CAPTION the College GOP Loudmouth

[Michigander4Dean]

From this story:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=364&topic_id=687014&mesg_id=687014

The guy standing in the back is a candidate for Chair of the the College Republicans at Central Michigan University.

[charlie and algernon]

1. Dan Looser, explaining why he killed Johnny redshirt

for having the gall not to declare President Bush Supreme God and Leader.

[rppper]

2. circa 1966....little johnny ashcroft leads an anointing ceremony.....

...the the disgust of the college agnostic front's monthly get together. gene whipplesburg, seen here in the red shirt, apparently found jesus and began to speakin tounges, much to the humor of fellow agnostic terence bigburger, seen to whippleburg's immediate left. jerry smirkenpucker, seen sitting behind ashcroft, had to call emergency services a few seconds after the photo was taken when ashcroft apparently succumed to the oil he was using and fainted during a singing of "let the eagle soar". ashcroft is currently resting in southern babtist fundalmentalist hospital in fair condition.

[darkstar]

17. Good stuff. I L'edOL.

:toast:

[UrbScotty]

3. Rush Jr.: "Being an @$$ is hard...

"...but if I'm elected, I promise free OxyContin for everyone!"

Guy in the red shirt: "I am so drunk I could {censored in accordance with DU rules}"

Guy in the white shirt in the back: "Dude, shove it, will you, Hannity?"

Guy in the black sweater: "I'm making big bucks off this"

[begin_within]

4. Guy on phone: "You have got to see this. A guy is talking rightwing crap,

and every single person in the room is either giggling or pretending to fall asleep. God I wish someone would take a picture of this!"

[Oeditpus Rex]

5. Midland freshman Dennis Lennox II,

a candidate for chairman of the College Republicans, tells members of the organization he has his hair styled at Home Depot and buys his ties from a specialty shop in Kalamazoo that recycles kitchen furniture from the 1960s. Lennox lost the election to Haslett junior Leslie Little, who ran on a platform of color coordination.

[UrbScotty]

14. Good one (nt)

[MissB]

20. Most excellent.

:applause:

[johnnie]

6. Puke Lennox singing

"Let the eagle soar,
Like she's never soared before.
From rocky coast to golden shore,
Let the mighty eagle soar.
Soar with healing in her wings,
As the land beneath her sings:
'Only God, no other kings.'"

[billyskank]

7. I think the guy in the burgundy shirt has died

Maybe bullshit poisoning? :shrug:

[eyepaddle]

8. Wow, you're on a roll

a series of great posts, ranging from satire to fine art, a heckuva day Billy! :thumbsup:

[SalmonChantedEvening]

9. The guy in the back row next to the one on the cell phone...

Is stabbing himself in the eye with an imaginary icepick.

[TK421]

10. DAMN! Why do they always wear the butt-ugliest ties!

[yurbud]

19. I suggest that we all wear these simple lattice ties to show our

strong bond, like the interlacing relationship of corporate America and religion.

[ghostsofgiants]

11. Cell phone guy: "Oh man, he just let one cut..."

"I think he killed the dude in the red shirt!"

[DS1]

12. College Republicans are such dicks

They were out protesting the Vagina Monologues on my campus awhile back, saying that it was bad for women.

Since when do Republicans care about women in the first place?

[Michigander4Dean]

15. What do they know about women, much less their rights? | nt

[Mz Pip]

13. "After I am elected

I promise to enlist in the armed forces. I will volunteer for Iraq because I believe what the President tells me.

NOT! Psyche!! - about the volunteering part, not about believing in Bush."

Mz Pip
:dem:

[jakefrep]

16. "Let us pray..."

"...for the quick death of Hugo Chavez and all of the leaders of those leftist banana republics in Latin America."

He appears to be in the early stages of a "Pat Robertson looking like he's taking a wicked shit" prayer.

[yurbud]

18. and I don't know any words what our lord and savior W caint

pronounce...

[yurbud]

21. what kind of fascist fart-knocker wears a tie in college?

Why don't they just wait until they're assistant managers at Walmart?

Wearing a tie when you aren't required to is like hitting your balls with a ball peen hammer without someone holding a gun to your head.

[Michigander4Dean]

22. Maybe he wanted to fake it

Maybe he wanted to prentend that he can look good.

[jane_pippin]

23. Though initially tolerant of Jim's patriotism and love for Neil Diamond,

eventually the class tired of him starting each day with a rousing outburst of: "They’re coming to America! Every time that flag’s unfurled--They’re coming to America!"

Said one student (bottom, left): "Hearing it makes me wish I was dead." Another, who asked not to be identified, said "It (the singing) wouldn't be so bad if it wasn't 8am. Or in this concrete room. Or if it wasn't being sung by Jim. Or at all. Yeah. If it wasn't being sung at all, it wouldn't be so bad."

Jim is undeterred by his critics and says he has no plans to discontinue his daily tribute. "Like our president, I will stay the course and continue to express myself and my love and support for America through song. You know what I say to those who doubt my commitment? Jim's class: Love it or leave it!"

In a related story, enrollment for Public Speaking 101 has seen its largest drop rate in campus history.

[Initech]

24. "Hey... guy in the red shirt... why do you hate America?"