I was just let into my crush's intimate zone this morning!

[StaggerLee]

She came into my cube and asked me to adjust the hood on her sweater (it was across her upper back and she didn't want it all askew)

Yeah, so I straightened it out for her and tried not to pass out...she smelled so good.

Damn I hate having a crush. AND I'm 38 years old! :wtf:

[Deja Q]

1. and I was thinking of something slightly different!

:blush:

[MadAsHellNewYorker]

2. slightly?

:rofl:

[StaggerLee]

3. lol

That's cool.
It's a crush so it's not gonna happen.
She does not feel the same way towards me.

:hi:

[Ivan Sputnik]

4. Are you sure

she doesn't feel the same way? Seems like an odd thing to ask a male co-worker to do.

[StaggerLee]

6. We are pretty close because we both hired in on the same day two years ago

and we both can confide in each other.

I really don't detect anything from her that would consitute "feelings" above and beyond platonic. I guess I could be wrong.

:shrug:

[Taverner]

5. Ask her out man

The worst she can do is say no.

[StaggerLee]

7. True

But then I run that risk of messing up what we have friendship-wise, dontcha think?

[Taverner]

8. Would you rather the rest of your life that you sat there...

Coveting what you can't have?

You only live once...ask her out!

[StaggerLee]

10. Of course you're right

Are women as coy as all that? Damn.

Well, if she says no at least I'll still have my NCAA bracket to follow...

[Laelth]

9. Here's my advice, for what it's worth.

Women will let you know if they want something more than friendship. If you have even the slightest feeling that she doesn't want a more intimate relationship with you, then your feeling is probably well-founded, and you should not ask her out.

If she wants more, she'll let you know. Women are the sexual selectors in our species, and whether they admit it or not, they know it. Most women do not take well to uninvited propositions.

That's been my experience, anyway.

-Laelth

[StaggerLee]

11. That's just it!

I don't want to creep her out.

I think I better do a little more gauging of the situation. If I could get her in a conversation regarding how she would handle a situation like mine maybe it would shed some light....and then maybe I could ask her point blank once we are comfortable discussing the issue.

Hmmm.

[Laelth]

12. I asked Mrs. Laelth her opinion on your dilemma.

She said, "Hey, go ahead. Ask her out."

Then I asked her, "How many times did you remain friends with a guy who asked you out but whom you rejected?"

She thought for a moment and said, "Ah, I see your point."

:woohoo: (another small victory for Laelth - they're rare, after all)

Trust me, the girl doesn't want to hurt your feelings. If she rejects you, you'll just be a reminder to her that she has hurt you. That will make her feel uncomfortable around you.

At this stage, it's not worth it to ask her out. She'll let you know, very clearly, if she wants more.

-Laelth

[StaggerLee]

15. The last thing I want to do is make her feel uncomfortable

And working on the same floor would make that excruciating for us both.

Good advice. I think I'm going to give it more time.

Thanks, to you and the Mrs. :)

[Laelth]

18. No problem.

Keep flirting, and keep being friendly. Make her laugh. Compliment her, and see how she takes it. A response to a compliment is always a good test of interest.

And good luck! :thumbsup:

-Laelth

[Sequoia]

13. How about lunch? It's safe.

How old is she? Is she going out with anyone? Does she need help moving anything heavy at home? Think of another way, but don't give up yet. Better to find out then live with regret.

[StaggerLee]

14. She recently broke up with her boyfriend

She's 25. Her ex-boyfriend is my age. I know it seems like a pretty big age difference but she's attracted to older men.
The reason why she broke up with him was due to trust issues, mostly on his end.

Anyway-

Lunch is only a half hour so I think it would be hard to work in a conversation that deep.

I think I'd better hang back a bit and observe the situation a little better. I don't want to screw up my friendship.

Damn.

[Sequoia]

20. There's hope yet.

Since she broke up she may not be ready for a new relationship, but that messed up jacket thing could be a sign (signal flag time!). Maybe she's shy. Just be happy around her and give her encouragement, praise her work, etc. Offer to get her a coffe when you go on break or something. She may not want an office romance, those could get icky if it doesn't work out, so maybe she's testing the water. Maybe a group of you can get together for a drink after work. Let her know you love your mom and family, cute kittens, etc. Sounds a little corny but you can work it in.

[StaggerLee]

22. I think you may have hit the nail on the head

I do give her compliments and encouragement when she needs it. Maybe that's all she wants from me which is fine because I really do enjoy our short daily conversations. Positive reenforcement is a powerful thing when one is going through difficutl times.

I'm definitely going to be tuning in for any other signs she may throw my way.

She's a good kid. I did encourage her to find time for herself after her breakup. She actually moved out on her own and seems to be doing well with it. The breakup was very hard on her.

[leftofthedial]

16. yeah, hiding the boner is embarassing at work

:blush:

[StaggerLee]

17. Heh

I sat back down right away!

:thumbsup:

[Missy Vixen]

19. Ask her to lunch

>Damn I hate having a crush. AND I'm 38 years old!<

I'm 45. I have a raging crush. I'm married, though, so it's always going to be just a crush.

Even if lunch is just half an hour, maybe you should invite her. It could be a "friendly" thing. If it works out well, invite her again.

I'm crossing my fingers for you.
Julie

[StaggerLee]

21. I do want to ask her to lunch

I don't think that it would be a problem getting a lunch date at all because we've lunched before but it has been almost a year since that's happened. I didn't feel that way about her then. Times were much simpler ...

Thanks for the good wishes Julie! :hi: