What are the very first symptoms of the flu that is going around?

[Timefortruth]

Are you sure that it's somehting bad right away?

[henslee]

1. fuzzyheadedness, bodyaches.... (thats what folks around me had)

Soon you get a fever 100-101. My friend lost 12 pounds in a week... She stayed in bed for long perdiods of time, each time she thought she was better she got up and ran an errand and it just wiped her out.

My advice, REST REST REST....... and eat even though you are not hungry... Lots of soup....SHe did not eat and the whole thing lingered way too long.

[trotsky]

2. Headaches, from what I've heard.

Don't have first-hand experience, and hope not to.

[BigMcLargehuge]

3. lycanthropy

get some wolfsbane quick!

[Timefortruth]

7. I give up, what's lycantropy?

And where do I find wolfsband, and what is it?

[BigMcLargehuge]

8. lycanthropy = turning into a werewolf

just a little levity for the flu season.

[Timefortruth]

10. Man, that worries me, my husband said I was howling at the moon

last night, but I don’t remember a thing. Maybe I can get the antiviral medicine right away.

[BigMcLargehuge]

12. if not just have her beat you with a silver headed cane

it worked for Larry Talbot.

[Bossy Monkey]

14. Great minds think alike; my side effects bit:

Try Stupecia! You’ll love it! You get Stupecia by prescription. Talk to your doctor about Stupecia. You’ll be glad you did. Stupecia!

Side effects are generally mild and include minor headache, indigestion, dizziness, forgetfulness, flatulence, constipation, diarrhea, dandruff, halitosis, acne, swimmer’s ear, tennis elbow, male pattern baldness, corpulence, ugliness, projectile vomiting, Elephant Man syndrome, Lou Gehrig’s disease, leprosy, random mutations, blindness, deafness, homosexuality, spontaneous human combustion, lycanthropy, synecdoche, metonymy, botulism, priapism, socialism, jingoism, solipsism, dadaism, onanism, unionism, vegetarianism, pointillism, and vampirism. In addition, there is a slight but statistically significant possibility that your head will explode.

Stupecia! You’ll love it!


(Written a few years back when I was really really watching too much TV.)

[BigMcLargehuge]

16. and mine

I love writing these:

Ask a doctor if (insert name here) is right for you. Patients who use (insert name here) may experience the following side effects:

headache, vomiting, bleeding gums, sour stomach, explosive diarrhea, caustic flamable flattulence, constipation, gingivitis, opthorectalitis, spontaneous human combustion, paranoia, agraphobia, itchy-watery eyes, blindness, fatal sensitivity to sunlight, scratchy throat, suffocation, canine distempter, polydactylism, delusions of grandeur, delusions of chickenhood, sneezing, caughing, cancer, liver failure, kidney failure, iritable bowel syndrome, premenstrual syndrome, erectile disfunction, erectile granititis, pregnancy, miscarriage, vertigo, hypothermia, Dutch Elm disease, woody adelgid infestations, dry rot, chalking, lime scale, rust, insomnia, narcolepsy...

[Bossy Monkey]

18. It's all about the spontaneous human combustion

Yay! We should have a contest!

[geniph]

20. Happens all the time.

People just explode. Natural causes.

[Cheswick2.0]

4. first you have a runny nose

then your whole body fills with mucus,you crash your car at a gas station and suffocate to death. Other people dream of old women and corn fields. Hope you are one of the later.

[Bunny]

6. If you see the Walkin' Dude, run like hell!!!

n/t

[Rainbowreflect]

13. M-O-O-N, that spells flu.

[KC]

5. Here in NC

it seems to start with nausea, vomiting, diarrhea then sore throat, cold, bronchitis.
This is really some serious stuff going around


KC

[Robb]

9. You're asymptomatic for two days

During incubation, when you're a vector.

When symptoms begin, it'll be mild fever and general malease. By hour 12, you will really, really know something's wrong.

[Snow]

11. Let your doc know if you

start coming down with something.....they may want to see you

[soothsayer]

15. usually the flu hits you like a ton of bricks with almost no notice

you DEFINITELY know when you have it. totally incapacitated and suffering.

[geniph]

17. The only advantage of having had mono

is that it left the glands under my jaw permanently slightly enlarged. Ever since, if I start coming down with anything, the glands become as prominent as ping-pong balls. It's always very easy to tell if I'm coming down with a virus or if I'm just suffering from hay fever; if I start to get tube-neck (hello, Captain Trips!), I'm coming down with something and it's time to think about getting antivirals, right now, do not pass go, do not collect $200. (Antivirals have to be taken within 48 hours of the onset of symptoms to be effective.)

[Richardo]

19. You ask medical advice on a political forum...

:D