Fire Chief Arrested For Having Sex With Lamb

[matcom]

<snip>

A Mesa Fire Department battalion chief was placed on administrative leave on Monday after being arrested in a bestiality case.

Police say Leroy Johnson went to a residence and knocked on the door of a home where a 13-year-old girl was staying home alone this weekend. When she didn’t answer, he went into the back yard, police said, and took a lamb into a nearby barn.

"One could certainly ascertain that if you're in a barn and in a secluded area with a lamb and you’re behind her and your pants are down by your ankles, then an unnatural sex act is probably occurring,” said Lisa Allen of the Maricopa County Sheriff’s office. :rofl:

Johnson is facing misdemeanor criminal trespassing and public sexual indecency charges.

Officials with the Mesa Fire Department, responding to Johnson’s arrest , said he’s been an exemplary employee for the past 26 years, adding that they are shocked and surprised.

Johnson will remain on administrative leave pending an investigation by the Maricopa County Sheriff's Office.

http://www.azcentral.com/community/mesa/articles/0306mesa-official.html

[azmouse]

1. When I saw that reported on the news last night

I just thought... Ok, that's too much info! :puke:

[xchrom]

2. poor traumatised lamb!

[ohiosmith]

3. It's always the guy's fault! How do you know that the lamb wasn't asking

for it?

[SofaKingLiberal]

21. Remember, when you sleep with a lamb,

you sleep with every lamb that lamb slept with and all the lambs those lambs slept with, etc, etc.

Edit - Posted in wrong spot.

[Call Me Wesley]

4. Yes, why can't they just use a nice hotel?

[meegbear]

23. I loved the part when he was in court ...

Judge: "And seeing that the sheep was under 18 years of age ...."
:rofl:

[Call Me Wesley]

26. Except for the sperms waiting to be launched,

I thought it was the best episode of the whole movie. Especially the last shot, where he's sitting in a street corner drinking Woolite. ;)

[Rowdyboy]

5. "I wish I could quit ewe....."

[no name no slogan]

8. ew, that is ba-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-d

n/t

[Deja Q]

14. I wanted to say that!

:cry:
















:rofl:

[Bucky]

16. Yes, that joke was sheer brilliance. (Get it? *sheer* brilliance? SHEER?!)

Oh never mind.

[Rowdyboy]

39. Thank God this didn't happen in South Dakota!

At least the poor lamb can get an abortion....

[Catfight]

34. "I wish I could quit ewe..." okay...I'm laughing so hard I'm crying. nt

[Rowdyboy]

36. It was a cheap shot, but SOMEBODY was gonna take it!

What can I say? :evilgrin:

[Richard Steele]

40. And my semi-weekly 'worst pun I heard lately' award goes to....Rowdyboy!

Extra points for the topical movie reference.

Here's yer pie:

[Rowdyboy]

42. Aw, shucks, now you've embarrassed me....I'm feeling all ....

sheepish

[BigMcLargehuge]

6. missing quote from Matcom's clip

"Officials with the Mesa Fire Department, responding to Johnson’s arrest , said he’s been an exemplary employee for the past 26 years, adding that they are shocked and surprised, but should have realized something was amis when he requisitioned 55 gallons of Mint Jelly."

[edbermac]

7. Let's be gentle with each other...

[DS1]

9. What's the big deal? It's just a fuzzy Dalmation

[MissB]

10. Why am I even shocked anymore?

:rofl:

[warrens]

11. Sounds like the teenage girl was the original target

They should consider looking into his other activities.

[Lars39]

52. Yep.

[blindpig]

12. One question

Have you bathed in the blood of the lamb?

[leftofthedial]

13. that's so baaaaaaaaaaad

takes some of the heat off Wyoming though.


maybe he was just checking the sprinkler system.

[yellowcanine]

15. "....pending an investigation"????? That lamb ain't talking is it?

[blondeatlast]

24. It will if Sheriff Joe can find a way to make it so.

Preferably on camera with the local and (for him, God willing) national media there...

He loves to give firefighters a very hard time, for some reason.

I'm a Maricopa County resident, and I fucking despise the man.

[Bucky]

17. Jeeze Matcom. Where you get this shit from?

You are the king of finding oddball, perverted, and weirdass stories on the internet. Man, you should write a column

[boston bean]

18. Oh Christ! I can't stop laughing, am I bad?!? nt

[blondeatlast]

19. Joe Arpaio, Maricopa County Sheriff. loves to pick on firefighters.

Publicity whore extraordinaire, too.



Can YOUR sheriff claim EIGHT pages of Google images???

Trust me, there's more than meets the eye going on here.

[Lochloosa]

20. He should call Neal Horsley and get some pointers...

you know...correct size stool to stand on, 3 legs or 4....

http://www.newshounds.us/2005/05/06/bizarre_sex_habits_of_the_extreme_rightwing.php

Colmes said he thought there were a lot of people in the audience who grew up on farms, are living on farms now, raising kids on farms and "and I don't think they are dating Elsie right now. You know what I'm saying?"

Horsley said, "You experiment with anything that moves when you are growing up sexually. You're naive. You know better than that... If it's warm and it's damp and it vibrates you might in fact have sex with it."

[Burma Jones]

22. Hey, Stop the cross species love bashing

Fire Chiefs need love too.........lovely pliant and unquestioning love, with soft curly hair, big brown eves and the voice of an angel...........and mint jelly.......


I draw the line at same sex bestaility though, who knows where that slippery slope will lead......

[KamaAina]

25. Hmmm... is there such a thing as K-Y mint jelly?

:spank: :hide:

[jeanarrett]

27. Check out this sick prick too!!!

http://www.freep.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20060303/NEWS06/603030417/1008

I wonder if the firefighter got the idea here?

But no wonder, with a mug like that it's no wonder he couldn't get a real date.

[Benfea]

28. WTF is this kind of story doing in the real news?

Oh, that's right. We don't have a real media anymore. Just a massive "infotainment" industry feeding an endless stream of tripe.

[Dave Reynolds]

29. "The girl heard the chief saying

'call me da-a-a-a-a-ady!!'"

[WCGreen]

30. You can't pull the wool over Lisa Allen's eyes......

[WI_DEM]

31. So the 13 year old girl doesn't answer so he takes the next best

thing? a lamb. I ? what his original intention was in going to this house in the first place.

[Hardrada]

32. The lamb's attorney is in the process of formally

filing charges and will be taking questions from the press tomorrow at 1 PM. The lamb has nothing to say at this time.

[matcom]

33. Scott McClellan will actually take QUESTIONS?

:P

[hholli11]

35. Dear Gawd...

I wonder if there;s a way to determine his party affiliation.

<<<I would have too much fun forwarding it if I knew>>>

[Shine]

37. Oh, ewe!!

;)

[hippiechick]

38. So what would he have done with the 13 year old ???

:wow: :mad:

[rug]

41. If convicted, he'll have to register as a sex offender.

And he won't be allowed near meat for 10 years.

[Fleshdancer]

43. Leroy had a little lamb, little lamb, little lamb....

Leroy had a little lamb
its fleece was white as snow!

[Poiuyt]

44. So in a few months, a lamb will see Leroy and say, "That's my faaaaather."

[XemaSab]

45. .

[MrScorpio]

46. Mary Had a Little Lamb...

Then the Fire Chief fucked it

[meow2u3]

47. He's trying to create a race of sheeple

Real ones -- the human-animal hybrids -- as opposed to sheeple in the metaphorical sense of the word. :evilgrin:

[Katherine Brengle]

48. matcom--what's with all the freaky animal-f*ing stories tonight? lol. nt

[Road Scholar]

49. Hurt his back trying to kiss the lamb. LOL

[elshiva]

50. Poor lamb.

:(

On edit: He should have used a stuffed animal.

[Floogeldy]

51. I admit that the act is wholly immoral.

But, really? After all, no Constitutional guarantees were violated, except for that poor Fireman's pursuit of happiness.

I mean, that animal surely didn't mind as much as it would have if it had been slaughtered for whatever!

Honestly, what do we really know about sheep orgasms?

:silly:

[elshiva]

53. But stuffed animals are sexier!

Stuffed Animal (sung by Annette Funicello)

Stuffed Animal, Stuffed Animal
A Stuffed Animal is more than a toy,
Soft and cuddly and not like a boy....

Sure a boy can hold your hand and whisper in your ear
But the words he says to you are not always what you want to hear...

That was from the movie "Pajama Party"

[Floogeldy]

54. Such a cool movie.

:)

[sakabatou]

55. Once it reaches man to box turtle

the world will end.*

*GOP thinking, forgot who thought of this.

[doc03]

56. We had a local caught having sex with a Rotwiller last summer.