Beefcake Jesus Posters... Is This Right Or Wrong?

[arwalden]

Poll question: Beefcake Jesus Posters... Is This Right Or Wrong?

Yowza... what a hottie!! (Who knew, eh??) Hubba-hubba!

http://www.allposters.com/gallery.asp?aid=218029

[XemaSab]

1. Shouldn't there be a Mary Magdaline with heaving bosoms

in that first pic?

[Spider Jerusalem]

3. No, there should be a vaguely epicene, doe-eyed John

(the 'beloved' disciple)...on his knees.

(Leonardo depicted John as androgynous and somewhat effiminate in his painting of the Last Supper, you know...)

[Chemical Bill]

33. Some say that was John...

others say it was MM.

Bill

[Spider Jerusalem]

38. Except the people who say it was John are all art historians.

Who probably have a better idea than the authors of Holy Blood, Holy Grail or The Da Vinci Code.

[khashka]

65. The gospel changes meaning

if you follow John or Paul

But can't you ever let it be the Mary of it all?


Tori Amos.



Khash.

[Oeditpus Rex]

13. What size?

:popcorn:

[XemaSab]

16. HUGH.

[Oeditpus Rex]

18. Hugh Buzums

:thumbsup:

[ForrestGump]

22. Here she is...

I think Carmen Electra could play her in the next film:

[XemaSab]

52. Wow!

:wow:

[ceile]

2. so wrong!

But I guess I shouldn't talk. I used to have a black Jesus poster and he was pretty buff.

[arwalden]

4. One Of These?

[Lilith Velkor]

6. That's more like it

:thumbsup:

[momophile]

15. damn, I'd follow him!!

:hi:

[arwalden]

17. (Follow-Him, Follow-Him) Follow Him Where Ever He May Go-ooo...

There isn't an ocean too deep (too deep)
A mountain so high it can keep,
Keep us away-y-y-y,
away from His lo-o-ove...

[Lone_Star_Dem]

5. WOW!

I feel dirty you are not supposed to think Jesus looked hot. My Catholic upbringing is coming back to haunt me. x(

I was always under the impression that he was browner than that... You know more like the one on the right below.

[no name no slogan]

10. No. Jeebus was blonde and blue-eyed

gave you the crazy idea he was semetic looking?

[Lone_Star_Dem]

11. I don't know what I was thinking

I forgot he was of Northern European decent. :crazy:

[Left Is Write]

21. It's also highly unlikely...

that he was put together like a body builder.

[Lone_Star_Dem]

34. I know what you mean

Perhaps the artist usually does romance novel covers?

[GirlinContempt]

44. Well, he WAS a carpenter

[Left Is Write]

48. Yes, but I doubt it gave him a six-pack.

[GirlinContempt]

49. Who knows

[LostinVA]

41. Like Yassar Arafat...

[long_green]

67. Jesus looked a lot like John Elway...

only taller.

[ldf]

83. the one on the right?

isn't that a young bob vila?

:-)

[ForrestGump]

7. It's very disturbing. Unless on black velvet, of course...

He was a righteous dude.



They say that cat Jesus was a bad mother...
Watch your mouth!
But I'm talkin' 'bout Jesus
Oh, then we can dig it...

Pity he went mainstream, in the end... :-(

[LuckyLib]

70. The Freshmaker looks like Kenny Loggins in his heyday! LOL

[Iris]

72. "Shut your mouth!"

very funny

[LaurenG]

8. Wrong, no way

after all he was man made perfect. He looks pretty darn perfect in any of those.

[sundog]

9. be better if he didn't shave his chest

[arwalden]

12. That's Not Shaved...

... that's waxed!

[Duncan Grant]

59. ;^)

:evilgrin: :hi:

[sundog]

75. :)

:hi:

:pals:

[Roon]

14. Remember what Queer Duck said about Jesus?

You mean the shirtless dude with the killer abs?

[Spider Jerusalem]

19. It's actually a GOOD thing Jesus got crucified when he did.

At least we were spared this:

[Hobarticus]

20. What Would Jesus Bench?

Just askin'.

[arwalden]

24. ~~

:spray:

[anarch]

30. Jesus was way cool - he could probably bench like 800 lbs.

Jesus was way cool
Everybody liked Jesus
Everybody wanted to hang out with him
Anything he wanted to do, he did
He turned water into wine
And if he wanted to
He could have turned wheat into marijuana
Or sugar into cocaine
Or vitamin pills into amphetamines

He walked on the water
And swam on the land
He would tell these stories
And people would listen
He was really cool

If you were blind or lame
You just went to Jesus
And he would put his hands on you
And you would be healed
That's so cool

He could've played guitar better than Hendrix
He could've told the future
He could've baked the most delicious cake in the world
He could've scored more goals than Wayne Gretzky
He could've danced better than Barishnikov
Jesus could have been funnier than any comedian you can think of
Jesus was way cool

He told people to eat his body and drink his blood
That's so cool
Jesus was so cool
But then some people got jealous of how cool he was
So they killed him
But then he rose from the dead
He rose from the dead, danced around
Then went up to heaven
I mean, that's so cool
Jesus was way cool

No wonder there are so many Christians

- King Missile

[robertpaulsen]

39. Detachable Jesus?

Thanks, I almost forgot how much I used to love listening to that!

[khashka]

63. LOL!

I was listening to that today...


Jesus was way cool!


Funnily enough, most christians don't like that song.....


Khash.

[trof]

23. Where is the Mary Magdalen cheesecake?

Us heteros need eye candy too.
;-)

[Deja Q]

25. A gay male artist with too much time, amongst other things, on his hands?

Just a guess.

[Ilsa]

26. Blessed are they that pump iron, for they shall be buff and get all

the chicks.

Blessed are they that can wear a crown of thorns upon their head without bleeding, because getting blood in your eyes is a pain.

[jukes]

27. BUT

all shredded depictions of him shd display his whip, also.

[long_green]

28. The artist(s) is in serious need of therapy

Both pictures are funnier than hell.

[anarch]

29. dammit...I canna find a good picture o' the fightin' jesus

This will have to suffice:

[many a good man]

31. Careful! He's pissed!

[6000eliot]

32. Fuck! Our Lord is HOT!

And all tied up yet.

[beyurslf]

35. I think any image of a person being tortured by an ancient device

used to kill people is "wrong" when it is used to glorify something. I don't understand people and crucifixes at all. Do they not know what that was used for? Seems sick to me.

[bigwillq]

36. If I click that link

are there naughty images?? :shrug: I am at work.

[arwalden]

54. No... It's Legit.

[Chemical Bill]

37. I prefer the "Buddy Jesus" from the movie "Dogma". n/t

[LostinVA]

40. My SO just said they look the cover of a romance novel

Is that you, Fabio???

[XemaSab]

46. Hence the Mary M. with heaving bosoms...

Hopefully in a "swooning" position....

[xmas74]

42. I never thought of Jesus having an obsession w/ the

Bowflex.

It just seems wrong. If he were that strong he would have been kicking everyones asses.

Jesus was not an asskicker.

[Redstone]

43. Looking damn white in those pictures, he is...must be blood loss.

Redstone

[Magrittes Pipe]

45. I can't wait to see Tom of Finland's "Pieta!"

:bounce:

[khashka]

85. You are a very bad man!

Khash,

[undeterred]

47. here he is with shorter hair

[smitty]

50. These pictures of Jesus will cause Christians around the world

to riot and burn down KFCs and McDonald's. You cannot defame the Messiah!
Heads will roll! I blame the Mossad!

[smitty]

51. He's hot, He's Abercrombie and Fitch hot!

[Kerrytravelers]

53. My one question is:

How do some of you DUers find this stuff? I go one the Internet(s)... hell, I even do random searches for random things just for shits and giggles sometimes. But I never come across some of the strange shit you people find. The brittany spears naked giving birth statue/ I would never have found that. The bushfish morans were sticking to their hummers... I never would have found that either. Some DUers on here have such talent for finding... well... er...uh... just plain old weird shit!

P.S. Keep it coming, I eat this weird stuff up!

[Redstone]

55. Look at his right hand in the right-hand picture...Looks like he's saying

"We're #1!"

Redstone

[JuniperLea]

56. I expect to see you all in hell for this!

Bring beer.





And chocolate.

[LaraMN]

57. Ok, but I want a "beer-gut Jesus" selection, for parity.

:P

[dolo amber]

58. I'd hit it

[Duncan Grant]

60. What's with the ropes?

Does Jesus need a "safe" word? :evilgrin:

[arwalden]

61. OMG!

:rofl: :rofl: :thumbsup:

[khashka]

62. Freaked me out....

Wanting to have sweaty nasty sex with Jesus must be a sin, right?


I'm going to hell.....


Khash.

[arwalden]

64. Here's A Site That Invites You To Take A Bath With Jesus

http://www.datejesus.com/bathe/

[khashka]

68. Oh Lord that brings back memories

Easter Sunday, I was at Heathrow Airport,


And this woman starts screaming "I've seen Jesus!"

I kept trying to tell her I was just a dude with long hair.


It got weird. I tried to buy a cup of coffee- and the guy asked me "Are you really Jesus?" "Uhm no, i just want some coffee. I can't do salvation, I'm not qualified." Are you sure your not Jesus? I think I would know!


Khash - the fake Jesus,

[Bucky]

87. Wait, how can Jesus bathe? Wouldn't he just bounce out of the tub?

Or does he turn it into wine first?

[begin_within]

66. Jesus appeared to me twice today.

[asthmaticeog]

69. .

[Burma Jones]

71. Christ was NOT, I Repeat - NOT - in a Hair Band

I tell you what, these things become Gay Kitsch, you'll see the fundies squealing in protest for sure.

[Iris]

73. And why does he look like a teenager?

or a college student?

[TheMightyFavog]

74. Nobody fucks with The Jesus!

[name not needed]

81. 8 year olds, dude.

[AussieDave]

76. Not wrong at all - a defined deity or a buff holy being

can't be all bad.........:evilgrin:

[DanCa]

77. Why did I expect him to look alot more like Hulk Hogan? (nt)

[AussieDave]

78. No - that would just scare the children and frighten the horses

plus he'd have to get robes in extra large size......:)

[DanCa]

79. Red and yellow robes at that/

I figured out where I got the visual. My neice goes to a christian school and on her coloring books the have jesus looking alot like the Hulkster.

[smitty]

80. Ideal tag team match:

Jesus and Buddha vs. Mohammad and Moses

Wait a second, is that blasphemous? Maybe tennis doubles would be better.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

82. Whoa! Who Knew???

We had a big picture in my church of a very attractive Christ and it always made me feel...funny.

[DinahMoeHum]

84. The skin is too pale for my taste, but to each his/her own, I guess.

I always pictured Jesus as a swarthy, rough-hewn weather-beaten sort of fellow, because he started out in a blue-collar profession (carpenter) and the hot, dry air and wind of the Middle East will do a number on a guy's skin pretty quick.

That's my take, anyway.

:shrug:

[Bucky]

86. I'm more offended by the bondage imagery

Tie me up, Lord; Tie me down.

[Alleycat]

88. Well that one way to convert teenage girls

or in my case more mature women!