Lounge LBN-James Brown named sec. of soul and foreign minister of funk

[underpants]

http://story.news.yahoo.com/news?tmpl=story2&u=/afp/20031209/od_afp/us_diplomacy_offbeat_031209131056&e=3

WASHINGTON (AFP) - US Secretary of State Colin Powell (news - web sites) has named James Brown, the so-called "Godfather of Soul," to a new and unusual, but apparently fictitious, senior diplomatic position, the State Department said.

Spokesman Richard Boucher confirmed Monday that Powell had indeed appointed Brown to be the first US "secretary of soul and foreign minister of funk" but said the job description for the post had not yet been drawn up.

In addition, he told reporters that it was uncertain whether the new title carried with it any salary or if Brown would be entitled to an office at the State Department.

Powell made Brown's appointment public on Saturday while hosting a dinner for winners of the annual Kennedy Center Honors -- awarded to US artists and performers for outstanding work -- of which Brown was one this year.

"Man, you could have livened up things at the end of a long day, when we're all dying to reach an agreement on something!" Powell said, before announcing: "Godfather, I hereby appoint you secretary of soul and foreign minister of funk."

[Metatron]

1. On a related noted

National Funk Congress Deadlocked on Get Up/Get Down Issue

CHOCOLATE CITY—After months of ceaseless debate, including last week's record 76-hour filibuster slap-bass solo from Senate Rubber Band Minority Leader Bootsy Collins (D-OH), the National Funk Congress is no closer to resolving its deadlock over the controversial "get up/get down" issue, insiders reported Monday.

More at the Onion:
http://www.theonion.com/onion3539/national_funk_congress.html

[Loonman]

2. Clinton to drop Da Bomb on Iraq

http://www.deeptrouble.com/misc/clinton_onion/clintondropsdabomb.html