Worst Weekend Ever (an ultimate catharsis...hopefully)

[ZombieNixon]

Following are the details comprising the worst weekend of my life. I realize this is getting old, but I have to get this out somewhere and I don't have a shrink.

Here we go:

***

Friday night - Find out girlfriend is cheating on you with douchebag ex-boyfriend who already hurt her once. Can't sleep.

Saturday - Wake up at 7 AM after about two hours of sleep (cumulatively). Not wanting to get up and face the day, lay in bed until 2 PM, skipping two meals. Get up. Shower, do not comb hair. Eat. Realize philosophy paper on the nature of love is due the coming Wednesday. Despair. Eat. Exchange strong words with (now ex-) girlfriend. Tell her to go back to her ex- (now current? new?) boyfriend and never speak to you again. Say things like "don't come crawling back to me when he leaves you with a pile of debt and kids because I don't care anymore." Appropriately, feel like dick. Wonder how on earth she finds him attractive because he looks like a complete loser. Remember how much trouble you have getting girls and realize you shouldn't be talking. Continue feeling like dick. Can't sleep. Realize that ex-girlfriend's expensive purse is still under bed. Dig it out, try to open it. Can't work clasp in the dark; it's worse than a bra and made of brass or something. Feel more inadequate than before. Stick purse back under bed while mentally adding it to list of things to soak in vodka and burn with next round of peeps. Realize that could land ass in load of trouble. Die a little inside. Feel like puking. Can't sleep. Finally sleep.

Sunday - Receive message from ex-girlfriend seemingly wanting to get back into your good graces, using terms like "don't know what I want" and "feeling pressured." Says she's trying to make things work with douchebag, even though she knows they won't. Wonder incredulously. Feel twinge in stomach...could it be...forgiveness? Ye Gods, hope not.

***

[Midlodemocrat]

1. Sweetie. She doesn't deserve you.

:hug:

[barb162]

21. ditto bigtime!

[Skittles]

131. I WANT TO KICK HER ASS

YES INDEED

[ThomCat]

2. If you choose to forgiver her

please do it because you want to, not because she's trying to convince you to.

I hope you don't take her personal problems as a reflextion of yourself. Her cheating on you was her problem. It does not say anything about you or your value as a boyfriend.

:hug:

[flvegan]

3. Sorry to hear all that.

This'll sound pretty empty and lame right now, but better to have found out NOW that she's an unloyal, dishonest cheater, not deserving of you nor your trust, than the find out later when you're more involved (living together, married, etc). Move on, dude.

I know, I know...easier said than done. But, you're a good guy and you deserve someone that compliments that, not takes away from it.

[Haole Girl]

4. I'm no shrink, but your girlfriend sounds a little unsure of

who she is right now. Maybe it's not a good time for either of you to be in a relationship until you uncover your true identities. Ugh, did that sound preachy? Sorry if it did. I'm in my 40's now, and looking back at my 20's I wonder why I didn't just enjoy them more with friends instead of feeling like I had to date all the time. Wouldn't want you to make the same mistake, that's all.

I hope that is not bad advice.

[rockymountaindem]

Did you beat that guy up yet?

I don't see how you could go wrong with that. Perhaps a duel?

[ScreamingMeemie]

6. A duel...

:rofl: Funny you would say that. I was just watching an old episode of ER where two of the doctors got into a fencing match over a girl. :rofl:

[rockymountaindem]

8. Well, with such dapper trousers as that

I don't see how the ladies could resist them! I think they're both winners without a shot being fired.

Seriously, thank God we don't dress like that anymore. I'd dissolve into a puddle of sweat in less than an hour.

[ZombieNixon]

14. That'll have to wait until June

when I go back for summer break. :grr:

[ScreamingMeemie]

5. Monday-Wake up at a decent hour. Eat. Realize whole life is stretching

out in front of self. Feed Peeps to stomach which is a far better ending than anything previously planned. Get Dressed. Run down to corner store, laundromat, library, local lib meeting and notice beautiful, intense, ***single*** next girlfriend for the first time...even though she's probably been there for weeks.


***At least, that is my wish for you darling. I know it's easy for me to tell you not to kill yourself over this... So I won't. But...imagine if you were the one she left with the kids and the debt after 10 years.


:hug: You are worth far more than the likes of her. That twinge? That's acid indigestion from not taking care of yourself. :hug:

[ZombieNixon]

16. Well, regardless, I'll have to be up a decent hour.

Philosophy class...perhaps I'll ask the professor if a curmudgeonly view would be appropriate for my "nature of love" paper. :shrug:

[miss_american_pie]

7. Sweets, refusing to forgive her

is only going to hurt you.

At some point you need to let go of that negativity or you'll keep yourself closed off from the next incredible, single, knows what she wants woman you meet.

:hug:

[DS1]

11. Yeah

and let her walk all over him from that point on. That's a plan

[miss_american_pie]

12. I didn't say anything about her.

But I assure you women can sense men who are still hanging onto their exes.

[MiniMandaRuth]

9. Do NOT forgive the girlfriend.

I know I'm young.

I know that this kind of stuff really hasn't happened to me yet.

But....

Do not get back with someone who has hurt you before. She OBVIOUSLY doesn't appreciate you for the kind person you are. If she thinks that saying those things will make you forgive her... Just think what she'll do next time.

Hope that everything turns out good for you.

[Wapsie B]

10. Hmmm...........douchebag ex-boyfriend who already hurt her once

Man o man, if I had a buck for everytime I've heard that. I've been there too many times myself. DO NOT give her another chance. MOVE ON. She's nothing but heartache. It might be impossible to believe this right now but you're way outta her league. She sees a chance to try and have it both ways, just like when a guy thinks with his zipper. I had a gf who said she loved me deeply, then proceeded to boink her ex-con bf; not making any time for me but seeing this guy constantly,even planning to go on cross-country business trips with him. Like a schmuck I went back to her after I thought she was through with the guy. But she still seemed cold and distant to me for some reason. Unbeknownst to me it turns out she was crawling back to him. I hung on for a long time but whatever feeling I had for her was totally gone. Funny thing is that after I ended it I started to feel better about things. It wasn't overnight but it's been getting a lot better.

The best advice I can give you is to not hang on at all. In the long run you'll feel better about yourself. All women like this do is drain your self-esteem. Cut off all contact with her. For good. Remember the best revenge is living well.

[kedrys]

13. Forgive her? Only if you don't take her back

I know it sounds contradictory, but if you forgive her, you'll feel better (no burning pit in stomach, or at least the fire will wane over time). She doesn't deserve you, and you shouldn't take her back. There's a much nicer someone with you in mind wandering around out there looking for you - find her and be happy!

[Haole Girl]

15. Just curious- why couldn't he forgive her but not take her back?

[kedrys]

17. ?

Rereading my post, I could've phrased that better:

1. Forgive her

AND

2. Don't take her back.

If forced to choose between 1 and 2, sanity and self-preservation mandate choice #2.

[Haole Girl]

20. I see, I think. But, it never helped my sanity to harbor ill feelings.

But each person is an individual. I don't mean to argue with you, I really don't.

[kedrys]

23. I agree with you

It took me 2 years to forgive someone who had wronged me horribly (in a professional setting, but still). It happened in a dream (of all places), and I've felt much better since.

Given the chance to see this person again, I'd tell them I forgave them, but I still wouldn't hang out with them or (Bog forbid) EVER be in the same workplace again.

[amitten]

18. Drop that one like a hot potato. It won't change for the better.

And in the meantime, you'll be suffering non-stop. A quick, clean cut heals the fastest.

[ZombieNixon]

19. As far as I'm concerned, our association is over.

It's just hard to let go after eight years of friendship. :(

[amitten]

22. Understood. Maybe friendship is the best option.

Some friends aren't really meant to be lovers.

[Haole Girl]

24. You feeling better now? Anybody hear from Blue_Roses?

You'd think I've been around here for years. I never even "met" any of you until yesterday and I feel like I've known you forever! I wish I could post here all day, but the errands are calling.

Take care and...

[LynzM]

25. Mama said there'd be days like this....

There'd be days like this, my mama said.

I've had those weekends, dude, and I'm sorry for how shitty it feels and how much you are hurting. Posters up-thread are right, though. She doesn't deserve you if she's going to pull shit like that and try to string you along. :hug:

[deadparrot]

26. You can forgive without forgetting.

Believe me, when I look at my roommate and think about where she'll be in ten years if she stays with this guy, I just feel bad.

Granted, it's not the same situation. She's my friend; not a SO. But when I think of everything I want to do with my life, I'm so, so thankful that it's not me being tied down by that douchebag.

Best of luck, ZN. Hope you're feeling better soon. :hi:

[ZombieNixon]

28. It's strange. Yesterday, when I though about where my ex will be in ten

years with this guy, I felt sad for her.

Today, when I think about it, I just don't care. Bad things will happen, and she's got it coming. Meh. :shrug:

[tjwmason]

27. Are you asking for advice or support?

If the latter - you're a wonderful guy, and she clearly didn't fully realise what she was missing out on - you deserve one of the very best women around. :hug: :yourock:

If the former, forgive her - easier said than done, I know, but simply by deciding that you want to forgive her you're taking a massive step towards it, full forgiveness will follow in time. Then tell her calmly that you're not getting back together - she herself has said she doesn't know what she wants - fine she should take some time to decide what she wants, but she shouldn't mess up other folk in the meantime.

It's not easy - there's no pretending otherwise, but as you have discovered you can rant in the Lounge and folk will be there to (try and) cheer you up. :hug:

[ZombieNixon]

29. I'll take whatever I can get.

Thanks. :pals:

[tjwmason]

30. I know it sounds corny

but things will start to feel better. :hug: :yourock:

[ZombieNixon]

31. I think they are.

I've moved from anger to sadness back to anger and now on to indifference.

She's still trying to talk to me, though. x(

[tjwmason]

32. If I were you

I'd avoid talking to her for a while at least - tell her that you need to get your head clear before talking to her.

[ZombieNixon]

34. She was going to come visit me next weekend.

I sure hope she doesn't think that's still on. :grr:

If there's only one reason to talk to her it's to make sure we're clear on that.

[LaurenG]

33. Zombie, I am so very sorry

Heartbreak happens to every single one of us. It is mortifyingly painful but it gets easier. I think that when you have known someone for as long as you've known this young lady it makes it a bit hard to let go. I want you to take a deep breath and just imagine letting go. If you fight the pain or try to deny it it only gets worse. Just allow yourself to feel the pain, it is not as tough as trying to avoid feeling it. I hope that makes sense to you.


I have had the same situation but I was married and I kept forgiving and it kept happening. If you think that this is a lesson you need to learn first hand by all means pursue her. If you would rather go on to greener pastures just realize that this will get easier. In the meantime take a bath and take a walk and just figure out a way to nurture you. You have had a heartbreak and it's just as real as a physical ache. Take the necessary steps to heal. Tomorrow do what Mrs. Grumpy has suggested. Just remember you have a group of people who are pulling for you and we will be here for you.

OB :hug:

[ZombieNixon]

35. Before this time, I had a rule about relationships.

One try is enough. I went after her once, it didn't work because she was still hurting (from the same guy she's presumably back with now...sorry, that just boggles my mind how someone would do that)...then later we officially got together when she thought she'd pulled through that.

Now, I'm going back to, and sticking with my once is enough rule. :shrug:

[NewJeffCT]

36. well, as somebody who got divorced maybe 7 years back...

The first thing I did was to go out & have fun with the opposite sex... be it through just chatting over coffee, going to a movie, or (gasp) getting a lap dance. Yes, I did spend a bit too much on that last sort of fun back then.

But, I was kind of bitter with women in general at the time because my ex wasn't exactly nice to me leading up to her filing for divorce (she asked me if I was going to counter-sue her for mental abuse!) and just getting out & meeting women in different situations made me realize that I was wrong for being bitter with women in general.

[ZombieNixon]

39. Would that I could find another woman who'd be willin to chat with me over

coffee or go to a movie with me. :eyes:

I'm not bitter with women in general; you can't generalize an entire group from one bad experience, but I'm almost ready to give up and become a monk at this point. :(

[NewJeffCT]

41. I think you'd be surprised

it may not seem like there are any women out there... but, just don't put pressure on yourself to find one. Just state to yourself, up front, that you're just looking to have fun and it's not a big deal if it doesn't work out.

I hardly dated in my teens & 20s and was despondent at my lack of dates. Finally, after getting divorced, I figured out that the secret was to not put pressure on yourself to find a girlfriend or to "score" or even to get a 2nd date with the woman. That sort of thing just takes care of itself. Just be yourself and see how it works.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

37. It may not help to say this right now, but you WILL get over it. Trust me.

It hurts like bloody hell, and you think your life will suck forever, but it won't. I say this as an old person who has been kicked in the head, so to speak, in this way at the ages of 18, 21, 33, 37, and 45 (not to mention a number of other less painful but nonetheless disheartening episodes). You figure out that SOs are like buses -- wait around for awhile and eventually another one will come by.

And now some practical advice. Get really drunk, yell, throw away, or at least hide, everything that reminds you of her. Do not under any circumstances call her or contact her. Then find activities that keep you really busy. After awhile you'll notice that you don't really care all that much any more.

Although I do admit that I still read the obit column regularly to see if the guy who brutally dumped me in 1986 is dead yet.

[ZombieNixon]

40. My potential SOs are like those buses that come along every two years

and they're always full. :(

[catmandu57]

38. Forgiving is easy forgetting can be a bitch

Actually sometimes forgiving doesn't come easy either, it took 25 years for me to really feel forgiveness and mean it after what an ex did when we were both young and stupid.
It's okay to be mad right now, you don't need to be in a hurry to forgive, fuck the slut, she made her bed let her lay in it.
You can't see it right now, but you've just been given a wonderful opportunity, a chance to start clean, feel bad for a while, then heave a great sigh of relief and start again.
Don't worry about women or relationships, they come to you when you least expect them.

[ZombieNixon]

42. I can forget easily enough.

Or, rather, I can fake it; as far as the rest of the world is concerned, it never happened if they ask me.

Forgiving...well, this was such a huge betrayal of trust that I'm not sure I really can...or if I even want to. :shrug:

[Robb]

43. RUN.

Believe me on this.

[ZombieNixon]

44. Uhh...why?

:shrug:

I'm trying my damndest to cutoff all association with her.

Truth me told, it's a bit difficult because we have a lot of mutual friends. :(

[Robb]

46. It took me years and years and years and years

...and years, notably, to realize an important truth:

There are actually people out there without all the drama. Normal, sane, considerate people, not unlike myself.

People who treat others with respect. Who are fun to be with, not just most of the time, but all the time.

Believe it.

[ZombieNixon]

48. Where the hell are they?

:grr:

And why don't I know them? :(

[Robb]

51. Ever notice

...you can't find your keys when you look really, really hard for them? But if you're not really looking for them, they turn up?

Love's like that. Come to terms with not needing to find your keys. ;)

[crispini]

45. Sheesh.

:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:

Sometimes you're the windshield, sometimes you're the bug. Sux though doesn't it?

I agree with the posters that are telling you to just find some girls to go out and hang with and have fun without looking to get into a "relationship." Why not try Craigslist? I've had a ton of luck there. Online dating can be OK, everybody's doing it nowadays. :D

[ZombieNixon]

47. Historically, I've been the bug.

:(

I've heard weird things about Craigslist. I don't think I'm ready to try online dating yet. :shrug: I'd rather have met the person first. Just me, I guess.

[crispini]

50. Heh, well you do meet them after a couple of emails,

at least I do. I'm not one for lengthy correspondences with phantom people--- there is so much you get in the way of nonverbal communication when you actually physically meet someone.

Anyway, good luck sugar. This too shall pass.....

[LeftyMom]

49. I'm sorry.

At least your misery isn't your own fault. She has to live with knowing that she fucked up and hurt you. That can't be very fun, either.

:hug:

[ZombieNixon]

52. She doesn't seem to care.

Still trying to pull off her version of "making things right." Whatever that means. :shrug:

:hug:

[LeftyMom]

53. Eek.

That doesn't sound so good. :(

[ZombieNixon]

54. No, it doesn't.

Though two days ago I'd have fallen for it hook, line, and sinker. Now, I hope I know better. I'm just going to have problems trusting again, I know that. :(

[July]

80. First, I'm sorry you've been having a crappy weekend.

Second, in my experience "making things right" means "maintaining my residence in your head." It's not about making YOUR life better, it's about feeding her ego and gaining justification through your forgiveness. Sorry to be so cynical, but I've seen this kind of dance not only between lovers but also between friends and between relatives, and (IMO) you are best off taking her needs out of the picture. It will help you gain some distance and decide what you really want or don't want where she's concerned. With the information you give us, it appears she wants to manipulate you while she dithers, and she wants you to take responsibility for it by granting her forgiveness, taking her back, or finding some other way to feel okay about what SHE has done.

Take a break and do something you like. Eat ice cream for breakfast lunch and dinner, rent movies that make you laugh, go look at something beautiful, do a crossword, blast some tunes, or whatever works for you.

Good luck.

[ZombieNixon]

81. That's exactly how I feel.

I'm ignoring her. She's just trying really hard.

Blasting tunes and downing beer after beer. That's what I'm doing right now. :beer:

[jukes]

55. zn

DON'T! (you prbly will though)

she will kick you in the nuts again. (you won't listen) i've done the same thing, and believe me (but you won't) she'll either bounce back to you 1ce he's eft her over, like she did you, then cheat on you w/ him again or you'll constantly suspect her, y you'll prbly be right, so you'll fight all the time y it will go on y on....

or she'll use you as a revenge-fuck someX when she's mad at him, y you'll feel sick all over again wanting her back.

or you'll end up in some crazy 3-way that'll end up violent....

(but you've already quit listening...)

[ZombieNixon]

56. No, I'm listening.

I'm pretty sure I never want to see her again. I'm very forgiving, except when someone betrays my trust...and when it's as huge as this...then, well...never again.

She's still trying to talk to me. For the most part, I'm ignoring her. :shrug: Hopefully she'll just go away. Part of me doesn't want that, but I'm trying to beat that part into submission.

[jukes]

63. you're smarter than me, then

& you'll save yourself a ton of "fed-up".

go find some mousey little bird, be nice to her, make her day & forget this trainwreck. you'll feel much better about yourself.



hope you have a better night than the past several...

[jpgray]

57. My advice: Forgive her and don't sleep with her

Half of that you're doing already, right? :patriot:

[ZombieNixon]

58. True...

Not sure I can forgive her, though...not even sure want to. :shrug:

[jpgray]

59. Forgiveness is a really powerful thing

If you hold a grudge, to a certain extent the person you hold it against controls your behavior. And working to maintain a negative feeling towards someone is rarely a healthy or enjoyable experience. Don't get back together with her though, if you can help it.

[ZombieNixon]

60. Well, she apologized,

but to me that's just a bullshit move because I know she's just going to keep going with him.

I don't understand why people beg for forgiveness just before they do it again. :shrug:

[jpgray]

64. If you know she's going to keep going with him

No sense holding a grudge, since you're not going to change her--you'll just make yourself feel miserable. Best to forgive and move on, in my view.

[JVS]

69. No, sleep with and marry her, but keep a massive grudge going.

Use the cheating incident as a trump card to win arguments/ get away with stuff.

[mdmc]

61. that is a shitty weekend.

And I do not think that you are going to be able to complete a philosophy paper based on the concept of love by Wednesday.

Is there a way that we can help with the paper?

I wrote a story about me weekend, let me find it and post.

Peace and low stress. Remember, this too shall pass. I don't know you from Adam, but I know that your a cool dude and that there is some other chick out there for you, or that your ex will beg you to get back together. Whatever. Things are going to work out for you bro.

Let me go look for my supercool weekend story. It might cheer ya up.

[ZombieNixon]

62. I'll get it done, somehow.

I've pulled off worse and gotten good grades.

One thing's for sure, is that this paper will be decidedly pessimistic in tone. I just hope the professor will accept it from a more modern perspective that is less openly Platonic than some of the others might be. If I can talk about societal requirements, then I should be able to get a decent piece out it. It won't be an uplifting one, I do know that. :(

[mdmc]

65. there has to be a better way (this was my weekend)

I wanted to post a cyber-welcome back to MeganMonkey. MeganMonkey was offline for a couple days while she attended the Manhattan war protest. I wanted to post a welcome back thread for her and a short summary of my time with her in the big apple.

MeganMonkey informed me that she was heading to NYC, and we were able to make partial plans to meet sometime before the Saturday protest. We exchanged emails and mobile phone numbers.

On Wednesday, I called MeganMonkey and offered to pick her up at the airport the next day. She telephoned me and informed me that she was coming in on Friday. I agreed to pick her up at the airport.

On Friday, I drove down to pick up MeganMonkey. I passed three airports (Stewart, Newark, and J.F.K.) before making it to LaGuardia Airport.

Although I had never met or even seen MeganMonkey, we were able to locate each other with almost no problem at all. We were quickly on our way off of Long Island and into the Big Apple.

I am not a city slicker. The city is a huge mystery to me, and I am often overwhelmed by it. I almost always go to the city with some urbanite that knows their way around. Today I was that urbanite.

While I tried to navigate the streets of Gotham, Meganmonkey and I talked politics, music, and life. I was glad that we were able to communicate so easily, because it helped hide the awful driving job I was doing getting us around Manhattan. Luckily, all the other drivers were so bat-shit insane, that my hesitation and lack of familiarity with our surroundings was pretty much a non issue.

Eventually, the roads started “to make sense”. There was 57th Street; the next road was 56th Street, and so on. We found Meganmokey’s hotel without too much trouble.

I dropped Meganmonkey off and went to park my car. I found a local garage, parked, and returned to the hotel. Meganmonkey met me in the lobby and we went out to explore midtown.

We walked towards Central Park, and checked out Park Ave and 5th Ave. When we found Central Park, we decided to walk around explore for a while. We stopped at the pond and grabbed a couple of beers. We drank our beer and looked out across the pond as the sun set over the west side. Central Park always reminds me of the movies.

After a while we decided to go get something to eat. We walked back towards the east side, and stopped at a pub for another drink. While at the pub, there were two other couples, two sets of guys, sitting on either side of us. The guys had been drinking for a while, and were loudly talking about politics. The guys to the left of us were discussing Valerie Plame. The guys to the right of us were discussing the illegal wire tap program. Both Meganmonkey and I attend events / protests to “charge our batteries”, and the patrons of this pub helped to psyche us up. We decided to eat at the pub, and went into their back room to dine.

After dinner, we returned to the hotel. We smoked and talked for a long time before I left to return to the Hudson Valley. I planned to take the “peace train” from Poughkeepsie down to Grand Central Station for the protest. There was no way that I was going to drive down to the city during a war protest. That would be insanity!

I got home around 1:00 AM. I needed to be at the train station at 8:55 AM the next morning.

I ended up missing the train. Meganmonkey telephoned me, and I informed her that I had missed the train, and that I was going to try to drive down to the protest.

I was on the thruway (I-87) when I realized that I didn’t have the location of the protest march. No biggie, I thought. I knew that it was on Broadway, and that the protest started in the north, and proceeded south. I could find it.

I decided to call Meganmonkey when I got on to the Palisade Parkway, the last road that I would take before reaching Manhattan. I didn’t have my phone! I stopped at the first service station and checked my car. My phone wasn’t with me.

I now had a choice. I could head down to the city, find the protest, and then find Meganmonkey at the protest. I actually thought that karma would ensure that I found her. I was pretty certain that we would run into each other.

Better safe then sorry, I thought. I decided to return home and pick up my phone. It would be a 65 mile round trip from where I was. It had to be done.

When I got back to Newburgh (that is where I live), I found my phone and called Meganmonkey. I told her that I had got tied up, and that I was running late. Meganmonkey was still marching in the parade at this time. I told her I was on my way back down.

While I was at home, my roommate / landlord came home. He has a 3000.00 dollar electricity bill that has resulted in our house being without electricity for over ten days now. He told me that his girlfriend was loaning him the money to pay the bill, and that our power would be on some time next week. This was good news.

I called Meganmonkey from the Palisades Parkway, the George Washington Bridge, and from Midtown. She informed me that she was hangin at the after party that was way downtown in the village, and I started making my way south.

I met back up with Meganmonkey as she was walking north with some of the protest foot traffic. We went back to the hotel and hung out for a little while. We had a drink in the top floor bar at the hotel and watched the sun set over the west side. After our drink, we decided to go out and get something to eat and to take in the city.

We went to eat at a diner, and then walked around the city. We got to see many cool shops (Tiffany’s, Prada, Channel, Armani, and Ghurka) and interesting sites. We heard many different languages (Dutch, French, Spanish, Yiddish, Russian (?), Chinese, and Japanese). We went to Times Square, Rockefeller Center, and up and down 52nd Street. We saw the MTV and NBC studios. We walked the theatre district. We got to look in to the Hershey store (as a chocolate addict, this is my Mecca) and see many more interesting people, including Spiderman. We also stopped and got ice cream.

We returned to the hotel and smoked a little more while watching the late night news. As I left to return to the Hudson Valley, we promised that we would try to hang out again in the future. “There will be other war protests,” I said, “Perhaps other wars.” I am sure that we will meet again.

I hope that I do get to hang out with Meganmonkey again. Next time, perhaps, it will be in Washington DC, perhaps to celebrate the Dems taking the Senate and the House. Perhaps we will get to meet during an impeachment celebration. Perhaps it will be in 2009 when a new leader will be elected to represent us.

I hope that the next time that we meet it is not in protest, but in celebration. I know however, that if there is a need to peacefully assemble to address grievances with our leadership in the future, that there will be plenty of people like meganmonkey out in the streets, and that they are real cool people to spend time with. My batteries are charged, and I feel great! Welcome back, MEGANMONKEY!

[Haole Girl]

75. Sounds like you had a nice time. I had to laugh, though,

at the part where you realized you forgot your cell phone, because I was thinking just before I read that part how lucky you were to be in a day and age where you have a cell phone! Except for the smoking part (and losing each other), it sounds like a nice visit. But, if both of you smoke, I guess that part was nice for the 2 of you also. Thanks for the post.

[mdmc]

77. i felt like i've know her my whole life. we love the same things

perhaps that could be your philosophy paper.

She smoke cigarettes.:shrug:;)

[mdmc]

79. welcome to DU kc2!

[Haole Girl]

82. Thank you.

[mdmc]

83. hang in there

peace!

[KitchenWitch]

66. I am so sorry ZN

You will feel better eventually....and BACK. AWAY. FROM. THE. PURSE. Don't do it, you will feel more like dick if you do.

[JVS]

68. If he does what?

[KitchenWitch]

70. He has her purse.

[JVS]

71. yeah, are you saying not to destroy it, or not to snoop through it...

for more incriminating evidence?

[KitchenWitch]

72. Both

[JVS]

73. I would "forget" I have it and then pawn it someday for beer money.

And I'd snoop, because that's just how I roll

[JVS]

67. She has no right to want to be your friend. Tell her to fuck off!

[ZombieNixon]

74. That's about how I feel.

I think I'm just too nice to say it. I'm kind of hoping she tries to talk to me tonight when I'm blasted drunk, so I can give her an earful and not feel so bad about it. :grr:

[JVS]

76. Don't let her talk to you at all. Especially not when drunk

Drunkeness is when mistakes are made and the mental defences are down.

[ZombieNixon]

78. She's tried to talk to me twice today already.

I gave her a terse one-line response and ignored her otherwise. :shrug:

[Generic Brad]

84. You may not believe this now...

but the hurt you are feeling will heal. Many of us have gone through similar heartbreak that feels overwhelming and crippling. But it does pass. The pain eventually dulls. Then eventually a day will go by where you don't even think of her. Hell, one day you will find yourself happier than you ever were with her. It doesn't feel like that now, but it will.

Very few of us go through life without getting betrayed in some fashion. You are not alone. Most of us older farts have been there (some more than others). It will get better. You will not be alone forever. You will find happiness and love again. Just hang in there.

[ZombieNixon]

85. Fuck her. She gets what she deserves.

It's not going to be good, and maybe I'm evil for thinking it, but it makes me glad now.

:beer:

[Generic Brad]

86. If it's any consolation

I once had a girlfriend cheat on me, so I dumped her. About twenty years later I had a chance meeting with her and could not get over how enormous her ass had become. Hold that image in your mind if it helps get you through the night.

[ZombieNixon]

87. Hahaha!!

:D :thumbsup:

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

88. Ahahahahahahaha !

I am howling in laughter over here now LOL .

[sendero]

89. Whatever you do..

... please heed my sage advice. Don't look back. Women (and men) who act like this never stop. If she didn't care enough about your relationship to avoid spreading for an ex, she will never care enough about it.

Write it off. Sure this sucks, but what would be worse is going through this 2 or 3 times, which is what will happen if you buy her "I'm confused" bullshit.

[ZombieNixon]

90. Insofar as I'm concerned, she no longer exists.

:shrug:

[Thtwudbeme]

91. lose the dipshit, Zombie

I don't know how old you all are...but, I am telling you...I don't need to know much more than to know that this woman is going to cause nothing but problems for me.

Women like her thrive on this shit...and they continue their silly assed melodramatic horseshit right up into their forties when they realize they are really, really really losing their looks and there isn't a fucking thing a plastic surgeon can do to help them.

Get over her NOW.

Immediately. And get that damned purse outta your house, it's bad juju.

btw--if you want to see what I am talking about IN ACTION...go to the local watering hole pick up joint, and look at the women in their forties trying to pick up men. It SHOULD scare the fuck out of you.

Get a new girlfriend, they are a dime a dozen. And wait until you meet a decent one to take home to your mama before you get carried away with angst.

[ZombieNixon]

92. I think (hope) I'm getting over her now.

I just don't know what to do with that damn purse now. :grr: :shrug:

[Thtwudbeme]

93. You call her and say come over here and get your purse

at 3:00PM.

And then put it beside your door in the hall at 2:59PM. With a note on it:
"goodbye and good luck"

Or "Adios tramp" if you are really feeling snippy.

[ZombieNixon]

94. Think I might just mail it to her with the "Adios, tramp" note attached.

:grr:

Dorm security's a bitch and I sure as hell aren't checking her in again.

[Thtwudbeme]

95. Well...there you go dearie.

There's your answer.

Go downstairs and give it to the dorm security dude, and tell him/her you found it. You don't have to say where.

Then call her and tell her to pick it up from security. Give her the number if she is too dumb to find it, which I am betting she is.

Take a friend with you so that you won't be accused of stealing it.

Put the "tramp" note inside. Type it, because she sounds really slow, and it might help to have bigger font.

[ZombieNixon]

96. Well, she's not stupid.

Psychotic, yes. Manipulative, yes. But stupidity is perhaps the one mental disorder she doesn't have.

That being said, making her take a 2.5 hour train trip and spend $21 on it to get a purse seems appealing to me. Especially if it means I can get rid of this damn thing without seeing her. :grr:

[Thtwudbeme]

97. She was stupid enough to lose you as a boyfriend

pretty fucking dumb in my opinion.

;)

[ZombieNixon]

98. Well, emotional stupidity is an entirely different animal

:shrug:

[JVS]

104. Hey, this ex-Girlfriend doesn't happen to go to UIUC, does she?

Because that's about 2.5 hours from Chicago

[ZombieNixon]

106. No. Not in this state.

(If you think about it, that ought to narrow it down some.)

[JVS]

108. Oh good, I was afraid that the douchebag might turn out to be me

;-)

[ZombieNixon]

110. No actually, the douchebag lives back in my hometown.

This is a disadvantage of having your summer break begin a month after those of your peers. :(

[RevolutionaryActs]

99. I'll kick both their asses if you want?

How dare they hurt my Nixie-pooh. :hug:


Uh, you don't mind if I call you 'Nixie-pooh'... do you? ;)

[ZombieNixon]

100. If you must call me Nixie-pooh, I'm fine with it.

:) If you feel comfy cooing over a bitter husk of a human being, more power to ya.

Somehow I feel I'll be kicking some douchebag ass over summer break. :grr:

:hug:

:loveya:

[RevolutionaryActs]

101. Well, I've been drinking... so just be glad it's only Nixie-pooh.

It could be worse, much worse. :P



If I may be honest for a moment. From what I know about you, you seem like a damn good guy, and she doesn't deserve you. :hug:


Only models and really hawt actresses are good enough for you. :7

[ZombieNixon]

102. I've been drinking, too.

:beer:

And I've never lusted after a model or a hawt actresses. :shrug: Too vapid.

[RevolutionaryActs]

103. Erm.

Uh.


Never? :o



Damn you! How am I suppose to make you feel better? I am NOT buying you a hooker, that's just icky.

[ZombieNixon]

105. Eew, please don't.

:puke:

No, what I want is a woman who's secure in herself and isn't too immature to accept a friend and a lover in one package. Sadly, at my age, if women like these exist, I can't find them. :(

[RevolutionaryActs]

107. I told you it was icky!!

Duh.



Dude, all I know are girls who want that. You just need to move to Washington apparently. :P

[ZombieNixon]

109. Apparently.

:shrug: :(

[RevolutionaryActs]

111. Or, you just need to look a little bit more?

Once the hurt subsides(and trust me it will, I know all about hurt), I know you'll find a really great girl, who totally deserves a really great guy. :)

[ZombieNixon]

112. One can only hope.

And alcohol helps, yes it does. :):(

[RevolutionaryActs]

113. Well things could always be worse.

You could have gotten one of her new-ex-boyfriends STDs.

[ZombieNixon]

114. Eew...thank God I wrapped up.

:scared:

[RevolutionaryActs]

115. Did that at least make you smile?

Tell me it did.. in a mean kind of way. :bounce:

[ZombieNixon]

116. A little inside.

What really makes me smile is the thought of her being left with a pile of kids to take care of in five years. Yeah, I'm vindictive. :grr: :evilgrin: <- really evil, not the usual naughty shit.

[RevolutionaryActs]

117. Well, karma is a bitch.

Another evil thought to add... once she has those kids her ass will become the size of Texas.

[ZombieNixon]

118. Yeah, that's what someone else said.

:evilgrin: :thumbsup:

Pity, really, waste of a nice ass, but still...:evilgrin:

[RevolutionaryActs]

120. I like this evil smiley:

Hotlinking is wrong, hotlinking is wrong.....



Aww fucking hell, it won't even let me upload the damn thing!!!!!

Uh.. here's the link to it?

[ZombieNixon]

122. This image link contains an illegal code

Yeah, I like that one too.

:P

[RevolutionaryActs]

125. Damn you.

It's not my fault! It's the vodkas fault. :P

[ZombieNixon]

127. Yeah, it is.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x5096525

[Writer]

119. ZombieNixon... listen up d00d...

The girl ain't all that. But I bet there's some phat lewt in that purse of hers! ;) ;) ;)

(Hey - the semester's almost over. Focus on your schoolwork THEN figure out what to do with this bitch.)

Out,

Writer.

On edit: In other words, make her wait for you. She's the one who screwed up so take your time... then... maybe... you can be her friend or something. ;)

[ZombieNixon]

121. There's nothing in the purse.

I finally managed to get it open. :(

Fuck her, she doesn't exist, as far as I'm concerned.

[Writer]

123. There you go. Herk on, brother.

You're the one with the big GPA... she's table scraps in comparison. :)

[ZombieNixon]

124. Now if only she'd quit trying to contact me.

People are so much easier to ignore that way. :grr:

[Writer]

126. Can you block her phone calls somehow?

Typically IGNORE sends the best message...

[ZombieNixon]

128. Can't block 'em.

Best I can do is ignore her, and even though I really want to take her out of my phone book, I can't because then I can't tell her phone number from my mom's and I don't want to ignore my mother. :(

[Writer]

129. That sucks.

It sounds like you guys were an item just long enough for her to have made an impression, yeah? I remember the Asshole Boyfriend from college... he was an asshole and it took me 3 1/2 years to figure it out. Frankly, this chick doesn't seem to have her head together, and you don't want to wait until she's 30 to figure out if she'll ever mature. You know, I just had a thought: why don't you grab a male friend of yours and head out? Just chill with some non-female entities for a while until the semester ends. Social support is what you need. When you develop enough mojo again, then seek out a new lady. Otherwise, drop this bitch cold and let her learn from her mistakes.

:hi:

[ZombieNixon]

130. Oh, she's dropped all right.

We were close friends for eight plus years, which makes it that much harder. But you're right, she doesn't have her head straight, as it turns out; I thought I knew her, guess not.

I just wish I had friends I could really talk to about it. My two closest friends are great guys otherwise, but useless on relationships; one won't shut up about his new girlfriend and the other would be interested to hear if my ex is on the market again. x(

[patsimae]

136. I saw your My Space picture

You are really handsome. Could easily meet another chick. You've wasted 8 years on her already, so don't waste even another second.

Men can wait forever, my brother just got married last September and he was 46, first marriage!

[Writer]

137. Try this... watch Stephen Colbert's speech at the WH press dinner...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcIRXur61II&search=colbert%20roast

Watch it. Memorize it. Internalize it. Then continue with life knowing that there is a little less bullshit in the world.

Good luck, zombienixon! :hi:

[jane_pippin]

132. Aw, man, that's no good.

:hug:
I'm sorry you're going through that.

Don't let that "I don't know what I want" stuff suck you back into dysfunction though. When she says that (if she does again) then tell her to figure it out and if she's lucky you'll still be around to hear it. (Which of course you won't be because like an adult you'll have moved on to better things). Give her her purse back and wish her good luck. Then go out, have fun, and enjoy yourself. (And for god's sake don't worry about that not getting girls business. You're young. You're a good guy. And, you're clearly confident in yourself and that goes a long way in the getting girls department.)

You're going through the sucky part but try to remember that while it sucks now, it won't suck forever.

[ZombieNixon]

133. I'm terribly underconfident in the getting girls department.

I can do practically anything else with ease, but a girl I like will turn me into a blithering idiot except on the rare occasions when she makes the first move, and that's what happened this time so I'm wary of that from now on. :(

[jane_pippin]

134. Just be confident in you.

Girls are just people. Guys I like turn me into a blithering idiot too. I'm pretty sure all of us have been there at least once in our lives. You'll be ok.

[lectrobyte]

135. Let her go. I'd personally suggest a fifth of Jose Cuervo and putting

The Wrens' "Happy" on repeat:

you're the one I want
you're a chance to take
you're a heartbreak
and swore you'd never leave again
you're the only one
that i ever trusted
or who ever cared at all
is this how it's going to be?
is this how you wanted me
broken down again
it's almost over now
is this why you wanted me
to watch as you walk away
you kept on killing me
you don't even want to touch me
you don't even want to touch me
i was wrong
i've wasted on
can't figure out
what happened to us
i won't count
on you anymore
i'll be alright
don't worry about me
aren't you happy now
got what you want
i wanted you
but i'm over that now
i'm over it
i'm so sick of you
what we went through
your lies to me
won't win again
so don't kid yourself
it's better this way
it's all back to me