I am so happy ! I am going home for the first time since March 2001

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

I want to share something :

After nearly 3 years in Germany I am returning home . I should feel happy but at the same time I am sad . I have grown up here ( mentally I have grown up ). I posted a couple of weeks ago about finding a flight and etc . Well I found one - on Sunday I will be heading home to American soil for the first time since March 2001 . The world and the country (USA) has changed so much that time and so have I - how much would I have to bite my tongue against the repugs ? .I am not sure how I am going to handle all the Freepers on a daily basis . I am surely going to miss the real news that I get here in Germany compared to FOX and Co .

I have been doing some packing already and I came across some songwritings of mine that I started in the beginning of 2001 and I see how much I have grown mentally . Every song was about me against the world and typical ramblings of a 20 year old and I no longer think that way anymore ... I am only 23 now by the way - but coming over here has opened my eyes up in a way that I have never imagined . I think everyone should live in a foreign country if they have the change because sometimes you have to get out of the picture to see the " true " picture .

I ran away from the States because I was going through depression after a rough time at college . I was really thinking about suicide or leaving the States in 2001 ( I needed somewhere to think out my life basically ) ... I am of course going to miss my boyfriend of 4 years - we had our fights ( i bled and so did he ) but I have to come home now . But now I feel so much stronger now and I feel that " its time for me to come home ". ( I am talking opportunity wise) I finally have the strength to register for college again . I fought off panic attacks on my own . I am no longer depressed and I am so happy for that . I am so proud that I can stand in public without running away ! Yay is me ! And I know know now that things happy for a reason in life ... if never became depressed I would not have learned the things that I know now .

This sounds sappy but I really look forward to posting more on the DU during 2004 . I don't post as much now ( just in Lounge of course )in the GD because I really am a quiet person and I am not as wity as everyone else . Before I found the DU , I thought I was alone in my Bush Bashing . I thought I was the only one who could read between the lines . Everyone here is great and I pray that each of you find the strength to do whatever you can to get Bush out of office in 2004 - I am EXTREMELY looking forward to volunteering at the campaign headquarters in my area of NC .

And if I am not online to say it : Season's Greetings to everyone !

[Philostopher]

1. Good luck and best to you, CP!

I didn't leave the country at the age you were, but went through a similar process -- I got married, he went in the Air Force, we ended up in the desert Southwest for two years (which was more like another planet, in many ways, than simply another state from the Midwest I'd grown up in). I think it's good to spend a couple of years away from 'home' too -- someplace different, even if it's not another country entirely. It does, indeed, give one perspective on one's past.

The strength you gain from those things -- and the perspective -- are things that can never be taken away from you, no matter what else you have or lose later.

Hope things go well for you after you get back!

[GOPisEvil]

2. I hope you have a good trip!

If I'm ever in NC, I'll say :hi:

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

3. Thanks to the both of you :)

[cally]

4. I've been thinking about you

and hoping you made it home. Please post when you get back.

[K8-EEE]

Welcome Home!

Freedom is still hanging on, but barely!! All rides on the election. If GWB wins again, then we will have a very very difficult fight against his particular breed of corporate fascism and the permanent wars and the rich getting richer and richer.

[K8-EEE]

5. Welcome Home!

Freedom is still hanging on, but barely!! All rides on the election. If GWB wins again, then we will have a very very difficult fight against his particular breed of corporate fascism and the permanent wars and the rich getting richer and richer.