The Presidential Paladin of all CAPTIONS!

[Fenris]

"Hello, is this, um, Paul...let me see, I wrote it down somewhere...ah, is this Paul Morton?...Martin, right, I meant Martin...listen I just wanted to congratulate you on your coronation as Prime Priest or whatever you people have up there...I don't follow Canadian politics...hell, I barely follow American politics as it is...anyway, I wanted to say that even though your white-bread pseudo-country didn't back our totally kick-ass war in Eye-rack, I'd like to wipe the slate clean, and I hope you'll make a better leader than that slant-faced autocrat frog who came before you...that being said, I'd like to extend a warm welcome to you and your wife or homosexual life partner or whatnot and invite the two of you to Washington, oh, sometime around 2009...well, I really gotta visit the john, but don't hesitate not to call...bye now."

[wysimdnwyg]

1. Yeah, Dick, I'm in your office now

What was that thing you wanted me to get for you? Uh-huh. OK. Now where is it? OK, I'll bring it right down to you in your hole.

[XNASA]

2. "Hello. Room Service? I gakked in the wastebasket again......

..Could you send over someone to clean it up. Oh, and, while you're here, could you restock the mini-bar?"

[11 Bravo]

3. Hello, Bestiality phone sex line?

Wait a minute, let me get my hand in my pocket. Okay, now, what are you wearing?

[omshanti]

4. Hey mom, help! There's a head staring at me and I'm skeered

come get me, please mom!

[smirkymonkey]

5. Hi, uh, um....Clue Phone??

Yeah, this here is, um..uhhh...duh...Clinton, yeah, Bill Clinton...yeah, that's right, the guy with the penis. Um, well...I was..a wondering if uhmm, uh... you could give me uuhhh ...a F**kin' Clue here!!! I have no frickin' idea!! You gotta help me man...

[Bertha Venation]

6. I can't top that, Fenris.

Well done. (Order chicken.)

[underpants]

7. Hi yes would you like to buy a poinsettia to help the RNC?

:bounce:

[cosmicdot]

8. Yes, who was the wise a** who pink slipped me ... who's that laughing ...

[cosmicdot]

9. Yeah, I'm in Crawford ... yep, it's exactly identical as the oval office

... man, you should see the tunnels and stuff ... I can come and go and nobody knows ...

[kodi]

10. "Who is it? Who? Dave? Dave's not here?"

that one's for tommy chong

[Astarho]

11. I don't know any Amanda Huggenkis...