . .

I guess I'd build the structure of the house with the bloodied broken skulls of baby Seals, and bind it together with the by-product goo that is the final result of the rendering plants that dispose of all of the dogs and cats killed through euthanasia in America's many thousands of Pounds.

[XemaSab]

11. okay...

I was thinking a frame of old growth redwood, but that works too...

[Floogeldy]

16. Yes, but my house would be less PC than yours!

:P

[XemaSab]

18. that's arguable

maybe we could reach some sort of consensus, and have a wing of the house made out of old growth?

[Bucky]

37. The best way to kill this wolf would be...

a) pointless vivisection
b) alergy testing for cosmetics
c) lung cancer from smoking Marlboros
d) choking on a whooping crane

unPC enough for ya?

[XemaSab]

43. e) leg hold trap

oh yeah...

[FuzzySlippers]

3. Ooh...this sounds like fun!!!

I would have a rug in front of the bathroom sink made from a baby polar bear.

:popcorn: :popcorn:

[XemaSab]

5. That's the spirit!

:bounce:

[FuzzySlippers]

4. How about a nuclear reactor to heat the swimming pool?

:bounce: :bounce: :bounce:

[XemaSab]

6. There you go!

:bounce:

[TimeChaser]

7. I would...

have an elephant head mounted on the wall with the confederate flag draped over its tusks :rofl:

What's up, XemaSab? :hi:

[XemaSab]

8. *perfect*

I'm doing well, how are things there? :D

[TimeChaser]

12. Pretty good, glad it's friday

I found a juvenile cestode in my Wildlife parasitology course, so that's means we've found most of the major parasites already. And spring break's only a week off. :woohoo:

[XemaSab]

14. going for the grand slam of fish parasites, eh?

sounds like a party. :D

[TimeChaser]

30. Yep

I've gotta give a presentation to the Zoology department on the research next month, so the more creepy-crawlies, the better.

[XemaSab]

31. Word

I suck at little creepy crawlies. I like them megafauna, even if they're just inch-long lepidopterans.

[Omphaloskepsis]

10. The cover for my down comforter would be made with..

The skin of a thousand kittens.

[XemaSab]

13. suweet...

[XemaSab]

15. two words: lawn jockey

:P

[uncle ray]

40. i have one.

i got it several years ago when i bought my first home. of course to mock all the other people that would have a lawn jockey. oddly, i've NEVER had anybody say anything about how it may be offensive(he's a black jockey), even when i lived in a predominantly minority neighborhood. this year i stuck him in storage, the joke has gotten old since nobody gets it's a joke, or takes it seriously for that matter! he'll get a surrealist paintjob soon to revive him. my girlfriend said the other day i should paint him up to look like GWB...hmmmm.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

17. I would have a Hummer in the driveway!

:puke:

[XemaSab]

19. word.

What would the license plate say? Any stickers? :bounce:

[Omphaloskepsis]

20. KTY KLR

[XemaSab]

21. And what do the stickers say?

[Omphaloskepsis]

22. You call it a blanket.

I think of it as the end result of all the porn on the internet.

[XemaSab]

23. Wow, that makes no sense!

:bounce:

[XemaSab]

29. I've decided on a good sticker:

We'll kick their ass
And take their gas!

[SongOfTheRayne]

24. hmmmm.....

it would have a bomb shelter made out of sand bags full of powdered ivory. :)

[FuzzySlippers]

25. A coat rack with rhinocerous horns for hooks.

:bounce: :bounce:

[slybacon9]

26. Cieling mural of cartoon Mohammed holding hands with Michael Jackson

well... you asked.

I'm trying to paint over it.

[XemaSab]

28. ROFL!!!!!

Wow!

[FuzzySlippers]

27. Plenty panda steaks in the freezer.

:bounce: :bounce:

[rug]

32. A Montgomery tax bill

[ET Awful]

33. There would be giant penis statues on the lawn and the front door

would look like a giant vagina :evilgrin:

[Benfea]

34. Macintosh computers!

Or are you using some other meaning of the word "PC"?

[greendog]

35. Something like this...

...probably a second home. Gets used 2-3 weeks a year.

Want tackier? Just spend more money.

[DS1]

36. Gas Chamber Simulator Ride, and a little toy train that comes around

every 7 minutes

[Bucky]

38. Indoor heating by coal...

...shoveled by slave labor from a Vietnamese orphanage

[khashka]

39. I'm way beyond PC

I can't describe my home or I'd offend virtually evryone.

I did get a note from a petsitter - "We love you. We love your cat. But your house is the scariest fucking place my wife and I have ever seen!" I guess the human skulls might upset people, but scary? Me?


Khash.

[politicat]

41. Coal power plant to run the Grand Theft Auto-playing game system.

Dirty coal plant.

[jakefrep]

42. It would have a den festooned with Third Rech memorabilia...

..the couch would have throw pillows filled with bald eagle feathers.

[XemaSab]

45. How about a giant nazi standard

with a real, stuffed eagle on top of a giant swastika?

[tarkus]

44. Of course, the house would have to be huge and suburban...

- At least a 40 minute SUV commute for someone who works downtown
- At least a 1/2 Acre yard to soak with fertilizers
- As many rooms to heat and cool as possible

[XemaSab]

47. Not to mention a 1/2 acre lawn to WATER

(if the house is out west)

[IronLionZion]

46. Ivory furniture covered with baby seal skin

and a freezer stocked with the meat of the most endangered animals on earth. mmmm....;)

The house will be made of pure rainforest wood and will look over a town to give them the impression that I'm looking down on them all. Of course everyone will be able to see my house at all times. My fireplace will be burning $100 bills and fine artwork only.

My all-women service staff will be made up of the hottest women wearing only......OK let's not get too carried away :evilgrin:

[TheBaldyMan]

48. Slave quarters

not in the house but a few shacks at the bottom of the garden, I believe there is reserved planning permission for this at the 'Western Whitehouse'

[_testify_]

49. Live cheerleaders shackled to the basement walls!

Or did I go too far?

[mitchum]

50. A deer farm surrounding the whole thing

[XemaSab]

51. Yes, Mr. Vice President