Trey Parker & Matt Stone's message to Scientologists everywhere

[Susang]

From a statement sent to Daily Variety:

So, Scientology, you may have won THIS battle, but the million-year war for earth has just begun! Temporarily anozinizing our episode will NOT stop us from keeping Thetans forever trapped in your pitiful man-bodies. Curses and drat! You have obstructed us for now, but your feeble bid to save humanity will fail! Hail Xenu!!!

-Trey Parker and Matt Stone, servants of the dark lord Xenu

http://www.variety.com/VR1117939918.html

[dorktv]

1. Those two are nutters.

[SteppingRazor]

9. Nah, it's scientology that's nutters...

To a Scientologist, their statement makes perfect, if blasphemous, sense.

[Monkey see Monkey Do]

12. Only if said Scientologist has paid the requisite $$$ to get to OTIII

which is quite a lot of $$$. (I want to say approx. $100,000 but please don't quote me on that.)

[dorktv]

45. True but then so was Christianity in it's early days.

Only they never demanded you hand over all of your money before you could be one.

[DS1]

2. Outstanding

:-)

[Susang]

4. I wonder

If they'll start an official Xenuian counter-religion? :D

[LynneSin]

5. Hell I'll join

:D

[Fenris]

6. Holy shit, that would be wonderful!

Scientology Reformation! :D

[dorktv]

7. wait until they get Scientologist fundies.

[no name no slogan]

15. That's the only kind of Scientologist

If you are a Scientologist, you are not allowed to question the un-erring word of L. Ron Hubbard. If you do, you will be branded a "Subversive Person" (SP) and be kicked out of the "church". Also, any Scientologist friend or family member will not be allowed to have contact with you, or they risk being kicked out, too.

[dolo amber]

16. That's what chaps my balls

The book is called "DIANEtics". I'm Diane. They named the *religion* wrong. :grr:

[no name no slogan]

18. Good point. Should call it "Elronanetics".

Or maybe "Whackonetics" would be more accurate.

[laheina]

21. I've been told some pretty messed up stories.

And these were first hand accounts, mind you.

But what I don't understand, and maybe you'd know about this, is that any human person is fallible--are they making the claim, even implicitly, that Hubbard is not? It seems like that is what is implied in there being *nothing* debatable.

But maybe I'm thinking about this the wrong way? :shrug:

[no name no slogan]

24. IIRC, they believe that L Ron was fallible, except for doctrine

if it was Dianetics/Scientology-related, it was unquestionable. I'm not a Scientologist (nor have I ever been one), but I know a number of people involved in cultwatch activities, and hear their stories.

[laheina]

25. Thank you!

Thanks for your response. Do you have any resources at hand?

It's no big deal, but if you have any that you'd recommend then I can start there. :) I'd like to look into some aspects of this a little more.

[no name no slogan]

26. best site IMHO is

"Operation Clambake" (www.Xenu.net). Yes, they actually registered Xenu.net as their URL (according to Scientology doctrine, Xenu is the evil galactic overlord who created much of earth's problems 70 billion years ago), and has a lot of good information, from an anti-Scientology point of view.

If you're looking for the pro-Scientology point of view, best to get it from the horse's mouth at www.Scientology.org, the church's official site.

I'll try not to be too biased because I believe everyone should make up their own minds about it, but there are a lot of very questionable practices in Scientology and plenty of horror stories from ex-members.

[philosophie_en_rose]

34. don't look the scientology horse in the mouth.

the website is fine for information, but I hope that no one signs up for anything. First of all, nothing is ever free with Scientology. Second, they'll call your house or send you letters - even if you sign up with a fake name.

Someone in my dorm signed up to get flyers to put in a project on religions. She was flabbergasted, when she started to get phonecalls for the funny name she used.

[mdmc]

40. thanks for the link

[TheBaldyMan]

37. even the bit that said the universe would cease to exist on

Ron's death ?

That was always the deal breaker with me.

Scientology was started as L. Ron Hubbard's tax break, only in America.

[Blue-Jay]

14. I bet they'd nail "95 Feces" to the Scientology Center door.

I'd contribute to that.

[mikeytherat]

22. That would make them LOO-therans!

Sorry, couldn't resist!

mikey_the_rat

[Squeech]

10. HAHAHAHAHA

Maybe Xenu *is* the Flying Spaghetti Monster!

[ThomCat]

27. That would be AWESOME!

I'd support it. :P

[Fenris]

3. That really is a perfect response.

:)

[Initech]

8. Yet more reason why those two guys rule!

That was a perfect response, bar none!

[Rosie1223]

11. I've never watched South Park

maybe it's time to start.

:-)

[arwalden]

13. Tom Cruise Won't Come Out Of The Closet!

[bleedingheart]

19. that is the one episode I missed and everyone saw it and

I feel so left out....

boo hooo hooo...

[uhhuh]

30. Hey Bleedingheart!

If haven't already, go to the site mentioned above www.xenu.net ! they have the episode posted and available for download!!

[TheBaldyMan]

38. just for you

link to the infamous scenes

Tom goes into the closet
http://livedigital.com/ACdAkQDsGg/content/23685/c79

Tom won't come out of the closet
http://livedigital.com/ACdAkQDsGg/content/19980/c79

Enjoy!

[Initech]

20. I love the ending of that episode

Especially how they changed all the names to "John Smith"! :rofl:

[Karenina]

23. No matter...

His closet is made of one-way glass. He can't see out but... or is that butt... :evilgrin:

[gollygee]

17. LOL - I bet they're a little happy to get all the free publicity

:D

[flvegan]

28. Timmay and The Lords of the Underworld will NOT be playing

at any Scientology functions, either.

THAT'S hitting them where it hurts.

[WindRavenX]

29. LOL

Oh, I so want them to have Tom Cruise replace Chief :rofl:

[peekaloo]

31. lol.....rush the dvd boys!

I looked forward to seeing this ep on Wednesday since I had missed the original airing.

Instead i got choked on Chef's salty chocolate balls and smeared by Mr. Hankey.

[Submariner]

32. Tom, your mission, should you decide to accept it

is to fly Topgun into Iraq and crash in the middle of the Sunni triangle...please.

[philosophie_en_rose]

33. Perfect! SP=SouthPark.

:evilgrin:

[ET Awful]

44. LOL, I hadn't thought of that

:rofl:

[mdmc]

35. lol

[MrSlayer]

36. Excellent response to those imbeciles.

Scientology is just beyond stupid.

[sleipnir]

39. Ha. Stupid Fucking Scientologists.

I love it when someone ridicules that idiotic joke of a cult.

When do they all get to drink the Kool-aide? I hope it's soon.

[Chovexani]

41. Oh my god I love those guys.

They win at life. :toast:

[mdmc]

42. I just watched that show

very clever!

[ET Awful]

43. My ass Cruise didn' threaten Viacom . . . that's standard $cientology

operating procedure.

If people don't bow to your will, after they are declared suppressive persons by the "church," official $cientology doctrine states in very exact words that they "May be deprived of property or injured by any means by any Scientologist without any discipline of the Scientologist. May be tricked, sued or lied to or destroyed."

It's part of their written doctrine.

[no name no slogan]

46. You down with OT III

yeah you know me

[sakabatou]

47. BWAHAHAH!

[TroubleMan]

48. You can see it on youtube:

http://youtube.com/results?search=south+park+closet&search_type=search_videos&search=Search