One of my sisters has lung cancer - another is going to Iraq

[skygazer]

I'm sorta reeling here.

I have a sister who works for the State Department - she called me last night to let me know that our oldest sister has just been diagnosed with lung cancer and she herself has been ordered to Iraq for a couple of months. Wow.

Our sister has already got many health issues - she's essentially an invalid. She's 58 years old, diabetic, has 2 crushed disks in her back that she's had surgery on which only made things worse. This makes it almost impossible for her to exercise so she's overweight which doesn't help the diabetes. She's also suffered for many years from crippling depression and she's alone. My siblings who still live in the area (Vermont) do what they can to help her, bringing her shopping and on outings, having her over for dinner, taking her to her doctor's appointments but at the end of the day, she is alone with her cat and I feel just awful for her. :cry: Especially since we had a blowout a few months ago and haven't spoken since. I will be calling her this weekend - it will be hard.

My other sister is rather ambivalent about the Iraq assignment. On the one hand, she does not agree with out being there or our policies, on the other hand, it is her job and she feels that since we are there, if she can do something positive it's better than doing nothing. She's somewhat apprehensive, of course, while at the same time a little excited. After this assignment, she's giving up her position in the Foreign Service and moving to the Civil Service because she just wants to stay put for a while. She's been all over the world and while she's enjoyed it, she's ready to have some stability in her life.

I'm sorry, I'm rambling. My brain is sort of on overload.

[deadparrot]

1. Oh, skygazer...

I'm so sorry. :hug:

Sending good thoughts, prayers, and vibes your way. Best of luck to your whole family, especially your sisters. Keep us posted.

[Swede]

2. Tough times for you and yours skygazer.

Good luck and best wishes.

[salin]

3. Wow... what heavy, heavy news...

:hug:

[skygazer]

4. That's exactly it

Kind of a double whammy. I was okay when I was on the phone with her. Got off and told my SO the news and was sort of bummed but about an hour later, I suddenly burst into tears and couldn't stop crying. It just hit me like a shot to the gut.

Thanks for the hugs. They're needed...

[salin]

Wishing you strength

esp for the call with your estranged sister. Any post blow-up communication can be hard... and this one will be emotionally draining on a number of possible levels (given your description). Power through the call - while it may be hard, I bet by the time the call is over while you may feel drained, you will also feel a tiny bit of peace (just knowing that communication is open again alone should help a little.) More hugs sent your way.

[Hugin]

5. Tragic story skygazer.

As always you have my support and sympathy.

:hug:

[nothingshocksmeanymore]

6. I would be on overlaod too with that news

Glad you are calling her - I wish you the best

[In_The_Wind]

7. I'm so sorry, skygazer.

[ScreamingMeemie]

8. skygazer,

You'll be thought of...often. I am sorry that words will not change things or make much difference. Know that I care. :hug:

[skygazer]

9. Oh, but they do make a difference

Knowing that my DU friends are here is really a huge help. It makes me know I'm not alone and that people care. Thanks, my friend. :hug:

[Call Me Wesley]

10. Lighting a candle for you and yours, skygazer.

Good vibes flowing. :hug:

[skygazer]

11. Thanks, CMW

I love DU. :hug:

[Shine]

12. OMG, honey, I'm so sorry!

:hug: Wow, I can certainly understand why you're reeling. Talk about a double whammy...Whew, that's rough news to get all at once.

I will light a candle on my altar this morning for you and your sisters. I hope your conversation with the sister who has lung cancer goes smoothly and provides you both with some measure of emotional healing.

:hug: :loveya: Please know you've got a lot of support available to you here at DU. Feel free to PM me or call whenever you wanna talk or just to unload, OK? :hug: :loveya:

[skygazer]

15. Thank you, Shine

I gain so much strength from this place - it's such a community. :hug:

It may be a little awkward initially calling her but I know it will be okay. Family is family and we all have our ups and downs. Ultimately, though, it's just "stuff" and deep down, we know we love each other and are there for each other.

Thanks for your support and friendship. It means so much. :loveya: :hug:

[applegrove]

13. Very sad.

[miss_american_pie]

14. I'm so sorry

That is a lot to process at once. :hug:

[AirmensMom]

16. Oh, skygazer, I'm so sorry.

:cry: :hug: Ramble all you want. We're here to listen and cry with you. That's a lot to handle all at once, after all.

You'll probably feel better after you call ... and so will she. She's not alone if she has you and her other sibs. I wish the best for all of you ... hope for recovery for the one with cancer, safety for the one who's going to Iraq, and comfort for you and the rest of your sibs.

:grouphug:

[riona]

17. It's a wonder you are on overload

such news is a bit much to handle all at once.